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"Unconditional Parenting" by Alfie Kohn - Page 8

post #141 of 151
Thread Starter 
I'm all over getting this conversation going again. Regardless of the Yahoo thread, I think this is an important book to discuss here at MDC.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pigpen
I wish I had this book when my first was a baby.
Pigpen, this is my ONLY regret about this wonderful book: that it wasn't published in 2001! Oh, and the fact that I don't actually OWN a copy yet. I've been fortunate enough to have had the library's copy of couple of times and I believe I've read it cover to cover at least twice and then some. It's in my top three of parenting books!

The best,
Em
post #142 of 151
:LOL My kids are 2 & 4 and I'm so bummed, too! I told dh the first half of the book describes me and the 2nd half saves me. I hope my 4 year old can recover.

I feel like I fall in his middle category. First he gives the popular, negative, reaction. Then, he says, "Wellllll, now some folks think xxxx is a better alternative BUT.... " and he shows why it's still negative. Pseudo choices are a great example of this.

I bought the book for vacation and was bummed to pay the $ but I am very happy that we have it as a resource to keep and to share.
post #143 of 151
I just finished it and I love it.

I think it will help me better articulate what dh and are doing. So many times I have said I don't do 'outcome based' parenting.

IMO, this is a very important book.
post #144 of 151
Quote:
Originally Posted by UUMom
I think it will help me better articulate what dh and are doing. So many times I have said I don't do 'outcome based' parenting.
I like that...I love how clearly he makes the point in the book that most parents hope their children grow up to be independent, happy adults but the way they parent (punishment, shame, authoritative) will most likely end up raising them to be something entirely different. So many people care about the immediate results. Compliance = good parenting. Instead of thinking long term. This is exactly where I was for a long time.
post #145 of 151
I started reading this months ago, then put it aside because of a book club obligation, and other "must read" recommendations. Now that I'm back to it, I wish I hadn't put it down!!

I think this is my all-time-favorite parenting book.

Quote:
I think it will help me better articulate what dh and are doing.
Yeah--there's nothing wrong with parenting by gut feelings, but it's nice to read something from someone who's thought it through on an intellectual level and tie it all in together.
post #146 of 151
Bump.



Came across the "tribe" in FYT and it linked to here.



Am finally reading "Easy to Love ..." by B. Bailey cover to cover (had taken it out of the library some time back and just sort of read it on the fly, a page here and a page there ... now bought myself a copy and started with page 1) and am so fired up about it, it's in my head all day ... and now you've piqued my interest to read "Unconditional Parenting" ... first parenting book I've been inspired to get in a while just from a thread.

So little time, so many pages. :LOL

So a bump.

post #147 of 151
Me! Me, too! I just started reading this book and will have to -gulp- plow through this whole, long thread. Hoping that there will be some useful, concrete ideas for translating this (so far) fairly philosophical text into actionable ideas for parenting a toddler.
post #148 of 151
Sorry, but what is the title? I may be blind, but can't seem to find it
Nevermind it's the title! OK rugh morning here
post #149 of 151
:
post #150 of 151
bumping since I'm late to the discussion
post #151 of 151
FYI, Kohn has a DVD for this book too; it's a seminar with him speaking. Might help for partners who don't read as much. =)
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