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Mamas Surviving Cancer... NEW THREAD -May - Page 2

post #21 of 245
Thread Starter 
myrrhmaid..I have to ask...does the mj help with the nausea?
I am so sorry about your hair..wow..that is very long!

As for diet, I was not put on any restrictions, but I ate a lot of veggies and fruits before my illness;so now I am just really adding more of those to my diet.

BUT the blasted chemo has made me crave soda-something I normally never drink, and I have awful cravings like cheeze pizza, or wendy's chicken spicy sandwhich. The days after chemo, I feel like a nasty hangover and the only way I feel better is by eating. Just like I need something in my stomach or I will barf if I don't. I do not feel nauseated after I eat. SO thanks to that, I have gained weight and the last time they had me in the hospital I put on 10lbs due to the fluids they pumped me full of and the steriods they gave me. So I am not happy. I am about 10-15+ to much. :

I am curious thou for those of us who have had to turn to bottles..now with the weather warming up do you still give your babies warm bottles or do you give them a little cooler? I went to a Pampered Chef party and this mom there said she fills a pitcher full of formula and keeps it in the fridge. I did not ask her details, but I am curious how she warms it up? I pre-make my bottles in the morning for the day, but do not add the water until dd is ready for one. What are you guys doing?

post #22 of 245
That's so funny about the cravings. A couple of weeks ago, I just had to have french fries!

Myrrh, do you think the MJ helps? I'm glad that you made a decision about your hair. I hope that you are pleased with it. They did tell me I couldn't eat sushi. I love sushi! I'm curious, what are they telling you to do for a diet? Is it just well you are doing chemo?

Solange, I'm sorry that you are upset about your weight. My sister calls it "being fluffy." I think that's kind of cute. My understanding is that weight gain is very normal--still a bummer, but normal. As far as the bottle goes, dd is old enough that I've switched her to milk rather than formula. I use mostly cows milk, but often fill the bottle half full of either rice or soy milk. I was surprised, but she takes it cold, no problem.

On a bit of a sad note, I had one little bottle of milk stored in the freezer that I pumped before I had to stop nursing. After 2 months, I thought I could give it to her without causing too much confusion. When I thawed it, I discovered it had soured. I'm sad.

Round 4 done today--the last of the A/C. Next time, it's on to Taxol.

Also, Solange, I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels like life is better. I think that I just appreciate it more. I still get upset by silly things, but not nearly as often. My sis is going to get the book you suggested as a gift for my birthday. I'm looking forward to it.

Delphinus--what a cool/strange/fascinating story. Amazing.

I wish I could just grab you all up & give you great big hugs. I find great strength & support in you & I am truly grateful!
post #23 of 245
Originally Posted by Solange
myrrhmaid..I have to ask...does the mj help with the nausea?
Originally Posted by AuntieM
Myrrh, do you think the MJ helps?...I'm curious, what are they telling you to do for a diet?
The mj helps with everything! It puts a big smile on my face and I get distracted in some kind of silliness or task and we giggle and i'm grateful. mj makes me feel well enough that I have been surprised at my level of functioning. I've been kickin butt doing the laundry and housekeeping. I even hand weeded the front fence. It helps me distract myself from the stress and limitations and I can just trip on at what level I am able. I cleaned off the front porch and thanks to dh~the~garden~is~In!
The only thing they told me about diet was don't lose weight. I've lost about 5 pounds but that was some weaning weight that immediately dropped.
I have gone complete vegetarian. I read recomendations in linda page's book healthy healing and the prescription to nutritional healing by balch. They said meat protein feed tumors. It was rec. to have broiled fish 3 x a week after recovery.
I eat beans and rice and corn tortillas. Lots of shredded vegies-beets, carrots, jicama, cabbage. We love artichokes, me and dd sit and eat them together. Lots of raw nuts, almonds and sunflower seeds. Limited dairy. Fresh cheeses like cottage, mozzarella and farmers. Yogurt and kefir. I'm eating some tofu and eggs. Spinach, brussels, cauliflower, asparagus, zucchini. Lots of organic carrot juice and orange juice. We eat oats and homemade ww pastry flour waffles and pancakes with almond butter, bananas and blueberries. We get this bread called alvarado st. bakery sprouted wheat bread-it is sooo good-it makes the best french toast! We eat lots of salsa too-tomato and fruit ones.
Originally Posted by Solange
I am curious thou for those of us who have had to turn to bottles..now with the weather warming up do you still give your babies warm bottles or do you give them a little cooler?
I give her a cold bottle of organic cows milk. She loves it. If she eats cereal with me she drinks the rice milk. She thinks the bottle is ridiculous and drinks some them insists that I take the lid off so she can just use it as a glass. I are really having to be more on the ball with the variety of foods i give her. We seem to go on blueberry jags-where we'll eat a whole bag in one day! And popcorn. she loves the beans I make and she calls them poopoo beans. she also loooves brown rice. It's nice to have her sit on her own and eat. I can feel her new sense of independence. she's asked several times about nummynummynummynummys then she gets all bashful and smiles all sheepish and says all gone. I still wonder if there is any chance to relactate and continue or if i'm just having some level of denial here with the loss of bfing.
My white counts were low this last labs so dh was taught how to give me a neupagen this afternoon after he ran home from work to pick me up and drive me down there(my car broke down). I have to self inject for 10 days and do labs again at 1 week. I'm feeeling a bit uh like funny bone kind of funny....
my sis had to self inject-she said it was easy after the 1st time-she did it in her belly. so I guess if my little sis could do it i can do it also.
post #24 of 245
Thread Starter 
That is it .....I am moving to Cali....pass to you right please

