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Janulicious July #3 - Page 24

post #461 of 535
oh yes postcard from FL! I love manatees well ok I love all animals
post #462 of 535
I don't have the car today. My MIL is supposed to be coming over sometime in the afternoon. I'm not sure about my mom.

That's just going to make it worse, though. They're just going to get her all wound up. Same thing with going out somewhere. The problem is that we've been out of the house two days in a row now and she hasn't had much of an opportunity to sleep. I don't think I should take her out anymore. Maybe 1 hour once a week or something. It always throws everything off.

I left her in the swing for half an hour and she didn't sleep. I'm trying to think of what could be white noise. It's too cold here for the fan.

She's scooting around the floor with a plastic keys thing now. She can hardly hold herself up she's so tired. I'm afraid if I take the toy away she'll have a screaming fit again.

I don't really think she hates me. I think she hates nursing because she knows she'll fall asleep if she does it too long. I think that's why she wants to nurse for 5 minutes every hour or so. She stops before she's full because she starts to feel sleepy. I think she's entirely too much like her father in regards to sleep. And honestly, I'm starting to get sick of nursing. I'm sick of being clung to constantly, sick of being pinched and chewed on and slapped and kicked. Sick of no one being able to do anything with her but me. If I hear "oh, I'd help you out with her, but you're still nursing" one more time I'm going to scream. Does this mean it's no longer mutually desireable? :

She's starting to not want to be with anyone but me. Mike couldn't hold her for 5 minutes last night because she was screaming. I tried to get him to put her to bed last night and he refused to even try. It was all I could do to get a shower and get my laundry hung up. I didn't actually get anything to eat until after midnight when I finally put her down on the floor and just let her scream at me. I'm starting to feel like a single parent. I wish I was, at least I wouldn't have a third person to take care of.

So that's where I'm at right now. I guess I'm just tired. The only doctor that I could trust, the only advice he could give me was Ferber. Anyone else would tell me that, and to wean. It's about as crunchy as yesterday's cheerios around here.
post #463 of 535
Jeni, NCSS is gentle and is sleep training. But it's more natural than Ferber I really did dig the parts about how to get baby to sleep w/o nipple/paci in the mouth, and I'd like to do that, but right now L really needs the paci and the comfort suck w/swallow for pain, so no go. But maybe in a few months. Could you try a different room/bed for a few nights? For whatever reason Lauren was in such a funk here with the waking constantly and such, and the first night in a different place (mom's) she slept SO well. And last weekend she did ok here too, but I was up late to spend time with dh, so I was still tired. We'll see how tonight goes, although I might be up late to get dh from the airport. The bit I dind't like was the "you must be consistent for 10-30 days" on nap schedule and bedtime, I just don't have the kind of life to give to making a nap schedule stick around here, I really enjoy that I can run out with her anytime and she'll nap when we get home. Could be that's my problem at night because of it, but I can't force my life into a clock.

Happiest baby - it's geared toward newborns, swaddle, swing, shhh, suck and uhh? stomach position I think.

We've managed to control the ants here. But my parents have a problem now. Go figure. And so did my friends that I was visiting. We have a wet basement problem instead.

Oooh Joyce, tell me all about your visit! I want details! And the plan you've got now.

Lauren reacted to peanut butter. Poor baby butt is welty and red and must hurt a lot. And she's spitting up constantly, even with meds. I need to write out my food list and put it on the fridge so I can remember everything that is ok and not ok.

Kathy, is it the real Iron Chef (the one with the cheesey english voiceovers?) or the American Iron Chef? I totally dig the cheesey voiceover one. "Oh Samasan, did you see that? Amazing! Look! Oki is transforming the squid with CHOCOLATE FLAMBE! Very Impressive, and so unique!"

Oh wow Heidi, sounds like you've had a really accomplishing time. Reading what you write is always so helpful to me because I know I'm still processing things from L's birth. So need to get my med records from the hospital.

OH, and the heart thing - well apparently the enitre time I was in labor I was stuck in fast beats, so who knows. But the cardiologist who saw me (he's the cardio for the Cleveland Browns, feh!) totally missed it. Who knows. I want his records too. Actually I need to go on a records hunt and get everything. I have all my records from college here somewhere, but nothing else.

