can preparing for PPD before the birth increase chances of having it?

[eveerickson]

I am glad to find this forum of women to discuss such an intimate and difficult issue for me. Depression runs in my family and I have been diagnosed in the past with depression and took prozac for a time(5 years ago). I experienced PPD symptoms after my first son's birth (he is now 2) but didn't seek professional help. I am pregnant again and due to give birth next month. I have had ups and downs during this pregnancy and have learned to cope with my feelings better than at other times in my life. I attribute this to my growing relationship with God and accepting myself in a more positive light. However, I felt a definite shift in hormones and my ability to cope in this past month and wonder if it can be attributed to normal third trimester changes (shift in focus, feelings of concern over birth, how I will adjust afterwards, feeling more anxiety, unable to relax and sleep occasionally, doubting my husband's ability to handle me and other things, etc.) I wonder, though, and this is my major question I hope someone can answer: I am afraid that by "preparing" for PPD before birth somehow I am giving into it. Like, if I don't think I will have it, I can actually keep it from coming and overtaking me. Has anyone else felt anything similar to this? I plan on asking for and accepting help with caring for my toddler and various cooking and cleaning tasks, but as for counseling and med's, I am more hesitant to be proactive. I really don't want to clutter my time and energy looking for all the answers that will "fix" me during such an already stressful time (post partum). Any comment on this post is welcome. I would like to know if this sounds familiar to anyone.

[kaydee]

That's tough question. It seems like you are asking whether it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. My initial instinct is to say that wise preparedness-- being aware of your propensity for depression, knowing the signs that you are becoming or are depressed, developing a support system, having a plan in place to get help (counseling or medication or whatever has worked in the past--is a good thing. Being overly anxious and about the possibility of becoming depressed is probably *not* a good thing, though. Does that make sense?

Being prone to extreme anxiety, I find that for me, having a plan in place "just in case" allows me to release my fears and stop being so hypervigiliant, thus decreasing the likelihood that I will fall into an anxiety freefall that can lead to depression.

HTH!

[Jish]

If you search around on this board you can find many natural steps you can take to help avoid ppd such as increasing your B vitamin intake, taking omega 3's and exercising. I think preparing is a good thing. I was unwilling to go on proactive meds after this baby was born because I wanted to know if it was going to be a problem before trying to solve it. It seemed silly to take meds that I didn't need. My babe is 9 months and I am still doing fine. I know it could still creep in at any time, but I feel like just knowing that and admitting that helps me to be on top of things.

When I was pregnant I decided that my goal was to make it until my babe was a month before going on meds if at all possible. I just wanted to get him out of that newborn phase before going on meds. I knew that I might need them before that, but decided that I would cross that bridge when I got to it. I felt more in control because I had a contingency plan and knew what to watch for.

I don't think that by admitting that you might possibly have to deal with ppd after the baby is born is going to make it more probable that you will have it. If you obsess about it, it might cause some anxiety that could start a vicious cycle, but simply knowing that it could be a problem might make you feel more in control of it in the long run.

I wish I had a better answer for you. Hopefully, you will sail through with no problems.

[eveerickson]

On with the birth and PP preparation! :)

Thanks for your input. I feel better thinking that I can make some plans and that I can make active choices (nutrition, exercise, seeking further help later if needed, etc) to be a happier person. I feel the main reason for my original post was that I really don't want to "go through" PPD again, but I guess if I made it through once, I can do it again if faced with it. I am glad I have been through a tough time like PPD (with my first child's birth). I feel I can empathize with others who experience depression and anxiety and acknowledge it for the illness it is. I also am grateful for the real character building experience it was. It was hard; I don't want to downplay it and when you're in the middle of it, it's hard to see the bright side. But it's so good to know it's not my "fault" to have PPD. And good to know I do have some control over how I face my life challenges and where I can place my trust: in God, myself, my family and other support (La Leche League was helpful during the breastfeeding issues that ensued). Thanks again for your replies. It's good to read others' viewpoints!

[xenomama]

Not preparing for PPD is asking for a disaster. You've already had it. Ask yourself why wouldn't you have it again? Just put the plan into place so that all you have to do is go. Make a Dr. appt for about 2-3 after your EDD. You can always cancel it.

