the issue of infant carseats in our country - Page 2

[oceanbaby]

I have not and would not take my child out while someone drives. My reason is this. If there was an accident and my child was seriously injured, maimed, or killed I could never *ever* forgive myself. I know I could not live with the guilt I would have.

That's why I never take them out of the carseat.

I know where the OP is coming from. I haven't had an accident since ds1 was born (and only once in the 10 years I had been driving before then), so theoretically I could not have used a carseat this entire time and he would have been just fine. But I just can't take him out, for the reason I quoted above.

I have spent many hours nursing a baby pulled over on the side of a road or a freeway exit.

I don't think someone is a horrible parent for taking their child out of the carseat. I just think they are much less risk averse than I am!

[Wabi Sabi]

Originally Posted by Shonahsmom

If babe is really hungry and needs to nurse, why not just pull over?

That is usually what we do...my DH is a stickler for seat belt safety and generally speaking would have a fit if I unbuckled while on the highway.

That being said, I have unbuckled *myself* so that I could nurse the baby. We were stuck in a nasty traffic jam while visiting family in Chicago. Pulling over just wasn't really possible in this case, the baby had been crying for a while already, and it looked like we were going to be stuck for quite a while longer.

[Dreaming]

The one time I have had to lean over DD to feed her (or else let her scream) was in a gridlock traffic jam last summer. It took us 20 minutes to get to the next exit.

[IdentityCrisisMama]

I think there is room for a little flexibility with car seats. There is a difference between taking a taxi for 10 blocks in downtown Manhattan and driving on a highway for miles.

And, yea, I think there may be a cultural thing going on as well. It seems that, in cultures that aren’t so dependent on private cars, car seats are less of a focus. Makes sense.

[amma!]

hey i nurse my baby without ever removing her from her carseat. i just loosen my seat belt a bit (at first i woudl just remove it altogether, but later learned how to keep it on) and sit up on my knees and lean over and pop in the breast.
of course now that she is in a frotn facing carseat this is not possible, but she is old enough to eat other food or wait till we can stop, so that is okay.

oh and about other countries, e.g india ... we travel more in buses and trains anyway, because that is much *faster* than cars. i was also upset by lack of carseats in india but then realised that road traffic is so slow compared to that in the US. anyway, i did my best to avoid cars.

[gossamer]

Well babies don't sit in car seats in limos or in taxis or on buses either. I think the carseat thing is yes a safety precaution and yes it does save lives but we don't all wreck everyday.

No, we don't all wreck every day but we never know when we are going to wreck. That's why it's an accident and not an on purpose. :LOL And yes, our parents probably didn't use car seats but also back then most cars were about the same size. Or at least when I was growing up. There wasn't the liklihood of a little mini cooper type car getting into an accident with an Excursion or Hummer. To me, it just isn't worth my child's life.
Gossamer

[cortsmommy]

Originally Posted by dallaschildren

Kids should be in car seats even in limos and taxis.

Ideally yes but you don't see New Yorkers lugging car seats around the city. I was just pointing out that not everyone uses car seats even in this country.

Now personally I pulled over to nurse my son and never took him out of the carseat while driving. However I have a family member who thought it would be great to take my son on a tractor ride, and my son's dad once pulled Cort out of his carseat and let him sit on his lap once we hit our neighborhood. I raised some hell that day and of course I was "overreacting." However I did not want Cort do be thinking he could ride outside his seat.

[Trishy]

Riding unrestrained is the single greatest risk factor for death and injury among child motor vehicle occupants. Among children ages 14 and under killed in motor vehicle crashes as occupants in 2002, 50 percent were not using safety restraints at the time of the collision.

http://www.safekids.org/tier2_rl.cfm?folder_id=3120

I cannot bear to hear my baby cry but I would much rather he cry for five minutes so I can pull over in a safe place than be dead forever. You do not know when you will be in an accident. There are far too many sad stories like shannon0218 posted on the news. Horrible accidents that could have been easily prevented where an innocent child is dead. Those children did not know that being properly restrained would have saved thier lives and did not have the voice to tell their parents that they wanted to be safely restrained.

[BabyBumblebee]

No judgement here....

just my own experience;

We always pull over to nurse....always. It's a risk that I don't feel comfortable taking, probably 'cos I have been in 3 car accidents (all as a passenger). My psychiatrist used to be a car seat engineer, and he did all of the testing on unrestrained dummies - the stories he told me were enough to convince me that no matter how upset Charlie was it wasn't a good idea

[blessedwithboys]

it is an issue of "live and learn" for some ppl.

i was raised with the attitude of "well, i did it with my babies, and it didnt kill them...". this, from my mother.

when ds1 was born, i was very young. i always took him out of his seat. he was HN, now i know he has sensory issues that made it most likely almost painful to be on his back. all i knew then was that his crying was going to be the cause of an accident. the worst i ever did was to leave him in the sling and just get in and drive 30 mins home one night b/c i knew if i took him out and put him in his seat he would go nuts.

flash forward to ds2...same HN's, same sensory issues, but this time i knew better. this baby did alot of crying in the car. i never took him out once.

i was hit by the first wave of the back to sleep campaign. i wish they would do a carseat campaign. it would make a huge difference i think.

[Lynski]

I never ever take DS out of the car seat for 2 reasons. The first being that it only takes 1 second for an accident to occur. You can drive as carefully as you like but you can't count on everyone else to do the same. A 6 week old baby just died here last month because of not being in the car seat. I don't know why exactly the baby wasn't in the car seat but I'm sure the mom thought it would be fine when she decided not to strap him in. The mother was just fine.