Signing - I think Lauren is signing milk back at me, so I'm reinforcing it by popping her right on the booob when she does. We've been only doing milk, potty, mom, dad, so far. I need to really expand what I sign, because I know all the words, I just forget to sign them!

Jeni, on those days I snuggle Lauren down tight in bed and hang on. She hates it and fights and I feel awful for doing it, but she eventually gives up and goes to sleep and sleeps really well. For whatever reason, if I pull her in against my body and hold her head down with my chin and her arms out in front of her and hands together (and sometimes I need a leg to keep her hips or legs down too) she just needs that feedback to calm. Kind of a modified swaddle or something.

Can you go swimming? That always wipes out L. NOt the tub, but a real pool, with lots of splashing and motorboating through the water. And water is soothing to me, I feel so much better after that.

Aww Jeni, *hugs* again. I feel ya! Can you get her up on your back and walk with her there? I know going out seems to throw her off, but how about going somewhere that is the same (like the forest, only lots of trees there) and walking and walking until she falls asleep? I wish I had another answer. I wish I had any answer. Put her in a sleeper and put the fan on, she'll stay warm enough. Or the radio on static.

Did I mention we might be moving to Chicago? I forget if I posted that before or not.
post #464 of 535
Jeni. I think the other mamas gave you some good advice so I don't need to repeat anything. I hope I'm not overstepping my bounds by saying that I don't think the problem is the fact that Bea isn't sleeping (though I'm sure that's making things worse), but your ppd. I know you've said you have it, and I really think it needs to be taken seriously. it's a big thing.... not some little funk mamas get in. at the very least maybe you could try some st john's wort?
and on sleep.... an overtired baby- yuck. btdt. I find that what works the best with Luka (cuz they are all so different) is that I just look at the clock and put him to sleep when 2+ hours have passed. works almost every time. he doesn't nurse that much in between that. we go in the bedroom and close the door and lie down. he's taking 3 naps a day like that.
mama. I hope today is better than yesterday.

Kathy- re:teething tabs and other homeopathics. in theory, all you need is one tab, because with homeopathics it's all about the essence getting into your body. I love homeopathics. they're safe and oh so effective when you have the right remedy.
yes- we're 6 hours behind the e. coast right now (no daylight savings here, so it goes to 5 hours after you change clocks). it is a pain to talk to people by phone on the e coast too! and I am so NOT a snoozy suzie- today Luka woke us up at 5:45 :

I had a dream that I was walking alone in SF and this group of people grabbed me. this woman had a hold of me and I dunno what they were gonna do to me. so I used some psychic powers and surrounded myself with white light and they left me alone woo hoo!

everyone is asleep and I REALLY had to go to the bathrrom. I didn't want to have to monitor Luka so I put him in the vibrating rocker chair. he's so big in it that he's looking over the arching bar that the toys hang off of. maybe i need to get rid of it?? he thought the vibrator was cool.....
post #465 of 535
Jeni
Quote:
PENNSYLVANIA
Co-Coordinator: Jackie Kelleher --- Contact: PO Box 4201, Elwyn, PA 19063 USA. Phone: 610 892 5051. Email: jackie@idoula.com
that is from the postpartum support international

online ppd support group
the reccomend calling 1-800-suicide if you need someone to talk to


