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How about an Adults-Only Forum? - Page 2

post #21 of 140
Quote:
Originally Posted by thismama
I agree with crayon.

Really jeca? They dont see TAO as valuable to the community? I dont get this. TAO is the place where everything goes that would fall thru the cracks, the chatting, the humour. It is one of the busiest forums. I think its existence is integral to community building here.
It dosn't have an actual purpose behind it like the other forums. Breatsfeeding, home care, parenting. etc it's more like a free for all.So I can certainly saee the point that it's not as valuable even if I don't agree.
post #22 of 140
An adults only forum would be fine.

Or I really don't have a problem with no blatant sex talk or profanity in TAO, as I have a 10 year old who sometimes pops in and reads over my shoulder...but where it gets so tricky is the no innuendo or no subtle hints at profanity. I have a hard time distinguishing between what is okay there and what is not okay.

Sometimes TAO is like Captain Underpants books, only we are all adults and instead of potty humor...it is grown-up potty humor. Still funny, probably somewhat tasteles, but not so harmful.

TAO is a place to chat, have fun and blow off steam. You have a large group of high-spirited women.. very indepedent.. really intelligent.. not so concerned with social norms or they wouldn't be here or raising their kids AP/NFL...

I suppose it's not surprising that there would be some pushing of the envelope going on.

Hope there is a way to keep TAO open.
post #23 of 140
I can't think of a better solution so I'd have to agree that perhaps an adult only forum is an answer. I loved TAO and not because I posted that much, but it was a fun place to connect with many people and heck, I always got a good chuckle. I am sore about it being closed.
post #24 of 140
Ruth you are awesome. Thanks for starting this thread.

I'm a member of MANY forums where there will be a folder for profanity and sexual natured talk. It is not password protected nor do you need any amount of posts. There is a warning with the folder that warns people of the nature of the discussions. This would be the only place that profanity and sexual talk was accepted.

I think it would solve all of MDC's problems to be honest. Why be so hard handed and controlling? Why not bend to the community a bit?
post #25 of 140
I'm so confused. In the statement of purpose, it says "first and foremost, for support and information. " Isn't TAO support? And community?

Then, in the User agreement, it says, " Given these guidelines, there is nothing wrong with friendly debate, socializing, and good humor."
Maybe we need a definition of innuendo? Because I don't think anyone is trying to cause trouble for the moderators, but it just seems like the rules are getting stricter and stricter, so something that was OK last week is now getting a post pulled, a thread moved, or a member warned. It's very confusing.

Myself, I am going to be very very very sad if there's no TAO, and I haven't even been around half as long as many here. I can't imagine what we'd all do without this community.
post #26 of 140
Well I read CM's post and it looks like it's only temporarily closed.

I really do value TAO as a source of support and community building. All the innuendo is community building too... it's funny! And rebellious... too bad the dynamic exists where there is some sort of anti sexual "authority" to rebel against.

Why not just make TAO "adults only"?
post #27 of 140
Good Idea Thismama
post #28 of 140
Similar ideas have been brought up here before, but it has always come down to the management fee;ling like this should be a completely "family" friendly site.

personally, i'm blown away (wait, i said blown. is that innuendo? i'm confused) by the fact that we are mostly all mothers by virtue of the fact that we had, yes, SEX, and that we are unable to talk about it here, on a site for mothers.
post #29 of 140
Sex?

I'm still a virgin...

but this is an old post.


Bring back the TOA! And allow adults to speak openly and candidly.
post #30 of 140
Quote:
Originally Posted by eclipse
personally, i'm blown away (wait, i said blown. is that innuendo? i'm confused) by the fact that we are mostly all mothers by virtue of the fact that we had, yes, SEX, and that we are unable to talk about it here, on a site for mothers.
Well I for one didn't get pregnant by having sex. But even my pure self is willing to wade into the trenches with you tramps.
post #31 of 140
I think an adults only forum would be good.

Someone said the get ading pregnant ad was racy. What is racy about a pregnant woman who is covering her breasts?
post #32 of 140
Quote:
Originally Posted by eclipse
personally, i'm blown away (wait, i said blown. is that innuendo? i'm confused) by the fact that we are mostly all mothers by virtue of the fact that we had, yes, SEX, and that we are unable to talk about it here, on a site for mothers.

