Homebirthing Mama Thread (All Due Dates)! - Page 3

[MelissaEvans]

Hi mommies!
This is my second baby, first homebirth. Baby's due 02/06.
The first was a planned natural hospital birth that turned c/sec (and I think it wasn't needed). To try another hospital birth would be really hard, especially now because of the VBAC part. So, instead of fighting (no EFM, no IV, movement, food, no time limits, no way for induction...) which they'd insist on becuase of the VBAC - never mind all those things just put a mom on the path towards another section - we're just going to enjoy a nice peaceful homebirth. Maybe water birth. =)

I loved "Baby Catcher" too - especially the story about the geese. I was laughing so hard it hurt. =)

We've got time for prepping, but I want to read "Adventures in Tandem Nursing," "Rebounding from Childbirth," and "The VBAC Companion." Rebounding has been ordered, but I don't have it yet. I want to make sure that all anger/fear/issues are resolved so they don't hinder me this round. I'm feeling so much better than I did a year ago about the icky birth with #1. Now I'm just making sure I avoid that pain and listen to my heart instead! =)

[aishy]

Hello All! I am expecting #4 in late October, but since Ive had them all early I'm thinking early October! This is our girl, finally, finding out was too big a temptation to resist!! Its my 3rd homebirth. First was a freestanding birthing center which was almost as good as home (except the bumpy drive there), second was born in my parents home (we lived in apartments), third in the duplex we were renting, and we finally own our own home! I've used the same midwife for all my pregnancies/births from the beginning. It's been fun watching her birth numbers go up, up, up as well as knowing shes more and more experienced with each of my births (she had only been attending births for 1-2 years when I had my first). I believe im her 3rd 4th time-er

As for preperation, It is just occuring to me that I will need to be ready in three months. Guess it is time to start buying supplies & getting something together for the boys. I was thinking about doing a baby-time treasure box. They won't be around for most of the labor/birth (hoping its at night so they are home - i hate the thought of them having to go elsewhere) but they are all SO excited about their sister.

Baby Hopes I've seen you post on the HAND list. I've attended one meeting and am hoping to be at next months. I thought I would make June's but my friend had a baby that day & I got to be there. I live in FW so its a bit of a drive for me, but worth it. Good luck on finding a midwife when you arrive! Isn't technology too cool that you can email and start working on interviewing in that way?? My midwife is Molly Germash (who is very involved with HAND, so i'm sure you've seen her posts).

Aisling

[Jlcampbellkidz]

EDD Feb 15,2006

So excited about this thread.
Little bit of info on me. This is my 4th pregnancy, 3rd baby. I had a little girl (Breaunna Faith) at 37 weeks in the hospital with a doula on April 4, 2002. Water was broken with no contractions for 32 hours, then pit was started. After many interventions and an unplanned epidural. She was born vaginally late that night. She had some breathing problems at first but was fine. So would have been a c-sec.if my doula had not been there. We had a miscarriage in Aug 2003. It was very disapointing. I wanted a HB with DD #2 but couldn't convince my DH. So I hired a midwife that delivers in the hospital. I stayed at home and labored and arrived in active labor at the hospital. Gabriella Analiese was born All Natural several hours after we arrived. She was a big baby 9lb. 7oz and the midwife did a lot of pulling and she ended having a shoulder distocha. I loved this midwife throughout pregnancy but felt like there was much she could have done differently before pulling and causing the collar bone to break. She was born at 39 weeks on July 30, 2004. So Here we are pregnant with baby #3 (totally a surprise) I guess all my hard work payed off because apon announcing my pregnancy to my DH he asked what midwife I would be using for our homebirth. Amazing I was totally prepared to just do it on my own this time regardless of his support, but he is supporting the idea completely. We have chosen a well loved midwife in the Dallas area. Dinah Waranch. She is very gentle and loves to let mom or dad catch the baby. She is very hands off which is great. I am so excited about comming back to nature and experincing birth the way I feel it was meant to be.

[Emilie]

Emilie- 2nd birth- 1st homebirth 11/05
We had a very bad care hospital birth- the nurses were mean and nasty and did not want to deal with me- I switched doctors at the end- cause my doc was insisting on a induction 2 weeks before due date since he was going on vacation. Did not even know my doctor really. Lots of 2 hour waiting room waits. Nurses who tried to help me breastfeed had NEVER breastfed and infant( bleck!) We are still nursing strong after 2 years!( luckily!)
Ended up with high bp- baby taken for over 3 hours to warm up. Cervidil- Epidural-
NEVER AGAIN!
Just got done reading Birthing From Within- LOVE IT!

[teachinmaof3]

Aisling ~ How funny we have exactly the opposite dc!! I've been feeling the exact same way about preparing!! It's like it just hit me a week or so ago that it's already almost July! :LOL My girls will be here so I need to get my act together and start preparing them!

Laurie ~ How cool about your dh asking the mw and homebirth!

