Are you like us? - Page 2

[newmommy]

Originally Posted by maya44

I am considered alternative for not punishing and "allowing" swearing BUT we strongly believe in vaxing, your free time is just that, so other than monitoring for violent/overly sexual content, we allow "unlimited" media access (once your responsibilites have been met).Oh, and WE LOVE Disney World!!!!

hmm sounds like me too.

[seanjoshmom]

here we are!

ajsmom, we are mostly like you, except my DSs self-weaned at 1.5 years, and we vacccinated. We often feel like we are out of the mainstream, and that we baby or overprotect our kids, but at the same time, feel like all those things--TV, movies, theme parks, etc really don't add quality to anyone's life. I mean, there is really very little on TV that is worth watching. Movies--puhleez. And parks---they're still too small anyway. I think people think all those things are just harmless, but people do learn subtle messages and values from them, including racism, classicism, violence--in subtle ways--mean ways of speaking etc--consumerism, and our society is seriously messed up! And don't even get started on food--how much more can we as a society abuse our bodies?! (and I'm guilty here, but try).

[water]

Originally Posted by ajsmom

We only have relatives babysit but no one lives near so ds has only been sat 6 or so times for never more than 2 hours.

Well, we live near no one, so we do have a very trusted babysitter once in a while (like 3x a year)

We only watch videos or disks on our tv. We only see commercial tv when we travel. We let him spend lots of time with his cousin watching him play the gentler Mario Nintendo games when we visit. He hasn't played yet...

Only DVDs here, and only about 5 of them that I approve of. No TV, no video games either.

We don't eat high fructose corn syrup nor hydrogenated oils.

Nope, us neither, unless out at someone's party

We have never taken ds to a movie theater to see a movie.

Us neither!

We haven't vaccinated ds.

We have only given him DPT, starting at 2 years, and that will be it.

He nursed for 4 1/2 years.

4 years of nursing here, including 7 months of tandem nursing with baby sister!

We don't do "time outs" "go to your room" etc....

Yeah, no time outs here either

We haven't taken ds to any major theme parks.

No way! And we won't either, ugh those places sicken me

We somehow have very few character toys, just Thomas trains, even though ds knows who they are. We do have Matchbox, John Deere, Caterpillar, Lego...

Yup, Thomas, Lego, John Deere, :LOL I think we have the same toys!

We unschool.

Still deciding on this one, he's only 4

Am I swimming upstream?

Hey you seem perfectly normal to me! We should hang out! :LOL

[Mizelenius]

[QUOTE=ajsmom]Feeling a biit too unique these days so I was wondering...

We only have relatives babysit but no one lives near so ds has only been sat 6 or so times for never more than 2 hours. We've only had my mom or sister babysit, and rarely. I wouldn't mind more often, though!

We only watch videos or disks on our tv. We only see commercial tv when we travel. We let him spend lots of time with his cousin watching him play the gentler Mario Nintendo games when we visit. He hasn't played yet... DD can watch Noggin (even PBS has commercials) and her DVDs. I used to strive for TV-free days, but now that DD2 is here, I SUGGEST watching! DD also plays these games called "The Farm," "The Airport," and "The Jungle."

We don't eat high fructose corn syrup nor hydrogenated oils. We do. I cannot live without sweets!

We have never taken ds to a movie theater to see a movie. No way. WAY too loud and what movie is appropriate for a 3 y.o.?

We haven't vaccinated ds. We definitely vaccinate. We are pro-vax.

He nursed for 4 1/2 years. Nursed past 2, but I'd had enough. And I wanted to TTC.

We don't do "time outs" "go to your room" etc.... We've had some "go to your room" lately . . .this is all post-2nd baby.

We haven't taken ds to any major theme parks. No, but I'm not opposed to this. I'd love to take DD to Kiddieland. (I've never been.)

We somehow have very few character toys, just Thomas trains, even though ds knows who they are. We do have Matchbox, John Deere, Caterpillar, Lego... We have some, but mostly they have been gifts. The only ones we bought were Bob the Builder trucks and Angelina Ballerina stuffed animals. These have all been very well-loved toys.

