Jan. Mamas Dec. 19-25 - Page 3

[Celtain]

WOW, you shavers have me totally impressed!!! I have't had a razor touch my legs in about 2 months. I just don't care, it seems like wayyyyyyyyyyy too much work to me!!!!

[JesiLynne]

I only shave up to my knees, I can't reach any higher, and I only shave if my legs are gonna show.
And pubic area, I haven't even been able to see it in months, much less shave it. I did have dh trim it for me b/c I knew it was getting out of hand.
My armpits are another story.
I shave them maybe once a weeks, just b/c I feel icky if I don't.

[fromscatteredtribe]

i do shave my armpits regularly for smell but the shave the legs thing is a big conspiracy against women anyway; i gave up shaving my legs four years ago and the hair stopped growing, turned lighter, softer, and even my dearest friends don't know i don't shave and people wear shorts year round here (it's in the 60s and 70s during the day this week; 50's at night). at first it's a little stubbly, but my arms are fifty times hairier than my legs are since i stopped shaving them. i trim the longest pubic hairs over the toilet and do the rest while laying down in the bath. it's a horrible mess i have to shower the hairs out of the tub, but it is the only way i can really see anything. most of it is by feel anyway and i am afraid to cut myself in such a sensitive spot (sure to go through enough work during pushing-- doesn't deserve my cruelty).

[jessitron]

Shaving pubic hair is possible because I could never see it anyway; I don't wear my contacts in the shower.

Fascinating about the leg hair. I have really dark hair, so I assumed it would be really ugly on my legs. But my arm hair is fine and hard to see, so maybe not. What color is your hair, fromscatteredtribe? How long did it take for the leg hair to be fine and nice?

[rubysmomjess]

I have to agree with Leenie...shaving seems like way too much work. Plus I never get to take a shower or bath by myself.

Today is my last day day of work for a while. I'm exhausted and ready to hang out and play with dd. I'm also ready to be done with Christmas and all that. I still have some shopping to do, too. It's supposed to be pretty cold (20-30F as the high) and snowy the rest of the week but I'm hoping not so bad that dd and I can't take the bus to the outdoor shopping mall and play a bit in the process. I suppose we could drive, but then we'd have to pay for parking and dd LOVES to take the bus.

This baby has finally grown enough to get under my ribs. Can be sooo uncomfortable.

Oh and my grandmother died. Mom decided to tell me infront of friends at the end of dd's birthday party on Saturday. I'm kind of sad. I know it's good she's not suffering anymore, but I still feel a bit of a loss. We won't be flying to Chicago for the funneral. I would like to go but I just don't think I can handle traveling at this point. It's weird but I also kind of mourn the fact that I didn't get to spend more time with my grandparents. As much as sometimes I wish we didn't live so close to our parents, I really like the fact that my kids will get to spend more time with their grandparents than I did with mine. Our parents drive me crazy but I still think it's really important that my kids get to know them, quirks and all.

Anyway I'll stop rambling.

On the kids thing...we're really lucky, my sister is going to come be with dd during the birth. Sister isn't really interested in being at the birth, but being there for dd and being the first to meet new baby is pretty appealing I think if dd was older I wouldn't need someone there for her, but she just turned 2 and she's pretty dependent on Mom for comfort. But she adores my sister so I think things will be ok.

Hope everyone is having a good week.

[LEAW]

Jess, I'm sorry to hear about your grandma, what bad news to get in front of friends.

Jesi - ooh I read "big knife" and thought what in the world does he need a big knife for... I'm glad it's a kitchen knife

I love the shaving chat. Usually in the winter I only shave if it's important or I have to wear a skirt. Dh wouldn't even notice if I grew thick fur on my legs, he's never noticed or said anything before. I only keep up on pubic hair during swimsuit season, can't see it now anyway! And my pits are a regular thing, every few days, although I did grow them out once, and the smelly goes away once they start to get soft again. Dunno how that works!

Oooh the backup mw, icky yucky, don't like her. She's just like my OB, and she was so rude about me making an informed decision on abx for gbs - apparently the hospital she works at actually will seek legal intervention if you refuse abx, which I just think is nuts! If I had to go there, we'd be doing an UC at home!! So belly and I had a long chat this afternoon about coming NOW (prior to Christmas afternoon) or waiting until due date or later. I told little belly it was his/her choice about who would be there to catch, and that I really wanted our mw. I hope s/he's listening!

