On December 30th I had my last appointment with our midwife at her place. The plan was to do an internal exam to see how dilated my cervix was, if at all, since I’d been getting false labor contractions for a couple weeks up to that point. We arrived at 6:15 pm and she did the usual things- checked my blood pressure, pulse, and so forth, and then we went on to do the exam. I was 3-4 cm dilated already, and 60% effaced, which was great news! While she was doing the exam she applied some evening primrose oil to my cervix to help it continue getting ready for the big day, and then she measured my stomach and listened to the baby’s heartbeat. After everything was seen as healthy and normal, Aaron (my husband), Deb (the midwife) and I chatted for a short time while Josiah (our son) played with some trucks on the floor. While we were talking Deb mentioned that, the night before she had her third daughter, she felt different, like things were surreal. This was brought up because that entire day I was pretty lenient with Josiah (What, you want Cheetos with breakfast? Okay, that’s fine) and didn’t really care too much what he did or how healthily he ate, which was not normal for myself. At any rate, after we finished up Aaron, Josiah and I went home. We put Josiah to bed and stayed up for a short while chatting about random topics and then we decided to turn in as well.
I woke up around 2:00 am on December 31st to use the bathroom and when I climbed back in bed I couldn’t get comfortable. After tossing and turning for a few minutes, I was laying on my back, halfway through rolling over again when I felt the baby’s head turn inside me and ‘POP’ went my bag of waters! I had only enough time to tell Aaron to grab the towel at the foot of the bed before everything started rushing out of me, and after completely soaking 4 towels I seemed to finally stop leaking. Aaron brought me the phone and I called Deb at 2:15 am to let her know my water bag broke and she told me to call back when contractions were 5 to 7 minutes apart. We got off the phone and I started climbing out of bed. Suddenly I leaked more fluid and soaked Aaron’s side of the bed (which still makes me chuckle!) and then could do nothing but stand at the side of the bed until I was finished leaking. Suddenly contractions started- not painful ones, but definitely stronger than the false labor ones I’d been getting for so long. I got downstairs and by 2:30 was back calling Deb because contractions were only 3 minutes apart. She said she was on her way and hung up the phone as Aaron and I were excitedly chatting about the baby finally coming- and on time for a tax deduction.
Deb and her assistant Katie arrived around 3:30 and I could feel the excitement in the air- and the rapidly increasing aches with each contraction.
At 4:00 am I called my friend Teresa, who was to come and keep Josiah occupied while I was laboring, and I let her know it was the big day and to come over by 5:00 in case Josiah awoke earlier than his usual 6:00 am. Contractions began to get stronger and more difficult and, right as Teresa arrived at 5:00, I felt like true labor had begun. I spent most of my time laboring on all fours and rocking back and forth, kneeling on the bed and leaning on whoever was nearest me when a contraction hit and, eventually, laying on my right side because I became so tired I need to rest between contractions as much as I possibly could. I found side-lying to be pretty uncomfortable as far as labor positions go, but more comfortable between contractions than any other position I tried. An internal exam was done at this point and I was sitting around 5 to 6 cm dilated and 75% effaced which, although it sounded to me like I’d made no progress, it was actually going pretty well. Josiah had awaken around 5:30 am and came into the room to see why so many people were there and why Mommy was making funny noises. During one contraction he asked Teresa, “Sad?” and no one heard or understood what he was saying. When the contraction subsided I looked at him and said, “No honey, Mommy’s not sad, Mommy’s having the baby.” Then he seemed okay with it and went off to have breakfast and watch a little television with Teresa while I continued to labor.