The second reason is it's the law. Not having them in the car seat is not only a crime, but is considered child abuse. You have to take classes for child abuse with other people who really DO abuse their children, and they investigate you for other instances. Your whole life gets turned upside down! There's no way I'd risk it just for the convenience of nursing while we drive. And DS was a HN baby too and there were times it took forever to get where we were going because we had to pull over more than once. It seems like a small sacrifice.

[zeldabee]

Originally Posted by cortsmommy

Ideally yes but you don't see New Yorkers lugging car seats around the city. I was just pointing out that not everyone uses car seats even in this country.

Yeah, you really can't carry a car seat around in the city. I did ride in a taxi with my son on a few occasions, but usually was able to avoid it.

People who live outside NYC (very few other places in the country) don't understand what it's like in a place where few people have cars and everyone uses mass transit. My son's infant car seat was probably used a total of 3 times before he outgrew it. People wear out the wheels on their strollers, as I did once Sprogly was too big for his Ergo, and their car seats live in the closet.

ETA: We moved out of NYC, live in the burbs now, and I don't drive yet...but I regularly turn down offers of a ride when there's no car seat available.

[Ruthla]

I think that NYC taxis and limos should keep carseats in the trunk, since it's impractical for most NYers to carry a carseat around the City.

[shannon0218]

An excellent idea Ruth, many police officers and ambulances carry car seats with them. After all, one only has to watch Third Watch to see there are accidents in downtown New York too

(see, as a canuck, I just assume those shows are totally accurate )

[calpurnia]

Originally Posted by IdentityCrisisMama

And, yea, I think there may be a cultural thing going on as well. It seems that, in cultures that aren’t so dependent on private cars, car seats are less of a focus. Makes sense.

Totally.

(not to say that I don't think child car safety is important, just that it seems to be stressed a lot more in north America, & the main social difference I can think of in this context is the car usage)

[captain optimism]

Originally Posted by loving-my-babies

My question is.. where does this come from? Was there some kind of a campaign in the US to encourage the use of carseats, that it made it so deep in the minds of people that "carseat=good parent, no carseat=bad parent"?

Yes, there was a campaign to promote the use of carseats, in the US and in several other countries. In the late 1970s, several states passed laws that children below a certain age had to ride in safety seats.

I found a short and not very technical essay on that here:

http://www.pregnancy-place.com/The_H...ves_Lives.html

I found a lot of articles saying that use of car seats has reduced infant morbidity and mortality rates, but I can't find the original study that the statistic came from. In 2002, this article asserted that at least 51% of children under 5 were riding in cars unrestrained. Here's that article:

http://www.aafp.org/afp/20020515/2085.html

I would like to see more information on this, but my impression is that in places where car seats are used, children survive car accidents at a better rate. Since car accidents happen by accident, and are not predictable, it seems better to me to use a carseat.

(When we take car trips we stop to nurse.)

[RosieTook]

As for the "we didn't ride in car seats and we are fine " attitude (not that there's much of that here...) I don't buy that when it comes to feeding solids at 6 weeks, or using formula, so why would I for car seats!! When you konw better you do better, plain and simple!

I am considered "anal" Yes, you read that right around some of my family for my insistence on carseats. I guilt tripped my cousin into buying a bigger carseat for her 14 month old last time I visited then, he was STILL in his infant seat. I said several times that it is time for a new one and she would say "oh he's not that heavy yet" and it took me several tries to explain to her that there is a height limit too...his head was topping to the top of the seat!!

It took me getting almost angry at her as I told her that I get a sick feeling in my stomach whenever I think of him like that for her to realize that this was not a good idea. We never fight, but we did about this cause I wouldn't give up on it...guess what, later that day she went out and bought her ds a convertable seat and not only that, but at my insistence it is still rear facing!

Car safety is not to be messed with. I will admit that I have nursed dd in the seat, but I am lucky enough to have breasts that are big enough to reach with us both restrained...still, I prefer to pull over if at all possible.

[Throkmorton]

Originally Posted by Ruthla

I think that NYC taxis and limos should keep carseats in the trunk, since it's impractical for most NYers to carry a carseat around the City.

In my smallish Canadian town, one taxi outfit has Alpha Omegas in the trunk of some of their cabs, and they taught their drivers to install them and adjust them to fit children. Even if I am on my own, I call that co. because I think that is cool. Yes, occasionally you have to wait longer for a cab with a child seat, but it is worth it.

No, i never took DS out of the car seat.

[PatchyMama]

funny this comes up here...... I am on a local AP list and was completely shocked when numerous moms confessed to not strapping their babies into carseats when they were crying because it was so "un-AP" and cruel. I felt like I should have posted something, but I just didnt know what to say as I never never expected it to come from that group of moms. They were letting their babies crawl around on the floor in the back .....I honestly can not even wrap my head around the logic. I do my best to be as AP as I can but sometimes you have to put their safety first right? I honestly had never even thought that people thought of car seats as cruel until recently.

[Aura_Kitten]

i am always astounded at the attitude that some parents have. of COURSE many parents aren't badgered into putting their kids in carseats in countries where cars are not that prevalent. DUH?

i have yet to meet a person who was like, "oh, today i'm going to get up, go to take my kids to school and get in a wreck on the way there and we might die so let's not wear a seat belt!" we don't KNOW ** WHEN ** an accident is going to happen. so why even take the chance?

people get into car wrecks every SECOND. obviously not US right now, because anyone reading this right now is on a computer and probably not behind the wheel of a car ~ but we *might* be... tomorrow... the day after... maybe this evening, when we're taking our kids out for (organic) pizza. we just don't know. and if we could do something to save our children's lives ~ why not take that precaution?

a crying baby...

or a dead baby?

i'd prefer my child to have a few minutes of grief... then to lose my baby forever.