We are white foster parents, and have recently had two black children placed with us. The first time we had a black child, there were no issues, but this time there are.
The (white) workers and the (black) mother were complaining about our care of the children's hair and personal hygiene (the kids are boys, and old enough to do their own). Anyway, one especially has really dry skin, so we were limiting showers to every other day.
This wasn't good enough for the workers, and I got a number of phone calls that they needed to shower twice a day. I was given a list of stuff needed for their hair (shampoo with conditioner, more conditioner, hairspray), and body (shower gel, baby soap, lotion etc.). Our agency also runs a seminar on black skin and hair care, and here is where I have the issue.
I was given the seminar handout by the (black) worker who does it. I'll skip the medical and psychosocial parts (their words), but the routine is like this:
Hygiene:
birth-3 yrs. bath or shower, twice a day, bath foam, baby soap sponge/loofah, lotion.
3-10yrs. 2 shower/bath per day, moisturizing soap/loofah/lotion/lip balm/hand cream
10+ as above, but intensive lotion.
Hair care:
0-4 months, washed twice a day, baby shampoo/baby oil.
4 months - 5 years, boys - as part of shower (ie. twice a day); girls once a week. When boys' hair is difficult to comb, then it needs cut, a girl's needs corn rows.
5+ years, no change for boys, girls washed every two weeks. They also talk here about extensions/chemical relaxing for girls.
Isn't this excessive? And how come boys are twice a day, girls are twice a month? I'm having a hard time feeling like I can argue this with them, not being black. But when I was told to buy all the stuff, I was also told that the boys know what's needed and to check with them. Guess what??? At home, they shower every other day, and all they use on their hair is baby shampoo. WTF???? They've even asked us how come they have to do so much here, when they don't at home.
And no, we never let them go out dirty.
The (white) workers and the (black) mother were complaining about our care of the children's hair and personal hygiene (the kids are boys, and old enough to do their own). Anyway, one especially has really dry skin, so we were limiting showers to every other day.
This wasn't good enough for the workers, and I got a number of phone calls that they needed to shower twice a day. I was given a list of stuff needed for their hair (shampoo with conditioner, more conditioner, hairspray), and body (shower gel, baby soap, lotion etc.). Our agency also runs a seminar on black skin and hair care, and here is where I have the issue.
I was given the seminar handout by the (black) worker who does it. I'll skip the medical and psychosocial parts (their words), but the routine is like this:
Hygiene:
birth-3 yrs. bath or shower, twice a day, bath foam, baby soap sponge/loofah, lotion.
3-10yrs. 2 shower/bath per day, moisturizing soap/loofah/lotion/lip balm/hand cream
10+ as above, but intensive lotion.
Hair care:
0-4 months, washed twice a day, baby shampoo/baby oil.
4 months - 5 years, boys - as part of shower (ie. twice a day); girls once a week. When boys' hair is difficult to comb, then it needs cut, a girl's needs corn rows.
5+ years, no change for boys, girls washed every two weeks. They also talk here about extensions/chemical relaxing for girls.
Isn't this excessive? And how come boys are twice a day, girls are twice a month? I'm having a hard time feeling like I can argue this with them, not being black. But when I was told to buy all the stuff, I was also told that the boys know what's needed and to check with them. Guess what??? At home, they shower every other day, and all they use on their hair is baby shampoo. WTF???? They've even asked us how come they have to do so much here, when they don't at home.
And no, we never let them go out dirty.
:
.
Though getting into the politics of black hair would be a thread unto itself.
: They do get washed up daily, though.
