.

[ComaWhite]

We are moving. So we have decided to find GOOD homes for our pets sooner rather than frantically dumping them off at the pound last minute.
Anyways, how can I make this easier on all of us.

[HoneymoonBaby]

I'm trying hard to find something positive to say here, and I'm not coming up with anything. I'm sorry. Not only are you uprooting your daughter from the home she's known all her life and moving her to a very dangerous 3rd world country, you're giving away her best friend well in advance. I would expect your daughter to be very angry and confused for quite some time, and I wouldn't try to pacify that if I were you. Her feelings are justified.

Out of curiosity, is this move for your personal fulfillment or for the good of your daughter? It's a personal question and you don't have to answer it, but I hope you'll think about it for yourself.

[ComaWhite]

Not only are you uprooting your daughter from the home she's known all her life and moving her to a very dangerous 3rd world country

Excuse me? "Very Dangerous"??? Are you totally kidding me? Have you ever even been there??? The crime rate in my city is higher than anywhere there. What is this imagined danger you are talking about?
"Home" is not a place. It is not a physical thing. It is a place where you are in your heart, and where you are with your family who love you. And they are down there waiting for us.

is this move for your personal fulfillment or for the good of your daughter?

Am I better equiped to decide what is best for my child or ARE YOU?

How totally rude and nasty of you.

[shelbean91]

I've never had to do this, so I'm not sure how it would work. I'm assuming there is no way to keep Caz or you would make it happen- what a hard thing to have to do.

I would take many pictures of Caz and dd. I would keep his collar and his 'stuff' (have megan get new stuff) so she can see it and feel something tangible. Maybe try a stuffed animal that reminds her of him.

[mountain mom]

Honeymoon babe, I actually have you on ignore, because of your continued insensitivy, but Andrea is my friend.

How do you know better than Andrea about Belize, you can't possibly know as much about the country as her. Take that into consideration when you answer someone. You opinion is not gospel.

Andrea....I ask you to think in terms of this. When you love something it is okay to let go of that love and allow someone else to love that thing too. This is such a great lesson for your dd. Guide her to give without pain. It is an honourable thing to learn. It is a hard thing to learn but this is something you feel you must do to further your family's dream. Small sacrifices to a large goal and reward.

I really hoped that I helped alittle! I love you babe, you are such a great Mom

[DaryLLL]

Aww. She really loves her little cat. I can relate. I have 5!




Good advice above (except for HMB's). Is there any way after a little while, she could get something small, like a gerbil at least? She might be an intense critter lover and will really benefit from a small furry to love.

Do you like to let cats go outside? Mine all love to go out, but some laid back cats don't mind being indoors all the time. In general, long haired ones are more easy going than short hairs.

Sorry you have to deal with this hurt.

[HoneymoonBaby]

Originally Posted by mountain mom

Honeymoon babe, I actually have you on ignore, because of your continued insensitivy, but Andrea is my friend.

How do you know better than Andrea about Belize, you can't possibly know as much about the country as her. Take that into consideration when you answer someone. You opinion is not gospel.

Actually, you have me on ignore because I disagree with you politically, not because I'm insensitive. There are plenty of people around here more insensitive and nasty than me who you really LIKE talking to because they validate your view of the world.

I can't POSSIBLY know as much about Belize as Andrea? For all you know, I grew up there. Be careful with your assumptions as you warn me to be careful of mine.

Of course, I did not grow up there. I base my opinion on what I know about the country from news reports, anecdotes from several friends who have visited the country recently, and the quick bit of research I did on the CIA website before I answered Andrea's question. From what I know of Belize, it is increasingly involved with the South American drug trade and urban crime is on the rise.

I hope, Andrea, that you are living in a safe place and I am very glad to hear that you will have family surrounding you. I'm sorry I came across as rude in my post, but I really didn't know what else to say. Moving out of the country, losing your cat and even moving into a new apartment is an incredible amount of change to throw at a young child. I really sat and tried to think of a way to make it easier on her and when I realized I couldn't - that this change just will. be. hard. and there isn't much anyone can do about it, I felt incredibly sorry for your daughter. And it made me wonder why you even got a kitten in the first place, knowing you were leaving the country in a year.

I'm sorry to be hard on you because I'm 100% sure you love your daughter and think what you're doing is best for her. I just think there are other ways to let a kid "grow up free with the earth beneath her feet" short of leaving the developed world behind. It seems a bit drastic and risky.

But -- and this is a HUGE but -- it sounds like you have minimized a lot of the risks and are more familiar with the country than I "ASSumed." I'm quite sorry I jumped to conclusions. There are a lot of dreamers on this board who romanticize the idea of living abroad as if every other place on earth is inherently superior to evil, consumerist America. You are obviously not one of them. Hell, you even got a worm in your head and still want to go back, so that must say SOMETHING for Belize, right? I promise I wish you the best and I hope this huge change is as easy as possible for your whole family.

And, whether mountain mom has me on ignore or not, I totally agree with this bit she had to say:

Originally Posted by mountain mom

Andrea....I ask you to think in terms of this. When you love something it is okay to let go of that love and allow someone else to love that thing too. This is such a great lesson for your dd. Guide her to give without pain. It is an honourable thing to learn.

I think that's excellent advice and incredibly insightful. I wish I had thought of it. I hope you'll be willing to put aside political differences and give me such excellent advice if I ever post a tough problem in the future.

[DaryLLL]

Oddly, we moved when my first born was 18 mos and she never looked back. Home was wherever Mom and Dad were. She seemed open to the adventure.


Then we moved again when all 3 kids were older and it was 1 1/2 hrs from their old friends and we visited a lot until they made new ones.

No huge trauma either time.

I am hearing that Belize is dangerous, but have you been to Wash DC lately?

[HoneymoonBaby]

Originally Posted by DaryLLL

I am hearing that Belize is dangerous, but have you been to Wash DC lately?

:LOL I live there (well, just outside of it, anyway). You're not kidding.

[edamommy]

: hmmmm nothing to say that's good. So, I'll say nothing.

[DaryLLL]

edamommy, j'adore Mt Desert Isle!

[mountain mom]

Originally Posted by HoneymoonBaby

I think that's excellent advice and incredibly insightful. I wish I had thought of it. I hope you'll be willing to put aside political differences and give me such excellent advice if I ever post a tough problem in the future.

Ya I would. It would be the human thing to do. That is, if I had some good advice to offer. :LOL

Edamommy, why the and the : ?

[edamommy]

Originally Posted by DaryLLL

edamommy, j'adore Mt Desert Isle!

You've been? On Vacation? Will you be back? I too, LOVE this island! My whole family lives here and always has. I had a stint away and just moved back after almost 10 years- ahhhh!

[edamommy]

Originally Posted by mountain mom

Andrea....I ask you to think in terms of this. When you love something it is okay to let go of that love and allow someone else to love that thing too. This is such a great lesson for your dd. Guide her to give without pain. It is an honourable thing to learn. It is a hard thing to learn but this is something you feel you must do to further your family's dream. Small sacrifices to a large goal and reward.

Just as long as it's taught that that "thing" was a living being! And that humans are responsible for bringing them into their homes,etc!