Originally Posted by jenoline
IMO, politeness is as much conveyed in tone of voice and attitude as it is in any word that a child is taught to parrot. As they get older it can be explained that using good manners, and certain words make people feel good.
That's pretty much where I come from. I teach my children, through example to my little one (who by the way is FOUR, not even 4 1/2 yet -- not five) and through discussion with my older child, that attitude/vibes are very, very important. For example, when they hurt someone else, "SORRY!" said in an exasperated way due to adult 'enforcement' does not even remotely imply remorse. On the other hand, if they bring a cup of water/ ice pack/ other to the person they hurt (and even SAY nothing), that conveys even more genuine feeling, IMO. Sometimes, that's all a very young
child can do.
I also believe that teaching manners is basically about teaching the ways of showing respect. I
felt disrespected by her insistence toward my son in front of me (as if I wasn't there), and then responded, in a very respectful tone of voice, by telling her my beliefs (since she was obviously telling me her
beliefs, albeit indirectly) and saying 'please' and 'thank you' for the balloon, myself.
Thank you, mamas... It feels good to know that others can see where I'm coming from.