Now, throughout a good portion of my labor I had insisted that cold washcloths be put on the back of my neck and my lower back because I kept getting so hot and anyone whose hands were remotely warm could not touch me because it felt so irritating to my body, but it was at this point that I suddenly wanted to get into the birthing tub’s warm water and let it help relax me and take some weight and pressure off my body. I climbed in the tub, with some help of course, and it felt really nice on my skin. Contractions were getting quite difficult at this point and I found myself moaning with each one. Josiah kept coming into the hallway where the tub was once in a while to see what mommy was doing and, occasionally, he would put out his arms and say “hug” when the contraction had subsided. Of course, I’d lean my head on him and let him hug me, since I was in no position to get up and hug him, and then we’d have kisses, and then he’d run off and go play some more while I labored some more. Sometimes he’d touch the water in the birthing tub and someone would remind him not to touch it since Mommy really needed it and he was pretty good about it, and he’d keep playing in the other room. After a while I felt that I needed to go to the bathroom so we got me out of the tub, dried off, and on the toilet, which didn’t really help me very much. I went back into the bedroom and went back and forth from hot to freezing until we finally found a good temperature to keep the room at, and I continued to labor on my right side, all the while complaining that I felt like I was going to be sick. They got me a bowl but I never threw up, and after a while they helped me roll onto my left side. Now that the bowl wasn’t in front of me anymore, I threw up on the bed. Go figure! I felt much better though, even though it made the next contraction feel impossible to deal with. Anyway, Deb said she wanted to check me again and see where I’d progressed to, so between contractions she did a really fast exam and found me to be at about 9 cm. It was encouraging to hear that because labor was really intense at this point and I just wanted everything to be over and done with! After trying and trying to find a comfortable position, I finally started pushing a little bit with some contractions- and felt like nothing was happening. After what I think was about 2 hours (which was probably more like 1 hour or so) it appeared I was making no progress so Deb did another exam- and I was still at 9 cm. It turned out that the baby’s head was cocked to one side ever-so-slightly, and it was preventing my cervix from dilating that last centimeter. She suggested I get on one knee and put the other one up and out to the side during contractions to try and help the baby into the position she needed to be in. I tried and it felt impossible to do- I just wanted to squat and lean forward instead because it was easier to deal with the pain, but I knew I had to shift the baby or else I’d be dealing with pain for a lot longer than I’d need to.
I ended up getting back into the birthing tub and with each contraction Aaron held my body up in his arms so I could do what I needed to do with my legs. It was at this point around 10:00 am or so, that Josiah was laid down for a nap and quickly fell asleep. About 12 to 15 contractions later I felt the need to go to the bathroom again and started pushing because I didn’t care anymore about using the stupid toilet, I hurt like hell and just wanted to be finished! I started pushing and after that first contraction where I pushed Deb asked me to reach inside my body and see if I could feel the baby’s head, which I couldn’t. The next contraction hit and I felt I had to push- I didn’t even have to try, I just did it automatically, screaming the entire time. After the contraction subsided I reached inside my body and this time I was able to feel the top of the baby’s head. Progress was being made, which was exciting as well as relieving, and I let Deb know that the baby was as far up as the length of my middle finger, or about 3 inches. The next contraction hit and I started pushing and screaming again when, all of a sudden, I felt the baby crowning- and no one was prepared for it! I shouted, “The baby’s head is coming out!” and Deb came over by my side and tried to reach under me and let me know she couldn’t reach where she needed to. Aaron was still helping me by holding my body up and I remember just flipping my body around so that, instead of facing outside the pool, I was almost facing the inside. I could hear Deb telling me to slow down my pushing, to give little pushes and to breathe more and I tried my best to do what she said to, since I knew it was important so I wouldn’t tear, or at least not severely. A few seconds later I felt the head deliver and Deb said, “Okay, you’ve birthed the head…and…here‘s your baby!” I had continued pushing and next thing you know, I’m holding a gooey purple baby in my arms.
Yes, purple- her heart rate was a little low and she was having trouble breathing at first, but after a quick rubdown she was fine. The umbilical cord was a little short so I couldn’t sit down yet (or else the baby would have gone under the water) but the water- and Aaron- were still holding me up, so it was fine. After Aaron cut the cord I passed off the baby to the assistant, Aaron, and Teresa, and Deb took care of me. We sat chatting about what had just happened as we waited for my body to expel the placenta. I couldn’t believe I had actually done it without any anesthesia and admitted that, if I hadn’t been delivering at home, I would have caved and gotten the epidural, so I was glad that I wasn’t at a hospital. It felt like to took forever to birth the placenta (probably because I was antsy to hold the baby again!) and finally Deb did a little cord tugging while I pushed on my abdomen from the outside and then it came out just fine. Teresa and Deb helped me out of the tub while Aaron and Katie worked with the baby and looked her over to see that everything was normal. I went and laid down on the bed and my own body was checked out for tears and cuts and bruising. I didn’t tear although I did bruise my perineum a little bit, and I was shaking really badly because of all the different hormones coursing through my body, so I was being covered with blankets and towels- anything dry- and finally I got to see my baby again. She started nursing right away and drifted off to sleep shortly after.
