I just visited the in-laws (never a good tme to think about stuff) and I'm feeling so persecuted about my kid.
I think it's a combination of my husband's bad mood of late which is making him short tempered and his mother's lack of understanding and respect for normal kid behavior.
Or is it really that my child is so unusual?
The deal is this- my child is very, very sensitive- emotionally as well as physically. I like to treat her preferences with respect and try (within reason) to accommodate her tastes. I can't always make her world comfortable or perfect, but I don't get angry at her when she gets unhappy or upset. I don't see her getting angry as "bad behavior" or treat her tastes or feelings as unreasonable.
So- mealtime is really not fun with in-laws and g-parents. Dd is picky, picky, picky. It's not simply that she does not like ANY fruits and only eats a few vegetables. It's that she likes ice cream, but only chocolate, muchrooms, but only out of soup, olives, but only off pizza, popsicles, but only green and orange, bread, but not crusts, rice, but with soy sauce NOT butter, etc...
For a two year old, I don't think it's all that unusual that she only has maybe 20-30 foods she eats. The issue is that she won't eat the foods if they are mixed, or have sauce, etc.
It's not a nutrition issue- I think her diet is pretty OK. But her pickiness pisses people off. It's that simple. Grandparents act like it's a moral or nutritional or discipline issue. I feel like it's none of the above- it's just that two year olds are picky!!!! and it's anoying! Adults don't want to admit to this, so they make it all about the kid.
Sidenote- my husband is 33 years old and doesn't like the food on his plate to touch. He will only use 1 kind of razor and 1 kind of soap. There's a litany of food he won't eat and he regularly refuses fish he says tastes "fishy." His mother won't eat any vegetables that are not cooked to a mushy pulp, or any food with any kind of spiciness, or any fish i cook because it is not boiled untill rubbery. Oh yeah, she won't drink soy milk, or non-watery coffee. The two of them are very picky IMO. It's funny to me that dd's pickiness annoys them so much while my fil and I who are less picky BY FAR don't get worked up over it.
My other concern is pickiness/sensitivity in other areas. Dd hates getting the slightest bit wet, especially her shoes. She cries if you touch her with a hand that is wet (actually, my dh gets upset if you touch him while wet too- so maybe that's not so big.) She hates the feel of grass on her feet and often asks to be carried over grass. She wants the tags cut out of all clothes. She's beyond scared of the dark- she's almost scared of the shade. Oh, and won't use any toothpaste with any minty flavor.
Oh yeah- everything has to match. Well- preferably everything should match.
Sometimes I wonder if this is SID type stuff. She is very very coordinated physically, though she tends to avoid trying stuff she doesn't know if she can do right. She doesn't have any of the delay-type stuff that SID is associated with. She's been drinking from a normal cup for a while. Her fine motor skills are fantastic. Her functioning in most areas is advanced fr her age.
Also- she's not always quite that sensitive. Lately she seems to be in a bit of a phase of it. We just came out of a good 6 months with less sensitivity.
The thing is- the flip side of her sensitivity is that she is so kind and sensitive to others, especially if a person is scared or hurt of crying. She always tries to get band-aids for people who hurt themselves. She always asks what's wrong if someone cries or seems sad. She's so sweet and sensitive to others. It seriously melts my heart.
So here's my question- is there a real problem here? Does my dd sound like a normal 2-3 year old?
I hate the insinuation that I somehow have cuased her to be the way she is. I also hate the insinuation that I coddle her, ESPECIALLY when the insinuation is being made by people who have INSANELY SPECIFIC TASTES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!! Tastes, I may add, that I have to put up with all the time!
So should I look more into the SIDS thing? Or is there anything I can do to decrease sensitivity? Or should I just assume that dh and the grandparents simply don't know as much as I do (this is true, either way- my dh is not very informed about kids, doesn't go to playgroups, doesn't read book, etc.)
Thats for the input!
