im so mad need some advice

[mommy love]

Ive only posted once before my ds has just turned 4 months on the 22 march he is only breastfed sleeps with mommy and daddy doesent take a sus and no solids he ways a good 20 pounds

my inlaws are very pushy on cerials becouse ds is very interested on our foods and as allways inlaws want me to stop breastfeeding bye 6 months : : : im so mad and just need a little saport on im doing the write thing im not ready to stop and not at all planing to use can milk for my ds im so mad i just want to cry even dh is saying maybe its better to stop at 6 months DOES nobody understand how i feel not only is ds not ready im not ready eathier im a stay at home mom thank you anyone who can give me a picker upper i need it

[Mom4tot]

mommy love. That sounds like an awful lot of pressure Your dh and in laws need some education about the benefits of breastfeeding and the WHO recc.'s to breastfeed for at least 2 years. Can you simply say that your ped advises nursing as long as possibe...atleastinto the second year...that might buy you some time.

You are doing a wonderful thing for your baby and you have to remember to listen to your instincts about YOUR baby, not what other people tell you. 4 momths is still young to start solids...there are many signs to look for, like sitting up on his own, not spitting too much food back out. It isn't always determined by age. Even once he does eat a little bit of solids, remember that breastmilk is still his primary source of nutrition...you should nurse first, then offer the food (which doesn't have to be cereal). Best of luck...you have fond a great place for support and encouragement!

[alegna]

Hugs! You're doing the right thing. There is no substitute for your milk. Why on earth would you give your child something substandard when you have the very best stuff on earth right on tap? You know better than they do. Hold your head high and ignore those ignorant folks. Keep on doing what's right for your babe!

good job mama!

-Angela

[TiredX2]

First: I am so sorry you are getting a bad reaction to you trying to do the best for your child.

Secondly, IMO this is a matter between you and your child. Even if your DH disagrees with you HE needs to tell his parents to back off or face the consequences. He should not be siding against you.

Your DH needs to come up with specific reasons, backed by research and medicine as to why you should wean at six months. That is not, as far as I know, recommended by ANY pediatric society world wide. If he can not come up with a *real* reason, then he also needs to back off.

I'm really sorry you are dealing with this

Kay

[NYCVeg]

Here's some info on delaying solids you can give them:
http://www.kellymom.com/nutrition/so...ay-solids.html

At the end of the day, though, don't be afraid to tell them it's none of their business (nicely, if you want! ). They got to raise their kids. You get to raise yours.

[annettemarie]

You are a wonderful mother who is absolutely giving your child the most wonderful gift in the world! Show them the new AAP statement- even the doctor's say no solids til 6 months!! I have a great booklet from LLL- if you email/pm me your addy I can send it to you.

[Lula's Mom]

Here's a link to that AAP statement if you'd like to show it to them.

http://pediatrics.aappublications.or...115/2/496#SEC6

Read #10: "Pediatricians and parents should be aware that exclusive breastfeeding is sufficient to support optimal growth and development for approximately the first 6 months of life and provides continuing protection against diarrhea and respiratory tract infection. Breastfeeding should be continued for at least the first year of life and beyond for as long as mutually desired by mother and child.
There is no upper limit to the duration of breastfeeding and no evidence of psychologic or developmental harm from breastfeeding into the third year of life or longer."

Far from being harmful, it's a wonderful thing.

[bri276]

If I were president, the first thing I would do is a REQUIRED breastfeeding information class in high school!!!! GRRRR!!!

you're doing the right thing. They're wrong. It's that simple.

[mom2emerson]

Hang in there. I don't and can't understand why someone WOULDN'T breastfeed!!!

a) Know that you ARE doing the right thing. There are so many women (and men...don't want to count them out) that will support you. LLL a great resource for info. I'd suggest going on line and finding a local chapter or leader who can provide you with facts to back you up as well as emotional and social support.

b) Your inlaws need to BACK OFF. Ugh, easier said then done, I know. One mantra/phrase I've found myself saying to mine is "...wow, that is really interesting. Thanks for the input, but I am comfortable with the way I am parenting my child." and yes, I do have to bite my lip and try and say that sincerely and not with the biting sarcasm that I am really feeling!!!!!

