Csection Support Thread April 2005 (cont discussion from March) - Page 2

[mamatowill]

Hi Ladies!
I am going to join you- I have enjoyed reading your stories. I am 10 months pp with my DS. I had an unexpected c-section. Everything went normally for me during my labour. I had great care for the first 12 hours but the last hours of labour I had horrible nurses. The last one kept yelling at me that I wasn't trying hard enough to have the baby! The nurses stood over me and talked about my condition like I wasn't there. My had broke at 7:15 am, I was in full labour by 4:00pm but they didn't let me push until 9:00pm. By 11:30 I had gone nowhere. DS was unable to engage into the birth canal. The mean nurse said that we were going to have to do vacuum extraction but that I was going to have to push harder than I was. I started to cry because I was exhausted. The OB was really nice and told me that we could do an extraction but a c-section would be better. We went with the c-section and when he was born we found out why he could not engage- DS weighed in at 11 ls. 2oz! The OB told me that if we had tried anything but a c-section that both DS and I would have been severely damaged. It was good that I had the c-section but it has taken along time for me to be comfortable with the decision.

Sorry for the ramble but this is the first time that I have shared my story outside of close friends.

[shannon0218]

Help, need advice on these symptoms

Hi everyone, I posted this in TAO for the traffic and someone suggested I post it here as well. I'm hoping some of you can provide some insight into these post c-section health problems.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I need some opinions and help on a health problem I'm dealing with. It's really stressing me out and upsetting me.
5 weeks ago I had a planned c-section due to pre-eclampsia and severe arthritis in my hips. My recovery was awsome, I was up and walking around with no pain meds whatsoever the next day. In the following couple weeks the only time I needed any pain meds was if I had overdone things. I had sex at only 17 days pp with no pain. My bleeding had all but stopped at that point as well.
Starting 2 weeks ago, I was feeling some pain on the left side about 2" above my incision. Went to the doctor and she put me on antibiotics as I had a previous uterine infection after a d&c (arthritis had me on prednisone through all 4 pregnancies which does leave me more prone to infection) She told me to call her on the weekend if there was not significant improvement. Sat morning she added cipro as I called to say that while there was no improvement I also wasn't any worse. Sunday was a busy day as we went to a baby shower for my dd, on the way home I had to pull over as I had horrible stabbing pains, I made it to a coffee shop with a bathroom and there passed a clot the size of a baseball, the pain temporarily subsided and I continued home but over the next couple hours it got really bad again. I called my OB and she had me come right in to the hospital. She started me on IV antibiotics, pain meds and wanted to admit me, they arranged for the baby to be admitted with me so I agreed, the next day I had an u/s which was normal. If my abdomen is palpated there is a very painful spot (left side just above incision) She had a surgeon see me the next day and he ordered a cat scan, that too was normal, although I am allergic to the dye used so it wasn't as complete as we'd have liked. He arranged for an internist to have a look at me.
At this point I was becoming very frustrated with being in this much pain and having no answers and was getting very teary, of course when the tears started all the nurses (OBS ward) figured it was PPD--I admit I was getting depressed but none of it had anything to do with the baby--just with being in this much pain and not having any answers.
I opted on Friday for release with no answers as I found everyone around me was handling me with kid gloves, I got the impression they felt since they could find no physical signs it had to just be in my head (doctor denied this, but honestly I don't believe her) Every time they would come in to talk to me, I would start crying mainly because I didn't feel they were listening to me--this of course just added proof to their PPD diagnosis.

So my question.... I'm still very convinced there is something wrong that just hasn't been found as yet, anyone have any ideas as to what it could be???
Oh and one more thing--I've been horribly constipated since the pain started and the only way I've been able to have a bowel movement is with the help of an enema or suppository, oral laxatives and diet do absolutely NOTHING.

I do not believe I have PPD, I took the internet test and scored at 38, I don't deny being depressed though, just I don't think it has anything to do with the baby, she brings me such joy and comfort and I can't get enough of her sweet little face.

Ideas--Anyone????

