"You are really going to miss being pregnant..."

[Pelgie]

... says a co-worker to me a few days ago. And I say to her, "the ability to create a life is a wonderful thing... but I honestly won't miss being pregnant." She looks at me like I'm crazy and says that she always missed being pregnant when she wasn't and has felt a small emptiness inside sine her last pregnancy (20 years ago). Then she re-states- "you are going to miss being pregnant."

I feel bad like I'm a bad mommy/woman... but I honestly can't relate to this statement one iota. I love kids, I love that I'm able to have kids, I feel a deep empathy for those struggling with fertility issues, but to be completely honest- I do not like being pregnant. End of story. I count the days until it is overwith and I have my new baby to hold. After my last son, I enjoyed every single day of not being pregnant until this pregnancy started. I'm sure I'll feel the same when this one is finally over. And believe me, I'm counting the days until then.

In fact, I've been looking forward to putting all of my maternity clothes in a bag and giving them away. I think about that often.

Anyone else willing to admit to this?

[soccerchic21]

[QUOTE=PelgieThen she re-states- "you are going to miss being pregnant."

[/QUOTE]

: I don't think I will "miss" this pregnancy at all :LOL

The only thing I missed after DD was born was occasionally you get the gas bubble that feels like baby movement and it was like "awww" You know the life is moving inside of me awww feeling I missed that sometimes....but hugging and kissing them in person is so much better.

[ewe+lamb]

When I was pregnant with dd I was really healthy, comfortable, didn't put on weight etc and yes once she was with me and I had her in my arms I missed being pregnant but looking after the baby sort of took over and I forgot that but I remember saying to someone that I would be quite happy to be pregnant the day after her birth!!! OMG did I actually say that!!!

I have really enjoyed this pregnancy again but this last month I must admit I could really do without it the heat, swelling joints, having to travel on public transport, hip and pelvic pain and now wish that it was all over - so what I think I am saying is that I can relate to you both. I dont think that I would miss pregnancy after 20 years however, no I can honestly say that I think I wont, I love being pregnant and producing life and all the other things you mentioned but there's is no denying that at times it is really hard and to all of you who really suffer during pregnancy I think it would be a nightmare.

No I don't think you are a bad mother/woman for saying this at all moreover I think that there are few women that feel the same as your co-worker. But at the end of the day we're all different - there's nothing wrong with feeling different from someone else - doesn't mean that your a bad person just different from somebody else.

[Shanana]

Um, can you say "projection"?? I hate it when people think that you should feel / think the same way they do. Each of us has our own unique experience, and while she's perfectly entitled to "miss" being pregnant, that in no way means that EVERY woman should feel that way. (Although I'll admit the fact that she's still missing it 20 years later seems slightly pathological :LOL .)

Of course, there are many joyful things to being pregnant, and I too will miss the feeling of her moving inside me, being so close to her, etc. But I'm 35.5 weeks now, and I cannot WAIT for this to be over.

I wonder if the fact that your co-worker was pregnant TWENTY YEARS AGO allows her to be all nostalgiac about it. It sure is "easy" to miss being pregnant, when you're not suffering from morning sickness, toting around an extra 40+ pounds, have ankles the size of softballs, have horrible back pain, heartburn, constipation, hemmorhoids, gas, can't eat/drink what you want, etc. Or maybe she was just one of the lucky few who had a wonderful pregnancy with few or no physical complaints?

Regardless, you are not a bad mom/woman, and she had no right to tell you how you "should" feel!!

Shana
EDD 7/29/05

[NordicMamma]

I am not going to miss this pregnancy, that is for sure.

But maybe I'll look back in 20 years time with nostalgia as well.

[QueenMommy]

I will not miss being pregnant at all! I thibk it's great that I can do it and sustain the life in me and birth and all, but I would rather have the baby on the outside. There is so much I have trouble doing right now that I want to be able to do!

[Max's Mami]

I had an awsome pregnancy w/ Maxi - I really enjoyed most of it (other than the 6 weeks of m/s in the begining and the last 2 weeks when I was overdue) and I honestly did miss being pregnant after I had him. Like, really missed it a lot.

I swore to myself when I got pregnant again I would remember that and try to cherish it more.

Well this pregnancy has been another story - much harder, physically and emotionally. I keep telling myself I am going to miss it and to appreciate this time - since it will most likely be my last baby - but I am having a hard time not wishing for it to be over.

I love feeling the baby move and the anticipation of her arrival but I am pretty miserable! I guess we will see how I feel about it after she is born!

