Ever been ogled?

[Gidget]

Fil would not let mil nurse dh, but since he was out to sea when bil was born, she did. He has said to me before, when I was having supply issues with dd, that bf wasnt any big deal.
Fastfoward to August last year. Ds2 was 7 months and we moved in with fil until we found a house in the area we moved to. So, I noticed out of the corner of my eye that every time I nursed ds, he would be looking at everyone and talking like nothing was out of place. No biggie, he got used to it right? Well, I thought so for awhile till I noticed that whenever ds decided to pop off or whenever I was latching or unlatching that he would look over quickly to see. Nasty perv. I always knew he was a sick perv, but this really unnerved me. We had our own room and knowing what a perv he is, I would try to nurse Isaac out ther, but there were times when he would want to nurse in the house during dinner.

Now I think I may know why he never wanted mil to nurse. He thinks all men are sickos like him. This is the same guy mind you, who whistled and ogled me when I was 19 and dh and I went out and I was wearing a little black dress.

So, this is partly a vent but I am curious to see if anyone else has actually been ogled while nursing a baby.

[annettemarie]

Yes, actually. I took my baby to the library book sale when he was just a couple of weeks old, and some man kept coming and staring while I nursed the baby. It took all my energy not to squirt the perv.

[ShelleyMom2in2]

No but I did have a bitchy waitress stare at me the entire 20 mins my 2mos old nursed. Every few minutes Id stop eating sit back and stare right back at her, she would get all uppity and look away, then Id go back to eating and shed start staring again. And it wasnt just curious looks, it was mouth open/disgusted look. We asked for a different waitress and left her a big FAT tip!

[willowsmom]

nak

I have also...this guy at my friend's house...stood there, mouth opened, eyes wide...after about 5 minutes of this i asked if he was jealous. he stammered.."no no..." like i had slapped him awake.

some people are so dumb...

[soccerchic21]

I was just recently oogled...or stared at..... recently at a super bowl party. The guy was sort of weird and I couldn't quite read his stare but it made me feel REALLY uncomfortable. DH was sitting right next to me too on the couch. To ease my nerves I just figured he had never seen someone nurse a toddler before.

Sorry your fil is such a perv. Maybe have your DH say something to him if it happens again. Or I guess it would be easier if your DH could catch him in the act and say something.

Sort of OT but I don't understand it when women say "my husband wouldn't let me nurse our baby" thankfully your FIL was away when your hubby was born. A controlling man like that would hate to be married to me LOL!

[Jadzia]

My sister has this on-again/off-again boyfriend who was mostly off-again around the time my son was born. So he hadn't seen the baby yet when we were at my sister's house Xmas Eve. I was nursing DS sitting on the couch when Paul came over. He said "Oh, I haven't seen the baby yet" and walked straight over to me and leaned over to look at Adrian up close. He had no idea I was nursing and was immediately embarrassed and looked away. He later told my sister he was really embarrassed "because he saw my breast".

It's funny how some people can only see a breast and not the baby!

[Gidget]

Originally Posted by soccerchic21

Sorry your fil is such a perv. Maybe have your DH say something to him if it happens again. Or I guess it would be easier if your DH could catch him in the act and say something.

Sort of OT but I don't understand it when women say "my husband wouldn't let me nurse our baby" thankfully your FIL was away when your hubby was born. A controlling man like that would hate to be married to me LOL!

Dh knows too well what he is about. We are glad to be living in our own house now(see my location). We lived there for six months, and as weird as those people are, his pervertedness is the least of the issues around there. I will NEVER leave my kids with them. Dh used to be really defensive of his family uintil we lived there. Now he is the one that gets mad at them first. I amd soooooo glad that mil raised them after the divorce.

Fil was at sea when bil was born. Unfortunately dh was ff'ed. I would not and do not take that either. Dh is supportive of bf until about 5 or so months. He has been harassing me to wean for 11 months now(once or twice a month). He did with April too. You'd think history would teach him I am gonna ignore him.

[Bleu]

That has happened to me, too, Jadzie. A bunch of men have come up, all eager to admire the baby and had no clue he was breastfeeding until they were thisclose. I am pretty discreet -- that is, I make no secret of what we're doing, I just don't want to give anyone a good view of the equipment, so to speak -- so I think they just had no clue whatsoever that he was breastfeeding. Whenever it happenes, I always wonder what I should do. I don't want to be all like "Breastfeeding, stay away!" but then I also don't mean to sucker them into coming, unwittingly, too close for comfort (theirs OR mine).

One in-law guy was cruising in for a good peek and his wife (who breastfed in the 70s, when she had her babies) was behind him going "uh.... Jim'' [no response] "Jim!" [no response] "Jim!!!" [moves in closer] "JIM!!!" [turns around, gives wife a blank look, then turns back and gets all embarassed. Duh. Listen to your wife, buddy.

[chersolly]

I can't believe a momma wouldn't provide their child with the best nutrition possible just because her husband said so! I'd kick my husband's ass if he thought he had control over my breasts.

