My three year old is TERRIFIED of bugs!!

[homebirthing]

I don't know what to do. She screams and flips out if a fly is even close to her. Not to mention beetles or bugs of all shapes and sizes. And if there is a spider...whoa! She will hit the roof. I have told her that all of these things are going to be outside all summer long, and that she will have to get used to it, but she doesn't listen at all. I have tried holding the spiders and letting them crawl on my hand, but she doesn't care, she is terrified. And don't get me started on bees!!

Any ideas? She can't stay inside all summer. We live in Minnesota and we are in way too much in the winter as is...

[Vermillion]

No help, sorry. I just wanted to say that *I* can not stand most bugs (spiders? : ) but my 3 year old adores bugs and will bring every one he finds to me. :

I’d like to be in your position. :LOL

[angelpie545]

Hi, although I don't have a solution to your problem, I do want to share the fact that my when my oldest daughter was about 2-3 she had exactly the same fears, only it was towards all animals, not just spiders and insects. She would scream and yell, shake, climb on things, ext...............but then she slowly got over it, little by little, and now she simply sidesteps bugs if she sees them. So there is hope yet, mama, and I know exactly how frustrating it can be, especially if you are in public. Most kids get over these things in time.

[Yummymummy74]

I think is a very common 3 year old thing to have an aversion to bugs :LOL both my younger sons have gone through this and it was anything from spiders to ants! eventually they do get over it and now my 3 year old is obsessed with spiders he really loves them.. when a few months ago they provoked terror in him!

I just always explained that the bugs were so small they would not hurt him and then gave him interesting facts about them, eventually he became interested.. also when we find a bug (spider ect ) in our home we always carefully place it outside.. I have taught my kids respect even for mother earths smallest lifeforms! :LOL

I am sure its a phase and it will pass in good time

[oldcrunchymom]

Originally Posted by DoulaSarah

I have tried holding the spiders and letting them crawl on my hand, but she doesn't care, she is terrified.

: I got faint just reading that. Eek!

Spiders aside, my daughter went through a phase of about a couple years where she was terrified of ants. And I mean paralyzed with fear, unable to do do anything except stand stock still and screech terrified. Fortunately she now seems to be getting over it, which is good since there are lots of ants around here! I think as long as you model your current behavior of not showing fear, then she'll probably get over most of her fears.

Spiders are hideous beasts, though.

[~*max*~]

Can she verbalize why she is afraid? That might give you some ideas as to how to help. Is it a new fear? I would try to respect her feelings, but not play into them iykwim. Do still go outside and do all the fun things you normally do, and when a fear presents itself, very calmly support her through it.

Does she enjoy make believe play? Maybe you could give her a small spray bottle filled w/water and an EO (to make it smell nice) and tell her it is "bug away spray", make up fun & silly ways to use it, etc. I know some people feel this type of thing teaches kids here is something to fear, but she is already terrified, so maybe it would help her feel empowered.

Good luck.

[witch's mom]

My daughter went through this. It was at its peak when she was 3, and it started because an insect landed on her at the park. She never wanted to go to that park again that summer, but the bug fears did die down after the first month of spring's extra-buggy conditions. I thought she was over it, but then when the bugs hatched again in the spring when she was 4, her fears kicked up again. She didn't even want to play outside. Now she's 5, spring is here, and she has talked a lot about insects--asks lots of questions about spiders and flies and bees, do they sting, where do they come from, how she wishes they weren't here--but she's not been hysterical about them like she has been the past two years. I don't think she's ever going to be one of these kids that is willing to hold the giant hissing Madagascar crickets at the science fair, but she definitely has outgrown her hysteria about insects--just as she outgrew her hysteria about monkeys and trains and garbage trucks.

And as much as I appreciated everyone's good intentions and advice, NOTHING made her more comfortable around bugs. If there were bugs at the park, we had to leave. If there were teeny fruit flies in the backyard, we had to come indoors. It felt very limiting, especially when I looked ahead and imagined an entire summer spent indoors nursing this child's irrational fears. But, really, it lessened as the bug population evened out, and especially as she grew up and got more verbal about expressing her trepidation about bugs.