Speak for yourself (she said primly)


















:LOL
post #33 of 140
Quote:
Originally Posted by jeca
{QOUTE}As stated in the past TAO is a forum MDC provides as a service to the community at the request of members. But when it becomes problematic it becomes a concern, especially when the moderators find themselves spending an excessive amount of time dealing with issues that are really of no benefit to the community as a whole or Mothering' s purpose on the web. As well it creates a lot of bad feelings against the moderators and our administration of the boards.
{QOUTE}

Maybe I am understanding it differantly but it certainly seems to suggest it.I am a bit of a bubblehea I admit so feel free to school me if I am wrong.
I'm wondering if what they mean is that the PTB (owner, admin, and mod team) need to figure out what they truly want the purpose of Mothering on the 'net to be. Has it grown past its original intent, into something they had not invisioned or wanted? Was the original intent for MDC to be primarily, and perhaps only, an information-based site? Or was the purpose for MDC to be community-based, thus taking on all the personality types and discussions that the wide array of members in any community, be it online or offline, could bring? Can it be BOTH?

I totally understand that a LOT of managing of the forums and threads has to go on to keep things running smoothly and happily for the most part. I also know that a LOT more work has been put on the moderators' plates as the site grows in membership, as it changes in scope to meet the changing needs of its membership, and as rules have increased, broadened, and been tested, particularly in TAO. The feeling the need to moderate and 'babysit' (for lack of a better term) more and more must feel really frustrating. BTDT myself elsewhere and have wanted to throw up my hands and give up. (I don't have a T-shirt to show for it, though.) I'm wondering if the question they now have is: Is the amount of physical and emotional energy put into keeping things running as the PTB want MDC to be (yet not necessarily how the community has grown to be) worth the stress on them anymore? KWIM?

That said, I guess I don't understand what happened to cause the innuendo rule to come to fruition to begin with. Were there complaints? (I can understand blatant and descript talk being a problem, so I don't mean explicit stuff.) Did MDC have to ensure its publicly viewable forums adhered to family-friendly content? (again, totally understandable) If that is the case, then a private 'adults forum' where a rule against explicit talk could still apply, would fix both problems. The posts made in that forum would be unable to be spidered by search engines, and members who may be embarrassed or offended by innuendo of any kind (I have a very good friend who is, so I understand it!) could simply avoid the forum. "Click at your own risk." LOL!

Just my blatherings...
post #34 of 140
Quote:
Originally Posted by thismama
Well I for one didn't get pregnant by having sex. But even my pure self is willing to wade into the trenches with you tramps.





:LOL



I would also like to volunteer to mod such a forum.




Or is that like the fox watching the hen house??
post #35 of 140
I really like the Cap't Underpants analogy. hehe And, you know some kindergarten teachers censor that b/c it's too racy?!?! YIKES

I approve and support the idea of a forum labelled adults only and I'm sure we could trust those in our IRL and cyber families to respect that. I mean, we could leave out graphics but still blow off some steam.

And, really, I do agree...we're all here b/c we did have sex at some point in our lives. Some of us more than once. :

I mean really and truly gee whiz it totally torques me to read some of the parenting advice given on some threads but I zip it and pass on by...so, why are people so bent out of shape at harmless (YES) lighthearted fun?
post #36 of 140
Thank you Full of Grace. Very eloquent.

Is the community meeting the needs of the members? Does not appear so.

I wonder what role the rapid growth in membership and the influx of new advertising has in some of the crackdowns.
post #37 of 140
Well, what I would like is to see Parents as Partners become adult only, so we can talk about sex in there. I haven't found a decent place to talk about sex online to normal (read: not horny pervs) people. I don't exactly have many people in real life that I can discuss my sexual issues with. But who am I? *shrug*
post #38 of 140
Quote:
Originally Posted by thismama
Well I for one didn't get pregnant by having sex. But even my pure self is willing to wade into the trenches with you tramps.














:LOL
post #39 of 140
<<<<<<<<<< this is me today.



anyway, i think either making tao for adults only, or creating a new adults only forum are great ideas. don't have much hope in the powers that be, though.





:
post #40 of 140
Quote:
Originally Posted by Persephone
Well, what I would like is to see Parents as Partners become adult only, so we can talk about sex in there. I haven't found a decent place to talk about sex online to normal (read: not horny pervs) people. I don't exactly have many people in real life that I can discuss my sexual issues with. But who am I? *shrug*

this is a great idea as well.
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