She was born at 10:51 am on December 31st, weighed 8 pounds and was 21 inches long. Aaron and I named her Talia Jordyn. I remember thanking Teresa for being there for me and especially for Josiah, and then she went home soon afterward. When Josiah woke up from his nap he came into the bedroom and saw me and the baby. He looked at me and I said “Hi, honey.” She looked at the baby and I asked him, “What’s Mommy holding?” He said, “Baby?” I said, “Yeah, Mommy’s holding our baby. Can you say Talia?” “Yeah, baby,” and then he leaned over and gave her a kiss to welcome her to the family. I later found out that, during one of the contractions, as I was rocking back and forth in the tub, he was outside the tub mimicking me, also rocking back and forth, and I recall having heard him imitating my panting once in a while as he was walking from room to room. So anyway, although this was a really loooooooong story, it just felt like such an amazing experience to me that I couldn't leave any detail out!
I woke up around 2:00 am on December 31st to use the bathroom and when I climbed back in bed I couldn’t get comfortable. After tossing and turning for a few minutes, I was laying on my back, halfway through rolling over again when I felt the baby’s head turn inside me and ‘POP’ went my bag of waters! I had only enough time to tell Aaron to grab the towel at the foot of the bed before everything started rushing out of me, and after completely soaking 4 towels I seemed to finally stop leaking. Aaron brought me the phone and I called Deb at 2:15 am to let her know my water bag broke and she told me to call back when contractions were 5 to 7 minutes apart. We got off the phone and I started climbing out of bed. Suddenly I leaked more fluid and soaked Aaron’s side of the bed (which still makes me chuckle!) and then could do nothing but stand at the side of the bed until I was finished leaking. Suddenly contractions started- not painful ones, but definitely stronger than the false labor ones I’d been getting for so long. I got downstairs and by 2:30 was back calling Deb because contractions were only 3 minutes apart. She said she was on her way and hung up the phone as Aaron and I were excitedly chatting about the baby finally coming- and on time for a tax deduction.
Deb and her assistant Katie arrived around 3:30 and I could feel the excitement in the air- and the rapidly increasing aches with each contraction.At 4:00 am I called my friend Teresa, who was to come and keep Josiah occupied while I was laboring, and I let her know it was the big day and to come over by 5:00 in case Josiah awoke earlier than his usual 6:00 am. Contractions began to get stronger and more difficult and, right as Teresa arrived at 5:00, I felt like true labor had begun. I spent most of my time laboring on all fours and rocking back and forth, kneeling on the bed and leaning on whoever was nearest me when a contraction hit and, eventually, laying on my right side because I became so tired I need to rest between contractions as much as I possibly could. I found side-lying to be pretty uncomfortable as far as labor positions go, but more comfortable between contractions than any other position I tried. An internal exam was done at this point and I was sitting around 5 to 6 cm dilated and 75% effaced which, although it sounded to me like I’d made no progress, it was actually going pretty well. Josiah had awaken around 5:30 am and came into the room to see why so many people were there and why Mommy was making funny noises. During one contraction he asked Teresa, “Sad?” and no one heard or understood what he was saying. When the contraction subsided I looked at him and said, “No honey, Mommy’s not sad, Mommy’s having the baby.” Then he seemed okay with it and went off to have breakfast and watch a little television with Teresa while I continued to labor.
Now, throughout a good portion of my labor I had insisted that cold washcloths be put on the back of my neck and my lower back because I kept getting so hot and anyone whose hands were remotely warm could not touch me because it felt so irritating to my body, but it was at this point that I suddenly wanted to get into the birthing tub’s warm water and let it help relax me and take some weight and pressure off my body. I climbed in the tub, with some help of course, and it felt really nice on my skin. Contractions were getting quite difficult at this point and I found myself moaning with each one. Josiah kept coming into the hallway where the tub was once in a while to see what mommy was doing and, occasionally, he would put out his arms and say “hug” when the contraction had subsided. Of course, I’d lean my head on him and let him hug me, since I was in no position to get up and hug him, and then we’d have kisses, and then he’d run off and go play some more while I labored some more. Sometimes he’d touch the water in the birthing tub and someone would remind him not to touch it since Mommy really needed it and he was pretty good about it, and he’d keep playing in the other room. After a while I felt that I needed to go to the bathroom so we got me out of the tub, dried off, and on the toilet, which didn’t really help me very much. I went back into the bedroom and went back and forth from hot to freezing until we finally found a good temperature to keep the room at, and I continued to labor on my right side, all the while complaining that I felt like I was going to be sick. They got me a bowl but I never threw up, and after a while they helped me roll onto my left side. Now that the bowl wasn’t in front of me anymore, I threw up on the bed. Go figure! I felt much better though, even though it made the next contraction feel impossible to deal with. Anyway, Deb said she wanted to check me again and see where I’d progressed to, so between contractions she did a really fast exam and found me to be at about 9 cm. It was encouraging to hear that because labor was really intense at this point and I just wanted everything to be over and done with! After trying and trying to find a comfortable position, I finally started pushing a little bit with some contractions- and felt like nothing was happening. After what I think was about 2 hours (which was probably more like 1 hour or so) it appeared I was making no progress so Deb did another exam- and I was still at 9 cm. It turned out that the baby’s head was cocked to one side ever-so-slightly, and it was preventing my cervix from dilating that last centimeter. She suggested I get on one knee and put the other one up and out to the side during contractions to try and help the baby into the position she needed to be in. I tried and it felt impossible to do- I just wanted to squat and lean forward instead because it was easier to deal with the pain, but I knew I had to shift the baby or else I’d be dealing with pain for a lot longer than I’d need to.
