Non-medicated delivery by choice-why? - Page 4

[Kirsten]

I think many of the moms here touched on what really made the difference for me - the attitude and subsequent fear or dreading of the birth experience. If you ask, the majority of moms who went natural (those who planned and wanted to go natural - and did) think it was the most wonderful, powerful, peaceful, touching experience they have ever gone through. Not just the end product of holding your sweet baby, but being able to enjoy/appreciate the entire process. It was so nice to be able to be in any position, not hooked up to anything - no IV, nothing. Just simple and peaceful and yes, challenging at times but as previous posters said - felt like you could do it all over again the minute it was over. Was so wonderful to feel positive about it and not fear the next birth.

[Anglyn]

Ok, well I had two hospital births, one with demerol in the IV drip and one with an epidural then I had an all natural with my third, in a birthing center with a midwife. All of the reasons listed here are the reasons I chose it. DD had meconium staining and Im guessing caused by fetal distress caused by the epi (though there were no signs of it and no proof, but somethng caused it). And afterwards he was so much more alert and he nursed right away (dd took weeks to get to nurse properly). No pitocin, no IV. The baby never left my side, he was awake and alert, I went home three hours after birth. THe midwife came to my house for the two day checkup. I could get up and walk. I had tons of attention and help afterwards (the hospital staff abandoned me due to them being swamped that day with births and then I had to pee but still couldnt really walk yet). So yes, all the reasons I wanted the natural birth were right and good. But I never experinaced pain like that and I never got that endorphine rush other women talk about, I never felt more alive or in touch with other women or any of that. I was wishing like heck I had an epi availible. Now, after the fact, Im glad I didnt. But right after birth, I had envisioned nursing him right away and instead I just wanted to be left alone with my feelings of intense relief that it was over.

Maybe I should have learned some kind of pain relief techniques other than just the breathing. Immediatley after I felt better than I did with my hospital births, the tear healed up with almost no pain, and my after contractions werent near as bad (from no pitocin?) but two days later I was tired, I felt like somehad had beat my entire body with a bat. I dont want to ever go through that again. But knowing what I do I dont know if I could have an epi either, which leaves me almost not wanting the fourth and last baby that we had planned on having. Maybe with more time, ds is only three weeks old right now. I want the epi for myself, but then feel guilty thinking about the effects on the baby.

Reading everyone elses responses makes me wonder what the heck went wrong, why I didnt experiance it like everyone else seems to have.

[Quindin]

Anglyn, I would like to comment on your post

You wrote:
But I never experinaced pain like that and I never got that endorphine rush other women talk about, I never felt more alive or in touch with other women or any of that.I was wishing like heck I had an epi availible. Now, after the fact, Im glad I didnt.

(...)


Reading everyone elses responses makes me wonder what the heck went wrong, why I didnt experiance it like everyone else seems to have.



I just wanted to tell you that I never got that endorphine rush either - the pain is just beyond anything I can explain and when I thought I was about to die, the pushing phase started. I also begged for epi every time, and this is one of the reasons why I prefer to give birth where there is NO epi available just to make sure I won't get it

As I said in a PP, I tried birthing both with and without Epi - though the EPi made birth painless I would not do it again.

I definetely do not believe that if you went through a lot of pain during labor that means you did something wrong. Not at all But births are as different as women are, and nobody can predict how the experience will be like for her. My aunt for example never felt ANYTHING, while I did ,despite of all exercises, changing positions, breathing techniques and support from the midwives - and that does mean something went wrong

And no wonder you don't know whether you want to have another baby or not - you gave birth 3 weeks ago lady!! You're still recovering and the memories are too fresh still. The good news is that when the baby craving kicks in, nature makes most women forget about most of the pain.

That's why I am sitting here 36 weeks pregnant waddling in pain most of the time - and I have already done it 3 times :LOL I somehow forget every time :LOL I just can't wait to hold a new little one in my arms after all is done though

So what I am trying to say is: You're not alone !!!

[Full Heart]

I've done it both ways. I much prefer the unmed route. Having given birth med free at home the first time I knew what I was missing out the 2nd time. My baby had a terrible time latching on after the birth. I had to be cathed because I couldn't feel to pee. I couldn't move on my own so if I had to roll over for shoulder dystocia I couldn't, or squat to bring the baby down, or anything involving moving my lower body.

I have had un med terrible horrific labors too. #4 was so painful I forgot I was giving birth. I asked my dh to kill me. I have had normal natural labor where I seriously couldn't see what the big deal was and other wow this is really really hard work. I've experienced it all. So for me, pg with #6 what has me coming back to an unmed homebirth is simple, Its better for the baby. I know I could go through another type of labor where I want to die. There is that chance anytime I give birth. But because I have been through it I know I can do it. Does it scare me? yes. terrifies me. But so does the chain of interventions that usually occur at the hospital from epis. I fear not having control of my birth more than the pain. I fear for my child more than the pain. And that ultimatly is what keeps me med free. Its something I struggle with though everytime.

Michelle

[Anglyn]

Thank you! I need to hear that! I figure I'll have better perspecrtive once some time goes by. With the epi, since I didnt feel it, I was ready right after birth for the next one! Of course, its not just the birth, its having a three week old and a twenty month old, Im exhausted!

[ShadowMom]

Originally Posted by polihaupt

I definetely do not believe that if you went through a lot of pain during labor that means you did something wrong. Not at all But births are as different as women are, and nobody can predict how the experience will be like for her. My aunt for example never felt ANYTHING, while I did ,despite of all exercises, changing positions, breathing techniques and support from the midwives - and that does mean something went wrong

I think there's also a little revisionist history going on sometimes with birth experiences. Our memory of how it was really like gets clouded by the endorphin rush of how wonderful it is for it all to be over, and to now have a beautiful baby in our arms.

[annethcz]

I had an epidural with my first, and I still feel guilty about it. The drugs did indeed reach him, and he was sleepy and lethargic for the first few days of his life. We had quite a few struggles with nursing and getting him to stay awake long enough to eat.

Most pregnant woman avoid drugs during pregnancy because of their affect on the baby. Why should that change at the end of pregnancy?

Believe me, I'm no glutton for punishment. And in general, I'm a complete wimp when it comes to pain. If it was all about me, I would get the drugs in a second. But it's not just about me. The drugs will also affect the tiny little person I'm bringing into the world. And I don't think that drugged, dazed & confused is a good way to start off in life.

[Quindin]

Originally Posted by polihaupt

and that does mean something went wrong

Ooops.. I meant "That does NOT mean something went wrong"