yahoo groups

postpartum stress center this is in Rosemont PA

Jeni, please get your self some help. If you don't already have a dr that you trust find a new one. Call your local hospital most hospitals with a maternity ward have a postpartum support group. You don't have to take the dr's advise on baby raising if you don't want to, but you do needto find someone who will listen to you.
On the sleep thing, you need your sleep. You will not be able to care for Bea properly if you are not getting sleep. Try getting into bed and nursing her there. Put your bed on the floor with on side against the wall and put Bea between you and the wall and sleep. This way even if you fall asleep and she doesn't she's probably not going to roll off the bed. Is dh co-sleeping with you. If so have him sleep on the couch or the floor in the other room for a couple of nights. Sometimes that helps when Miss E will not sleep. I know he has some sort of hip or back problem and that's prob notthe best place for him to sleep but if he will not step up tothe plate and help, which it doesn't not sound liek he is, then too bad for him. You NEED to sleep and you NEED help and it doesn't sound as if he is providing those things so he should just (and I don't know a better way to put this) but get out of the way.
Miss Bea needs sleep also and your going to have to help her get there. She's prob going to protest and fight it. I've found that the longer babies go without sleep the harder it is to get them to sleep. If that means you have to lay in bed with her, do it. Forget about the household chores. DH can take care of that, and if he cannot he needs to ask/beg/pay someone else to do it. You should not be "taking care" of him in addition to yourself and Bea.
Here's my desperate sleep move. I'll nurse Miss E across my lap until she's asleep or just about asleep. You'll know becuase she'll be fairly limp. Sometimes she only wants to nurse for a couple of minutes but I know she's tired. I'll sit her up, she'll squirm then I'll lay her back down. Surf the web while doing this (no typing though) or watch tv. Sometimes it takes an hour sometimes it takes 10minutes, sometimes it even takes more than an hour. You just have to keep at it. Then when she's really relaxed and limp, I put her in the swing. She usually wakes up and screams at me now, she's pissed she was asleep and I mived her which woke her up, but I know that she would not stay sleeping very long on my lap. Ok so she's in the swing but angry. I walk away, go to the bathroom, switch the laundry do something that takes just a couple of minutes, you know what she's out. Sleeping baby. She usually crys for less than 30 seconds, and then fusses for maybe a minute after that. But I have to walk away, if she can see me or sense me in the room or hovering in the doorway it will not work.
I also agree with Joyce (i think) saying don't let her play. If she's tired you want things as low stimulation as possible. Will dh cuddle up with her? My dh has gotten Miss E to sleep quite a few times by just cuddling up with her in bed, when I've just had enough. We only use the bed for sleeping. Miss E is very rarely in bed for anything but a sleep so I think that helps dh for the cuddling down. I'm sure you already know this but if you are not calm Bea will pick up on that and she will feed off your neg energy and have trouble relaxing.
Oh on using a fan for wite noise, you can do that even when its cold, just point the fan away from her. DS's dad has to sleep with a fan on we would just point it away from us in the winter or throw extra blankets on
post #466 of 535
Jeni . You need some sleep, and you need to get some help. I'm really really, worried about you and Bea. We all have days when we are annoyed with our kids, but when you repeatedly think your 6mo is out to get you, its starting to get serious...maybe we aren't getting the whole picture, but from what you are posting here, we are seeing a mama who is basically at her wit's end with her sweet baby - and we're all scared for you guysl! We care about you both, and we really want to help you. Do you have health insurance? Call the hospital maternity ward, and tell them you have ppd. Ask them if there is a support group in your area. They will put you in touch with somebody who can help. If there are any midwives in your area, they can also help. Homeopathically, pulsatilla 30c might help too - but you also need someone to talk to, and if you don't feel like calling, if you feel like its too big a pita - tell me- and I will call for you!! I and others have offered to help you out. Take us up on that offer

I hope that you don't find me too blunt. That's an issue I sometimes have But seriously, this is not something that will just go away....
post #467 of 535
And yes to what Karen said about the problem not being Bea's lack of sleep but your ppd. That is something very serious and not to be taken lightly. It will keep getting worse. Things that make it worse are lack of sleep; not having enough support; relationshipp issues; and being isolated (or just feeling that way) and those are all things you have going on there. I know I've said it a bunch of times but you really do need to get some professional help. The dr "crunchy factor" isn't whats going to help you get better. the fact the he (or she) listens is what will.