I guess we can just stay home forever and then go in and take whomever is on call that night in OB too, that might be a better solution. I fired my OB in June because she was overmanaging me, and I knew I'd be fighting for what I wanted the entire way, and I've been so happy with mw, now I'm all bummed. I guess the other choice is to hire the doula my mw raves about, in the hopes that spending all the $$$ on her will deter baby from being here when we actually would want to use a doula, and that way baby will show on time.

Until then, I'm going to sleep on it and if I still feel crappy about her in the morning, call my mw and find out what else we can do. I keep thinking of other choices, I found a family practice gal nearby, but my insurance doesn't cover her hospital, and there is a lay midwife an hour away, but I have no clue how much she'd cost and we are in no way prepared for hb right now. Grr!!

Ooh Andy, do you guys have the same storm watch we have? They are saying rain tomorrow and 16+ inches of snow on Thursday, and it's not snow belt snow, just a good storm. Woohoo!

Talked to my mom today too, I honestly hope to follow in her laboring footsteps - I was her longest at 8 hrs, my little brother was only an hour. But with him, she had cramps for 6 weeks prior that got most of the work done. That'd be a nice ending to this nice pregnancy.

Lisa

[fromscatteredtribe]

jess- i am so sorry to hear about your grandma. i told my grandma years agot hat sh eis never allowed to die because i love her way too much. she is in chicago still and it was the worst part of moving here, but i think she is coming to arizona too, and will be living 65 miles away so i'll see her more often anyway. this is a terrible time of year to lose someone you love. again i'm sorry.

been wrapping stocking gifts. we don't do christmas presents for our kids and they are fine with that, but we got them each a few nice little things for stockings.with dh's second job and me selling children's dish sets from ikea on ebay ($50.00 profit this month) it's definitely a better holiday celebration for us. we're happy to get them some paint and balls and flash cards. they were each grateful for a new pair of shoes too, and family spoils them anyway.

my leg hair was black. i am a straight-up brunette naturally (anywhere from green to blonde to blue many times). i am pretty sure if you stopped shaving now, it would turn lighter and softer by summer. if not, you could always shave again. i think if you're patient, it is worth it.

been having tons of contractions (never had bh with other three pregnancies). every time i eat and walk. and lots of other times too. i think i have two more weeks with this one though; maybe not six, but at least two.

[rubysmomjess]

OK am I completely awful or does it annoy anyone else when people want a specific date for when the baby's arriving? My due date is 1/24. Do I really thinK it will happen on 1/24? No... so why say it? What's wrong with just saying the end of January? Are they making plans based on my due date?
(FYI my first was 10 days late according to my due date)

AAAAHHHHHHHHH!

I really have lost my mind. I'm going home now.

Have a good evening all!

Jess

[Malama]

Originally Posted by rubysmomjess

OK am I completely awful or does it annoy anyone else when people want a specific date for when the baby's arriving? My due date is 1/24. Do I really thinK it will happen on 1/24? No... so why say it? What's wrong with just saying the end of January? Are they making plans based on my due date?

You're not the only one Jess. No one but me and my mw friend knows my "due" date. My dh doesn't even know. But I've been pestered PLENTY- and when I say I'm due next month they ALL want to know which date-- a lot it seems want to know if baby will be born on their or some other loved ones birthday- whatever. Only about 5% of babes are born on their EDD anyways....not good odds for planning, IMO.
I'm also so sorry to hear about your grandma. Why did your mom tell you at a party? seems weird.

scattered tribe, I'm jealous of you that your leg hair got lighter with not shaving. I'm a hairy monster but didn't shave for years. But my hair stayed dark, thick, and more abundant than many men I know. I started shaving it again some years ago when I became a LLL Leader- I didn't want moms to not attend our meetings or not nurse into toddlerhood because I looked a certain way- can you tell I have a complex about it? Now I think it's a minor PITA to shave.

lisa- what a bummer about the b/u mw. maybe there's an alternative?? did you know your mw would be vacationing now??

I've been trying to nap this afternoon and the baby is having a party in there, complete with rhythmic hiccups.... how sweet. i guess I'm just gonna give up despite the fact that I was up for the day at 5:45 this am.

[mamabeca]

Karen - we are sailing the same rough seas! My monkey starts to rumba and hiccough every time I get my feet up ! It's slightly annoying, but so is waking up too early, and that wasn't their fault, specifically (ok, the pee thing is related, but the not falling back to sleep part was pretty much just me).

