Help! I'm in "Nee-Nee" H-E-Double Hockey Sticks!

[mommatonoah]

Ok, maybe it's not THAT bad.

Ladies, I am just so frustrated. I'm all about CLW, but my 18 mos old is really testing me. For about the last month or so I have noticed that he has become really attached to me, literally. I cannot be in the same room with him without him hanging on my leg crying "nee-nee"! I don't ever sit down (unless to nurse). No kidding either..I can't sit down. If my rear hits a chair his radar goes off and he wants nee-nee. I can't even count the number of times a day he nurses.

Tonight I sat on the couch to read a few pages in my new book while dh played with the kids in the other room. I got about two paragraphs into it and guess who wanted nee-nee. And that is not even the bad part. He throws himself into me, which tends to hurt after a while. He smacks my face while nursing (along with the evil grin) and then wants to be up and down. Tonight he was up to nurse (for about 2 minutes each time) and down again about 6 times in a half hour! Not to mention boob-nastics (our word for nursing gymnastics).

He wakes 2-3 times a night too, but that is nothing new.

I don't mean to whine and complain, really. I just feel so frustrated and then feel so bad when I feel that way. Is this just a phase they go through at this age? Some days I really feel like throwing in the towel, but deep down I don't want to. I felt especially thankful for EBF last week when he was sick and he was getting that good healing momma milk.

I guess I just needed to hear from other mommas who may have been there. None of my friends nurse for much longer than 6 months so they just don't understand.

Well, thanks in advance!

Hugs,

[AmyY]

My girls do this too. They also have a variation on the smack-mommy-on-the-head that involves attempting to pick my nose or poke me in the eye. Also, Annika waits until Alicia pulls off for a second and then dives over to Alicia's side until Alicia screams at her and tries to hit/push her off.

I haven't met anyone who nursed in toddlerhood that didn't have this happen. Clinginess and nursing - along with independence.

[katja]

Well, I can't offer any advice, just sympathy. DD is 19 months and all I ever hear is "boo-tee boo-tee." You're right about the sitting down. Maybe I'll try standing more LOL! DD tries to pull on my bottom teeth while nursing. Anyhow I'm just trying to be patient and hope that someday she'll let up a little.

[eminer]

Originally Posted by mommatonoah

Is this just a phase they go through at this age?

Yes. I promise it will go away. For mine it did before she turned 2 (ETA: I mean significantly before she turned 2! Like maybe 20-21 mos).

The best way to deal with it is to use your toddler's picture to set up one of those computer games where you can squish their face in various ways. OR you can just squint and position your fingers on the visual edges of his head, from where you are, and tell him, "I'm squishing your head! I'm squishing your head!" Once he is old enough to understand what this means, he might get upset and need to nurse. :-)

(Please no one call CPS. I'm kidding, really. Ok so I do occasionally tell her I'm squishing her head...)

[TiredX2]

The best way to deal with it is to use your toddler's picture to set up one of those computer games where you can squish their face in various ways. OR you can just squint and position your fingers on the visual edges of his head, from where you are, and tell him, "I'm squishing your head! I'm squishing your head!" Once he is old enough to understand what this means, he might get upset and need to nurse. :-)

I think most toddlers go through a stage between 17-21 months (some for a short time, some the whole time) where they nurse like (really huge acrobatic) newborns. It *will* go down, I promise.

That said, I think that 18 months is old enough to begin encouraging respectful nursing--- if it is something that really bothers you (tweaking, pinching, scratching, pulling, etc...) you can work together to get to a place you both enjoy nursing.

Good luck, that age is just really needy but there is a good chance you will have a "real" TALKER when you're done!!! (it seems like kids increase or, oddly enough severely decrease, their nursing when they are about to do something "big"--- developing that two year old talk seems to be associated w/the increase around 18 months.

[Rox5266]

My 17 month has also become a "boobie-monster." He always comes over to me when I am sitting down and pulls up my shirt and nurses standing up. Sometimes he will stop nursing but keep one hand pinching my nipple-ouch! I am glad to hear this is a phase he may grow out of. I always planned to CLW but sometimes his constant demands can be exasperating!


Roxanne
Daniel 8/9/03

[PajamaMama]

It's reassuring to read that you are all going through this too. I just told a friend of mine today that I feel like I can't sit down without my 19 month old daughter wanting "maamaa".

She tries to stick her fingers up my nose and to poke my eyes too. I have found that if I start humming the Barney song in a sort of loud and irritating way, she will get angry at me and stop the annoying behavior.

Jill

[eminer]

Originally Posted by PajamaMama

I have found that if I start humming the Barney song in a sort of loud and irritating way, she will get angry at me and stop the annoying behavior.

: I have to write this down for next time!