[OnTheFence]

Shannon,

It very well may be adhesions. And there really isnt anything you can do about it. Also not to scold, but its very possible you have over done things, causing tearing and improper healing. There is a reason they say no sex for at least 4 weeks and preferrable to wait 6. You are suppose to be resting for those first six weeks, lifting nothing more than your baby for 4-6 weeks, at least no driving for 2 weeks. This means no heavy laundry or running around the house too. You need to be more or less a couch potato. The reason is may hurt on one side more than the other is because of how they pulled your baby out of the incision. It is common for some to have this feeling on one side and to have more adhesions on one side.
Just to remind you, you did have major abdominal surgery! I know its hard to see it that way when you have a cute baby to look after and others to take care of, but you have to give. Unfortunately not taking it easy can cause problems, longer healing time, adhesions and even a hernia in the incision area.
My advice to you at this point since nothing was found in your testing is TAKE IT EASY. Lift nothing heavier than your baby. Don't stand on your feet for long periods of time. Don't lift laundry baskets or wet laundry. Try to sit on your hiney and rest. Ask for help as often as you need it (which is probably more than you are asking now!), and accept that for a period of time you may need to lesson your ideals of how things should be and just focus on healing and resting for right now. Down the road things will come back together.
If in another 6-8 weeks you are still in pain after doing the above, You may want to see someone else or see an internist. You could have a hernia, however I think what could be the problem is not following the standard of care after major abdominal surgery.

Keep us updated!

[shannon0218]

Yeah, I was afraid I'd just overdone things, I guess when you suddenly feel so much better, even with major surgery than you've felt for literally months...it's hard to keep things still I did get a call this morning from my ob and she sent my U/S and cat scan to another doc for his opinion, anyway, I have a clotting disorder that had me on heparin throughout my pregnancy, they think that there may actually be a clot in my left fallopian tube, there is indeed decreased blood flow so I've been started on therapuetic levels of heparin again in hopes that we see an improvement soon.
Wish me luck--in the meantime, this kind of pain pretty much assures I'm taking it very easy!!

[mandalamama]

hi all 4.5 months PP here. quick recap: i had about 28 hours natural labor, then a necessary cesarean (she was hung up on a short cord wrapped twice around her neck, didn't start distressing until hour 29). i had two doulas and my husband with me, and a very supportive pair of labor nurses. i loved the labor, it hurt of course but it was such a primal, beautiful experience. and i can't regret the c-birth knowing it was so absolutely necessary in our case.

i love my daughter like i've never loved anyone before ... but i can tell the bonding doesn't go both ways with us. we lost breastfeeding in her fourth week, because of my medical problems and medications, and i think that's a major part of it. there's this huge "disconnect" between us ... i was in labor, we were dancing together, then boom, she was gone and out of me. no natural transition of things, you know? and now, she's hungry, she gets a bottle, again something artificial is between us. no matter how lovingly i bottle-nurse her, nothing can get close to breastfeeding bonding.

she smiles at me, i'm starting to notice sort of an "i love you"-ish look in her eyes once in a while, but honestly she smiles at everybody and loves it when anybody picks her up. she shows no preference for me at all. i have no idea if that's a bonding issue with us ... or does it mean that because i've always been there for her, she feels secure in other people's arms knowing i'll be there again? all i know is, i read about how other babies cry to be in their mama's arms, and my daughter doesn't do that. so i have no idea if it was the c-birth and not breastfeeding that's causing that to happen, or if it could just be her temperament. i just keep holding her and loving her and gazing deeply into her eyes and talking to her, i feel so incredibly connected to her, i am just dying to feel that connection go both ways.

my adhesions are OW OW OW! i'm finding that i can't get back to normal functioning, like i can't bend to lift or clean, and even holding Willow is hard sometimes. i keep propping us up in a nest of blankets and pillows to stay comfy. i worry about when she starts skootching or crawling, my ability to crawl with her or pick her up, my belly feels like it's ripping open again and again. i know i overdo it, i'm just one of those people who can't sit still, you know? still no feeling at the scar, it's totally numb inside and out, all the pain is above and to the right.

have your c-births caused any delayed bonding, or bonding problems, for you and your babes?

[Llyra]

Melllybean, I also worried so much about our bonding, since I was given general anesthesia and I never saw my DD until she was three hours old, and since we also had very serious problems learning to breastfeed, and never did succeed. DD spent those first few hours under lights with DH holding her, and sometimes I feel jealous because I think she is more bonded to him. Honestly, my DD showed no preference for anyone during the early months, and was largely only interested in eating, sleeping, and staring at the black-and-white curtain in my bedroom. But now that she is six months old, she shows a definite preference for me and DH, and I feel more rewarded and more like we've really connected. I say give it time, and patience, and continue to be there for her. It will feel rather one-sided until your DD gets a little older.

