13th birthday

[Arduinna]

My dd is going to be 13 in a couple weeks. We are having a party but I was wondering if anyone did anything special to mark the event of becoming a teen??

[Sierra]

When I turned thirteen, my older sisters took me to the park, read me poetry, and gave me thirteen carnations. With each carnation they gave me, they shared a wish for me or a memory of me as a kid. They wrote me a really funny and cute card, too, and they gave me a choice of three special coming-of-age gifts they had chosen. Then they took me shopping for the gift I had chosen. It was a really special day for me.

[Arduinna]

Thanks Sierra! What wonderful sisters you have. And what a great idea!

[RainbowMom]

My son turned 13 in April, and while I didn't do anything more special than usual, I did give him the book The Thundering Years which is a book for teens affirming the positive power and potential of the teen years. Also, my dh and I made a pact that we would work hard to avoid making any derogatory teenage years comments in our house, not so easy to do somethimes in a culture in which the angst of teen years is always overriding the joy. There are many ideas for rituals and rites of passage in the book, and I thought my son might rather choose one for himself for another year than have us plan it for him, in keeping with respecting his growing toward adulthood. It is nice, though to recognize this time in a positive way since our culture is really lacking in rituals that native and other cultures have used for years to welcome their children into the adult community. Let us know what you decide to do and how your dd liked it!

Blessings,

[DaryLLL]

I didn't do anything for my dd's 13th b-days, arduinna, but we did have little parties when they had their first moontimes. A gift, and talking about what it meant to be a woman.

Now my ds is 11. boys don't have as obvious a time of coming of age. I don't know if he will actually tell me when he has his first ejaculation?!!

My dh and oldest dd have started attending the local UU church, which seems to have a coming of age ceremony, which is tied into some kind of mentoring program. don't know too much about it yet. But I do think a mentor is a good thing.