[Embee]

One more for the "this too shall pass" column. I remember 18 months to 2 years as being one of "THOSE" nursing periods for sure. He's been through some since, but not to that intensity for sure. Honestly, I found it just all around easier to "nunny" when he needed and if I really needed a break I left DS with DH and left the house for a while... a long while if need be. Breathe in... breathe out...

The best and hang in there!

[Embee]

Oh, I almost forgot. DS tries to pick my nose more often than he does his own. :

[mommatonoah]

Thank you!

First of all, I apologize for not returning to this thread sooner to thank you all for your time in responding. I live in North East PA and we had a heck of an ice storm on Thursday...lost power and my cable modem. We are all back on now, but there are places one road over who still have no power!

Anyhow, I just wanted to say how much better I feel now having read all of your replies. I guess I just needed to know that I'm not the only one. Somehow it makes it easier to deal with.

TiredX2 - I do believe you may be right in thinking he's ready to burst verbally. I have noticed that his vocabulary seems to be increasing daily.

Thanks again!

[IncaMama]

nak
i am so with you. mine's 21mo...i'm with you.

[thismama]

I'm lmao reading some of these stories.

I too have a crazy nursing toddler. Her current thing is she wants my boob all the way out when nursing, so she is always pushing my shirt waaaaaay up, no matter where we are. And she likes to grab the other one while nursing, so she stuffs her hand up my shirt and tries to lift up my whole shirt.

Also I can't put them "away" while she is looking, even if she is not nursing, or she will start screaming. So I have to sit there with my boob out until she looks away, then scramble to get my shirt down and my bra done up before she looks back. :

[Ary99]

I remember those days all too well. My DS is now 29 months (where did the time go???) and after two his need to nurse down shifted considerably. I remember thinking I didn't know how much longer I'd be able to stand it, but not being able to bear the alternative. He's down to twice a day, just before nap and just before bed. I realized today that for the very first time in 29 months, my right breast has not been nursed on. I've always had a lower supply on that side and I think he's fed up(if you'll pardon the pun) with it. He just wanted the left side today.

Teething was soooo uncomfortable for my son and he teethed forEVER. This could be one of the causes of your child's super clinginess. Sitting down is a big cue for lot of kids, so on your feet if you want a break from boobienastics (thanks for the laugh)

Hilary

Hang in there! It does getting

[Squinkymom]

Here's another face in the crowd. I am so happy to read your post. I am THERE with you, ladies. DS is 19.9 mos old and I am reaching the end of my rope too. I've been really worried lately about how I'm going to make it, and if this is temporary or a permanent change. Clingy, obsessed with boobies, climbing all over me, pinching, grabbing, shirt-pulling, constant night waking, ARGH!

So glad to know that a) I'm not alone out here and b) seems to be a normal developmental thing. Hope you're feeling better about it too!

[QDB]

20 mo ds here and I with you all! In fact I am not sleeping next to him now b/c he drove me up the nursing wall today - needed some MDC time :>

This thread is JUST what I needed.

Earlier tonight he was twiddling my right nipple with his foot! Nurt! Nurt! Oth Side! Are his favorite words :>

I suppose we will miss it when they stop, eh?

[katiecat]

Oh yes, I remember it well. DS was never quite so, um, rough as some of your dc but he definitely went through that clingy needing to nurse every 5 seconds phase starting about 19 months. It lasted for a while but all our phases seem to last longer than everyone elses.

Allison
ds 5/8/02

[Lula's Mom]

OR you can just squint and position your fingers on the visual edges of his head, from where you are, and tell him, "I'm squishing your head! I'm squishing your head!" Once he is old enough to understand what this means, he might get upset and need to nurse. :-)

eminer, did you used to watch a lot of Kids in the Hall? :LOL

[Ravin]

Weaning wouldn't help. A friend of mine who didn't breastfeed had her DD1 go thru a very clingy/demanding stage too. She'd screetch "Joo! Joo!" until given a sippy of juice, and was very mommy-clingy. For a while juice and her morning baby cereal were about all she took in. At least you don't have to worry about "nee nee" preventing balanced nutrition!

[BrettsMama]

I am so there with you! Brett is still going through this at 23.5 months, although I think we are starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel! But for the longest, I could NOT sit without nursing him. And ditto the mama who has to put it away when baby's not looking! He also does the constant night waking, etc. It can be frustrating but the thing I like least is what you called "Boob-nastics." Oh. My. Gosh. It's like his head stays stationary but that's the only thing! He's constantly flopping, moving, turning, etc.

I don't have much advice except just muddle through, day by day. And you can set boundaries, as mentioned, so that nursing isn't so uncomfy. I had to really start setting boundaries on the flipping/flopping because it was hurting so much. It does get better, though, so I'm told!