I can totally relate to the breastfeeding problems. DD was severely lethargic for her whole first week, due to jaundice and the effects of my general anesthetic. She latched on well during the first few days, and then there was a whole lot of hoopla about her kidneys not functioning properly and some nurse gave her a bottle, and she never latched on again. I pumped for two months and then gave up in exhaustian because she still wouldn't latch after a million different strategies and attempts, I couldn't keep up a supply with the pump, and I was starting to resent her for putting me through all that. It was incredibly sad, and I definitely regret it for the bonding experience I feel I missed, but honestly i don't think DD cares at all.

Be patient with yourself! Give it time, find ways to spend close time with her, and it will come!

******

[Llyra]

Hi all. I just talked a lot in the previous post and I never actually introduced myself. I'm mama to 6 month old Julia, who was born by emergency c-section after a high risk pregnancy and 27 hours of labor. I have a lot of bitter feelings about my c-section, and I spend a lot of time going over it in my mind and trying to work out what went wrong and how I could have prevented it, and I'm having trouble coming to terms with the fact that there really isn't anything I could have done.

I was high risk to begin with because I have a heart condition that caused Julia to also be tachycardic in utero. Also, my uterus was already not intact because of scarring from a D& C I had after an incomplete miscarriage a few years ago, and the scarring had caused what's called a synechia inside the amniotic sac (something like adhesions) which was blocking DD from descending during birth. My water broke before labor started, and I labored 27 hours before I developed a high fever and DD's heartrate became erratic. Turns out she was entangled in the synechia and couldn't descend, and I was developing an infection. I got to 8 cm and stayed there for four hours, and eventually the problems just escalated to the point that we decided to do a section.

DH thinks that if I hadn't refused pitocin, I might have fully dilated sooner, but I don't see how that would have helped the entanglement. When I look at the whole thing objectively, I see that there really was nothing I could have done, and that we're incredibly lucky that the technology existed to help Julia. But I can't help feeling bitter, especially because of the resulting breastfeeding problems (see above post) and because I am very clearly NOT a good candidate for VBAC, so I will have to go through another section if I want another baby, which I do.

I try and just concentrate on the fact that Julia is healthy and happy and thriving, and forget everything else.

Anyway, it's really nice to see this thread. Sometimes i feel really left out and dejected among all the homebirths and natural births around here...

[Al Dente]

Wow, a lot of you all are pregnant again! I didn't notice that on the last thread. I guess I'm not paying good attention since some of you are pretty far along. :LOL Congrats!

Things have been crazy here-fil had quintuple bypass surgery, we lost our house and are moving in with the il's, I'm finishing my last 2 classes-so I haven't been able to keep up on the thread.

I can honestly say that I have zero regret or guilt about having a c-section. Ds was malpositioned (had been transverse for months) and never engaged. We went to 43 weeks and tried everything-chiropractic, herbs, moxa, accupuncture, everything I'd ever heard of-to get him to turn and nothing did. I had an incredible surgeon, a speedy recovery, and I never experience pain or numbness. The scar is microscopic. I went through all the normal feelings of "what if" for a couple of months after his birth, but then they just faded away. I will have a c-section again if I ever get pregnant again.

I do have a ? though. Has anyone experienced fluttery feelings that feel exactly like a baby kicking them? Anyone that isn't pregnant, that is? This started last night and it is freaking me out. I'm definitely not preg. I can't believe it's been almost a year since ds was born!

Thanks Kim for always starting this thread. It is very valuable for us to know that other AP Mamas do have c-sections, even *gasp* by choice.

[pinky]

Originally Posted by mellybean

i have no idea if it was the c-birth and not breastfeeding that's causing that to happen, or if it could just be her temperament. i just keep holding her and loving her and gazing deeply into her eyes and talking to her, i feel so incredibly connected to her, i am just dying to feel that connection go both ways....
have your c-births caused any delayed bonding, or bonding problems, for you and your babes?

Melly, in retrospect I would say much the same thing about my first dd (now almost 4)...we had a pretty traumatic birth with c-sec, she was in the NICU, we had lots of nursing problems...but I'd have to say that I still think it was more about her temperment/personality than anything else. It took me a long time to feel like I was getting much back from her other than a desperate need to nurse at times, but this never felt much like love. My new dd (also a c-sec) came out of the womb gazing up at me adoringly, go figure.