Jess - I'm really sorry about your grandma too. I do wish I still had a grandparent around... and knowing that dh's mom is on her way out is so sad ... one less grandparent for these little ones. sigh. The intergenerational thing is just totally irreplaceable!

On shaving: I shave my pits 'cause I like to. It mostly gives me something to do while the conditioner does its work. Otherwise I start to look for mold in the tiles(eeeeuuuuwwww). that's all I do. Dh doesn't shave much either - he's a hairy bugger! So I guess I feel like it gives me free reign.

Interesting note...if anyone remembers a long while ago I asked about names, and mentioned we were thinking about Reidar (or Ryder) as a name for a boy... well it turns out that the doctor of choice around these parts (low abx, and permissive on no vax) is a Dr. Reider! Well how we gunna name our kid Ryder now!? Can't, in my opinion. Dh still likes it best and hasn't found any other boy name he likes as much. So if anyone has good recomendations, I'm all ears!

Had our mw's over today for a home visit. There is now a hitch. There are two main mw's and one trainee. I love the two, but I don't love the trainee. I just don't get a great vibe off her. I DO love the doula, who is also the massage therapist (not the trainee or mw). She is open and honest, she works hard, she's really great with dd, and she's into being a part of the flow, not the center or the facilitator...just part of making this happen in the best possible way. She's not really included in their world, though...maybe because she's young and has a pretty busy, chaotic world. She's made it clear to me that she really does want to be here, and will come when I call her... So how do I tell the main mw's that I just don't love their choice of apprentice? I'm thinking I'll just keep my trap shut for now, and give her (the trainee), at least, the opportunity of attending the birth itself. I can always tell the mw's during the birth that I would prefer them to do the hands-on work. I don't think they would be at all upset by that. I guess a part of me wants to be kind of selfish and say 'hey - I didn't ask for this person to be at the birth! Back off, honey!' but I don't really feel so strongly that way (or against the trainee) that it would be necessary. any opinions?

On that note, Lisa, I would be honest with your mw and tell her that you REALLY don't like the back up. She may have another name for you, or she may have some other trick up her sleeve to help get over some hurtles... if you don't try, you'll never know!

Jesi - thanks for the knife idea! I'm heading over to the mall tomorrow anyway. I think there's a kitchen type store...maybe I can find dh a knife rack (the kind that go on the wall with a strong magnetic strip...he's mentioned he wants one of those! ) and maybe even a butcher knife to go with it. YEAH!!!

Jess - I feel the SAME way. I'm so SICK of people needing a DATE (my parents are the worst!)...I'm just though because people want to know for their own reasons. It's nothing to do with us or our babies...sort of a bummer, but hey, people can just be selfish sometimes! Even when they think they're doing it to be 'nice'.

tonight I watched a completely :Puke display of x-mas gift crapola! Dd's dance class had this grab bag thing, and it was SO gross! I won't go into details, but I had to spend about 20 minutes after it was over disuading dd that this was a good thing, and why, and NOW we have to live with some horrible bratz doll thing... ugh! 'tis the season!? Give me a BREAK!

I'd better go help dh fix the christmas tree from Pisa in the living room. Fell over twice and we ended up at WAL-MART to get a new stand for it. No place else had one left. 5 stores later, there we are at the self check out buying it and furtively trying to hide behind the register ... with this big ole belly that's a pretty good challenge! LOL! Take care all, andy

[Malama]

Originally Posted by mamabeca

Had our mw's over today for a home visit. There is now a hitch. There are two main mw's and one trainee. I love the two, but I don't love the trainee. I just don't get a great vibe off her. I DO love the doula, who is also the massage therapist (not the trainee or mw). She is open and honest, she works hard, she's really great with dd, and she's into being a part of the flow, not the center or the facilitator...just part of making this happen in the best possible way. She's not really included in their world, though...maybe because she's young and has a pretty busy, chaotic world. She's made it clear to me that she really does want to be here, and will come when I call her... So how do I tell the main mw's that I just don't love their choice of apprentice?

andy- having been there myself.... as the apprentice. it's great if you like the apprentice and feel good about her being there. But if you don't? You absolutely don't have to have her there. Personalities/ energies sometimes clash and this is your one time to birth this child. You can tell the mw(s) that you prefer she doesn't come but that the doula come. i think it's perfectly a reasonable request. When I was apprenticing, the mw i worked with mostly went alone to the 36ish week home visits. That way she could talk to them about who to bring to the births. It only happened a couple of times that i wasn't invited, and usually it was to women's births that i didn't necessarily bond with anyways. I was never hurt by it.

