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Mamas Surviving Cancer... NEW THREAD -May - Page 5

post #81 of 245
Oooohhh, I am so jealous of you getting to meet IRL!!! A meeting of the Superheros is exactly right!

Traci, so sorry you are back to waiting!

I had my first round of Taxotere and Xeloda last week. It was a walk in the park. I felt fine afterward. I have to go two weeks in a row for the Taxotere, then I get a week off. The bummer part is that the tumor didn't shrink any from the 4th round of AC, so it's just as well we're movin' on.

My oncologist's office threw a picnic with food, music, games, etc. on Sunday for National Cancer Survivor's week. Dh and I took the kids. When I took my 7yo to the bathroom, she said to me, "Mom, most of these people have the same sickness you do, don't they?" I told her that most had had cancer at some time in the past, but a few were in treatment for it now. She said, "Mom, they look healthy, and lots of them are old. That's really good." Perfect lesson that I was hoping she'd take away!
post #82 of 245
Thread Starter 
myrrhmaid don't fret the port thing to much..if you can ..it is more bothersome in everyday life(for me anyway) as the locale on the chest ...it gets bumped by dd and my bra strap and the seat belt..kinda in the way...it is a life saver tho when it comes to all the chemos and other stuff

That is soo cool you two got to meet IRl...how cool.......I am in for any kind of mail exchange you all want to try if someone sets it up...

PET for me on the 16th results on the 20th...

EFmom sounds like you have a very smart dd there...children really are so much smarter than mainstream society thinks and so aware...

gtg dd making a b-line for the bathroom..she is obsessed with the pot for some reason...:LOL
post #83 of 245
Yup, it was sooooo cool to meet Myrrhmaid IRL. She is just as fabulous as you'd think she is from her posts & has a beautiful family. Have you ever seen a horse frolicking? Her dd played & danced around just like a little horse. Sooooo cute. Myrrh, I can totally see what your son is saying about the scene--just like that Star Wars bar. BTW, her son is a very handsome, well spoken young man who obviously loves his sister very much. What a pleasure to visit with you all! I am blown away by the goody bag you brought--such cool stuff. Your DH is a real sweetie too!

EFMom, what a nice realization for your daughter to come to. I bet it was very reassuring to her.

Traci, I'm glad you've got some firm dates.

It would definitely be fun to do a mail exchange or something.

#6 tomorrow.....

Great big hugs, thoughts of love, comfort & healing to you all!!!!
post #84 of 245
#6 went much more smoothly than #5. I didn't get a clot in my line, so there was much less pain at my infusion line.

I think of & pray for you all so often. I cannot believe how much praying I do now. It has been a great source of comfort me.

DD needs me, so got to go.

Mostly just wanted to say "hi," & bump us up the page.
post #85 of 245
Thread Starter 
I was thinking of you today.... sending you good chemo vibes...so I am glad to know it went well for you this time....I KWYM about prayer..the power of prayer really works and I have many prays that have been answered and that I can attest to since my whole journey with HD.

post #86 of 245
Thread Starter 
....just thought I would pop in and see how everyone is doing..it has been a while since any of us have posted here me being the last post and back already....

Having some major post chemo joint issues and air lung capacity going on...weird...but going to get it all checked out...

I have my PET this Thursday..

post #87 of 245
Solange, let us know how everything is going. We'll be thinking of you on Thursday. I haven't had a PET. Is it as noisy as an MRI, or more like a CT?

The last few days have been pretty darn uncomfortable. The Taxol really nailed me this time & my bones have been verrrry achey. I finally am starting to feel better. My nose is totally dripping off my face right now though. It seems to be that same watery eye that is the culprit. No real vision issues, so that's good.

I am starting to feel like the end is in sight.

How is everybody else doing?

Sending hugs, love & healing vibes to you all!
post #88 of 245
Solange, I'll be thinking of you on Thursday and sending good PET vibes your way!

AuntieM, doesn't that runny nose thing just get old! I keep mumbling under my breath, "Oh, my nose is running, what a surprise." My 4yo came up to me with a tissue the other day and said "Surprise, Mommy!" I've got the red/runny eye thing going on, too. I bought some Visine this morning which has helped a bit. I'm sorry the Taxol was hard on you.

