Honestly, being a PT WOHM feels like the very best choice for me. While I needed to concentrate on mothering 24/7 in the first months to get the hang of it and form a good bond w/my son, by the end of my maternity leave I often was finding it hard to be w/him all day. I feel that my working hours "recharge" me for mothering rather than tiring me. I know the experience is just the opposite for other people and would not presume to tell them that mine is the One Best Way. I am not trying to "prove something"; I genuinely feel that BOTH my baby and I are thriving in this arrangement.
I do understand that there are detectable differences in the quality of breastmilk refrigerated for 24 hours vs. straight from the tap, but these differences are tiny compared to the difference between breastmilk and formula. For MY OWN family, I feel that the advantages of continuing my career (recharging, feeling that I'm useful for more than one thing, contributing to the family income so that I feel justified in asking my partner to contribute to the childcare) far outweigh the disadvantage of slightly less nutritious milk. Other than the nursing issue, I don't see any important reason why a mother needs to be the only person who cares for her child.
really believes bio moms are so magical, how can they accept adoption???
Many people, including on these boards, told me I'd change my mind about WOH when my baby was born. I haven't, and I don't think it means I'm a terrible person or my baby and I have a weak attachment. I think it means I've found a wonderful sitter whom I trust and my baby adores
and I have a career in which I feel I am working toward a better society for my child AND everyone else.
I don't need Peggy O'Mara's approval to validate my life choices. I just hope she won't make WOHMs unwelcome here, because I think we have a lot to offer the community. After all, we too are AP mothers 24 hours a day!