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Should MDC add a forum for POC? - Page 2

Poll Results: Should MDC add a forum for POC?

 
  • 53% (61)
    Yes
  • 46% (54)
    No
115 Total Votes  
post #21 of 82
I think its dangerous to lump all the "minorities" together. It serves to cloud the issues I feel. People are really afraid of dealing with the "race" issue....

Besides more than one "minority" has expressed a problem with the use of that word.


Nursing Mother....I'm sorry about the "peeps" think. I tend to write on boards the way I speak and sometimes it doesn't translate very well.

MM
post #22 of 82
Third post in a row, sigh.

Mamapie, I wouldn't object to the lumping of boards together to make a marginalized parenting forum but others might. I can see an argument being that some topics might get lost. Hmmm.

Kylix
post #23 of 82
I was being facetious. Sorry guys.

Of course you can't lump those three together. You can't lump this whole board together and make it one giant parenting issues board either.

If there is to be a POC board, I think it would be great to include in its description POC and other marginalized ethnicities. That would give validation to people like Britt, etc, who are disturbed by the idea as it stands.

This conversation is making me really dizzy.
post #24 of 82
In truth, I don't like the term "minority" very much either.

Riddle me this: how will a POC board serve differently than what we have now? It is a place to bitch and moan about everyone not your color? Is it a place to talk about issues entirely exclusive to POC? Is there such a thing?
post #25 of 82

YES

I strongly support a POC forum. It is also my belief that this should be a POC forum for POC only, if that is so desired by POC. My contention being, that as a white woman, there are experiences which I will not experience, and things which no matter how hard I try to empathize, I will never personally know. While I may attempt to understand those experiences, by their very nature, they remain separate. There are numerous other experiences I can and do share with POC, and I feel there are plenty of other forums where we may discuss those in union. However, I strongly support a safe and separate haven, if that is so desired.

Regards,
Jessie
post #26 of 82

Jumping up and down saying, Yes, yes, yes!

MamitaMala's point makes me sad, but I understand it. But, like kylix said, I don't think the risk of controversy is a good reason not to do this.
post #27 of 82
I couldn't vote either (is it a conspiracy...) but I say yes. I'm a straight, white, married mother and it is hard for me to find support as an AP parent. I'm sure it's that much harder when one is marginalized for other factors as well. I am happy that MDC has a queer parenting forum and a s ingle parenting forum, and I am surprised that it does not already have a POC forum. Also, I am here for support, but more than that to learn. The greater the diversity of members (color, orientation, political leanings, nationalities, etc., etc.) the more opportunity I will have to broaden my mind/spirit/parenting style. I don't participate in the queer parenting forum, but I know that the rest of the board is enriched by the presence of members who are here partly due to the existence of that forum. I am proud to be part of a community where such forums exist.
post #28 of 82
Quote:
how will a POC board serve differently than what we have now? It is a place to bitch and moan about everyone not your color? Is it a place to talk about issues entirely exclusive to POC? Is there such a thing?
Not picking on the person who asked this, just wanted to answer.

I don't get what you don't get. Being of color is something that makes a parent and their child different than other parents and children. The problems/ issues one runs into in one's life when one is different in any way are easier and more logical to be discussed with people who have that same difference.

Of course there is such a thing as issues exclusive to a person who is of color that a person who is not of color does not have to deal with nor relate to.

If the Mamas of color want a forum then why would anyone deny it to them?

I remember a poll about a children with disabilities forum. It was only asked to and answered by the people who it would be used by (parents of said children). I answered it too, because DH is disabled. It was decided, if I recall corectly that they would not have a forum for that but that those parents wanting such a forum might try ssrting a "finding your tribe" thread to see who was interested in such a forum.
What I was getting at is that noone asked the parents with kids without disabilities if the forum should be opened for those who would use it........

I am so sad that people can't get along.........

-BelovedBird
post #29 of 82

Yes ~ to Families of Color

I am colorless ~ I'm so white, I'm blue! But, following my evolutionary duty, I bred with taller and tanner
So, though I'm PWOC, I'm raising two *very tan* kids in a wonderbread area. I would love to have a place specifically for issues related to attitudes related to skin color. HOWEVER, this does not mean that I cannot find this support on MDC already, I do and will continue to

P.S. an exlusionary board is a BAAAAD idea, I surf the Dads and the Queer Parenting boards, though I'm neither ( am I in trouble now??). The board should support the Mothering idea of full inclusion.
post #30 of 82
First of all, granted I am having a slow day but. . .It took me while to figure out what POC meant so you might want to add a definition at the top somewhere so that slow people like me get it. Just a suggestion.

And for the question at hand. I really don't have an opinion either way. i guess if POC or other minorities feel they need a seperate forum to talk about things then I guess let the have one. My concern is that if there are needs in any group of people that stem from the fact that they are apart of that group i think it would benifit the whole community to learn about these struggles and ways we can gaurd against being artof the problems or ways we can be more sensitive. Does that make any sense? I think we all have a lot of wisdom to offer each other but if all seperate into little groups there won't be a lot of sharing going on. Also topics that might better be discussed in the larger forums might just get stuck in a particular groups forum because that is where the poster feels most comfortable and everyone else will miss out because they don't think that anything in that forum would apply to them. But like I said if that is what people (any group of people) want then i don't mind if they have it.
post #31 of 82
All these threads on this issue are making me loopy


I just posted this in one of the other threads which I am sure most of you have read but it kind of applies here also:



I think perhaps some of the issues that have come up re: a POC thread revolve more around that fact that we all have a different "idea" of what the parameters of the thread would/should be and our own experiences with such forums as other places. I keep wondering if Peggy O/Cynthia/Mothering just simply came here one day and and opened a thread entitled "Parents of Color" [or "Families of color"] in the same area as Queer Parenting and Single Parenting and then gave the following description:

"a place to share the special concerns and joys of families of color. Guiding your children and yourselves through the mainstream world. Protecting your children from racism and educating others. etc..."

would anyone have been disturbed? I mean there is nothing in that title that excludes anyone (POC, PWOC, child of POC, parent of POC) from posting just like the Queer Parenting board description doesn't exclude anyone from posting. I think in such a place the type of comfort, advice, concerns, support, questions, and experiences that someone with say, Britt's background, would be welcome and encouraged. At least I would hope it would be...as this is the type of place I
envision when I think about a POC forum.

