I killed the tooth fairy this morning . . .

[snuggly mama]

Ds (8) came downstairs this morning crying because the tooth fairy forgot him again. I'm tired of lying about the whole thing, and I don't like him feeling like he did something "wrong" to make the tooth fairy forget. (Reality, of course, is that dh and I had no cash in the house, then fell asleep before remembering it was a tooth night). So, dh and I decided to kill the tooth fairy this morning --we told ds that she's just part of imagination, not a real thing. He was, predictably, upset.

I'm not ready to send Santa back just yet (though probably after the holidays, Santa will retire!), and we never really invited the Easter Bunny. I feel crummy about this situation, but I also think that continuing to lie to him would've been worse. What do you mamas think?

[Alkenny]

My older two both "found out" around kindergarten age. One good thing about public school...they get to be the "bad guys".

[dharmamama]

Was your son more upset about being "forgotten" by the tooth fairy or more upset that the tooth fairy isn't real?

I would have outed the tooth fairy, too.

Namaste!

[wende]

DD2 figured out all on her own that the tooth fairy wasn't real. She said "the tooth fairy never came when you didn't have any money".

I think you did the right thing. I'm sorry that it wasn't an easier experience though

[A&A]

I have to tell you that I STILL remember how bad I felt the day the tooth fairy forgot me and my mom told me the truth.

Not only did a complete stranger forget me but my own MOTHER forgot me!!! That made it worse, not better. :

[Stevie]

My bigger kids know that Santa and the tooth fairy are a game we play. Then DD she can remind me before she goes to bed :LOL
I have also told her that if she tells another child who believes, then we stop playing the game Saves her same age friends from finding out the truth before their own parents are ready...

[lilyka]

I gues smy children have never truely believed in the tooth fairy or santa clause for this reason (if I forget or and the dispairity in awards - i mean how do you explain to a child the the TF gives suzie $20 and you only get $1-$2 or that Santa brings you 1 gift but bily got 10. I remevber agonizing over the santa thing as a child. I mean what exactly did I have to do to get that many gifts? was I not better than billy?)

So anyway i don't know what I would have done in your situation. I probbly would have made something up to sooth the dissapointment of the tooth fairy not haveing time, big tooth loss day etc and then once she got over that sadness, during a completely neutral time explained that tothfairy and santa are just make believe stories.

[Starr]

Just a question, but how did yo uexplain it to him? I thinks it goes much better when parents explain it before the child is waiting for the prize/ money in the morning and break it gently. I would have told him in between visits for the TF instead of after the fact that he was counting on the TF to come. But I feel a lot of it has to do with how it is explained.

[snuggly mama]

I agree with a few of the posters here who said that perhaps we could have handled this better. I guess I was just so frustrated with the whole concept (I mean, who decided that money needed to be involved in this ritual, anyway? : ) . I neglected to mention that we have, on several past occassions, been able to "sneak" the cash into the room in the morning and then let the kids think that it fell out of the pillowcase or whatever. I tried that this time, but ds caught me. I figured fessing up was better than yet another lie. He's definitely upset about TF not being real, but I'm not feeling too badly about that. It's often worse, I think, to be the ONLY kid who still believes when everyone else knows the truth.

My only hope is that the revealing of Santa goes much, much better than this. . .

[MamaBug]

I am so sorry that this was so upsetting to you and your ds. My boys are 5 & 7 and though they still believe I know it's only a matter of time before they figure it out or someone tells them. My ds recently lost his first tooth and he was actually very upset that the TF took the tooth, even though he knew "she" was going to. I told him I would get it back but I was very hard pressed not to just tell the truth. : The next morning the TF left him his tooth for his mommy to keep and a note saying that in the future she would not take the teeth but still leave a surprise.

lilyka has a great point about this. I mean for months before we lost the tooth I did "research" too see what the going rate was so that ds would not feel bad he didn't get what Johnny did, kwim? It's the same thing with Santa and presents, though I do have to say for the most part he and his friends do not talk about how much they get.

Hopefully your Santa talk goes easier!