We unschool. I love the concept, but DH isn't on board. Probably will go to a public school.

[my2girlsmama]

We only have relatives babysit but no one lives near so ds has only been sat 6 or so times for never more than 2 hours.

Us too. Just my parents/sister, and not much no overnighters.........

We have never taken ds to a movie theater to see a movie.

My oldest, 5.5 yrs, hasn't been to one nor wants to go.

We haven't vaccinated ds.

My oldest and the baby are delayed/selectively vaxxed...baby has only had 2 so far .............

He nursed for 4 1/2 years.

Oldest self weaned at 26 months and current nursling is going strong at 15 months old.

I certainly don't feel smug, superior, or special. It's just that after almost 5 years of parenting I find that there are just so many ways our parenting choices are different from family and friends.

Us too. While we do many commerical or mainstream type things here and there, overall we are very different in our parenting style from all of our friends and most family. But we like to think we're trendsetters!

[AngelaB]

I love reading all of your posts! Isnt diversity fantastic, if anything certainly entertaining.
So We dont have cable tv however my oldest son can walk 2 houses down to his Grandma Lindas and watch cartoons. He also spends alot of time with his cousin who is 2 years older. Cousin Corbin gets whatever he wants(literaly) and is not any happier than my son Sam. They compliment each other. Sam gets to play with corbin's toys and corbin gets a chance to share, considering hes an only child this is benificial for him. Corbin has become alot more like Sam since they have been hanging out and they love each other despite any differences.
Both of my children are mostly vaxed. If I had it to do over again I would not vax. This is a very touchy subject for me right now considering that my youngest has autism and coincidentaly it came about with his vax schedule. I beleive that vaxing if far more dangerous than not. When you vax you are definately putting toxins in babes body. There is at least a chance of not getting a disease where as with vaxing its a given that you are doing some harm. I would recomend reading Evidnce of Harm by David Kirby its nonbiased info on vaccines.
We have plastic toys however the boys get them from family who do the Birthday party. Sometimes we buy a sand toy or grandma will give them a dollar for the dollar store. We like spiderman and hulk and shrek and the incredibles because its fun for all of us to watch movies together. We do library movies the most though. We talk about spiders and what it would be like to be really strong and green and an ogre in society its all great fun with a 5 year old.
We are going to send our oldest to kindergarten in the fall however we are aware of the issues that conflict with our beleifs and are ready to deal with them even if it means homeschooling.
I wish I had the money to take my kids to the beach or carlsbad caverns or the mountains to camp and hike or canada or england or rome.....I would prefer that to disney land however I do remember going when I was three and it truly was magical!

[wildmonkeys]

I do many of the things that you mention, but maybe it isn't so much a decision for me so I don't notice, you know?

I mean, I have relatives close by and as someone who lost many relatives when I was young and had a bunch of fairly disinterested family members, I am always thrilled when a cool family member wants to spend time alone with either of my sons and build a special relationship so family pretty much covers us...

We don't watch much tv (don't even have cable) but ds1 seems to love characters....if he even hears a name once he is immediately "into" it/them...I think it is fine and even sort of cool : I mean, I still can't tell the difference between lots of fairly famous people and am always mixing them up (thus no examples!!!) it sort of shows he has an interest that my dp and I just simply don't, ykwim?

My kids happily self-weaned around 18 months, we did vax and believe (in principle) in the public school system --- which ds1 starts this fall.

We encourage the kids to sleep in their own beds but welcome them into our bed if they aren't comfortable on their own...

We don't use timeouts or "punishments" on the guys when they are little though I have started using them with my 5.5 yearold who functions on a much different level lately...

To me you don't sound that different in your parenting to many of the parents that we spend time with...

BJ
Barney & Ben

[villagemama]

ajsmom is my model and inspiration for parenting. I think we all try to do the best to give our children the tools to become happy, healthy adults. As a mom, it is my priority to make informed decisions regarding: discipline, eating habits, trappings of consumerism, physical and mental health, education, dangerous chemicals, etc. I am so grateful to be able to be able to stay at home with my boys. It is wonderful to be so close with them and it is very comforting to anticipate their needs and be able to provide them with the best.