I had kind of a hard weekend. I have to go for two Taxotere infusions during every three week cycle. The chemo makes me tired, but it's ten times harder on me because the weather has been unbearable--about 95 degrees and mega humid. For environmental reasons, we don't have air conditioning in our house or my car. (Note to self: When purchasing next car, get AC and to heck with the environment. : ) So, I sat on the couch under the ceiling fan all weekend like a slug!

Yesterday was our 24th anniversary. I had wanted to get dh a gift that was rather heavy. I stopped in the store on the way home, looked at the items and then realized I'd probably pass out if I tried to carry it out to the car in that heat! So dh had to take a rain check, poor guy. This cancer has just crystallized for me how very much I love this man. He has been incredible.
post #89 of 245
Hi Superwymyn! We are all going thru it..s. I wonder if the homeopathic remedy allium. I know it works on colds with clear, profuse draining. Might be worth a try. i'm just rounding a bout of the neupagen/chemo blues! Only to be going to the twightlight cocktail hr. of port installation(tomorrow).
This last chemominfusion was put in very quickly and burned and I was hit with nausea/side affects before I was even out of the chair-aargh..
i did get a nice block of sleep today. i'm 1/2 way thru treatment now. i wonder how i'll do/make it thru the next 1/2. and yes thank goddess for dh!!!!!!!!!!!! i hear that efmom! we just had #10 anniversary and solid!
does anyone not have the 'close to the bone' book. life-threatening illness and the search for meaning, by jean shinoda bolen? PM ME!!
i wish i had the energy to write more but i was just able to show up today. we had dd's 2nd bday on sun. dh installed an old clawfoot tub and i've been loving the relaxation of a bath-at last! went in for blood test today and dh was saying(while i was in the lab)that i'm going to relactate after and being such a support in a full waiting room! i'm so proud!
take care! You are all in my heart, thoughts, prayers and mind. Thanks for sharing your strengths and weaknesses.
post #90 of 245
Thread Starter 
AuntieM from what I read the PET is just like the CT but a bigger doughnut hole to go through and it takes longer b/c they inject you with a glucose that takes an hour to travel through your body before they can do the scan.

(aww..I just looked to me right on the screen and see the new fam bed smilies..gotta get one of those..lol..)

EFmom ....I bow to you for being w/o the AC..that has to be tough..

myrrhmaid...IKWYM about close to the bone..everyone needs a copy!!!
How did your port hook up go ??? You are doing a great job and your chemo time is going so fast! How many cycles again do you have to do?

I saw a girl yesterday prob about 12ish with a beautiful bald tan head dressed so pretty and had the biggest smile on her face. I wanted to walk up to her and tear my headscarf off and say you give me the power to do it too....blasted *c*...

My hair is actually starting to come back in..very dark tho...

nervous about tomorrow....will be more so on Moday when I get the results...just trying to keep myself busy until then....

hope you all are doing well...
any more thoughts on snail mail between us for support?

post #91 of 245
the port was my own personal nightmare. It took 3 hrs. and i was aware the whole time. they kept putting it in, adjusting it, taking it out-i think everyone in the joint got a chance to insert it!! GRRR.. and they put it right in the upper part of my boob! I'm not crazy about the placement.
i got bad news today-i'm not 1/2 way thru like i thought! i have to go until december, not aug. so i am devastated and crying over that wondering how my mind did that or?? i don't know how i'm going to make it til dec. dh already did all his paperwork for work so now he's mad and i'm helpless and sick. the dr. gave me one of those morphine patches today. does anyone use one? i'm sick and weak and sad. even though i have you gals i feel so lost and alone. how could i have screwed up the timeline on these treatments so badly? i don't even know if i'll have a brain when i'm done. i'm beat today. i'm sorry for my pity party. it's all hitting me hard and i'm weak right now.
as far as writing goes-if you have someone you particularly click with- pm them and ask if they are into the lost art of letter writing. I make sure and ask that 1st becuz it is very humiliating to pour your heart out on paper and get no reply at all.
post #92 of 245
Thread Starter 
myrrhmaid..... pm'ed you
post #93 of 245
Oh myrrh, How disappointing. I wish I were there for a real hug. You will chip away at this one day at a time and eventually it will be done.

I know what you mean about this going for so long. My doc started talking about radiation after the surgery, and I've been looking into what that entails and it is a long time. I'll also be on Herceptin for probably a year after chemo, which is weekly infusions at the oncologist's office. If I get a mastectomy or two, I'll also want reconstruction. So, on the one hand, I'm cheering myself on because I'm over half way done with chemo, but yet there's so much more beyond that. I just want my life back!

