Thoughts On This?

[KnitterMama]

I was watching the extras that came with the Coach Carter DVD, and they had an interview with his (Carter's) family. He had something like 6 sisters. They were talking about his Mother's tactic for keeping everyone in line ... when one child broke the rules, everyone was disciplined for it. I presume this was limited to rule-breaking and not to tantrums, etc (which others can't really account for).

I don't think older siblings should be responsible for younger ones necessarilly, but I do think it is beneficial when everyone looks-out for everyone, especially in a large family. This also seems like a good way to teach that our actions affect others not just in direct ways, but indirect ways as well. Kind of like social responsibility, kwim?

Thoughts?

[alegna]

That sounds evil to me.
First off- why should everyone get in trouble for what one child does? Not fair.

Second, I don't want my children to "parent" each other.

Third- this sets up for some bullying-type situations among siblings.

Fourth- this also is a great set-up for lying to mom and dad.

Fifth- what if one child doesn't mind the punishment- and does the "crime" to bug the other kids?

Sixth through 457- this is not at all a real life situation. How would you like it if you were pulled over and given a speeding ticket because some other guy was speeding?

-Angela

[kaydee]

Originally Posted by alegna

That sounds evil to me.
First off- why should everyone get in trouble for what one child does? Not fair.

Second, I don't want my children to "parent" each other.

Third- this sets up for some bullying-type situations among siblings.

Fourth- this also is a great set-up for lying to mom and dad.

Fifth- what if one child doesn't mind the punishment- and does the "crime" to bug the other kids?

Sixth through 457- this is not at all a real life situation. How would you like it if you were pulled over and given a speeding ticket because some other guy was speeding?

-Angela

:

(Of course, what do I know? I'm an only child who is the parent of an only child! )

[party_of_seven]

Originally Posted by alegna

That sounds evil to me.
First off- why should everyone get in trouble for what one child does? Not fair.

Second, I don't want my children to "parent" each other.

Third- this sets up for some bullying-type situations among siblings.

Fourth- this also is a great set-up for lying to mom and dad.

Fifth- what if one child doesn't mind the punishment- and does the "crime" to bug the other kids?

Sixth through 457- this is not at all a real life situation. How would you like it if you were pulled over and given a speeding ticket because some other guy was speeding?

-Angela

:

[SagMom]

Originally Posted by swimmin_mama

I don't think older siblings should be responsible for younger ones necessarilly, but I do think it is beneficial when everyone looks-out for everyone,

While I agree with this, I'm with the other responders in that it's completely unfair to reprimand everyone for what one person does. In our family, if someone does something dangerous or unkind or whatever, we talk to THAT person. It's just unfair, illogical, and mean to drag everyone else into it. (I remember our whole class being made to stay in at recess because one kid did something wrong--how in the world were we to stop him from saying/doing what got him into trouble?) I think there's an excellent chance that that method would foster anger and resentment.

[MusicLadyToo]

I have to agree that it causes "issues" when eveyrone gets in trouble for one person's crime. There were many times growing up, I got in trouble as the oldest because no one fessed up to the offense and I should have stopped it. We all finally get along as adults but there were some harsh feelings in our young years. JMHO