How to deal with nursing q's and language barrier?

[the_lissa]

Okay, my next door neighbour is the nicest woman in the entire world. She is an elderly lady, so we help her out by taking her garbage out and things like that. She loves the baby, so I often take the baby over to visit her. She often gives us treats like cabbage rolls, pastries, fruit, whatever. She has bought Jocelyn toys and now an outfit for Christmas.

She mentioned something the other day that we have to stop nursing at 12 months. I just said Oh. She is from Hungary originally and has a very thick accent. We have a hard time understanding each other, so I didn't want to explain how recommendations have changed since she was a young mother and all the benefits, etc.

Should I just change the subject when it comes up? As she lives next door, she may see us nursing sometime on the porch or in the back yard.

I respect this woman so much. She is a survivor of the Holocaust and the HUngarian revolution, and has led an amzing life. I want her to respect me, and not think I am weird or anything. (I h ave already lied to her about cosleeping.) I just wish there was a way I coudl explain extended breastfeeding to her, but we have a hard enough time talking about the weather.

Any tips on how to handle this situation?

[mamajama]

I suggest acting upon the respect you have for her by being yourself. I mean this woman sounds like she has a lot of experience with people. I'm sure she has met and probably loved her share of weirdos. Don't lie to her. Give her credit to be able to be open to your differences of opinions.
It may not be an *issue* for her at all. If it is, she probably has the smarts to be able to see your side.
Think about it, you still love and respect her even though she believes babies should be weaned at 12 months. Don't you think she has the capability to love and respect you even though you don't?

[azyre]

This might be easier than you expect - you already have cultural differences and so this is just another one Just a "oh, we nurse longer" a few times is plenty I imagine.

[velcromom]

I doubt it will phase her much, boy it sure sounds like she's seen a lot. I'm sure she has a good perspective on what is truly negative in this world and what is not. Maybe just say, "isn't it interesting how much has changed in the last few generations..." if it comes up. If you don't take it as a negative that your outlooks are different she probably won't either. Sounds like a wonderful neighbor you have.

[mum2 4]

YOu may be able to get a Hungarian language info sheet on bf from LLLI (lalecheleague.org) They have a number of foreign language publications. if she mentions weaning at a year again ask her why this was a custom in her country and that the World Health Orginaization now recommends up to 2 years of nursing to boost baby's immune system which is not fully mature until about age 6.
There are all sorts of "old wives tales" regarding extended bf especailly about boys & their Moms...