hi mamas! wow, we have some babies getting ready to show up. and some that are getting ready to get ready to show up! oh, and stacy, what a cute smiley baby!! beautiful family pics...you too, bv, thanks for posting those, what a great family!
i had a thought, that kate, you may've thought of too, being a first timer. i was wondering about post partum. we talk about pg (up), and birth (uc)...but what about after the baby is here: upp? i mean, maybe it's pretty basic-- you stare and are in awe, you sleep, you breastfeed, bleed, maybe cramp, keep baby warm, eat placenta, eat food, drink water...is there anything i'm missing? like, one thought i had is with breastfeeding. i know about feeding on demand, but with a newborn is it better to wake them up to feed rather than them waking up from crazy-hunger for the first time in this body--do they get so hungry that it's hard to latch on? is post-partum just something that happens and it's fine to go with it vs. learning about it ahead of time? i just don't even know, all my friends have had midwives who checked on them and held the info in their heads so they didn't need to. it seems like it'll be simple after the birth, but i just thought i'd ask, since i might be missing something in the simplicity and not realize it.
as for telling family/others, we've been able to tell some friends that we knew would be supportive. everyone else we're telling that we've decided that the pregnancy feels really personal/private and we're not going to be sharing out prenatal/birthing plans. we're still discussing if we're going to tell them after the birth. i don't want to deal with their fears with the next pregnancy, since then they'd know we'd be freebirthing, but dh seems to want to sing it loud and sing it proud! also, what i've found helpful is that even though our due date is the end of march, we're saying late spring. that is the latest we'd go if we went 44 weeks, so i figure it's not a total lie. and after how dh's family acted with our wedding (controlling, trying to make it look like a traditional wedding anywhere they could), i have no problem telling them why we told them what we did after the fact. but, since this is our 1st, we just don't know what to expect, so we're trying to be really vague and only be around supportive people.
oh, speaking of that, i remembered a question, for the group and for kate. have you thought of asking some of the mamas here who've already uc'd to be on a phone list for during the birth? i'm wondering if it would be helpful, even if it's not used, to have someone who's birthed, much less uc'd to call and say "am i ok?!", or to know that if you needed to call them, you could? i'm trying to heed the advice and prepare for the intensity that people say cause 1st timers to transfer. my uc-supportive mw friend, said that 2 mw's she knows planned to freebirth and both transferred b/c they weren't prepared for the intensity. she offerred this advice: dh should be prepared that if you get to the point that you just don't think you can do it (she tried to avoid using the word 'transition' and said some women don't experience it) and it's just too much, that dh should say, "good! that means the baby is almost here! you're doing great!" she had alot of great advice...very supportive and helpful.
mama2lennon~sending you strength and courage vibes. i wish i could be there to help you. remember that this baby you're carrying has his/her own wisdom and path to walk and the birth will be perfect, and just as he/she needs it to be. you are a strong, wise woman, and i'm sorry that this challenge is coming right now. maybe you can do some things ahead of time, or as labor starts, like setting out drinks with bendy straws, and small snacks whereever you may labor. maybe the birth will be too short to need them. the baby will attract to it what's needed for it's birth. i'm keeping gentle, perfect birth thoughts for you.