I think it's a combination of my husband's bad mood of late which is making him short tempered and his mother's lack of understanding and respect for normal kid behavior.
Or is it really that my child is so unusual?
The deal is this- my child is very, very sensitive- emotionally as well as physically. I like to treat her preferences with respect and try (within reason) to accommodate her tastes. I can't always make her world comfortable or perfect, but I don't get angry at her when she gets unhappy or upset. I don't see her getting angry as "bad behavior" or treat her tastes or feelings as unreasonable.
So- mealtime is really not fun with in-laws and g-parents. Dd is picky, picky, picky. It's not simply that she does not like ANY fruits and only eats a few vegetables. It's that she likes ice cream, but only chocolate, muchrooms, but only out of soup, olives, but only off pizza, popsicles, but only green and orange, bread, but not crusts, rice, but with soy sauce NOT butter, etc...
For a two year old, I don't think it's all that unusual that she only has maybe 20-30 foods she eats. The issue is that she won't eat the foods if they are mixed, or have sauce, etc.
It's not a nutrition issue- I think her diet is pretty OK. But her pickiness pisses people off. It's that simple. Grandparents act like it's a moral or nutritional or discipline issue. I feel like it's none of the above- it's just that two year olds are picky!!!! and it's anoying! Adults don't want to admit to this, so they make it all about the kid.
Sidenote- my husband is 33 years old and doesn't like the food on his plate to touch. He will only use 1 kind of razor and 1 kind of soap. There's a litany of food he won't eat and he regularly refuses fish he says tastes "fishy." His mother won't eat any vegetables that are not cooked to a mushy pulp, or any food with any kind of spiciness, or any fish i cook because it is not boiled untill rubbery. Oh yeah, she won't drink soy milk, or non-watery coffee. The two of them are very picky IMO. It's funny to me that dd's pickiness annoys them so much while my fil and I who are less picky BY FAR don't get worked up over it.
My other concern is pickiness/sensitivity in other areas. Dd hates getting the slightest bit wet, especially her shoes. She cries if you touch her with a hand that is wet (actually, my dh gets upset if you touch him while wet too- so maybe that's not so big.) She hates the feel of grass on her feet and often asks to be carried over grass. She wants the tags cut out of all clothes. She's beyond scared of the dark- she's almost scared of the shade. Oh, and won't use any toothpaste with any minty flavor.
Oh yeah- everything has to match. Well- preferably everything should match.
Sometimes I wonder if this is SID type stuff. She is very very coordinated physically, though she tends to avoid trying stuff she doesn't know if she can do right. She doesn't have any of the delay-type stuff that SID is associated with. She's been drinking from a normal cup for a while. Her fine motor skills are fantastic. Her functioning in most areas is advanced fr her age.
Also- she's not always quite that sensitive. Lately she seems to be in a bit of a phase of it. We just came out of a good 6 months with less sensitivity.
The thing is- the flip side of her sensitivity is that she is so kind and sensitive to others, especially if a person is scared or hurt of crying. She always tries to get band-aids for people who hurt themselves. She always asks what's wrong if someone cries or seems sad. She's so sweet and sensitive to others. It seriously melts my heart.
So here's my question- is there a real problem here? Does my dd sound like a normal 2-3 year old?
I hate the insinuation that I somehow have cuased her to be the way she is. I also hate the insinuation that I coddle her, ESPECIALLY when the insinuation is being made by people who have INSANELY SPECIFIC TASTES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!! Tastes, I may add, that I have to put up with all the time!
So should I look more into the SIDS thing? Or is there anything I can do to decrease sensitivity? Or should I just assume that dh and the grandparents simply don't know as much as I do (this is true, either way- my dh is not very informed about kids, doesn't go to playgroups, doesn't read book, etc.)
Thats for the input!
) and said "If my father was here, he'd say........." The cute thing was, FIL said, "Your father is here." 
Seems she did a great job to me 
