I'm right here with you.I had a huge attack yesterday.I thought it had to do with my blood sugar,which may have had a little to do with it,but I know now it was anxiety.I've had so many things going on,for years,and I have had a very hard time dealing with it all.I live with an alchoholic(dh),my ds was taken from us by CPS for 2 weeks due to his homebirth and he had open heart surgery and we are almost positive he is autistic,my mom just went through treatment for breast cancer,my very special kitty,my Muldey,died,dh was laid off,dd has many issues from all of this and I'm the one who has to hold us all together.I feel like i can't get sick,I can't feel sad or upset because when I do someone gets angry with me(usually my dad,he doesn't show emotions very often,but shows it in other ways such as stomach problems).I very rarely cry,because when I do I am basically pushed away by dh,which makes me even more upset.Dd and ds know when I am very upset,ds will hug me and dd will draw me pictures,but I try to avoid them seeing me that way.
I'm going to try changing my diet,I rarely drink soda and I never drink coffee,I usually drink tons of water so at least I have that already.I'm also going to keep Rescue Remedy on me at all times.Just knowing it was anxiety has helped me.I kind of know what to expect,and what to do when it happens.The breathing a pp mentioned helps a lot.That was how I got to sleep last night.I concentrated on my breathing.I always have a very hard time falling asleep.I worry about everything,from dd's homeschool work,my messy house,ds,dh's drinking.I felt so bad,because I made my mom cry because I have been having these issues for a while now,and never told her.I just didn't want to add to her pain,you know?I have to go,dd needs me.