I ended up getting back into the birthing tub and with each contraction Aaron held my body up in his arms so I could do what I needed to do with my legs. It was at this point around 10:00 am or so, that Josiah was laid down for a nap and quickly fell asleep. About 12 to 15 contractions later I felt the need to go to the bathroom again and started pushing because I didn’t care anymore about using the stupid toilet, I hurt like hell and just wanted to be finished! I started pushing and after that first contraction where I pushed Deb asked me to reach inside my body and see if I could feel the baby’s head, which I couldn’t. The next contraction hit and I felt I had to push- I didn’t even have to try, I just did it automatically, screaming the entire time. After the contraction subsided I reached inside my body and this time I was able to feel the top of the baby’s head. Progress was being made, which was exciting as well as relieving, and I let Deb know that the baby was as far up as the length of my middle finger, or about 3 inches. The next contraction hit and I started pushing and screaming again when, all of a sudden, I felt the baby crowning- and no one was prepared for it! I shouted, “The baby’s head is coming out!” and Deb came over by my side and tried to reach under me and let me know she couldn’t reach where she needed to. Aaron was still helping me by holding my body up and I remember just flipping my body around so that, instead of facing outside the pool, I was almost facing the inside. I could hear Deb telling me to slow down my pushing, to give little pushes and to breathe more and I tried my best to do what she said to, since I knew it was important so I wouldn’t tear, or at least not severely. A few seconds later I felt the head deliver and Deb said, “Okay, you’ve birthed the head…and…here‘s your baby!” I had continued pushing and next thing you know, I’m holding a gooey purple baby in my arms.
Yes, purple- her heart rate was a little low and she was having trouble breathing at first, but after a quick rubdown she was fine. The umbilical cord was a little short so I couldn’t sit down yet (or else the baby would have gone under the water) but the water- and Aaron- were still holding me up, so it was fine. After Aaron cut the cord I passed off the baby to the assistant, Aaron, and Teresa, and Deb took care of me. We sat chatting about what had just happened as we waited for my body to expel the placenta. I couldn’t believe I had actually done it without any anesthesia and admitted that, if I hadn’t been delivering at home, I would have caved and gotten the epidural, so I was glad that I wasn’t at a hospital. It felt like to took forever to birth the placenta (probably because I was antsy to hold the baby again!) and finally Deb did a little cord tugging while I pushed on my abdomen from the outside and then it came out just fine. Teresa and Deb helped me out of the tub while Aaron and Katie worked with the baby and looked her over to see that everything was normal. I went and laid down on the bed and my own body was checked out for tears and cuts and bruising. I didn’t tear although I did bruise my perineum a little bit, and I was shaking really badly because of all the different hormones coursing through my body, so I was being covered with blankets and towels- anything dry- and finally I got to see my baby again. She started nursing right away and drifted off to sleep shortly after.
She was born at 10:51 am on December 31st, weighed 8 pounds and was 21 inches long. Aaron and I named her Talia Jordyn. I remember thanking Teresa for being there for me and especially for Josiah, and then she went home soon afterward. When Josiah woke up from his nap he came into the bedroom and saw me and the baby. He looked at me and I said “Hi, honey.” She looked at the baby and I asked him, “What’s Mommy holding?” He said, “Baby?” I said, “Yeah, Mommy’s holding our baby. Can you say Talia?” “Yeah, baby,” and then he leaned over and gave her a kiss to welcome her to the family. I later found out that, during one of the contractions, as I was rocking back and forth in the tub, he was outside the tub mimicking me, also rocking back and forth, and I recall having heard him imitating my panting once in a while as he was walking from room to room.
So anyway, although this was a really loooooooong story, it just felt like such an amazing experience to me that I couldn't leave any detail out!