Hello everyone else!

Not much to report here. Like I mentioned to Aisling, I have GOT to start making preparations for this birth, especially with my girls.

[Baby Hopes]

Wow! I really need to update the list. We've got ladies coming in faster than I can keep up. Promise, I'll work on it first thing in the morning.

Aisling, I have emailed back and forth with Molly several times. I can't believe how helpful she's been. If I could find a way to get Tricare (our insurance) to pay for a CPM, I'd sign her up sight-unseen. Change of subject a bit, my Mom didn't make the June meeting either, but intends to go to the July's meeting. It's a bit more relevant to for her anyways. In fact she's talked my Dad into going with her.

JLCampbellkidz, I've got an interview with Dinah on the 18th of October. (Also have an interview with Becky Burpo on the 17th of October, although she's much further away and, as I understand it, won't be able to take on a homebirth at that distance if her plate is already full at the birthing center for November.) You'll have to keep me posted on how you like her.

[megpaw]

Well, I told my mom and sister that we would be having this baby at home, and although I know it was unavoidable, I really wish I had found a way to keep the news to myself. They kept hounding me about which OB we were going to use, which hospital we would deliver at, yada yada, so I told them we are going to have the baby at home attended by a midwife. You would have thought I had told them that we were going to fly to the moon. The first word's out of my sister's mouth were "That's just not smart." Ugh. It doesn't help that she works in the PR department of one of the local hospitals. My mom is more concerned about what if X-Y-Z happens. I've tried reassuring her, but she's just going to worry. She asks a lot of questions, but she is basically respectful of our decision. My sister, however, said to me that I "always have to do things the hard way," and that "I'm not thinking about the baby," and all sorts of other crap. Most times I can just tune her out, but it's really hard with this. It also doesn't help that she lives with us. *sigh*

I know that it isn't my responsibility to make them comfortable, but I hate the tension that it is causing in our house and our relationships. No matter how much info I give them, they are still unsupportive. And it hurts that they think that I would put my baby at risk just to be different or difficult. They just can't seem to understand that I'm doing this because I know it is the safest way for our baby to come into the world.

Sorry for the rant. I've just been feeling really alone lately. Thank goodness I have dh and you ladies!

[mom2threenurslings]

Meghan !!! It's not easy dealing with family members who aren't supportive. It's also difficult to remember that part of their concern is their love for you and baby. I hope you're able to work through things and they become more supportive of you ... or at least keep their opinions to themselves!

My grandmother asks me tons of questions every time I see her. She's SO worried about all the what-ifs. I actually don't mind her asking me these questions because it just reaffirms my decision to birth my baby at home!

I was just thinking....could you, after being questioned and defending your decision to birth at home, thank your family members for asking the questions and helping you re-affirm your decision over and over again. Maybe then they'll leave you alone! :LOL

[andreac]

Mehgan, not sure if they are open at all, but here is a link to a story about the new study that just came out showing the safetly of planned homebirths. I've been pretty lucky so far...anyone who doesn't agree with me seems to be keeping their mouths shut :LOL

If your mom is just worried maybe having her come to one of your prenatals so she could ask you midwife questions might be helpful. They are pretty used to dealing with concerned family i'm sure and wouldn't mind!

Your sister, on the other hand, isn't being respectful of your choices and I would just try and tell her that this isn't up for discussion at all!

[megpaw]

Thanks, ladies. I e-mailed my sister a copy of the study, so hopefully she'll read it and share it with mom, and then maybe they'll leave me alone! I don't mind answering questions, I guess it's just that no matter what I say, they aren't satisfied with the answers. I also asked my mom if she wanted to attend the initial consultation with the midwife with us, and she said, "It won't change anything." *sigh* Maybe I can convince her to come along on a later visit.

andreac, I think you are absolutely right about my sister and I'm probably just going to tell her to back off the next time she brings up the topic.

[honeybee]

Hi! I'm pregnant with my second child, due around the first week of March (which happens to be the same week of dh's, my brother's, and my birthdays!). I had a good, unmedicated hospital birth with ds. But this time, "good" is not good enough! Dh and I are interviewing homebirth midwives next week.

Melissa

[nancy926]

Due in August!

I'm due mid-August and this will be our first homebirth. DD was born in a freestanding birth center...which was kinda like giving birth at someone else's house. Pretty cool. There are no freestanding bcs in Vermont, though. We had started getting care at a hospital-affiliated bc but it was too much of a medical/interventionist/we just do this stuff because that's how we do it sorta place. I love the midwife and attendants we found to do the hb and am really excited about it! It makes the Wee One's birth seem more a part of life and less an Event That Must Be Prepared For. Not that we're not preparing for it....it's kinda hard to explain.

We told my sister and DH's mom, but no other close relatives. I'm not sure my dad and stepmom would "get it", and they're too far away to do much about it anyway, so we'll just let them know afterward.

anyway...I'm looking forward to reading this thread and hearing about all the hb'ed babies!