Consider the up-side, though....I can't even leave the house w/o dd #2..whereas with dd #1 was always pretty content without me as long as she wasn't hungry.

That being said, I have a wonderful close totally bonded relationship with my older daughter. Really, we couldn't be closer. I just think the timetable is different for different babies. Try not to worry--you WILL feel all those things coming back at you..it just might take a little time.

[Mamame]

Rachel -

I also get the same flutters in my tummy and think that if I were really early pregnant, I'd think it was the baby! LOL! I guess it's just muscle spasms but it definately makes me remember my babies kicking.

As for the not bonding issue, I've had good bonding with all of my babies even with the sections. My first ended up being bottlefed - not due to the section or anything but due to the fact that she has neurological issues and just couldn't latch on. She had a rough time on the bottle too (it would take her an hour and a half to drink a few oz.) and as she got older, she needed extensive speech therapy and still, at almost 15, has 'mouth issues'. I also was not an AP parent with her but I definately bonded with her. I was able to nurse her in the recovery room and had her most of the time in my bed with me. All of my kids were nursed within a few hours of birth - the second was the longest time after birth because they had to cut through the placenta to get her and I bled a LOT so they wanted me to be watched a while without the baby. She went on to nurse for 12 months, my 3rd went 20 months and my 4th weaned at 23 months. I co-slept with them and definately bonded with each one fully despite the section. I know that there's something special I missed by not having them vaginally but I guess my approach to the birth made it that it didn't affect us much.

It's tough when you have a vision of a perfect natural birth and end up with lots of intervention but many times it's so necessary. If you've done all you could and it was dangerous for you to not have a section, you did the best you possibly could and you'd be dead if it were another time in history! I just keep thanking God for the technology we have today that I am able to be a mama to 4 beautiful children when there's no way I could have a vaginal birth. I just really feel blessed.

[J-Max]

Birth Plan

I thought someone had posted a c-sec birth plan, but I can't find it, does anyone have a link to a good one? It looks like I maybe having this baby soon (like maybe this weekend), and I want to go over my birth needs with my doc on Friday morning. He is really good and usually lets me do what I want, but I want things in writing.

Thanks for any help!

[Valerie.Qc]

Help me support my client

Hi!

I'm at my first experience as a Doula and my client will probably have a c-section (baby is breach at 37w - if the baby still breach next tuesday they will transfer her to another OB to do the CS).

She told me she want to have general anesthesia because someone (she said a nurse) told her that some woman feels the cut with an epidural. I know one can feel some pressure (I did when I had my CS 14y ago) but feeling the cut? First time I hear that! I can't find anything in books I have...

I'll see her tomorrow or friday and bring infos about the effects of anesthesia vs epidural but would like to be able to address her fear of feeling pain if she choose epidural.

Thanks

[Mamame]

She should not feel any cutting at all with proper anesthesia. There ARE scare stories talking about women feeling them cutting but I really think that's a rare case. I have had 4 sections and know a number of women who have had them and none of us have felt anything. I DO think a spinal is much better than an epidural because of how fast it takes affect - so fast that my feet were already numb as I went to lay down on the table as opposed to the 5-10 minutes it took with the epidural. I've had 2 of each and really loved my spinal.

I'd try to reassure her that epidurals and spinals are safe and effective and the anethesiologist makes sure that there's enough anesthesia to make it comfortable. The doctors ask you if you can feel anything before they start and you can be pretty sure you won't feel any cutting. You DO feel the pressure of them moving the baby down and pulling them out but it's just a shoving, pressure kind of thing and not that hard PLUS the experience of being awake to hear that first cry and see the baby right after it's born is wonderful. I remember hearing my son cry before he was even born (they just had his head out) and crying myself when I heard it was a boy after 2 girls and being told this one was a girl! The joy was amazing.

In addition to this, the recovery from a general is longer and she won't be able to hold the baby for a few hours as opposed to getting the baby in the recovery room with a regional block. It's SO much better for both mom and babe, I think!

Ann

[tammylc]

Originally Posted by Jessmcg

I thought someone had posted a c-sec birth plan, but I can't find it, does anyone have a link to a good one? It looks like I maybe having this baby soon (like maybe this weekend), and I want to go over my birth needs with my doc on Friday morning. He is really good and usually lets me do what I want, but I want things in writing.