A colleague told me yesterday that she has a suspicious lump in her breast that the radiologist told her looks like cancer. She's waiting the biopsy results. This disease is like a plague.
post #94 of 245
Hi everyone! I'm so sorry I haven't been in touch, I just want to give all of you a big huge hug. I got a really high fever last night and was determined not to go to the emergency room (friday night--would be way too crowded!), so I've just been staying in bed, it seems to be working, I feel better but tired. I think it's just a bug from one of the kiddies, I'm taking neupogen so I don't think it's as big a medical emergency, I think my white cell counts are o.k.?

I am thinking of you all so much. I got the most beautiful card from myrrhmaid yesterday! With gorgeous photos, myrrhmaid you are so beautiful, as is your dh and ds and your adorable dd!

Sounds like we're all having a bit of a rough patch. (I guess that's an understatement, maybe they'll bend the profanity rules for our thread and we could introduce swearing into our posts! sometimes you just have to say F*&%k, this sucks!!!!) I love all of you and get so much strength, thank you for being there! I'll write more later...

love janet
post #95 of 245
Well i'm about to go off to bed thought I'd just say goodnight and sweet dreams everyone. I'm trying to stay positive, but I have to admit I have been feeling a bit depressed, not sure if it's chemo-induced menopause? I also had a huge disappointment recently.

We had been excitedly awaiting our ds Maxwell's end of year playschool family day assembly where he had planned to sing a special solo song in addition to the group song. His teachers said he had asked specifically to sing a special song for his mom and had been practicing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star for weeks. But on the special day he woke up with high fever, which turned out to be roseola! I don't think he was too phased by missing the event but I was absolutely devastated, I cried for days, I'm still not really over it. Crazy, huh? I don't know, I guess I just feel like I want to soak up every single minute with my kids, I'm so terrified of missing anything, my heart is just bursting with love for them.

Although, we were lucky enough to eavesdrop at the gym door for a moment the day before when the kids were practicing. They were all going up on stage one by one saying why they loved their parents. The kids before Maxwell went up and said things like "I love my mom and dad because they take me to the park". When it was Maxwell's turn he went up and said "I love my family because they let me watch Castle in the Sky" (A japanese-animation film by Miyazake (Spirited Away director) that's not exactly age appropriate for a 3-going-on-4-year-old!) OOPSY!! Oh well, at least he's honest!

Anyway, let's all try to stay positive, relish every moment, and remember that we are ALL beating this crazy thing we've got. We're all going to be around for a very long time!!

love and kisses, janet
post #96 of 245
Thread Starter 
here, here Janet..

I know I am sooooo anxiuos about tomorrow to get my PET results...It is making me and dh both crazy.....I hope I can sleep tonight...*sigh*
post #97 of 245
Traci!!! I am sending you all my love and healing energy, PLEASE don't worry, YOU ARE BEATING THIS THING!!!! I love you!!!! xoxoxjanet
post #98 of 245
Sorry I've been away for a while. I'm actually in the good couple of days before chemo. I've been enjoying my sister & her family who were visiting from out of state. What a treat!

Awww, y'all, this does just suck so much. There are definitely some positive things that have come out of it so far for me, but I certainly wish there was an easier way to learn those lessons.

Myrrh, hope your mood has turned more positive.

Janet, did you get on top of that fever thing? All my materials say to call the doc if I spike a fever. So sad that you missed the big performance. Have you heard ds sing the song?

Traci, really sending out the positive vibes to you.

Round 7 Wednesday....

post #99 of 245
Thread Starter 
Well, I am not done...
PET shows spots everywhere I had tumors. Main concern is under my left arm b/c it is at a level 9. I guess if any of the spots are at a level 2.2 they do not require further treatment(?), but due to this node being on the "higher side" I have to continue chemo.
So my neck chest and groin are still afflicted. Not growing any bigger, smaller by far yes, just not gone like they need to be.
Feelings are reeling...feel kinda numb....
I have breathing tests and heart tests scheduled all this week to determine what kind of chemo we will do. I may get more ABVD or I may get the Standford T, which is 6 weeks of chemo straight~ every week for 6 weeks. Will know Friday....
check back when I can
post #100 of 245
Traci, I'm so glad things are shrinking & so sad that the tumors are not completely gone. I am sending thoughts, hopes & prayers of peace, strength and comfort your way.
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