[slinginhipmama]

I have been ogoled before..in WALMART!!!! I was doing some grocery shopping, with DH and DS#1. Ds #1 was in the sling nursing, as I was walking down the aisle I noticed a sales associate ( middle aged male) gawking at me. I just returned the stare and he left. I thought "ok he got uncomfortable and left good" a few seconds later he was back... with a friend!!!! Another perv!!!! They began to laugh and I started to get really upset, but I didn't have the ovaries to confront theses a**holes!!! Unforntunely DH was in another aisle! Two years later and I still wish I would have reported them to customer service.I definetly would if it happened again!

[Childishgoth]

Originally Posted by slinginhipmama

I have been ogoled before..in WALMART!!!! I was doing some grocery shopping, with DH and DS#1. Ds #1 was in the sling nursing, as I was walking down the aisle I noticed a sales associate ( middle aged male) gawking at me. I just returned the stare and he left. I thought "ok he got uncomfortable and left good" a few seconds later he was back... with a friend!!!! Another perv!!!! They began to laugh and I started to get really upset, but I didn't have the ovaries to confront theses a**holes!!! Unforntunely DH was in another aisle! Two years later and I still wish I would have reported them to customer service.I definetly would if it happened again!

oh oh you should complain to the manager next time, i have friends who work at walmart and a lady complained to the manger and said she had an urge to file a formal complaint but wasnt sure. The guy who oogled her had to give her an appology and she got all her groceries for free!!!

[polka123]

I did meet a few guys (pre DH) online that wanted to know if I was lactating - y'know - a fetish thing. :LOL
of course, I was not.. no babes then
what ever floats your boat :LOL :LOL :LOL

[StarMama]

Bleu, if someone is approaching to see ds (which happened more when he was littler and slinging/nursing/walking/shopping was a lot easier on my back! :LOL) I would just say "Ok, but he is nursing now." or something similar. Sorta a 'hey I don't MIND if you want a peek, but your gonna see boob too!" : Of course this was all to women who wanted to ooooh at him, I don't think I'd be as comfortable with a male stranger coming to sneak a peek while I was nursing (of course strangers who are men don't tend to want to get so close to peek either...).

And yes I was oogled/stared down by an older man at Ikea. I was with friends, and nursing ds in a wrap sling, with my breast pulled out over my shirt (cuz um its kinda hard to get your shirt up with a wrap sling around you, and I'd rather show boob than tummy fat : ) in the elevator. My friend was the one who noticed it, not me, and when she pointed him out he was just STARING at me, standing RIGHT behind me. In a disgusted way, but just STARING. Usually people who are uncomfortable with it don't STARE. They look away. The guy was just creepy. I saw him later in the store again about 10 minutes ago, still nursing, and he did it again. Just STARED at my boob like it was some sort of purple winged and fanged monster breathing fire or something. I mean come on, its just a BOOB! :

[milkymama1104]

Yep. I got ogled a lot by (this is a complicated relationship...) my ex's mother's boyfriend. Finally I just kept giving him the hairy eyeball and he laid off. As a sidenote, my dd is now 15 mos and this same guy told me that she shouldn't still be bf because mammals should wean when they get teeth! :LOL Now, I'm so casual about whipping out the ol' milk bags that I don't even notice any odd looks. I've even been known to walk out of the house with a breast hanging out and not notice it until someone looks at me funny...

[Belle]

I got oogled at Costco. My dd was less than a week old and I wasn't experienced enough to NIP yet. So I went to go nurse her in my car while my dh finished shopping. A man in the car next to me saw what I was doing and took his time while he was loading his groceries into his car. This guy was really creepy. He couldn't take his eyes off my car. Even after he loaded finished loading his groceries he stood there and stared at me. I wished that I had stayed in costco and nursed her there. I was so relieved when my dh got back and that creepy guy stopped staring at me.

[shishkeberry]

I would have given that the finger.

[~*max*~]

Originally Posted by chersolly

I'd kick my husband's ass if he thought he had control over my breasts.

: Thanks chersolly! I needed a laugh this morning. I feel the same way, but I love the way you put it!

[crunchy_mama]

Well, I've been oogled, but didn't realize it until later. I seen a guy I worked with before when I was out with Luke one day nursing him in the sling. Later another guy I had worked with called me and told me how he had to tell everybody that he seen my boob and describe it for them. I was sooo disgusted and dissapointed. I had found out after I left this place of employment that my underwear evidently were good topics of discussion for a fellow employee and my boss- so I guess I shouldn't have been surprised...

[velcromom]

I felt ogled once, I was in the dr's office waiting room nursing ds and a guy across from me kept looking. I couldn't decide if it was creepy or not, so I met his eyes and he looked away. But I kept my eye on him and noticed that when I moved to unlatch ds, he looked over so I think he was trying to catch a glimpse. His plan was foiled though, because I had chosen a longer shirt over a tank to nurse in that day, and my shirttail fell down over my breast as ds pulled away - he saw nothing. I was irked but chuckling that he thought he'd glance over at the "right second" but didn't see a thing anyway.

[Chelly2003]

Originally Posted by milkymama1104

I've even been known to walk out of the house with a breast hanging out and not notice it until someone looks at me funny...

:LOL - I had to check to make sure I didn't write that..............I'm nak'ing now and trying SO hard not to laugh....................... all that shaking wakes DD up!
:LOL
Chelly