how old are your babies?
You know my homeopath told me that she would prefer dd (9months) to be on organic raw cow's milk and I thought she was kidding. We have dd on organic soy forumla but it makes her cheeks sandpapery and homepath says it is from the soy. So she wanted me to switch to the milk so I thought she meant the organic dairy based formula version of the soy we use. DD could not tolerate it at all...so I switched back to the soy, and asked my homeopath again what she meant. She said raw organic cow's milk. Not homongized(sp?) or pasterized. I asked where do I get that and she said it is illegal...lol....but I found a place where I can get it, so if you guys are doing this too I guess I will get in touch with this farm. I just thought no cow's milk til after 1 year of age. I am worried though about the cost factor. Homeopath said we can use goats milk if we cannot afford the cow's.


.....sitting here feeling very fluffy ..

go to the doc today...feel like I have some congestion back in my lungs again....

post #25 of 245
So sorry about the death of Jaya.

I also had my last dose of AC yesterday. The tumor continues to shrink, but at a slower rate. On to Taxol and Xeloda next time. So, I am half way there, which is just The Taxol/Xeloda combo has some new, different and wacky side effects, but doesn't that just make life interesting.

I have also had the weirdest cravings, some for Wendy's, fries, etc. as some of you have mentioned. I also get weak sometimes and the only thing that makes me feel better is eating. I'm also craving big, expensive steaks, which is not something I'm normally that drawn to. I made dh take me to the Outback for the biggest, most expensive filet mignon on the menu! I think it's because I'm a bit anemic from the chemo.

I am jealous about the MJ. There's going to be a bill introduced in my state to make medical MJ legal. It just frosts my pumpkins that it isn't now. It makes sense only from the perspective of the pharma companies that can't make money off it. There are rumors that my republican governor, who has presidential asperations will veto it if it does pass. :

Strength and healing to all!
post #26 of 245
It's a crime that access to helpful and healing herbs are illegal. We still struggle in Ca with busts and it's supposedly legal here! We had a case where the cops were taking license plate #'s from folks who shopped at a place that sold grow lights. They were very embarassed when they busted a couple growing, gourd forbid,-violets!!!!
I'm having some pain this am from the shot yesterday. I have to go in for chemo today even though my counts are low. I guess I won't be getting another shot today even though there is an order for 10 pre-filled syringes. I wonder if i iced my belly if it would be more comfy to self inject?
Solange, my ds is 15 y.o. and I have a 23 mo. dd.
We actually use goat and cow's milk. We get the goats from a neighbor. I do bring it to 165 degrees in a double boiler before consuming or making kefir out of.
O.K. Smoke out at my house! Come one come all!:
post #27 of 245
Myrrh, are you doing the wbc booster that is given over several days? I'm taking the one that is administered every two weeks. One thing I've noticed is that if the nurse does & gentle stick & slowly pushes in the liquid it is MUCH more comfortable that when it is given quickly.

My dd is 16mo. On the milk topic, I've found that the best price around here for organic milk is at Trader Joes. The whole milk is pasteurized, but not homogenized.

EFmom, I wound up going to Wendy's for my fries too. They are perfect with a frosty. I've felt bad for them lately since it appears that the finger thing was a hoax. It's cost the business & more importantly the workers a lot of money. Sad.

DD is in need. She missed her nap today....

