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Breastfeeding while pregnant questions

post #1 of 10
Thread Starter 
Ok first how many of us are nursing a toddler or older baby right now while pregnant?
Second how many plan to nurse through the pregnancy and tandem nurse after the baby is born?
And third is anyone else so sore, tired, and uncomfortable that they are ready to wean or at least night wean their toddler?

I managed to nurse through my 2nd pregnancy (although I did night wean him) and tandemed my boys for about 4 months until DS #1 weaned himself.

I totally planned to do the same here without the night weaning, but my breasts are soooooo darn sore that they hurt just sitting here not to mention when DS #2 latches on in and grabs a fist full like he is known to do. He is off again on again as far as waking to nurse, and last night he slept completely through from 9pm to 7am (*does happy dance* )! But there are nights like Monday where he wanted to stay attached to me from 3am on. I can bearly handle 20 mins of nursing right now let alone hours. He likes to sleep and sleeps better next to his big brother and I am wondering if now isn't the time to night wean him and move him in to a sibling bed with Austin?

The idea has so much appeal to me, not only because they will have more bonding time, but also I will have a lot more space to stretch out and sleep more soundly.

What do y'all think?

post #2 of 10
I'm 20 weeks pregnant, bfing a 31 month old even at night (although usually only once or twice). I don't really want to tandem nurse. I think the physical and emotional demands would be very hard for me. However, I won't force ds to wean, although we do set limits. But if he weaned tomorrow, I'd be a little sad, but only a little. I feel bad saying that, but I think its true. I'm just ready.
post #3 of 10
I am 13 weeks pregnant with baby #4 and I am nursing ds #3 who is 16 months. I was feeling overwhelmed by being touched so much and so I night weaned, which helped a lot. Lucas has cut down to two periods of frequent nursing a day morning and after dinner for a couple of hours. this is tolerable right now. I don't know if I could handle tandem nursing though, I have chronic reccuring mastitis every time my nursing pattern is slightly altered and I just don't think I can handle the sore breasts and nipples and fever with two babies hanging off of me.
My current plan is to gently wean after christmas, I am not sure how it will go but Lucas eats a lot of different kinds of food and drink so I know we can meet his nutritional needs without boobie milk. I hope that 4 months is long enough for him to no longer be interested in nursing but that all said I am keeping an open mind and if the weaning turns out to be too rough I would consider tandem nursing. Right now we are just going with the flow.
post #4 of 10
Wow! I am so overwhelmed with night nursing right now. I'm not even sure what to do or how to do it. Ds is almost 16 months old and I adore our nursing relationship, but night nursing is just about taking me over the edge. My breasts hurt so badly and I am starting to resent hearing his wake up sounds in the middle of the night. Gosh, it kills me just to type that. I think I want to nightwean, but I am so sad to lose that part of our time together. I just need to get some sleep. Ds wakes twice a night, sometimes three times and I'm not sure how to do it gently. I don't want him to feel rejected by me, and I know that he can't understand the milk needs to sleep now.
post #5 of 10
Thread Starter 

thank you

I am sooo glad to hear other mamas feel the same way! It is hard when all you want is everything that is good and best for your child. Cole is still my baby at 19 mos. even with this new one growing in me. I adore him and our nursing relationship and I am sad when he choses food or drink instead of me during the day. BUT! Night time is a totally different scenario! I too am dreading the sounds of him stirring, and I feel just awful.

I think we may have found a solution though. Daddy is going to bite the bullet and work on helping him settle back to sleep, even it that means walking him in the sling. I am going to go sleep in with my 3 yr old so Cole's only choice is daddy. I think (read that I hope) a few weeks will be all it will take and he will be night weaned. I hope. I know DH is not looking forward to sleepless nights, but I think he will be happy with a happier wife in the end.

Thank you ladies for sharing your thoughts. It really does help to know I am not the only one! I know from going through this with my oldest that we are in for a rough few nights possibly weeks. But, I think I am a much better mommy if I can get enough uninterupted sleep.

GL everyone, and keep me posted on your progress. I will do the same.

post #6 of 10
I have to seriously set limits. I don't usually refuse, but I don't offer and I ask them to stop after about 5 mins. My son is done, actually. He hasn't nursed for about a month. My daughter is still going strong. She wakes up only about 3 times a week though so I'm getting sleep at night. I don't let her pinch my breast or play with my belly button. I let her know that she can do those things when she is NOT nursing but not at the same time. So then she has to choose. If she won't choose, I end the nursing session early. I haven't stopped lactating since the birth of my son almost 4 years ago.
post #7 of 10
I'm 19 weeks pg and still nursing my 25 month old. Luckily for me she nightweaned herself a month or two back and that has been a wonderful relief for me. In the last month my milk has almost totally dried up and she's nursing much less. She went from about 4-6/day to at most 3/day. I'm very glad about that because it really does hurt to nurse at this time. I feel incredibly touched out even with the lessened nursing because she always wants me to hold her or sit with her and she's always touching my hair or my facial parts etc. Sometimes I just feel overwhelmed by how she still doesn't get that I'm a separate person from her. If she weaned during the pg I would not be too upset. I really have had big hopes that she would wean naturally. If she doesn't then I will tandem nurse but quite honestly I'm dreading it a bit. I have a feeling she'll go right back to nursing a million times a day and man that's going to be hard. I certainly can relate to your ambivalence.
post #8 of 10
Thread Starter 


