My son asked for condoms!!

[razzledbrat]

First...

Hi ladies! ha!

So glad I found this forum! hahaha!

Now....

I am a mom of 3 and pg with #4.

My kids ages are 18, 15 and 10.

My 18 & 10 years old are my daughters

My 15 year old is my son.

I have always been pretty open regarding birth control, sex & drugs. Because my parents were not. Therefore,,,I didnt know! I ended up pg at 17 and thought it was the flu! ha

I think its very important to be open with your kids so when the time comes...they will talk to you.

Welp...been there and done that with dd#1.

and just a few minutes ago my 15 year old son said...

Mom....I need some "jimmies'

I said...whats a jimmy

he said...condoms..remember...you said if I need them....

i interrupted and said ok - no questions asked and walked away!


OMG OMG OMG OMG!!

hahahaha!

What do I do?? buy them I guess, but do I talk to him about it? should I ask..who's the gal??? I mean...he hasnt brought any steady girls home, he has been "kinda" dating this one lil gal and I havent even met her! What size?? small I assume?? how do I know??? omg..does he know how to use it??? haha OMG!

Why is this freaking me out?

I've been there and done that with dd, but she seemed much older and much more mature. She was also 15, but seemed wayyyyy more responsible, ya know?

uggg!

ok...thanks for listenin to me freak out! Talk to u soon!

Razzledbrat!

[AmandaBL]

I have 3 boys and am dreading this day from the mom perspective. From the rational adult perspective, I hope my kids can ask me something like that.

As for, what to do...... well..... buy them obviously. Beyond that I don't know. I'd maybe remind that even if the girl (??? I'm assuming) goes on the pill, he STILL MUST use condoms. I'd ask him if there was anything he needed to know or needed help with. Planned parenthood has some good pamphlets you could give him too.

I have a friend who emailed her son who lives in the same house because it was easier to talk like that & it gave her a minute to control her shock & maintain composure!! haha

Good luck mama!!!!

[Simplicity]

I must say, I love that you have such open communication with your children. I believe that to be very important! I would make sure he doesn't have any questions though, and remind him that he must use it every time and to be SAFE!

[girlndocs]

Good for him and good for you!

ETA: if you don't know if he knows how to use them, yeah, I think that would be a good idea to ask about, since apparently their effectiveness rate goes down pretty sharply if they're not used correctly.

How do you think he'd react if you asked him a couple casual questions about his, um, friend? (Do you know for sure it's a girl?)

[lunamegn]

I would chat with him about it. It might be embarassing, but since he was open with you, you should be open with him.

I remember when I was in high school I knew this guy whose mother would have a talk with her son's girlfriend, talk to her about birth control - find out if she was using any, and then encourage her to use some... as well as her son. It sounded mortifying at the time, but at the same time I remember being really impressed and wowed that his mother would do that.

I think it's great that he's coming to you.

[TiredX2]

I don't have a teen, but...

You might also want to contact your local health clinic and find out about their policies. Then, pass on that information to your son to share with his friends (our local one always had free condoms, virtually free other birth control, if he is becomming intimate w/a girl she really should get a PAP, etc...).

That's so great your son came to you, though

[willowsmom]

Hi!! And welcome!!!

I don't have teenagers yet...but I remember being one. And my mother and I did NOT have this type of relationship...she thought sex was evil and I was going to be roasting in hell anyway...:eyeroll:

That being said and out of the way...

KUDOS to you and your son for having a relationship where he can come to you with this!!! I want my daughter to feel this comfortable with me when she's older...because I'd much rather KNOW she's protected than have her hiding it and winding up with an STD...kwim? So...My suggestions....buy the condoms...and like TiredX2 said...maybe contact someone to get you some more information on sex and the like.

Again....Way to go. And congrats on having a teenage son who is open with his mom.

[paquerette]

Maybe do the banana demonstration and have him show you that he can put one on a banana? (Do YOU know how to use them? If you've never had to, you might have to learn yourself first. ). My teen brother beat me to parenthood because he couldn't use one correctly. The sex ed in our high school wasn't that comprehensive.

[Stardancer]

My boys are still small but I sure hope that when the time comes they come to ask me too!

[lab]

Originally Posted by razzledbrat

First...

Hi ladies! ha!

So glad I found this forum! hahaha!

Now....

I am a mom of 3 and pg with #4.

My kids ages are 18, 15 and 10.

My 18 & 10 years old are my daughters

My 15 year old is my son.

I have always been pretty open regarding birth control, sex & drugs. Because my parents were not. Therefore,,,I didnt know! I ended up pg at 17 and thought it was the flu! ha

I think its very important to be open with your kids so when the time comes...they will talk to you.