This fall, my oldest son started preschool two days a week. Last Thursday, the snack was Hot Tamales (the red #40 candy), M&M's, pink wafer cookies, and pickles. I was horrified to say the least. However, I couldn't hardly lecture the teachers about how I think it is their responsibility to enforce (if not teach) good eating habits. There are other concerns I have with my son's preschool experience. He enjoys getting together with his friends (and we don't have any other regular play group).

Initially, we had several positive reasons for sending our son to preschool. Now, my husband and I are starting to consider the preschool's different values as a unacceptable. I think my husband is also starting to consider that similar issues will arise when (if?) our children start public school. Maybe homeschooling will be our future, afterall.

In summary, ajsmom I'd like to say "yes we are like you". It's too bad we had to move so far away... Small town wyoming is a great place to raise a family, but difficult to find a like-minded village.

[Stinkerbell]

Sorry to be ignorant..but what is "unschool"?

[Vito's Mommy]

We are a little similar. We buy as much organic as possible. Try to avoid preservatives/bad oils in foods. We do not vaccinate and never will, nor do we circ or believe in it. I am builiding a successful home based businees so we can send ds to a Waldorf School next year. We don't mind TV as long as it's limited. Love documentaries, Ms. Spider and Mr Rogers. We've been to the movies 3 times now and had a blast each time. Don't do circuses or any other type of animal cruelty. Would like to take ds and dh to Disneyland. Ds isn't much for characters unless it has to do w/dragons, knights, wizards and the like. We'll be taking a trip to Bonfonte Gardens for sure. As for sitters. Ds goes to my parents house once a week to play and garden...I get a break and work my biz. My neighbor watches ds from time to time, she is great w/him. A friend of ours from playgroup and I are setting up times to child swap once a week. She is a single mom and my dh works 16 hrs a day so it's nice for us to have some "me" time. (or stand in line at the P.O., fun!)
Ds loves to read and is great at playing on his own when I'm working. But we have 2 different playgroups a week plus library day and soccer on Fri. So we enjoy being home a few days a week and hangin out.

[callmemama]

I understand your uniqueness (you'll see why)!

We don't have relatives nearby either and ds (5.75yrs) has never had a sitter.

We only watch Muzzy Spanish videos and tornado warnings on TV.

We don't eat corn syrup or hydrogenated oils plus we're organic, whole foods vegan.

We have never taken ds to a movie theater to see a movie either.

He's still nursing at 5.75 years (although not much).

We don't do "time outs" "go to your room" etc..... We don't either but I've been frantically reading GD books lately because our easy-going little guy is not quite as easy-going as he used to be!

We haven't taken ds to any major theme parks either.

We somehow have very few character toys; the ones we do have ds knows from library books.

We unschool too!

Right now ds is splashing in the wading pool with his Papa in mid-September and the neighbor kids are just getting home from school.

Add only child and parents in their 40's to my list.

Yes, I'd say we're both swimming upstream! :LOL My ds is only beginning to read, but I understand the ramifications of no longer being able to shelter him (as much) from the world at large. I'm so grateful that he is still very much a child, and so very inquisitive! My gratitude list is long (even if I do worry about how ds will feel when he realizes just how "unique" we are).

[RubyWild]

That sounds a lot like us except that:

We have a babysitting co-op with a very close-knit group of moms and kids who trade "playdates."

My daughter has seen documentaries at a movie theater such as The Parrots of Telegraph Hill and March of the Penguins.

We don't own a TV.

We plan to homeschool, but probably a bit more formal than unschooling.

Otherwise, we sound the same; basically, very similar.

[ajsmom]

Not ignorant! Unschooling is...

You are not ignorant, just learning... Unschooling is a way of homeschooling. I prefer homelearning or child-led learning since school never rears it's head around here. I asked ds today if he wanted me to teach him about knights and he said "NO!" But when I made up a story with knights in it, he learned all about knights without being "taught"; what was I thinking!

