Post-Weaning Support

[lexbeach]

I've just recently (like, as in TODAY) completed the weaning process with my 27-month-old twins. It has been a long, hard journey. I am feeling much more out of sorts than I imagined I would be. It's like I have to figure out who am I as a mother all over again. Our weaning happened less gradually than I had planned, and just a couple of weeks ago my boys were still nursing pretty frequently.

I am hoping to connect with other mamas who have completed their breatfeeding relationships with their children. It is just so weird to not be a nursing mother anymore. It just sort of felt like I'd ALWAYS be one. I still feel so passionately about it, and don't want to stop going to LLL or things like that. I still feel the impulse to lift my shirt and offer a boob (mostly when I'm on the phone or the computer and want a moment of silence). How long does that last? I guess I can imagine it lasting forever to some degree.

I am also still getting used to comforting my toddlers without using my breasts. In many ways that part has been really nice. I feel like we do a lot more hugging and other ways of loving each other. I am getting to know my toddlers as new little non-nursing guys.

Anyway, I'd love for you to share your post-weaning adjustment experiences with me.

Lex

[matts_mamamama]

{completely OT, because I have no advice and can only offer hugs, but when I saw the thread title, I thought immediately that you needed help weaning yourself from posting on MDC too much LOL}

[Embee]

Lex,

Timely. My DS recently weaned at age 4 and 3 months. (Of course, they say that with CLW, I shouldn't count him as weaned until he hasn't asked for a year ). At any rate, it's been weeks since he's asked to nurse, and the last several times he did actually nurse, it was but for a second or two before he stopped, looked up at me, and shrugged.

Anyway, I've been surprised being that ours was such a gradual self-weaning, how truly affected I've been. I remember a time a year ago when things were stressful and I was starting to look forward to a time when he would wean. And now that he has... I feel a little lost. Even though his nursing became more and more infrequent over the last year, I do feel to a large extent that we're both trying very hard to redefine our relationship. We've been comforting in many different ways from day one, but the loss of nursing does indeed change things profoundly. A little time, some focus will surely help.

As for me, I feel sad not being a nursing mama anymore also. I didn't realize how much a part of ME it was. It's a loss for sure. Heck, they finally gave CLW it's own forum here on MDC and DS weans? Stinker... I was all ready to get all sorts of advice and support about how to cope when he's nursing at 5, 6, and 7!

Thanks for starting this thread. I've been feeling the need for a little support in this area myself.

The best,
Em

[mumm]

I, too, recently weaned my 2 year old. And once I started the process it happened much, much, much faster than I thought it would. We started earlier this week, and I planned to be done by mid-June!

We are struggling with sleep issues, because nursing was so closely related with napping. She has fallen asleep for nap the past 3 days after pretty lpng crying sessions, during which I can't touch or look at her, but I need to be near by. Today she cried for close to 15 minutes, which is so long when you can't offer comfort. Falling asleep at night has not been an issue for some reason, we just snuggle in and fall asleep. When we talk she'll agree that she is sad, but can't put it in to words when asked why, even if I mention nursing.

And there are all those times during the day when we could have solved a problem or situation by just slowing down with a few mintues of nursing. Food prep has also been problematic for me because she is eating so much more. With all these issues I feel like a poster child for extended nursing, keep going with it if you can!

This is also the first time in 5 1/2 years that I haven't been nursing or pregnant, so I should feel so good that my body is mine. But, yeech, what a body it has become!

We weaned because I am about to begin injectible fertility treatments and didn't want the nursing to jepordize the outcome of that. I think that weaning can be done in so many ways, and I'm not real thrilled with how this happened. In the long run I know it will not even be on our radar of "mistakes" but right now I am feeling sad for her, for me and for my engorged breasts, who have done a great job for the past 5 years. Breasts that nurse two for 27 months get more kudos in my book.

Mumm

[mumm]

So I killed your thread, and ended up nursing a zillion times yesterday. Sor ry.

[Linda KS]

My kids have been weaned for years now, but I just wanted to throw in that your hormones get really, really thrown off when you wean, or when your child is inconsistant about how much they nurse. If you are feeling a little funky/blue/etc., it might not just how you feel about this change, but also your body readjusting.

I tandum nursed and by the time my youngest weaned I felt like I have been nursing forever. I just remember feeling happy about being able to wear clothes that I couldn't nurse in! And suddenly I could have a glass (or 2) of wine! I could take medicine!

I loved having my body back.