P.S. I didn't have time to read the other responses. This is just how I feel - I got severe PPD, and I was still slammed even though I was prepared.

[eqleslie]

I do agree that often times if you make a contingency plan you won't stress as much about the What if it Happens. I also think that you should definately wait and see if it happens before you take meds or anything. I feel like taking meds for something you might get is like taking an asprin because you think you'll get a headache this afternoon If you were into counseling, the counseler may help you make a contingency plan that would work well for you and help you prepare for not having it also. (Although I don't really believe you can control it very much because it's mostly chemical)

[Jish]

My ppd totally sucked, I was undiagnosed for a year (although I was seeing my dr regularly for my symptoms) and got to the point where the anxiety mimicked heart symptoms and I eventually ended up in the hospital for six days. While I never want to be in that place again, it taught me a lot about myself and I now see it as a blessing. Because of it, I have helped many, many women at my bfing support group recognize their symptoms and get help. I am a very self confident person and very outgoing and it seems to help new moms when they find out that I suffered from depression. It seems to help remove the stigma that it is some sort of personal weakness. It's sort of like, "well if she had it, then anyone could have it." They feel much less like they have done something wrong, or that if only they were stronger/more together/a better mother -- then they wouldn't feel like that.

I know it's hard to look as PPD as a blessing now, but you know what to expect and that it can be treated. It's not a death sentance so to speak. I wish you the best of luck on your delivery and babymoon. If you find yourself slipping after the birth, seek help early and hang with us here.

[stirringleaf]

i totally totaly agree that preparing is a good idea. maybe focus on preparing practical details the most. i like the idea of setting up an appt after your due date. i was lucky and had a midwife in training come visit me after DS was born ( for free becasue she was training) . maybe you can find something like that? like ask around?

also plan helpers for yourself if you can. make a list of phone numbers you can call, etc.

another idea i had just now was what if you made yourself a letter to read later, like put in the letter all the things that helped you through PPD the first time?

for me it was imagining myself laughing one day with my son, just freely laughing.

but if you made a list of things like that , things to remember, to tell yourself, to support yourself...it might help as i know all that goes out the window when in the thick of it...and of course post back here all the time, that was such a blessing in my life during my PPD also on that note i would print this very thread as the advice above is really good and i REALLY like what Jish said.

[crunchyconmomma]

Are we mirrors of each other right now?

I am in the same boat as you right now - had PPD with first son who is now a little over 2 and am due in the next few (2-3) weeks with babe #2. In the last week I have been having horrible swings that feel just like the PPD did with my firstborn. I have also been enriching my life with God and that is helping, but unfortunately not enough. AND I have been wondering JUST LIKE YOU if planning and preparing for it now is making me "give in" to it. I feel like such a strong person but this just overwhelms me in a way that I can't describe even to myself. BUT, I have had great success with Bach Flowers. If you don't know anything about them I would be happy to let you know about them, but I won't waste the cyberspace/time until I know you want the info. There are great books on them that you can get on Amazon and although it becomes pricey if you decide to get a whole kit of all 38 remedies plus the Rescue Remedy, my opinion is they are well worth it. They have helped our family in countless ways, not just with my PPD. And they worked splendidly on kids b/c they seem to be even more "untainted" if you will by all the things we adults get exposed to in a lifetime.
One more thing, I have been really in love with the Conversations With God series of books by Neale Donald Walsh and recommend them to everyone. They don't deal with our situation in specific, but they are very inspirational and make all of life a little better for me.
Take care and best of luck! Kate

[Ruby Pearl]

I had PPD with my first child and was totally unprepared to deal with it and motherhood at the same time. This time around, knowing that I was at risk of getting it I joined a support group during my pregnancy and set up a strong support system just in case. One of my supporters was my SIL Charlottesmom who is also a member here. I feel that having my support system in place and educating myself actually helped prevent me from getting PPD this time because I didn't feel alone with it and I knew that other's were watching out for it as well in case I missed the early symptoms. It also helped that when I did have trouble coping I was not ashamed to ask for help and knew who I could and couldn't turn to in a pich. If you feel you are at risk of getting PPD, then IMO you should definitely get help while you are pregnant.