[3_opihi]

Jess - I'm so sorry about your Grandma. That's really sad. Just know she is watching over you and your little one right now

I suppose I'm lucky in the sense that I have blonde hair. I don't really shave anything, except my armpits otherwise I have BO problems.

I've had a super crappy day today. I got no sleep last night, fought with dh this morning. And to make matters even better, I feel like I got punched in the crotch. Don't know what's going on there, but I can barely walk. I can't tell if its just the baby's head resting on my pubic bone, or some sort of vein popping out down there.

We did go to the beach today. That cheered me up a little. Makai just slept the most of the time on the sand, and Kobe collected a bunch of coconuts to chuck into the water. Then, they were dragging all these big logs across the sand, groaning "heave, heave..." It was really funny and cute.

So...here's to a better day tomorrow, and some much needed sleep! Aloha.

Annie

[fromscatteredtribe]

just a possible positive on the midwife realtionship thing. with my first three babies, the two ectopics, and the pregnant breast abcess surgery I was with midwife practices where you didn't know who was going to be there. some of them i loved in the office and some of them i didn't. i wasn't sure how i'd feel with them at my births or surgeries or whatever. the most amazing thing was that the people who seemed the coldest, most distant or difficult to connect with or flighty or annoying or domineering, etc etc were PERFECT at the moment i needed them. some of my friends are great to chat with and agree with me about birth but their presence would not be acceptable at a birth. by the same token, some of the people i don't like are incredibly proficient and perfectly appropriate birthing support. i've been surprised, maybe you will be too.

i still agree with the advice about making your feelings known and restricting assistants you don't like, but who knows????

hope that helps.

[LEAW]

Oooh it's 2am and I'm wide awake. Brain been racing and racing and keeping me up. I even resorted to singing xmas tunes to make my brain focus on something else.

Tribe, that's EXACTLY what I needed to read right now. Talk about a calming breath. If I actually get some sleep, I'm still going to sleep on the midwife thing, and in the meantime, the dog and I are going to see what's on the TiVo.

Started packing my bag today. Well, if you can call it packing. I got out a big bag, put it on the changing table, and tossed in 2 things. I should probably make a real effort at getting that all set, at least today is going to be a quiet day for me.

G'nite, g'morning,
Lisa

[stacey31]

Hi All......
I cannot lay in bed one more minute because my back pain makes me want to scream!!! I feel so close to birth & yet so far, KWIM?? Technically Ihave a little over 2 weeks to go. Mentally & physically I feel like it will be sooner. If I can just get thru Christmas & play Santa to my kids, I will be OK.

I still have a lot of anxiety about this birth. I become a wreck just thinking about it & fot the first time in my life I really know what panic & anxiety feel like. It's an awful feeling & I am not sure I can get my head together before labor starts. The MW assures me that this happnes a lot & that things will work out regardless.

Yesterday I went to shop a little & I am just so huge & I lumber around the stores having to pee every 5 minutes....I must be a sight!:LOL Eventually I gave up & came back empty handed. DH says he will pick up whatever I need which seems like a better choice right now.

I cannot believe we are all still here! I look at the roll call everyday wondering if any new babes have arrived......Hope everyone has a great week & a beautiful Christmas should you celebrate!

[mamabeca]

Hey Stacey - I just looked at your ofoto album, you sure have one fine looking family! Joe is a hunk! Whew... That said, what's the birth anxiety about? You are a pro at this, so there must be something 'up', like 4 kids so CLEARLY outnumbers the adults, or the birth plan, or something... My rec. is to write about it (to us or journal...doens't matter) and get the thoughts sorted out before attempting the next phase of coping. I'm sorry to hear about the pain, it sounds like quite a few of us are having that (Az, you, Jessi).
I did get a natural remedy for indigestion - star anise tea. I bought some star anise in bulk, I'm supposed to make an infusion and then reheat the tea as needed. I'll let you know how it goes... have a great day! Andy

[JesiLynne]

So far, I lost my mucus plug Sat. afternoon, had contractions Sat. NIght. They stopped at 2 am
Monday night at 11pm they started again.
Stopped at 1 am


I am so tired of "almost being there"
I get so excited and then nothing
I just wanna see my baby, I am sick of peeing everytime I start a project, or can't stop a project.

Anybody else's head itch LIKE CRAZY??????????
I feel like I should have some bug living up there it itches so bad, but I don't???????????????????????????

