The Giving Tree

[IdentityCrisisMama]

What’s up with this book? My friend gave it to DD because it is one of her favorites but I really, really don’t like it.

The way I see it, the tree gives and gives and the boy takes and takes…and then the tree gives more and then is happy. Seems like a bad message to me for some reason.

What are your thoughts?

[Wilhemina]

Can't stand it. Very ugly message. I've seen this discussed here before along with other seemingly inocuous and popular children's books that bear creepy messages like Rainbow Fish.

I'll let other take over, but I've seen critics describe The Giving Tree as misogynist and fans claim it as a Christian allegory.

[MoMommy]

I don't like it, either. For some reason I bought it when I was preggo because I thought I remembered liking it as a kid, but it's terrible and depressing.

[georgia]

Cannot STAND that book. Won't keep it in our house. Yuck!

[fluffernutter]

I bought The Giving Tree and Rainbow Fish online (without ever having read them) and I can't stand either of them. I don't know why so many people like them. Yuck.

[Susana]

The class I did my student teaching in back in 1988 (2nd grade class) bought me this book as a goodbye gift. The teacher signed it. I thought, how lovely, but when I read it I had a weird 'what the hell was that about' feeling.

It's a weird book.

and I wish the teacher would have had the mind to have the kids sign the book too...that would have made the whole gift.

Oh well.

[Itlbokay]

Even though this book is very sad for me as well...my boys do enjoy it. They feel so sorry for the tree and how it keeps giving itself unconditionally to the boy throughout his life (kind of like parents and their children) and they have had many wonderful conversations with me because of this book. Conversations about taking care of trees and most importantly not being caught up in money and wanting "things" like the boy in the story.

[fluffernutter]

On top of the creepy message, I don't even enjoy the writing. It doesn't flow well for me and it's hard to read because my brain wants to read it a certain way, kwim?

[KiwiZ]

Originally Posted by Wilhemina

Can't stand it. Very ugly message. I've seen this discussed here before along with other seemingly inocuous and popular children's books that bear creepy messages like Rainbow Fish.

Yeah, don't fish kinda need their scales to live? LOL

I don't like either the fish book or the tree book, but if my kids wanted to hear them, I'd use it as an opportunity to help them learn to think for themselves. For example, with the tree book, we could talk about how its loving to give of yourself but its ok to set boundaries and that we should be very thankful when others give of themselves. With the fish book, I'd use that as an opportunity to talk about how what is inside is most important and how friends should like each other for who they are, not what they have

[beatgirl]

I just had a long discussion this weekend with my dp and kids about Shel Silverstein and how much we loved him...then I saw this thread and it made me sad.

I guess we cant see everything the same

[lorijds]

I hate this book, too, because it is so sad!

My kids love this book; they are rooting for the tree, and they love to shout stuff at the boy who is so selfish.

As my dh says, this is a good story about a completely dysfunctional relationship with passive/aggressive and codependent tendencies.

I love Shel Silverstein; but I agree that this book is creepy and disturbing. I still have it around, even though the kids are really getting too old for it. It's one of those books that you like, but you don't like. At least, in our family, it ellicits some good discussion.

[jeniferm]

beatgirl - I, too, love Shel Silverstein, but not this book! For all the reasons mentioned so far I just really dislike it.

But, I, and probably many others, would be interested in hearing your take on the book. What do you love about it? Why do you think it's a wonderful book? Do you get a different message from it than the others who have posted? This is a great place to have a dialog on books, but it's much more interesting if the dialog is not one-sided, even if I happen to agree with that side.

[splendid]

I love Shel Silverstein poems.

I always thought this book was about unconditional love.

Sure the tree gets the short end of the stick (ETA: no pun intended). I always think of my mom and my siblings, that no matter how they screw up, she will provide for them regardless and love them regardless, and they take take take with no thanks or hugs. Its a testament to the tree more than the child.

[Itlbokay]

Even though this book makes me sad, I do like it.

I like the message that having things doesn't make you happy. The boy keeps coming to the tree whining about what (and that's how I make him sound when I read it aloud) he wants and even though the boy keeps getting what he wants, he never seems happy.

In the end the boy (old man now) realizes he didn't need much after all....too late for the tree of course (hence the part I don't like) but the lesson is learned.

[MamaBug]

Originally Posted by Susana

The class I did my student teaching in back in 1988 (2nd grade class) bought me this book as a goodbye gift. The teacher signed it. I thought, how lovely, but when I read it I had a weird 'what the hell was that about' feeling.

It's a weird book.

OMG I got the same gift after I was done student teaching and thought the same thing. I still have the book but have never read it to my boys, I just don't like it at all

[spero]

I happen to love the book, but I'm one of those Christian wingnuts that sees the tree as a Jesus figure.

Originally Posted by Itlbokay

In the end the boy (old man now) realizes he didn't need much after all....too late for the tree of course...

Ah, but I don't see it that way. In the end, the tree got exactly what she always wanted - the boy's love & companionship.

[Susana]

Mamabug, LOL

[Carolinamidwife]

You know... I really LOVED that book as a child, one of my very favorites. So, I bought it as soon as I became pregnant. I read it one time to baby ds and I could not believe how depressing it was! Horrifyingly deppresing. I am not one who gets my panties in a wad about secret psychological meanings in kid's books but this book even got me going, lol. And I also love Silverstein... I think we will stick to Where the Sidewalk Ends.

[journeymom]

While I like Skellebell's analysis of it, from what I know about Silverstein, the Christian analogy doesn't seem likely.

I liked it when I was a kid and don't like it now, either.

[Carolinamidwife]

What is his analysis??? I would love to read it.