Great first post! I agree with you completely and receive a little backlash from my friends for it. I'm the 'radical' in my circle. All the mothers of girls say that they won't let their girls go out with my ds11! And all because I announced that I would give my kids condoms!

Good for you!

It is important! I have decided that I will simply place a basket of condoms already torn apart under their bathroom sink. Originally, I was going to get a box. Then dh pointed out that I would freak when I noticed it open. So I figured I would just open it, but then my sister said I might count them. So I decided just to get a basket and throw some in and let it go!

That's my plan anyway : We'll see how it goes when the time comes! Perhaps I should wait on them to ask........ if I just put some in there then I guess the baby would have them too, huh? Oh lord, what if they start handing them out to friends......... I'll be the cool mom for all kinds of reasons!!!!

Welp...been there and done that with dd#1.

and just a few minutes ago my 15 year old son said...

sounds like it worked!

Mom....I need some "jimmies'

I said...whats a jimmy

ahhhh c'mon mom! You don't remember jimmy caps!

What do I do?? buy them I guess, but do I talk to him about it? should I ask..who's the gal??? I mean...he hasnt brought any steady girls home, he has been "kinda" dating this one lil gal and I havent even met her! What size?? small I assume?? how do I know??? omg..does he know how to use it??? haha OMG!

Why is this freaking me out?

perhaps it's freaking you out a little more because he's boy? Or maybe it's because the oldest is always more responsible (at least in our eyes) and we tend to 'grow them up' quicker........

Grab a basket and throw some in mama!

[teachermom]

if you do just put them in a basket...be sure to replace them if they do not get used w/i the year. condoms get old and are at higher risk of busting.

[AmandaBL]

I know the Planned Parenthoods here gives away condoms. They also sell them REALLY cheap - I can't remember the price, but it was really low. I like the basket idea. I'm storing that one for when my DH (now 6) is bigger. I'll stock that basket with all kinds of "embarassing" usefull info to - haha

[Jennifer Z]

He might not seem as responsible to you, but at least he is responsible enough to ask for them. That is a major accomplishment in and of itself! At least he will minimize the chance of having to be responsible for a baby this way.

[PoppyMama]

I agree that a trip to PP would be a good idea. They will explain how to use condoms properly and increase their effectiveness with spermicides. If he is going to be sexually active he will need to know where to go to be tested for STD's so it would be a good idea to get him acquainted with the place.

It is great that he feels comfortable coming to you!

[SabrinaJL]

That's so cool that he actually came to you and asked. Me and DH are raising my little brother (well, not so little anymore, he is now 17). He asks us and we supply them.

When I told my best friend that she was shocked and thought it was weird. But she also told her 13 year old daughter that when she (the daughter) starts having sex, to just say her periods were really bad and she needed to be on the pill. She told her daughter she didn't want to know that she was having sex. I was like "ummm, great way to get your daughter to communicate with you".

I also talk to my brother constantly about STD's, pregnancy and whatnot. I will do the same for DD when the time comes.

[Caroline248]

Originally Posted by AmandaBL

I like the basket idea. I'm storing that one for when my DH (now 6) is bigger. I'll stock that basket with all kinds of "embarassing" usefull info to - haha

Hmmm, I would think your DH would be big enough by now.... :LOL

Sorry, couldn't resist that typo!!

[UUMom]

I think I would bring him to the store, give him the money, but have him go to the checkout himself. If he's too embarrassed to buy condoms...

That said, I have talked a lot to my older kids about sex, esp my 16 yr old. My 16 yr old knows I think waiting is another excellent option. I am encouraging and explaining why. What does 'wait' actually mean? Um....college? :LOL Although i am not stupid, either.

Thankfully, his girlfriend is grounded for life right now... And I have told my teen there is a reason he doesn't have the arms of a T - Rex. (Go ahead, think about what that might mean... )

Troll

[Itlbokay]

Welcome!

I think it's great you kept your composure, around him.

I went to my Dad about getting birth control pills when I was a little older than your son, my parents freaked and I ended up getting them behind their backs.

I would have rathered it if they had been a bit more open with me, as it was really hard for me to open up and talk to my Dad about it in the first place. Also, I had totally opened the door for them to talk seriously with me about sex and the repercussions of it. They are pretty open people, I think the idea of their daughter having sex freaked them out though.

[boston]

Originally Posted by razzledbrat

What size?? small I assume?? how do I know???

For the love of Maude please do not buy him small condoms! Just get regular sized ones. :LOL

[PoppyMama]

Originally Posted by boston

For the love of Maude please do not buy him small condoms! Just get regular sized ones. :LOL

:LOL :

Nothing could take the blood out of an erection faster than a boy knowing his own mother thinks he has a small penis.