Nancy

[Jlcampbellkidz]

Mehgan: Big hugs, Reading your post, made me think you were writing about me and my sister. There was even a lady at church who said Wow your brave, I just couldn't have a HB because if something happened to the baby then I couldn't forgive myself for being so selfish" I almost fell over when she said it. Both of hers have been C-sec, the 2nd just scheduled and she thought it was wonderful. We come from totally different worlds. I won't go as far to say that woman that have hospital births don't care about themselves or thier babies so I don't think someone should say that about woman who choose hb. Personally I feel scared in the hospital. I feel that most problems that occor, are because of routine interventions and i hope to have a much more peaceful and natural experience this time around.

[famousmockngbrd]

Just wanted to check in and let you all know I am still pregnant. I'm starting to get a little antsy.

It must be so hard to not be supported by your close relatives. I am lucky that, despite the fact that they have reservations and probably flat out think we are crazy, both our families have kept their negative thoughts to themselves and have been mostly supportive.

So, a question for you mamas - are CPMs legal in your state? They aren't in mine. Just CNMs, and they have to work under the supervision of an OB, so they don't get much autonomy.

[andreac]

Hey famous...sending labor thoughts your way

CPMs in my state (CT) are a-legal...there is no legislation for or against them. MW organizations are working to change that. I tend to think that we are better off w/NO state regulation...that way women have true freedom of choice when it comes to their births...it is about what they and their care provider are comfortable with...not what the state says is allowed.

[MelissaEvans]

Originally Posted by Jlcampbellkidz

There was even a lady at church who said Wow your brave, I just couldn't have a HB because if something happened to the baby then I couldn't forgive myself for being so selfish"

Have you seen this cartoon?
http://www.thecowgoddess.com/cowardice.html
I agree with Hathor, it takes more courage to give birth in a hospital!

[jools]

hello!

I'm Julie in Washington State, planning my first HB really SOON! EDD is July 27; expecting a second boy. Big brother Justin was born at 41w 3d so I *think* this little guy will also take his sweet time getting here, but who knows! I birthed Justin in a free-standing birth center and it was fabulous... this time I don't have to ride in the fricking CAR!

[teachinmaof3]

Meghan

Hi Melissa, Nancy and Julie

famous ~ It's my understanding that they are a-legal here in OK.

Melissa ~ LOVE the Hathor cartoon! I've wanted so many times to tell ladies who comment that THEY are the brave ones. But I just nod and smile. :LOL


Nothing exciting here except I feel like nesting......again. :LOL My bedroom is driving me nuts! I really want to rearrange it so there is more room by the bed and bathroom for the pool..just like we had it for my last birth. I have no idea why it's bugging me so much today. :LOL You'd think from the way I'm feeling/acting that this kid is due in a few weeks. I did curb some of that need for nesting by reorganizing and putting away some baby clothes that a friend gave me. That helped....some.

[mom2threenurslings]

Hi Mamas!

I got a "Wow, you're brave!" comment today while out to lunch with my mom, dad and 3 kids (after my midwife appointment!) today. I commented to my mom that every time I hear that I think ... "No, you'd have to be brave to have your baby in a hospital!" She said it never dawned on her about the number of people who could have access to the baby, the number of illnesses mom and baby could get, the number of things that could go wrong, etc. in a hospital.

My mw drew a pic of baby's position on my belly for my kids today...they thought it was neat (and added a face and hair when we got home!). Baby had head right above my belly button, bum on my right side and arms and legs hanging down...facing backwards. Strange position! The midwife let the kids feel baby's head, then they lost interest and went back to the play area. She poked and prodded a bit more, confirmed that I haven't had an u/s and then said, "Well, you're not measuring too many weeks ahead." The kids were antsy, so we left without me questioning what exactly she meant, but I'm guessing possibly polyhydramnios (or my more paranoid side ... twins!). I guess if the other midwife seems concerned in two weeks I'll talk to her about it. My babies tend to be in all sorts of positions until the end of pregnancy (making me paranoid about malpresentation during those final weeks), so I'm hoping baby is vertex by 38 weeks and stays that way! Only 11 weeks left until my EDD...EEEK!

[orangebird]

Originally Posted by andreac

Hey famous...sending labor thoughts your way

CPMs in my state (CT) are a-legal...there is no legislation for or against them. MW organizations are working to change that. I tend to think that we are better off w/NO state regulation...that way women have true freedom of choice when it comes to their births...it is about what they and their care provider are comfortable with...not what the state says is allowed.

I agree, but I like how our law is written here in Utah, with optional licensing so that midwives who want to have the option of offering drugs (pitocin for hemorage, lidocaine for suturing, oxygen, etc) can have that option but the midwives who aren't interested in those things can still practice legally without regulations.

LOL at the "wow, you're brave" comments. I hear this all the time and can't believe women don't realize how brave they are for going to the hospital.