[pixiexto]

Stacey, I'm sorry you're feeling so much anxiety. I sometimes go through bouts where I think "Now how the heck did I do THAT??" when I think about birth, but I am making a point of visualizing a beautiful, relaxing labor and wonderful birthing ~ with as many details as I can pack in there! I also think about how our bodies really are meant to do this, and I have faith that mine will "remember" what to do when the time comes & the rest will follow suit.

Jesi, WOW! That's so exciting! I can imagine how eager you must feel It looks like it could be right around the corner for you!

Mamabeca, I look forward to hearing about the star anise tea! That sounds great. I'm sorry to hear that you didn't feel so great about the apprentice. You know, before we moved down South I'd made arrangements to begin care with my midwife from DD's birth, and got the surprise that she has a midwifery student with her this year. Well, let's just say this girl was NOT someone I would have been comfortable with attending our birth; actually, I wasn't even sure I'd be keen on her attending my prenatals! She was very prim and came across as quite arrogant, lecturing me on being a Vegetarian and on how terribly risky it was to continue to breastfeed my then 21 month old DD during this pregnancy! YUCK! I had decided to not sign the agreement for her to participate, as I felt strongly that it would be a negative experience for me. I think if you feel this way, there is nothing wrong at all with standing up and saying "no way!"
On the other hand, scattered tribe's response was a bit more positive and hopeful than mine.

Mamamaya, sorry yesterday was so rough! The beach sounds like it was paradise I hope today is a whole lot better.

Karen, I couldn't agree more about the whole EDD thing! My mom still will ask me "soooo, is your midwife still going with the Jan26 date?" First, what on Earth impact on the timing of the birth would it have whether my midwife is "going" with a date or not, and second who cares???? I wish I'd NEVER mentioned a date at all! (mental note socked away for next time )



I finally took some belly pics yesterday! I'm very into b&w lately, so forgive me

http://www.sassymama.ca/stuffola/almost35_1border.jpg
http://www.sassymama.ca/stuffola/almost35_2border.jpg
http://www.sassymama.ca/stuffola/almost35_3border.jpg

[LEAW]

Ack, too many midwife problems - I think Andy was the one with the apprentice, I'm the one who doesn't like the backup and my midwife whom I love and adore is leaving Sat. night and returning from vacation 12 hours before I'm due. Not that due dates mean much, but I've really been giving my belly pep talks about staying warm until then! Turns out my MW actually has 6 scheduled inductions and one girl who is 10 days late to deliver this week. So glad babe is staying warm and isn't part of that crazy mess!

So I let the emotional part of my brain keep me up all night thinking about the backup and how we didn't get the warm and fuzzies from her. Then the rational part got to take over this morning, and I know my mw wouldn't pick her as backup if she weren't very good at her job and able to do what we need.

Andy, how's the weather? It's snowing here again, pretty hard and heading your way! The weather guru says 16" for us before tomorrow evening. Dh is planning on work being closed tomorrow, and he's off Friday, and all next week. He's rather excited about a snow day.

Breakfast, then I have to drive downtown, which is always an adventure. Especially when people can't remember how the cars work in the snow.

Belly pics - ooh I took some the other night using the mirror for help, and even got dh to put them on the computer downstairs, but of course I have no clue what folder he put them in. I'll have to post some.

Lisa

[mamabeca]

Hey sly - WHAT A BELLY! Amazing... you are one beautiful mama! Get yours up there Lisa! I can't wait for more snow. I'd really like nothing more than to sit around, blow some snow, watch a vid, drink some cocoa. Snuggle with dd and dh... it's cold today, but warmer than tues or mon., which is somewhat nice...about 20 degrees.

Both my mw's are gone until about new years, which is ok. Dh and I watched one of the LOTR DVD's last night and I spent the whole time trying to get the baby to turn. and I DID! It took me like an hour to figure out which was head and which was tail, but once I got that worked out (which I think I did...) I got them to turn quite nicely. Whether they're STILL head down is another issue all together. I'm not feeling the 'feathery brushes' against my cervix, but I am feeling kicks in my upper right rib area (or an elbow...) and also a big hard part along my left side...back maybe? I've made chocolate chip cookies three times in two days (supposedly for dd but I eat them all!), and I have GOT to stop. carrots just don't hold the same Yumm factor... sigh. caio! andy

Hey Jesi - just hang in there. The first mama mystery is how little control we have over the whole pregnancy/birth process. The universe is in charge, and it RARELY screws up. Just breathe through the need... and get some exercise. I hear that it helps during 'the wait'. And may help you sleep better, meantime, too.