[lizzie]

I've never posted in this forum before, and I'm not even expecting right now, but this thread really caught my eye. I had PPD after my ds (2nd baby) and it took me at least six months to start functioning at what I considered to be a reasonable level, and longer than that to realize that PPD was my issue. I was, retrospectively, so FRUSTRATED that no one, including me, realized what was happening, and I was in some mom's groups, saw my doctor regularly.. all that. I think I was just trying so hard to seem in control around others, that I convinced myself I was okay. (I doubt that I convinced anyone else, least of all my husband)

I also learned since then that my depression was already there, and then PPD exacerbated everything. I'm on meds now for it, and can't believe the positive difference in my life. I have an ever-deepening relationship with God as well, and I think as a Christian I felt guilty for seeking help outside of standard church and prayer type things, but now see that chemical imbalances are as far out of my control as most of the rest of life, and taking medication isn't a cop-out, it's my responsibility to my children and myself to stay healthy so that I can give them what they need.

I also think that my personality (forceful, outgoing, independent and talkative - can you tell? ) really discouraged people from suggesting to me that I was having symptoms of PPD. They didn't want to make me any angrier than I was!

But the point of the post is that I'm actually looking forward to being able to prepare for it the next time around. I feel almost liberated from the fear of it because now I can set up the support systems and talk with my doctor/midwife/friends and family in advance, so they'll know what to watch for. I'm also going to be more aware of my diet and better educated about options other than prescription meds, so I can breastfeed in peace.

lizzie

[eveerickson]

update

I can identify with the anger about not receiving the help while in the midst of PPD. I have since moved on and forgiven those I feel just weren't able to help, who I think should have been (like my midwife, church leader, etc.). For this pregnancy, I have a different midwife than I had with my first son who is much more able to listen to my feelings and validate them. And for those other people who just don't "get it", (people who thought I would just snap out of it eventually) I ignore them and listen to my heart. The communication in my marriage between my husband and myself has improved and I'm glad I got these 3rd trimester mood swings so he realizes I need his help. (He works 24/7 but had recently been making more of an effort to be around home with me and our son)

I have called and spoken with a lady who used to head up a local PPD support group, which ran out of funding. I contacted a local hospital-run women's education center and tried to hook the support group leader up with the hospital to start a support group for women, but that didn't pan out. (issues about not having the right "credentials", etc.) As far as I know, and I live in a city with a million plus people, there are NO support groups for women with post partum issues. I wish I had more get-go to start one up. But I am glad to have this forum to turn to. I also researched and found a woman counselor with experience in women's issues and a reliable internal medical doctor who can test the thyroid for a connection there. I haven't gotten in touch with them, but having their numbers reassures me that if I need extra help PP, I can find it more easily when I am not feeling like being proactive.

My husband bought me a book about women's feelings after childbirth for Christmas and I have skimmed throught it. It's by Sally Plaskin, "Mothering the New Mother", I think it's called. That had good suggestions. And I am glad I have a La Leche League group I am involved with so I can go and be around other moms after this one's birth.

Thanks for sharing with me all your experiences and advice. I have Rescue Remedy already and am interested in learning about other Bach flower remedies. Maybe I'll check it out a little more. Good nutrition, sleep (rest) and exercise really do wonders. Just taking care of oneself can do so much!! So, in about 2 or 3 weeks I'll give birth to my little one and I'll be taking it easy with extended family to help out and having my babymoon for a week and just healing and nursing for about 6 to 8 weeks minimum. I am hoping for the best and preparing for the post partum period! Here's hoping for a change from the first time around!

[jchinique]

plan plan plan

my experience:
after severe ppd/ppp with my first, I underwent a few years of counseling and meds before even thinking about getting pregnant again... i was told that the likelihood of a second ppd increases 25% after each major depression. i found a med that was safe to take while pregnant and nursing and stayed on it. I saw a "women's issues" counselor every 2 weeks then weekly until my second son was born. we set up a plan which included discussing my expectations of the birth, nutrition, exercise, and putting a solid support system of friends and family into place. with the help of my ob-gyn we also set up home visits with a psychiatric social worker for 2 4 and 6 weeks post partum to monitor my state of mind.
I do not think any of this was "overkill" and luckily I made it through with only a hint of what I experienced the first time.
I hope you are doing well.
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