*moseys to this thread*
well, well, well, if it isn't my
favorite topic! The Wonders of the Post-Partum Vagina!
To learn more about what I, and other mamas have said on this topic here at mdc, you may enjoy these threads for your future enjoyment:
Alright, everyone jump in here and tell me the truthKinda graphic postpartum questioneverything old is new again (surgical birth = no pelvic floor probs)
KatienDwayne, you said:
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| Please, please, please don't lecture me about kegals. I've been doing them religiously since I was 12 (bad bladder), and have been doing them correctly. Had a female gyno check once. So, I know all about kegals!!! |
I've seen a pelvic floor physical therapist a few times over the past year (starting at about 4 months pp after baby #2) and I have since learned something: our bodies are amazing machines, and if one area of the body isn't doing it's job, another area will compensate, but the result can be overall poor performance.
Case in point: Once I came out of my post-partum haze,I noticed that my pelvic floor was still in a haze. I tried to kegel, but things didn't improve. I was scared, because I could hardly do A KEGEL. At 6 weeks, maybe I could to a kegel in the morning, but not by noon! Scar-y.
Off to the pelvic floor specialist, who (like your female gyno) helped me verify that, yes, I was using my muscles properly, but she also verified that there was a bit of nerve damage on the right side in this area, and if the nerve is damaged, all the commanding my brain might do to the muscle won't make it contract.
Time and patience with the area, and excericse, will make it contract eventually, and now the 'weak' area is no longer weak. BUT it took time. Maybe at 6 months pp the nerve damage was fixing itself (and this is just generic nerve damage that could happen to anyone, anywhere--you cut your hand in the kitchen, potential nerve damage, you squeeze a kid out your vagina and it pulls on a nerve a bit, nerve damage. Things DO HEAL.)
Now to address the abdominal muscles factor--after kegeling with my pelvic floor specialist, and gaining some strength in that area, it was determined that no matter how much kegeling I would do, I wasn't getting stronger. Therefore, another cause was isolated: my quads (tops of my thighs) were the only major muscles, in conjunction with my pelvic floor, that were holding me upright!
Normal people use: their abdominals, their glutes, their hamstrings, and their quads to stand around. Not their pelvic floors. My body was using my pelvic floor to make up for the unused muscles (that got lame and weak because I am a super-sedenatry person who happens to be thin and 'look' okay.)
So, ironically, this 'weak' pelvic floor 'problem' was actually my body using my strong pelvic floor in a less-than-optimal way. Now that my abs, glutes, and hamstrings are back at work, SUPRISE, a tremendous amount of stress has been aliviated from my pelvic floor.
Result? Effective kegeling, stronger, tighter, happier me. Firmer buns, too. Actual ab muscles. Better posture. No back pain.
As for being dry, time to invest in a bottle of lube. Post-partum hormones, breastfeeding hormones, maybe even the time pressure of "quick! babies are sleeping, let's get it on!" can result in a dryer Happy Place. Big whoop, it's normal, use lube for the next year, and then when your babies are older, you can enjoy the natrual lube for the next couple decades. This is a blip on the vaginal lube radar, it's scary and different than pre-baby, but it's NORMAL and okay, and will resolve itself. (I'm not trying to dimish the worries here, I'm trying to be supportive & promote an "it's all good" attitude.)
momsgotmilk4two says
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| I didn't have a problem with feeling roomy, but I had stitches both times, once for episiotomy and once for a tear. So that may have been why I was back to normal right away. In fact I was tighter than before after my first baby. I didn't feel normal for a few months at least though, I could feel scar tissue and that did go away. |
I'm glad to hear you felt normal right away, momsgotmilk4two.
I would like to point out a few tidbits about a woman's anatomy. The inside of the vagina is a muscular place, bounded by the bladder on the anterior side, and the rectum on the posterior side. This is a muscular tube. There are ligaments invloved with this area too, that hold the bladder and uterus in place.
Pregnancy puts stress on these ligaments, because pregnancy invloves a giant uterus, fetus, amniotic fluid, and slightly separated abs, which puts all of that wieght smack dab on the pelvis, and consequently, the ligaments in the pelvis. This is why for centuries, cultures have nurtured and cared for new mamas, because USING stressed ligaments ruins stressed ligaments. They need time to rest, and then they can heal and sustain stresses (like carrying things around, lifting.)
No kegel can strengthen a ligament. Those can be permanantly stretched, and it does not matter if a baby is born vaginally or c-section: pregnancy stresses the ligaments, post-partum tomfoolery (like grocery shopping 4 days post-partum or doing lots of stairs) will stress the ligaments. Football players get put on the injury list for strained ligaments.
The other anatomical tidbit is the opening to the vagina vs. the actual vagina, which is the muscular tube. The intraotis, or entrance to the vagina, the labia minora, can be different sizes, but this will not affect the size of the vagina.
For example, my intraoitis used to be a lovely, pre-baby size, that was comforable. Then, after baby #1, my OB determnined that a smaller intraoitis would be super-duper, and thus, I endured a too-tight episiotomy............which made my intraotius smaller, but OBVIOUSLY, could not chance the tightness or tone of the muscles inside my body.
Then, after baby #2, when I tore a wee bit, my intraoitus was restored to a normal size for my body. Technically speaking, it is perhaps 1 or 2 mm larger than pre-baby. It is more like my body was pre-baby, than my body was post-episiotomy.
Think of it this way--how is cutting the side of your mouth, and stitching it tight, going to change the muscle tone of the inside of your mouth/cheeks?
KristaF wondered
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| and they are all healing nicely (at least pain is going away) but it seems that one of the inner lips is tucked up and I have to pull it down and out of the way. Also, to be very honest here, the hole is still larger and open somewhat and when we try to have sex air actually enters and hurts. I know that getting too much air in that region is bad so should I be worried? |
I'm not sure what you mean about the inner lip being tucked up. I know that sometimes when a bottom is healing after tears, a skin tag can develop. I don't know much about these, other than my midwives were talking about the possibility that as my bottom healed, they could develop (because of my tear's style) and that worst-case scenario, a quality OB/GYN could cauterize 'em off (whoah!) But as it happened, I did not develop anything annoying, but maybe you're feeling annoyed, and maybe it could be something like that?
As for air wheezing in the ol' crotch, ain't that unfun? Pregnancy and birth guru/author Shelia Kitzinger says that's a symptom of weakend pelvic floor tone, and that time and kegels (ha ha!) will solve the problem and get things tight and snappy. Women need time to get 'back to normal'. I don't think it is dangerous--I have heard the old "don't blow air into the vagina while pregnant or an embolism could occur" but I think it's just uncomfy for a lady. Certain postions can cause more pneumatic action, I've noticed.
And hey--I've had lots of humerous airy crotch discussions with my cousin, a lovely nulliparus woman, who has a super-strong kegely vagina, so gettin' air happens to the best of us...pre-baby, post-baby, whatever.
Pregnancy is a huge deal. Nine months of your body getting ready to shoot a tot our your crotch. As eveyone has said, and I will echo once again, it takes time for your body to move out of "baby expulsion" mode.
HTH
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. Maybe I'm roomier (?) and this is the new normal for me...but I think giving your body time and 2 months PP is waaaay early to get worried, IME 
. Just give it some time. Don't be hard on yourself. You know they say that it takes 9 months to grow them, and at least 9 months to get your body back to normal.
