What to call female genitalia

[BusyBee]

My husband and I are having a hard time finding anatomically correct, respectful names for female genitalia. With our son it was easier, for us the names penis and testicles etc are accurate and respectful. Vagina only works for a small little hole, but pee-pee doesn't come out of it and she is starting to potty train. Is there a term for the entire female genitalia as a whole. We thought of Yoni, but it just seems too cute. "Boys have a penis, girls have a yoni"... We thought of just "genitals", but that isn't sex specific. Any ideas? what works for you?

[khrisday]

wel, we use yoni
I don't think it's "cutesy"- it's a sanskrit term
But I have friends who use "vulva"

[BusyBee]

I never knew where "yoni" came from, I just heard it used several times. I didn't know it was a sankrit term. Thanks for informing me.

[newmainer]

we use yoni too. it's easier for her to say, and honestly, I just can't say "vulva" all day . When she's older we'll introduce those terms, but right now, yoni is fine. I refer to mine as yoni too, so it's not weird.

[Justice2]

From Holitstic Midwifery:

"Yoni is an East Indian word and was the primary object of Tantric worship, representing the Great Mother, the source of all life."

It's was we use too.

[Meiri]

We use vulva, which is the medically accepted name for the external female genitalia in English.

I've heard, and had confirmed by those who educate on child abuse, that abusers avoid children who know the accurate names for their private parts. No room for interpretation when the child can state clearly what was touched in words that don't need parental translation.

[Jordansmommy]

I am also in favor of yoni though I still have to convince DH....

However this is a hilarious bit on the topic: Cheeseburgers

[eilonwy]

We use vulva, but when I was showing my niece how to wipe BooBah (she's seven and likes to help) I explained that the two lips were labia and that the whole thing (on the outside) is a vulva. I'm with Meiri-- I will use the correct terms because I've heard that it helps to prevent child sexual abuse. It also eliminates irritating cutesy talk from other people, it tends to stop them cold when they hear a child say something like "it's not a hoohoo, it's a vulva" or "it's not a weewee, it's a penis."

At Thanksgiving dinner, apparently some of my brother's IL's were teasing my niece and calling her by my son's name. She told them "I'm not Eli, I don't have a penis," and they all stopped cold. :LOL

[carolsly]

We call them girl parts and boy parts. 6yo dd is being taught the proper names right now because she is in a more public setting and she needs to know the names. In turn, she will probably teach our younger dd. We're okay with our bodies in this house and talk about them freely and what the function of each part is. It's our choice. "wash your girl parts." is a common phrase in this house.

[Parker'smommy]

Originally Posted by Meiri

We use vulva, which is the medically accepted name for the external female genitalia in English.

I've heard, and had confirmed by those who educate on child abuse, that abusers avoid children who know the accurate names for their private parts. No room for interpretation when the child can state clearly what was touched in words that don't need parental translation.

This is EXACTLY why we have chosen to just call their private parts what they are- Penis, vulva, vagina, scrotum, etc......

I also feel that I call my head - a head and my hand - a hand. I don't feel that just because my private parts are well, private that they need a cute name. I say call them what they are.

[onlyzombiecat]

I try to use the correct names, dh just says "private parts".
I want dd to feel that there isn't anything more embarrasing or dirty about proper terms for her genitals than her elbow or mouth so I don't do slang. I think it will make open communication easier.
I also want her to know the parts of her body so she can tell me or a medical professional if there is a problem and where it is.

[Katie Bugs Mama]

We use "vulva" too. When she was really little, DH used to call her whole diaper area her "euphamism." :LOL

[sunnmama]

We use vulva.
When dd was littler, she called it "front heiny" and "back heiny"--even though we used the word vulva

Just curious: for those (like us) who use anatomical terms for the genitals, are you equally specific for the buttocks? We never use that word

[jadegirl553]

Originally Posted by Katie Bugs Mama

"euphamism."

: that is so funny!

[Lula's Mom]

We use vulva (and we just say "butt", sunnmama.) Lula loves knowing the words- in fact, last week she made up a song to the tune of "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star"...

"Vulva,vulva, butt butt butt..." :LOL

[eilonwy]

Originally Posted by sunnmama

Just curious: for those (like us) who use anatomical terms for the genitals, are you equally specific for the buttocks? We never use that word

We use anus for anus, but we rarely say buttocks. For some reason, the word buttocks always sets me off laughing and thinking of Monty Python...: :LOL I usually say "behind" or "backside."

[AnnMarie]

We use vulva too. I don't know why, but I hate the term yoni. I don't see what's wrong with just calling it what it is?

[poppywise]

good question!

hi - i have a 4 yr old son and an 18month daughter - agreed that the male genitalia was much easier for some reason ? thanks for all the info. my dd is too young for 'elimination communication' to start, but we were having to field questions from ds about her parts [or lack thereof in his opinion! :LOL ]
i was planning to go with 'yoni' - i find it to be a gentle/soothing word, but i now understand the importance of just calling it what it is! thanks-jennifer

[bec]

Originally Posted by Jordansmommy

However this is a hilarious bit on the topic: Cheeseburgers

What's amazing is if you read down to the comments, so few people use the correct terms (or even Yoni). It's like there is this compulsion to not talk directly about genitals. The extent and crackpot names that they do come up with is amazing! Hoo-hoo, cha-cha, bottom system, front butt, the list goes on and on! Can you imagine not knowing the name for such a basic part of your body?!


Bec

[Arwyn]

I use genitals for general ("Please don't touch your genitals in public"), penis/scrotum/testicles/urethra when talking boy specifics, and clitoris/vulva/vagina/urethra when talking girl specifics. I've called the anus "anus" before, when cleaning a diaper ("I need to make sure I got your anus all clean!"), but since what I'm usually working on is between or on the butt cheeks, I usually say "butt". (I have the same association between Monty Python and "buttocks"!)

Of course, as has been previously mentioned, what kids actually /hear/ may end up being completely different! But, if used regularly, kids will pick up and use those words correctly, just like all other words.

On a related note, breasts are only "boobs" or "boobies" or anything other than "breasts" when I'm telling a joke or being particularly silly (I told DH the other day "you elbowed my booby! my booby hurts now" and he couldn't stop laughing. it's a really funny word). Other than that, (including when a baby is nursing) they're BREASTS.

But then, my mom's a family doc, and I grew up talking colonoscopies and contraception at the dinner table. *shrugs*