My DD is 13 mo old now. We waited until 7-8 mo to introduce food. She just wasn't interested. When we did introduce food it was a long and slow process for her. Another friend introduced food at 5 mos BUT her child was SO obviously ready (reaching for her food, etc). The key is that YOU know your child and YOU are doing what is best for him.

[mommy love]

[e-mail] thank you so much you dont understand what means to me ty so much

Originally Posted by annettemarie

You are a wonderful mother who is absolutely giving your child the most wonderful gift in the world! Show them the new AAP statement- even the doctor's say no solids til 6 months!! I have a great booklet from LLL- if you email/pm me your addy I can send it to you.

[mommy love]

thank you so much everyone it means alote for your advice its not easy all the pressure and to know i have saport helps me hold my head high i know its better what im doing and all your advice i can say i will use with joy sooooooooooooooo happy your all there

[Siana]

Since you are in Quebec you can give your in-laws a copy of this:
Exclusive Breastfeeding Duration - 2004 Health Canada Recommendation
http://www.hc-sc.gc.ca/hpfb-dgpsa/on...uration_e.html

Also, I feel that you need to remind your husband that he needs to trust your instincts as a mother (you are obviously instinctive and smart ). I know there is plenty of social pressure on him to conform as well, but by having him as your breastfeeding support, it will make mothering your baby so much easier.

[hubris]

What a rough situation, I'm sorry you're in it right now. I agree with Kay that your DH needs to stand up to his parents and tell them that what/how you feed your child is not their business and that they need to CUT IT OUT. It's inappropriate for them to disregard/disrespect your family's plans so much, and also inappropriate for them to campaign for formula or cereal to your DH, putting him in a tight spot between you and them.

Definitely hand them a copy of the info from the AAP and/or Kellymom and/or other sites.

And maybe acknowledge their feelings a little...something like "I understand that you're concerned about your grandchild's health, and we appreciate your concern. It's wonderful that you care so much. I want to reassure you that continuing to breastfeed DS will NOT harm him, and that in fact it will benefit him...here's some information that you might find interesting to read." If they keep at it, you or DH may need to say "I'm sorry that you disagree, but this is not open for debate. Thank you for respecting and supporting us by not discussing this again."

It stinks, but drawing a line and sticking to it really does work most of the time. We had to do it a LOT with my in-laws when Griff was an infant. They pushed and pushed on a lot of different issues, and DH finally let them know that what they were doing was inappropriate. They challenged that, he stuck to his guns, and they learned that NO means NO, and they backed off. Our relationship with them is soooo much better now. Sometimes our parents need parenting...we have to set limits and stick to them!

[Viola]

PM all of us with your ILs address, and we'll mail them articles and tear off sheets and pamphlets about breastfeeding and solids and all that. I'll be sure to use my return address labels so they don't think you sent them. :LOL

Tell them to back the hell off! They had their kids and they aren't the parent of your child! Sorry, I am not much help, but the thought of my ILs telling me when to stop breastfeeding makes me just want to punch them in the nose! (I'm violent today, pay me no mind).

[mommy love]

i hear you no problem i feel the same way punch them in there nose and i pay attention how you feel for sure it helps me know im not alone on feeling the same way :LOL

Originally Posted by Viola

PM all of us with your ILs address, and we'll mail them articles and tear off sheets and pamphlets about breastfeeding and solids and all that. I'll be sure to use my return address labels so they don't think you sent them. :LOL

Tell them to back the hell off! They had their kids and they aren't the parent of your child! Sorry, I am not much help, but the thought of my ILs telling me when to stop breastfeeding makes me just want to punch them in the nose! (I'm violent today, pay me no mind).

[mommy love]

thank you

thank u all for your saport i will use it and am very anxiouse to once again stand up for what i know is better for ds and i allthough pressure is hard i had a talk with dh and hes still on side of inlaws but says if i dont stop what can he do (i say Nothing) his mother is just very on his back so he finds it hard but it was all his idea breastfeeding and i have no thoughts on stoping its really nice to have you all good luck to me he he im having a good day no phone calls from mother inlaw to all of u