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Where should we go?

post #1 of 273
Thread Starter 
Cynthia, we would like to start a tribe of mothers who have survived abuse, and are now trying to raise their little ones with AP/NFL principles in mind. Where would be the best place for it? We want it to be a safe place- we want to do GD, but need not to feel attacked when we fail, and we want it to be a place where we can share our failures and successes and not feel judged. We were thinking personal growth, but wanted to check in first so we didn't risk it being moved. Thanks!
Annette
post #2 of 273
We're going to provide a private forum for this. I"ve discussed it with Peggy, she's read the other thread discussing it and she's approved.

But please be a bit patient. I'll need to set up the forum and woprk out some sort of guidelines for participation and access. It will take a bit of time.
post #3 of 273
Thread Starter 
Cynthia, I have tears in my eyes.
THANK YOU!!!!!!
THANK PEGGY!!!!
Annette
post #4 of 273
Do you mean physically abused? :

Don't mean to butt in, but I am interested.

I was "spanked" (way excessively; you name it...I have probably been hit with it)

I have a very hard time not yelling. I also belittle my babies sometimes

It is intimidating in GD sometimes.
post #5 of 273
Yup, this is exactly what we mean. Physically, emotionally, sexually...This is specifically for the trials of getting past our "programming" and parenting our kids differently!!!
post #6 of 273
I am SO HAPPY this will happen!!! IT will be so nice to have a "safe" place to discuss this part of our lives.
post #7 of 273
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
post #8 of 273
post #9 of 273
Quote:
Originally Posted by MommytoMJM
Yup, this is exactly what we mean. Physically, emotionally, sexually...This is specifically for the trials of getting past our "programming" and parenting our kids differently!!!
I literally was just crying about this last night!!!

IRL most of the people I know think spanking is ok. If I get the urge to spank, their "comforting" is...you should they deserve it!

I kills me. And I feel so alone. It is hard to share in GD because I have seen mamas attacked for just thinking non GD. It is painful. It is so difficult to reprogram your every fiber. But I desperately keep trying!
post #10 of 273
Thank you Cynthia and Peggy!!!
post #11 of 273
Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!!
post #12 of 273
does x-spousal/partner abuse qualify?
if not, that's ok
post #13 of 273


Thank you, Thank you, Cynthia & Peggy!!!

Posting nervously... After growing up with a father who did nothing but instill fear in me (to say I was relieved when he left my dear mom, and that I was old enough to not have court decide for me if I should have to see him, is an understatement) I am so grateful for this upcoming forum!! I need help working on not yelling (which was a biggy of his, which is why it kills me that I do it at all the guilt the few times I have had that as a first reaction hurts so much)

Quote:
It is painful. It is so difficult to reprogram your every fiber. But I desperately keep trying!
Yes, that's it EXACTLY!! I HATE that I ever yell, but it's like it is *programmed* in me.
post #14 of 273
Yes, thank you!
post #15 of 273
I'd like to be part of this, too.
post #16 of 273
Me too...Thank you!
post #17 of 273
Yes I think this is a great idea and would love to participate. I grew up with an abusive dad then lived through an abusive marriage. I do NOT want this pattern to continue through my children.
post #18 of 273
Quote:
Originally Posted by polka123
does x-spousal/partner abuse qualify?
if not, that's ok
I don't think any of us want to limit participation (except for making sure everyone feels safe). Partner violence can have a real effect on parenting (and self-esteem, for sure), so I think you'd be very welcome to join us.
post #19 of 273
Quote:
Originally Posted by polka123
does x-spousal/partner abuse qualify?
if not, that's ok
Absolutely!!!!
post #20 of 273
And I too add my heartfelt thanks to you! You do not know what this meas to those of us who have had this humiliation happen to us in our life!!!! I sooooo desperately have needed this and am so incredibly happy to have a safe place to fall!!!!
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