I love that this thread has been revisited. Thank you Sarah! We may be miles apart now but our love doesn't care. It lives next door.

I hadn't posted for a long time beacause I got slammed and wounded, too sensitive for the boards that day I guess. With ds now hitting and kicking and learning about how powerful his body is while trying to control it during great anger or unhappiness I have been reading GD posts and reminding myself of all the techniques and ideas that have really helped and how wonderful and helpful you all are.

Just don't get me started about how long ago 40 was...ds was born when I was 41!

[jannan]

well, let's see...............

we've been once to disney land.
no hydrogenated oils.
only tv is dvd or at other peoples' houses.
some character toys.........nothing too obnoxious
she is vaxed
only my parents take care of her in my absense.
i try to have a balance
we've had fast food. the only thing she 'll eat is the french fries and milkshakes...........

i have sent her to her room. not for too long.

[ajsmom]

On occasion, when I am too angry to speak, I ask ds to go into his room until I can figure out what to do next. Sometimes he protests but I tell him I'm too angy to be nice and need a moment to collect my thoughts. This helps us both a lot because I've found that we tend to ramp up the energy in our words when we are in conflict and that isn't always good. I am not a very relaxed person so I need to focus on gentler ways to speak and respond.

We love In and Out Burger so our fast food fix happens about once a quarter when we go to Gilroy.

[LunaMom]

We only have relatives babysit but no one lives near so ds has only been sat 6 or so times for never more than 2 hours.

You didn't give your son's age, but until DD was about 2 1/2, we only had grandparents babysit, too, and it was pretty rarely. We also made sure that if the GPs were putting DD to bed, that we left BEFORE bedtime, so she would see us leave. We didn't want her to go to bed with us there and then possibly wake up and not understand why we weren't there.

We only watch videos or disks on our tv. We only see commercial tv when we travel. We let him spend lots of time with his cousin watching him play the gentler Mario Nintendo games when we visit. He hasn't played yet...

My daughter is now 6 1/2 and still watches almost no commercial tv. She watches videos or PBS, and has only started watching a couple of Animal Planet shows with commercials, and I hate the fact that the commercials are there. She watches very little television to begin with, though - no more than one 30 minute program on school days and no more than two on weekends.

We don't eat high fructose corn syrup nor hydrogenated oils.

Can't say we don't eat them at all, but I avoid them as much as possible.

We have never taken ds to a movie theater to see a movie.

We didn't take DD to see a movie until she was about 3. We knew that she was capable of following a plot pretty well and had a long enough attention span to sit quietly through it.

We haven't vaccinated ds.

DD is vaccinated, though our doc was cautious and used a "gentler" schedule than most.

He nursed for 4 1/2 years.

DD self-weaned after she learned to walk (15 months).

We don't do "time outs" "go to your room" etc....

Neither do we, most of the time. Occasionally DD will need to go to her room, but it's for something that makes sense!

We haven't taken ds to any major theme parks.

We did do Disneyworld last winter, and have to say we loved it. We did it "our way," though - no insane spending on souvenirs, we brought in healthy snacks rather than buy crap all day, etc.

We somehow have very few character toys, just Thomas trains, even though ds knows who they are. We do have Matchbox, John Deere, Caterpillar, Lego...

We limit "character stuff" too, not just toys but everything else. We never wanted DD to be a walking advertisement. Sure, she has some stuff, but not nearly the amount that other kids seem to have.

We unschool.

Nope, we send DD to public school. We live in a good district and so far it's working fine for our family.

So, I'm not just like you, but I definitely stand out as "different in most crowds. Some other differences are that DD doesn't take dance - it seems to be a requirement for little girls around here, and also, she has fewer extracurricular activities than most kids, period. I know kids her age who do dance, Girl Scouts, piano, soccer...it's nuts. Oh, and DD's lunches surprise people. She'll bring cut-up veggies and hummus and kids will say, "What IS that stuff? It looks gross!" She had yellow grape tomatoes yesterday that we got from a local farm stand and both the assistant principal and the teacher's aide asked if they were grapes!