And I will only add that I disagree that if we open a thread for this we would need to or should open one for Pagans and/ or Christians. They already have a forum, called Spirituality. If a Pagan or a LDS or a Christian or a Jewish parent
wants support, advice or comfort revolving around their religion they know exactly where they can go to get what they need: Spirituality. I do not think that right now there is the same type of forum available for Parents Of Color. I would like to see it available, that's all.


Belovedbird- I agree I am unclear as to why anyone would want to deny it to them if they want it.

Lilyka - I believe that most people frequent the forums of most interest to them or where they feel they have something to learn or something to share. I am sure many issues that would be discussed in a POC forum would be of benefit the larger group as a whole but I am afraid as the board currently stands a POC (and I mean Parent of Color)who is looking for advice/support specific to being a POC doesn't really have a place to go....I mean do they go to the specific age group of their child?...but then another parent who has someting to offer but doesn't have a child in that age group wouldn't be looking there, right?
post #32 of 82
Not sure if I should still post since these threads will be closed and lumped together but here goes--

I keep hearing (reading?) people say that they are afraid that a POC forum will cause ppl to go off in their little groups and therefore prevent this community from being a full community. Well, for those people, I have a very innocent question. I'm just wondering if these people have the same issues with the queer and single parenting forums? Do they feel that they divide the community and that certain members only frequent those areas and prevent us from being whole? I sometimes lurk in those forums and while there are members' names there that I do not normally see in other forums, most of those members post in other forums quite frequently. AND even those who stick to one of those respective forums, so what? There are some members who only go to TAO or only go to Spirituality or Diapering etc etc. It's not different than anything else.

I am just SO surprised that ppl are taking such issue with the making of a POC forum. It makes me wonder what the real reasons behind saying no is because the divisive argument just isn't much of an argument for me. I'm here to say that I am a POC who would like a POC forum that is not exclusionary and who despite posting there would remain posting in the other forums here at MDC just as fervently and frequently as I do now.

Much love,
Kylix
post #33 of 82
Quote:
I am just SO surprised that ppl are taking such issue with the making of a POC forum. It makes me wonder what the real reasons behind saying no is because the divisive argument just isn't much of an argument for me. I'm here to say that I am a POC who would like a POC forum that is not exclusionary and who despite posting there would remain posting in the other forums here at MDC just as fervently and frequently as I do now.

Much love,
Kylix
I keep wondering the same thing myself, Kylix: I was going to post the very same question about the other two forums (Queer and Single) and why there just doesn't seem to be any issue with them....or is just because we weren't asked before they were created In some ways, as I alluded to above, I wish MDC had just created the POC board without asking for general opinions about it...I think many of the problems which people are projecting will happen wouldn't have happened and that any problems that did happen would have worked themselves out.....
post #34 of 82
I am not specifically against a POC board at all; I think if the need is there then go for it. I guess when you compare it to the dads forum or the queer boards, it makes sense.

When it comes down to it, am I just naive in thinking that we all have the same issues: the need for love and acceptance, the need to belong and feel valued, the need/desire to provide for our children, the hurt isolation and rejection can bring? I, for one, would be saddened if the mothers of color abandoned ship on the regular boards (not saying it would happen), or felt as if they could only discuss certain things on their board. I learn more from differing points of view than with POV that are exactly like mine. I like to be challenged with my thinking~what if the most challenging subjects are left to boards where I wasn't welcome or invited?
post #35 of 82
Quote:
Originally posted by indiegirl
I like to be challenged with my thinking~what if the most challenging subjects are left to boards where I wasn't welcome or invited?
indiegirl- I think you certainly bring up a valid concern...I also want to be challenged and learn. But I am wondering why you would think you wouldn't be welcome or invited to a POC forum?? I mean every once in a while I will venture over to the Queer Parenting forum and read what is being written and I usually learn something. Once I wrote and offered support regarding a specific issue. I was thanked for that support. I guess I can find no reason to believe my experience would be any different reading or posting in a POC forum.
post #36 of 82
Thread Starter 
Also for those of us that read the boards as "view new posts" going to a certain forum isn't needed. They all show up :-)
post #37 of 82
Exactly Diedre.
post #38 of 82
I would have voted yes, it the poll would let me vote.

As a mostly white person raising a child of color, I would like to look in one place for the issues my ds is likely facing. Additionally, I would love to get advice here and there and a dedicated forum is the best place to get that.

Even though this discussion has raised many divisive issues, the fact that everyone has continued to talk through them shows what a strong community we have at MDC!
post #39 of 82
Thread Starter 
I can't believe so many are having a problem voting!! That sucks!

JW~ view new posts
http://mothering.com/discussions/index.php?s=

after you are logged in it shows ya what's new since your last visit :-)

or were you joking??
post #40 of 82
Thread Starter 
yes, if your not logged in, it says "view active threads" when you are logged in then it shows "view new posts" since your l;ast visit. But it's the Whole Boards new posts.
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