Spinoff Thread for hsing with chronic illness disabilities in response to leaves post

[CerridwenLorelei]

Edited for a family's safety


I have fibromyalagia, interstitial cystitis, migraines, barrets esophagus, a few other things so

Really down days you can bedschool, if you do tv you can let him watch some educational dvds/videos
unschool for that day -set up an area close by you with paints, blocks, books, other building materials etc
Eductional games/programs on the pc
If he does have aspergers you can get therapies through private insurance or medicaid if you have it as well as for the SID
I have one on the autism spectrum and he would not function well in a classroom

if you have more specific questions I will try and answer them the best I can

[Ruthla]

I was actually coming here to ask about this!!

In another thread, I had posted about wanting my children in a Jewish Day School but not being able to afford it, and sending them to public school even though I'm not 100% comfortable with the idea. Then I got a PM from an old friend (an actual IRL friend I met at LLL shortly after my 2nd baby and her twins were born) and she suggested HS as an alternative to public school.

It seems that I've thought about HSing numerous times during my career as a mother (starting when I was pg with my first) and I keep deciding against it then thinking about it again.

Here's the deal: I have FMS and depression (depression is currently under control) and I put ds in full time preschool this year because I wasn't really able to care for him all day- I couldn't run around with him outside, and he spent way too much time in front of the TV because I was too exhausted to move.

My youngest and oldest are thriving in school; Hannah is not. She needs to eat regularly or she gets cranky, irritable, and defiant- at school they limit the times she's allowed to eat. Then, often they offer foods she shouldn't have (we're on the Feingold Program) and she'll often eat them because she's hungry- with resultant behavioral issues for the next week or so.

This morning she had a huge tantrum because she couldn't find anything she wanted to wear, and I ended up taking her to school 2 hours late. It was VERY stressful.

So- here are a few questions: How DO you handle being with your kids all day without a break? How do you get your own errands done? When do you get time for yourself?

Would it be too much to HS when I'm so sick myself?

Can I really afford to HS? I'm honestly not sure if I'm healthy enough to work (as in paid employment) or not. I'm barely squeeking by on child support right now.

[guest^]

Ruth-(((((HUGS))))

You have so much on your plate!!

I have endometriosis stage 4,and depression and anxiety issues. So, some days are better than ever, some arehorrible, and some are baaad. Let me see if I can help a little.

DD is 8yo and ds is 3.5yo. I have HSed dd since Kinder. She is in 2nd grade.

~Some days I don't have a break at all-right now my dh is working from 6am-8pm M-TH. I feel like a single mom in some ways. On the days that I don't get much of a break, I try my hardest getting them both to bed really early. If I do get a break, it is because ds takes a nap-this is almost everyday. During that time, I will cover any one-on-one hsing time I need to do with dd,keeping it short. Then I either walk on my treadmill and/or rest,read or come here. I rarely do housework during that time-so yes, my house is always messy. Usually when they go to bed, I follow shortly after-as I have to focus on my sleep.

~Since I have no family here, I will do my errands on the weekends so dh can stay with them. Or I ask friends for help.(Hey!Are you going to target or co-op? Can you pick up such and such for me?)

~I don't get a lot of time to myself. Our schedules and my health don't really allow for it at this time. I settle for less you could say. I do have a lot of people ask me "how I do it", and I don't really have the answer, I just do it. I suppose I lower my expectations, and live a simple life. My idea of getting time to myself, is escaping the family for little chunks. I will stretch my errands to include a stop at B&N to browse,go to a few thrift stores(this is actually relaxing to me), or just go to my bedroom and use my free mins talking to my sisters or Mom or StepMom. Since I have panic issues, I don't like to be away from my dc for very long-mostly ds since he is so little. My dh is deaf in one ear, so I rarely leave ds with him for long.

~I can't answer whether it would be too much for you to HS. Perhaps you have to try it for a year to find out? Given that you are a single Mom, and you have older and small dc, I would think it easier to HS all of them, instead of having to meet schools time schedules and your own. Your 10yo could read to or play with your ds while you do HSing with Hannah or clean house. I think this issue is really a give and take. For myself, it would be impossible for me to put my dc in school at this time. I would be a teachers worse nightmare as I would question everything. I would never get my dc to school everyday. And on the days I did, they would be late. My sleep comes before just about everything. I am of no use if I have to get up and get going to anything early. I have a hard time getting dd to ballet on Sat. mornings at 10:15!! From speaking to friends, there is a whole bag of troubles you get when you put your dc in school. At this time, I would prefer to deal with my own troubles than others AND mine! I schedule our schooling (or at least how we do it) accordinbg to my health-and I don't discuss this with dd as I don't want to make my issues hers. For ex: last night, I had severe pain over my right ovary-absolutely debilitating. Today, my body is in recovery mode, as I only treat my anxiety/insomnia issues and not any pain issues. I regulate how I am doing by the severity of pain I experience. So today, both dc are sick with colds and/or allergies, and we have done no schooling. We normally don't watch tv M-F, but today is a tv day. I feel no guilt, as I am confident that we will make up for it later in the week.

~HSing is a big business. You can spend thousands or you can spend a couple hundred$$$'s. I buy almost everything used,so that helps a lot. IMHO- all you really need is a library card, and the internet. I know, as I have a friend who unschools, and those are her top 2 tools for education. But, you really need to hang out here or other HSing boards to learn about/hear about various curricula.

~Since you are a person of Faith, I would say to pray about it, and lower your expectations. Hannah could have been done with schooling at home with all the time she took to agree on something to wear! I spend about 1.5 hrs with dd and she spends1.5 alone reading or doing math.

FYI-your Hannah sounds like my dd!!!! :LOL

And......this post was a mommmy break for me!!! Thankyou!!!

mp

[CerridwenLorelei]

also some moms will

hire a mothers helper from a homeschool community
sometimes you can trade -they help you in return for tutoring/learning to cook/etc
Sometimes you can find a child development college student who can get credit for things like mother's helper. You sign some paperwork for them and they get class credit and usually do an evaluation on them
some CI moms do what they can to trade off with each other on good days
even though they are few and far between..

Can you apply for SSI? I was told to try for it instead of disability due to spotty work record. They turned me down on dh's income and my surgery came during the appeal time so I am going to wait and try again next month for both me and ds

and I don't know if food stamps are an option to apply for? I was told when I was denied SSI by the SA to apply for them and when I got denied I could reapply for SSI not sure why ..

Just trying to think of ways to help with the $$ aspect..

Used curriculum is out there to purchase and like the pp said the net has a ton of stuff
its a fee for the year but I like edhelper for supplments when I feel horrid but check out the sticky at the top of the forum for free links and sites to check into

[guest^]

CL!!! What a great idea!! Our University has an awesome child development program. I am going to call there this week and see if I can get some help!!

THanks for the thread-I hope today was a good day.

mp

[leavesarebrown]

I just went to a homeschooling resources meeting hosted by my local API chapter that was GREAT. A couple experienced homeschooling moms gave info about the laws, the school districts, and resources, including support groups, activities, websites, etc. It was great!!! Find out who else homeschools in your neck of the woods. I think that will make homeschooling much easier having that support.

[CerridwenLorelei]

even if you are moving I would

DOCUMENT now the relative for your records having done this to the other one
It will show that this person makes reports that are a waste of time and does so just because
not because there is true cause kwim?
That way if something happens you have this in place to show that this person is just vindictive for things said person disagrees with

.

[CerridwenLorelei]

oh and some of us are hsing special needs while

dealing with ours too
gets interesting sometimes