Thanks for any help!

Here's a link to my c/s birth plan:

http://www.livejournal.com/users/tammylc/276736.html

[ankh]

Iud

[QUOTE=

In any case, I'm getting an IUD on March 7, so no babies anytime in the near future. I'm a little worried about it, since I didn't have a vaginal delivery, I'm guessing it's going to hurt a lot to have it inserted. Anyone have any experience with IUDs?[/QUOTE]

Yep and I've had two c-sections. My concern with the IUD was even more painful periods so the dr put one in that is supposed to lessen the pain, he didn't realise I hadn't had a vaginal birth so was a bit worried when he realised which one he was putting in( for vaginal births)- hope that made sense! It hurt like hell for a few minutes but to be honest it was worth it, my periods aren't painful, just heavy, I felt a bit funny down there for a bit but it's actually good now. I have a couple of friends who have them after having had c-sections and they say the same thing. I did go to a very expereinced dr.
The pain was like a really bad cramp, but I just breathed through it, it's way better than any other contraceptive I've used, and I think I've done them all!

hope that helps a bit, If I think of anything else I'll let you know or if you think I missed anything let me know

[tammylc]

Thanks Lisa for the info. Do you know if you got the Mirena or the Paragard? (The Mirena has hormones and lasts 5 years, the Paragard is hormone-free and good for 10.)

I must have cursed myself by writing about not having a period yet, because Aunt Flo came for a visit on Tuesday night. It's very light, and no cramps, thankfully. But still - bummer! I guess I shouldn't complain too much, since I got 10 months, even though I've been away from DS 9 hours and pumping three days a week because of going back to work.

[shannon0218]

Hi everyone, since I've read a couple of you were not able to make the breastfeeding work maybe you can answer another question for me I didn't produce any milk at all (previous breast reduction) so Molly has been on formula since day one, when did you start getting periods again?? I have copious amounts of egg white cervical mucous and I'm wondering if I may be ovulating now (I'm 5.5 weeks past c-section)

On the feeling cutting during a c-section. My spinal didn't really take and right from the start I able to feel and move my legs and feel people touching me, I felt a lot during my surgery but I didn't feel the initial cut--even though I felt tons of pain during my c-section--I wouldn't have had it any other way-not a chance--they were at first trying to get me through with just IV pain killers so I could see Molly be born--she too was crying when just her head was out and I can tell you there is no greater pain reliever than seeing that baby you've waited 9 mos to meet, after she was out I just stared at her. Usually they send dad and baby out while they're closing but because I was feeling everything but happy as long as I could look at her my husband never left the room.
When they were offering me a general my biggest thing at first was that I would never deprive my husband (or myself) of seeing our baby born--I couldn't imagine having her come into the world with her mama asleep and no daddy there. So my spinal never worked (my doc didn't realize to what degree until I moved myself from the operating table to my bed) but I never felt the actual cut and if I had to do it again tomorrow I still wouldn't take a general!

[ankh]

IUD after C-section

tammylc,
I got mine done just before I left Canada for the US. It's called the Flexi-T(+)I'm just reading the leaflet thingy right now and it says it works by realeasing copper which the dr SWORE was harmless. You can leave this one in for three years I think it's quite new and everything I'm reading here says the copper is ok - who knows?
Ok found it, it says here the "daily intake of copper in food is 100 times higher than the daily release of a copper IUD" I like the fact it doesn't makes your periods worse.
Lisa

[Valerie.Qc]

Thank you for your replies

My client is really, I mean REALLY afraid of ANY pain... She is more comfortable with a c-section than a natural birth because of this (I think her baby turned because of this ) and, if there is a little chance she might feel something, I feel that she will go for the general Well, it's HER birth and HER choice - the only thing I can do is give her all the infos and then support her in her decision and help her welcoming her baby as best as we can.

[ankh]

I think thats a real shame she is so frightened, poor thing. I have only had c-sections, one emergency and one planned, compared to my friends who have had vaginal births the recovery is SO much harder.
I did find the spinal with number two better than an epidural. Both made me very headachey and throw up, v.nasty feeling.I remember trying to get Jasmine to latch on while throwing up everywhere and bleeding heavily from My IV- talk about multi-tasking! I think however you get your baby out as long as Mum and Babe are ok then that is what she should focus on.