Originally Posted by wasabi
I have a feeling she'll go right back to nursing a million times a day and man that's going to be hard.
I know that feeling! That is exactly what Austin did. For the first week or so he nursed every time Colton nursed unless he was sleeping. EVERY TIME! I figured out the amount of time and it turned out I was nursing one child or another, or sometimes both of them at the same time for what amounted to 15 hours out of every day. I really don't know if I want to do that again.

I will say one thing, the bond between my boys is amazing. There was very little jealousy from Austin towards the baby and he was an amazing helper from the start. He understood quickly that he had to wait his turn to nurse because baby Colton needed it for food, and he the big boy could have pizza! When ever Colton would cry, Austin would come find me saying "Mommy! Colton needs nursies!!" So I am glad I chose to do it then, and the one memory that really brings that home is when I was nursing them both at the same time one evening before Austin's bedtime, and Austin reached over and took Colton's hand. They held hands and fell asleep like that. It was precious.

As for now, I am not sure what is going to happen! Colton slept all night long AGAIN! So, perhaps he senses what mama is going through, perhaps he is just ready to move on himself. Now the only time he nurses is upon waking for about 5 mins, and at nap time. Daddy usually does bedtime in the sling, so we are close to being done I think.

We shall see!
post #9 of 10
I am still nursing my 17 month old son, but he has drastically cut down his nursing in the past month. Initially, he increased his nursing, from right about the time that I found I was PG. I thought there may have been a correlation. I stayed with it, even though my breasts were sore. That went away, and after we went through a period of teething and sickness, I started to night wean, just because he was eating WAY too much at night, and I was just getting VERY annoyed of it. Not that it hurt, I was just sick of it - and I thinkt there's probably a reason behind that, although I don't know exactly what it might be. Maybe its just preggo hormones... After that, he has naturally wanted less and less during the day, and has recently gotten as obsessed with his soy and rice milk as he once was with the boob. I still nursing him in the morning, at least once or twice during the day, and once before bed, although not for very long. I know I still have milk, but it has gone down dramatically. I hadn't planned on weaning him, but it feels natural.
post #10 of 10
Originally Posted by mama2simonp
I am still nursing my 18 month old. I had planed to tandem nurse but recently in thinking about it I dont know if I can handle it. He still wakes frequently and wants to hang off me all day. So we are considering weaning. Definately night weaning. I swear if he would just sleep through the night i would be ok. I think though for him not to wake to even ask i am going to have to completly wean him. But I am going to give myself a little more time to make sure this is really what we want to do. I really hate the thought of not letting him decided when to stop. I think what I need is some support from someone that has done it. I should really try going to LLL or something.
My son was 17 months old when my daughter was born. There were times during the pregnancy when I was so touched out and just about HATED nursing him. But I talked myself out of it. I realized he was nursing frequently to keep my supply up since the hormones of pregnancy sometimes cause the milk production to slow. There were days when he nursed every hour. Boy did I hate that! So I created coping techniques.
1. I counted to 100 in my head. It took me about 5 minutes with a minute = 20 count.
2. At 90, I would ask my son if he could stop nursing in 10 and then count out loud and say ALL DONE so he could unlatch.
3. I did the count at night and then offered water so he could learn to not stay latched on all night.
4. I made sure to offer snacks and drinks in cups all day so he could know that he didn't need to nurse every time he was thirsty or hungry.
5. I tried to stay busy with him like taking walks or doing active things so he didn't ask to nurse out of boredom.

There were times at night where I was practically crying because he woke up so many times. I tried walking him or reading to him or putting a cartoon on. His daddy tried rocking him too. But I think he needed to nurse that frequently to keep my supply up. I never did notice a dip in supply or a change in my milk - just a increased frequency of nursing.

He woke up much less after his sister was born. Between the two of them, I wasn't waking up any more at night than I did before she was born. He also nursed less after she was born. Hang in there It's not going to get worse. It will only get better. And if you tandem nurse, you'll be so happy when they are both latched on and quiet and fall asleep for a nap at the same time and then you can doze off too.

He just stopped nursing a month ago and it was very gradual. He went to 1-2x a day around his 3rd bday and then it changed to 1-2x a week and then 1-2x a month. Then he just stopped asking.
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