Is either WOH *or* SAH part of NFL? - Page 11

[the_lissa]

I disagree. I saw a lot of WOH bashing. If there was sah bashing, I missed it.

[musingmama]

hmmm yeah I missed the SAHM bashing on the daycare thread as well....
I am very curious as to why an OP criticizing the whole concept and reality of daycare would get through the moderators, and I felt the same way about the thread that generalized that SAHMs are thinner and "yummy mommies" :Puke and WOHMs are "ummm bigger... even though they have highlights in thier hair and can afford nicer clothes..." and in both instances the OP was asking if others shared that same self righteous view so they could all revel in the giddiness of judgeing others...., so it seemed a very obvious set up to bash WOHMs and feel superior. Its almost as if it is desired by the powers that be that the SAHM forum have train wreck after train wreck to shut it down, and it seems like it is happening pretty easy...
sad because I had a different view of the potential for a SAHP forum that could support all parents and view all the work that one does caring for children as real work, not as being lazy and "supported by babydaddies".... theres a lot more to support than just money.... and why is caring for children seen as a real job only if its someone else's kids....
oh well, this just always goes around in circles anyway
I just wish we could talk openly and respectful and realize we just don't know what its like to be in anothers shoes....

[RedWine]

I have to disagree about the daycare thread. Yes, it became a train wreck, and that's a shame. But it NEEDN'T have become a train wreck. The thread, as I understood it, was NOT about trashing WOH moms. It was specifically about daycare -- NOT about child care other than mama. There are plenty of WOH moms who use nannies, au pairs, relatives, flex-time shifts so daddy stays home sometimes, etc.

That thread could have been useful and the original subject itself should not have been offensive to WOH mamas. Again, it COULD have been about daycare, period. NOT about other-than-mama care (of which, as I've mentioned, there exist many other options besides daycare). It became a battle, which is sad, because it really didn't have to go there. But discussing daycare in and of itself should not be tabboo.

[RedWine]

Oh, and the "do you have time to excerise" thread didn't have to go that route either. The original post was about not having time to exercise, or something like that. I can relate, as I am definitely NOT a "yummier mommy" since I became a SAHM. Quite the opposite, for some of the reasons mentioned in that thread.

Perhaps instead of deleting an entire thread, maybe the mods could delete offesive individual posts?

[Cynthia Mosher]

The thread has not been deleted. It was removed for review and may be returned but probably to another forum for general discussion.

[RedWine]

Thanks, CM -- but again, maybe no need for removal of the thread...? Can you just delete the offensive posts, or -- as what happens in other forums -- interject warnings from the mods, but leave the thread?

[Cynthia Mosher]

There are some posts that perhaps should be edited or removed. But my feeling is, and was from the start, that the topic is one that should be discussed generally. The quality of daycare is not really a SAHM specific topic. Actually it is a topic that should be of interest to the entire Mothering community and not one that is limited to or should be discussed as a SAHM issue. So I think the thread should be moved to another forum and perhaps the OP edited to present it as a general discussion for all parents. Though the OP presented it as a SAHM question the discussion turned completely to a critique (negative and positive) of the studies mentioned. I don't think that was the intent of the OP. If it was then she needs to start another thread for that purpose outside the SAHM forum or we need to accept it s such and move the thread.

If the intent was to ascertain if the implications of these studies influenced a SAHM's decision to stay home rather than work then that is a completely different topic than the thread took and needs to be edited accordingly and the thread redirected.

So the review is to decide which of the two will happen.

[RedWine]

Ahhhh. I get it now. Thanks.

If I may say so, you are an extremely wise woman.

[radish]

Thanks for the posts RedWine and CM.