Big hugs!
post #28 of 245
AuntieM I'm doing the neupagen. To raise my white blood count. I'm at the stage where I am highly suceptible to illness-they called it somethign-i can't remember! I found out yesterday my insurance doesn't cover neulasta-which is only 1 shot ~vs~ 10!:
o.k. since we are confessing food indulgences-I ate a whole pint of ben & jerry's chunky monkey on the way to the clinic yesterday! I shared a couple chocolate chunks with dh-but that's it!
post #29 of 245
whew! I better catch up! well, day 1 of chemo-AC, so far a little anti-climactic, but I guess that's a good thing, although I've been really hungry, I guess from the steroid anti-nausea drug that they gave me as a preventative, and now I'm feeling all that food I ate is now heading for the wrong exit. man I really don't want to throw up but maybe that would make me feel better. I'm feeling a little wiped out too, I want to sleep but they said I might feel revved from the steroids.

myrrh and auntieM, like you guys I'll also be doing something for the white blood cell count, they sent me home with 10 neupogen shots to self-inject, on days 2-12, then it's back for round 2 of the AC in 2 weeks. is this chemothing going to get worse? you don't have to answer that, I think I can guess.

Traci, my baby is also 9 mths, we do heat the formula, or donated breastmilk slightly, just by plopping the filled bottle in a container of hot tap water for a couple of minutes, but he doens't mind it cold.

auntieM, I'm so sorry about the soured milk. I also had been saving my last little jar in the freezer, and decided to give it to him on mother's day. I was terrified that it might be sour. luckily it wasn't, so I went to the garden full of tulips and sat there at twilight while he drank it. I balled my eyes out, it was very emotional for me as I knew it was the last breasmilk of mine that he would ever have. But just so you don't feel too bad about missing out on a similar event, it didn't exactly go down the way I was imagining. I had these romantic notions that he would look up at me when the bottle touched his lips and burst with love and excitement and recognition of that long-lost taste. Alas, the little rascal was completely disinterested and I think a bit irritated by my inexplicable emotions, and crawled off to eat some dirt instead of finishing it. I guess things sometimes don't work out the way we think they will!

EFMom I so enjoy your poignant wit and humour, you have such a great way of putting things.

momof1sofar, we're all here for each other, through the good and the bad. I'm sending you lots of love.

Peace Jaya

Love to everyone,
post #30 of 245
Thank you, ladies, for your support and peaceful thoughts for Jaya. I think her death was particularly poignant because it came just days before the group marked the 1-year anniversary of another child's passing. Losing anyone is hard, but the young ones are hardest.

I'm following all of your updates with interest, and sending lots of healing vibes your way. I saw my onc today, and I don't have to go for another checkup for 6 months. And maybe no more MRI's unless something causes concern - thank goodness! I don't mind the chest x-rays but the MRI's get old quickly.

Going forward with hope...

Jaya, Allie, Jared, Brandon, and the others who were just too young to be taken...
post #31 of 245
Hi, All. I wish I had the mental space to put in a good post, but it's late & I should head to bed. I wanted you all to know that I am thinking of you & that you make a positive difference in my life.

post #32 of 245
Thread Starter 
Just checking in..
I am anxiously awaiting my last chemo this Friday...:LOL...can't wait for my chemo...now I know it has really effected my brain....
Doc says we will do a CT scan the following week and if he likes what he sees, then we follow up with a CT every 3 months. If he is not sure what he is looking at we will do a PET to make sure nothing lghts up.
I get my port out too after the CT scan.

post #33 of 245
Traci, here's to the last chemo!

I am really tired after the last round. I basically stayed in bed all weekend. My poor dh--everything falls on him and he is so good about it.

Can't wait for the end of the week, when I should start to feel human again. My scalp is starting to produce a little stubble, which I guess happens sometimes, even though you are still getting the same stuff that made your hair fall out in the first place. It will likely fall out again once I start the Taxol though.

My 80 year old father and step mother drove me to the doctor for my neulasta shot last week and we had an interesting conversation about the medical MJ. My dad, while a law and order type guy, is socially liberal and my step mother is very conservative. They both spend the winters in FL Bushland. I was amazed that both of them are medical MJ supporters. I guess they've seen enough people go through cancer and other illness, particularly in the retirement community where they live that they think it's insane to deny people something that might just help.
post #34 of 245
Yeah! Traci! Last chemo! Oh it will be so sweet to be there too!
I bought some pot leaf iron-ons to put on the butt of some shorts. And I got a patch that says Mary Jane that i'm going to put on a gas station shirt.
This 2nd round has hit me hard. I'm in some pain and exhaustion-hoping it will pass so I can make a cake for the big fishing derby dh puts on this weekend.
Thinking of you all kind, healing womyn.
post #35 of 245
Traci, that is great news!!! I am so pleased for you. You also give me hope.

