5 yrs old and kissin' boys!! YIKES!

[dizzy23]

so i picked my 5 yo dd up from kindergarten today and we're chattin' on the way home about how the morning went. she tells me about an art project and dance and a book she read, and "oh, yeah, mama, i kissed a boy today". oh yeah? so i asked her where she kissed him and she said, "in class!" and i said did you kiss him on the cheek and she said, "duh! that's where you give boys kisses!" so we laughed and i thought it was very cute and funny.
my dh came home for lunch, and as i'm tellin him the story and i'm gigglin, his face starts to drop. he clearly did not think it was very cute and funny. i asked him what was up, and he said,"she's so young. this shouldn't be happening so young. i don't want her to be one of those girls that all the guys say, 'oh, yeah, ask her out, she'll be ALOT of fun'".
this thought did not even cross my mind. but now the question arises. how do we walk the line between not wanting her to be sexually repressed yet, also, wanting to prevent a "bad reputation" or premature sexual exploration. how can we nurture the natural rhythms of her body in a healthy, safe manner?
it was all such a taboo subject in the household i grew up in, that i really don't have an example to look back on. any input would be great. thanks!

[Pynki]

WEll, i have to tell you my mom got a call from my kindergarten teacher because I was kissing boys AND pinching thir bottoms... I thought it was fun to chase them, or to catch them when they weren't looking and kiss them... Perhaps it's more of a game than anything else it was for me...

However after my mother got that call it did SORT of curtail my activities.. (it was the butt pinching they minded ) I was not one of those girls you went out with to have a good time with in high school. (that part of my life came MUCH later, and i still don't think anyone ever thought of me that way anyway.)

I wouldn't worry about it too much.. You might ask your daughter WHY she wanted to kiss they boy.. See what comes up from there... Ask her if she kissed any boys today... See what her reason is behind it...

Like i said though, i wouldn't worry about it too much... The girls i knew who were really a good time for the guys didn't really come from the healthiest home, and they were looking for something and thought that would be how to get it...

Best of Luck and like i said, probably no need to worry...

[mrzmeg]

I agree--I wouldn't worry about it. At 5, not only was I kissing boys, but I was the leader of a "gang" of girls on the playground called The Kissy Girls. As I remember it, we chased down boys and kissed them (on their cheeks, naturally). Fun times .
But none of that was sexual at all. I don't think any of us could have comprehended sex at that age and it never entered our mind. To us, it was just a game, and kissing was no more sexual than playing tag.
None of my friends from this group grew up to be notoriously promiscuous. I really don't think that there is a link. Kissing at a young age is more about exploring relationships and playing around than anything else, IMO.

[menudo]

Do we have the SAME daughter?!?! The second week of Kindergarten (2 weeks ago) DD got off the bus BEAMING! She says, "Mom, I got to tell you something! I Kisseda BOY!" AHHHH!! so we discussed it and SHE initiated it, it was in the bus, on the cheek and HE told her to try the lips and she said "No way!" LMAO The yalso planned a weeding (her preschool wedding fell through...) and it's been a few days since I heard about it!

[dizzy23]

thanks for the replies - funny! as with everything in raising these girls, the kissin phase is passing for the moment. dd informed me a couple days ago that she was sick of the kissin chase game and tired if being called 'kissy girl'. 'i'm not doin it any more! '
i know dh will be glad that dd's long term reputation is no longer comprimised by her kindergarten affairs - ha!ha!

[3boysmom]

As the mom of three boys, I feel the need to say that a lot of girls seem to go through the "kissy" phase. However, most boys do not. I think that it is important to point this out to your daughters so that they can be sure that the boys in question are actually enjoying the attention. It can be very traumatic for a small boy to be the object of this kind of attention, especially daily. If the boy seems uncomfortable with it, it should stop. Many boys are too embarrassed to complain to a parent or teacher so feel they must just endure, or they get fed up and end up punching the girl and they get into trouble. Just another point of view.