[bri276]

Maybe because this will be my only child but there will probably be some things I will miss. Not that I enjoyed pregnancy- no, way too emotionally stressful because I've had a hard time not constantly worrying about the baby. But to think these are the last few days/weeks of a baby being right inside me, with me at all times, yes now I'm crying. lol.
But I can totally understand and believe others if they say they won't miss it. It's probably very easy after 20 years to forget what it feels like to desperately want a glass of wine, or to have backackes, or to feel nauseous, and be emotionally unstable....etc. It's no walk in the park.

[MamanFrancaise]

Maybe we all won't miss being pregnant but I think there will come a time where we look back on being pregnant with great fondness and pride. I doubt anyone would miss the aches and pains and morning sickness. I will miss my big beautiful round belly and the wonderful attention I get with being pregnant. LOL

[soccerchic21]

Originally Posted by MamanFrançaise

I will miss my big beautiful round belly and the wonderful attention I get with being pregnant. LOL

Actually one thing I know I will miss is being able to wear tight shirts that are fitting to my belly because Lord knows I can't pull that off when I am not pregnant. :LOL

[IAmAMamaToLogan]

I missed being pregnant with both boys and I had kind of cruddy pregnancies. This time I KNOW I will miss being pregnant because I've thoroughly enjoyed it. For me, it's that pregnancy is so simple compared to dealing with a new baby. :-\

But I don't think it's something every woman should or will feel.

[jeanieloz]

I never missed being pregnant! I am always so happy when labor begins knowing I won't be pregnant much longer!!!! It's a great motivator to push that baby out!
Donna

[leosmama20]

I never ONCE missed being pregnant. In fact, seeing pregnant women reminds me of being pregnant and just makes me cringe. Sorry to say. But, if I had different pregnancies, I am sure I would feel different.

[Max's Mami]

Originally Posted by leosmama20

I never ONCE missed being pregnant. In fact, seeing pregnant women reminds me of being pregnant and just makes me cringe. Sorry to say. But, if I had different pregnancies, I am sure I would feel different.

I was thinking of you when I read this thread - thinking "that is one mama for sure who wont miss it!" But who can blame you - you have had such a rough time!

[cheeseRjedi]

everyone says this to me too and i totally agree with erika.

i'll miss feeling the baby inside me and i'll miss everyone treating me special, but i don't think i'll miss being pregnant. i am so sick of not being able to sleep (although life with a new babe won't help this ), not being able to move around easily, swollen feet, backaches, heartburn, or mynon-functioning hands (i could hardly brush my teeth this morning).

[Pom]

Originally Posted by soccerchic21

Actually one thing I know I will miss is being able to wear tight shirts that are fitting to my belly because Lord knows I can't pull that off when I am not pregnant. :LOL

EXACTLY!

I will miss the tight belly, the movements. But everythign else? NO WAY. I think I enjoyed the first one more b/c it was new, and I didn't have DD to run around after, I had less experience in seeing what could go wrong. I could rest more, slack off, etc. This has been really hard for me. But of course, I am thrilled that I CAN do it.


TOTAL projection. I can't stand it when people tell me how I'll think. Even if they're right!'

But 20 yrs from now? Who knows? All this promise inside, hope for the future. Maybe this woman's life went downhill, and the pg times were her best???? May that not be us!!!

[Kaitnbugsmom]

I will miss being pregnant. This has been my most interesting and sometimes my most difficult pregnancy. But it's also my last, and I'm not as thrilled with that fact as I thought I would be. This is the first pregnancy I've had the time, resources and support to truly enjoy. I know the coming weeks and months will more than make up for the slight loss, but it still 'bums me out' to borrow a phrase from my six year old, to realize that I will never again know the blessing of creating another human being. It's like my beloved says though, at least this time I got the baby belly I always coveted...

[shayinme]

Its been 13 years between babies and while this pregnancy is far better than things with my son, I don't really see myself missing being pregnant. Compared to many women, I can't say its been a bad experience, actually its been even enjoyable at times. Yet I like being in control of my body, I am not comfortable with the attention people give to pregnant women and how at times it feels like an invasion of my personal space. If I get one more comment on my pregnant state I will scream! :

Shay

[CherryBomb]

I think that's true for a lot of women, but definitely not all! When someone said that to me while I was pregnant with my daughter I thought they were nuts, but after her birth, I found it to be true. I seem to have easy pregnancies though, not even any morning sickness! They only thing that stinks is I have a "fairly significant" seperation of my abdominal muscles that gives me nasty back pains, but meh.

[kemmasmom]

I always tell my husband that those women that say they love being pregnant and would do it over and over again are crazy high.

I WILL NOT miss being pregnant, and I WILL NOT feel bad about it! I am NOT a happy pregnant lady. I LOVE LOVE LOVE the end result, but the road to get there is a toughy! And I am okay with that.