I'm experiencing my most annoying chemo symptom right now. One of my eyes is watery & feels puffy. It interferes with seeing, which interferes with everything!

I feel like I don't want to complain because I don't want to focus on feeling bad & I don't want people to worry about me. On the other hand, I also feel like I need to talk about what I'm experiencing. KWIM?

Myyrrhmaid, I hope you feel better by this weekend.

EFmom, I understand what you are saying about relying on your DH. I feel like I am not much of a wife to my dh right now. He doesn't seem to mind, but I am sad that I need him to pick up so much slack for me right now.

momof1sofar, I'm glad that you are moving ahead. Had you been seeing your onc every 3 months? Those MRIs are yucky & annoying!

Delphinus, the milk thing wasn't as troubling as I thought it'd be. I'm just so glad that dd seems to be adjusting. Definitely feel a pang every now & then though.

Delphinus & Myrrhmaid, how are the shots going?

Take care all!
post #36 of 245
Delphinus & Myrrhmaid, how are the shots going?
they are getting easier-i think. i get nervous as all get out beforehand or anytime i think about it. i am getting desensitized by all the pokes though. it's just a little pinprick i keep telling myself. it's also the 'good' stuff to build me up. as long as it goes in slowly-the neupagen-then it's hardly noticeable.
my hair is buzz cut now-matches ds! we took pics. it's still rapidly coming out and my head hurts. i want it shaved now. i went to the local head shop and dh bought me some 1/2 sarongs that i turban on my head. i don't think i'll get a wig after all. i also got some of those biker bandana skull caps with smiley faces on one and flames on the other. i have some beaded fringe i put around the edges and they look real cute on.
thinking about you all and sending strength and love.
post #37 of 245
Just checkin' in on all you lurvly mamas!

Congratulations to Traci and good luck tomorrow with your last chemo! :
post #38 of 245
Thread Starter 
:LOL Celeste I love your siggy line!!! That is the best! TY!

Well here I sit you guys...in 3 hours I will be getting my last chemo...
I am nervous, anxious and feeling a bit reserved with my excitement, as I do not think I will really be jumping for joy until after my CT.

myrrhmaid..glad you feel at peace about your hair. I bought a wig and now have not even been wearing it all...just does not feel good for me. So I am wearing silks carves, batik bandanas, and sometimes my cute floppy sun hat from the Gap on top.
SO if anyone is interested in a wig, let me know and I can sell you mine at half the cost I bought it. It is a human hair wig. and my insurance did not cover it at all Maybe I should put it up at eBay?...hhmmm..

AuntieM how is your eye? You do need to be able to say "I don't feel good or this is bothering me" ectera....Yes, positive attitude is very important but we are not~ not human~ just because we have chemo illnesses...just do not let it black hole you into other thoughts..KWIM?

gtg little ones waking and I want to eat before I go for this treatment.

post #39 of 245
Thread Starter 
Oh and just to add, I bought a Mei Tai sling yesterday for DD and me as a kinda new beginning present for us. After all we have been through we deserve this little splurge.

I will be putting her back to breast in 2 weeks and resuming pumping.This is ok'd from Dr. Hale, Dr. Jack Newman(yes, I mean the real docs here...funny how cancer gets you intouch with amazing people), a professor in Texas as well as my oncologist and my OB. I started pumping last month but had to stop when I got sick and decided it would be better to just wait until after chemo is done(I actually started to get some colostrum from my left breast too). Even if I do not get my milk back, I am hoping she will take to breast to get the other benefits that breastfeeding brings for both of us.
post #40 of 245
Originally Posted by Solange
You do need to be able to say "I don't feel good or this is bothering me" ectera....Yes, positive attitude is very important but we are not~ not human~ just because we have chemo illnesses...just do not let it black hole you into other thoughts..KWIM?
Yes, I do KWYM. You put it very well.

I cannot even begin to tell you how thrilled I am for you. I am so excited that you will be able to continue breastfeeding. I really hope that it goes well for you.

The eye is still a little weird, but yesterday afternoon, it started feeling normal(ish) again & I feel safe to drive.

Celeste, nice to hear from you. Thank you again for starting this thread!

Thoughts of healing, comfort & love.
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