Will Bea take a bottle? If you're feeling that bad about breastfeeding, it might not be that bad for her to get a bottle (ebm, formula, whatever) once or so a day. I know you want to bf exclusivly but tbh if it was choice between bm and reducing a major stressor when battling ppd I would give up the exclusive breastfeeding. I have suffered from depresson and panic disorders for a very very long time and nothing has even been worse than my bought with ppd after Christopher was born, and I have been inpatient and I was in a day program for 3 months I was so depressed at on point. But the differnce between then and when I had ppd, is that when I had pps I didn't get anyhelp. I tried to pretend it would go away. I had all kinds of excuses as to why I couldn't get help. I also had a bf that couldn't help alot (and from what you've shared he was way more helpfully than your dh). PPD is one of the worst things a woman can get. Takign care of a baby is hard enough.
post #468 of 535
Oh Karen I got my mail today Mr C is all excited. Thank you very much
post #469 of 535
I'm behind. I've read to post 410.

Andy - yes, I'll send you the extra back strap. You'll get whichever color I can find when I make up the package.

Karen - your dad sounds like he's doing so well! He is making a lot of progress really fast. He'll work at it and do his physical therapy, right? He'll love the visit from you.

Andy - the Bush Baby Premier Baby Carrier - where does the baby go?

Nana left for her other home last night. I have the baby today. She's on my back in the ergo again, finally asleep.

This morning Evelyn and I went to the art museum. I've been craving the art museum. I looked at paintings and she looked at people. I carried her in the Maya, and I'm sooo glad; the place is not stroller-friendly, although there were plenty of strollers there. I bought postcards! They don't have the arch on them like I hoped; you're all going to get samples of the St. Louis Art Museum's permanent collection.

Sorry about the rough night Andy (two nights ago now). Ours was less than optimal last night. At 2:30 she kicked my belly incessantly, and then stayed awake for over an hour, wide awake and happy for the most part. It took two munches to get her to sleep. She also had a HUGE poop. That's probably what woke her. Yes, the bedside BBLP is essential.

I hope I'll get a chance to catch up tonight. You are all so interesting!
post #470 of 535
Just a couple of quick replies:

No, I don't think she's out to get me. I just think that she would rather play than sleep. I don't think that's an unreasonable thing to think about a baby.

I don't have any insurance, and the maternity dept has already threatened to call CPS on me once, I really don't need that. I could afford maybe 2 or 3 shrink sessions if we don't go to Pennsic and spend what we have saved for that. Not going to Pennsic will make my life exponentially worse. I live for Pennsic. I look forward to it all year, from the day I get home. Not a sacrifice that I'm willing to make.

I already emailed that one lady, and she never answered me. She's in SE PA anyway. So is that center. If there were any midwives in my area, I probably wouldn't have ended up with this problem to begin with. I'm not suicidal, I'm not dangerous or whatever. My worst outlet is screaming, and on rare occasions throwing things at Mike. I'm not going to tie up a suicide hotline when there are actual suicidal people out there who need to be able to get through to someone. And look what happened to Tummy when her ex claimed she was suicidal, with no evidence of any sort against her. She still hasn't gotten her kids back.

I'm going to have to throw out or freecycle a ton of stuff, including most of my fabric stash and my grandmother's antique dressing table, to get the bed on the floor and against the wall. It's really hard to even think about doing that. I would much rather throw out the couch and get a futon and sleep in the living room.

Gah. Unexpected company. Back later.
post #471 of 535
I don't really know what to say, Jeni...You seem like you are searching for help, compassion, and answers, but whenever somebody has an idea or advice, you are ready with an answer as to why that won't work for you.

I didn't literally mean that you thought Bea was out to get you. But you have repeatedly posted here that you thought she hated you, and that you think she does the things she does on purpose.

If things are already escalating to the point where you are screaming and throwing things at your dh, even occasionally -good grief, its gotten bad enough, you don't want to wait until something worse happens. I can't even imagine what would be next. You don't want Bea to grow up with her mama in that headspace. I did, and it was awful. In the end, my grandparents ended up raising me. My mom didn't get the help she needed and ran away. I cannot tell you how painful it is to grow up like that.

I'm not sure why the maternity ward wanted to call CPS on you, but you could probably call anonymously, or one of us would even call for you. I;m sure there are free counseling classes in your area. I just don't believe it's possible that there is absolutely nothing whatsoever available to you. You just have to be willing to utilize the resources that are out there - believe me, if a stressed out mama calls the suicide hotline, they are not going to turn you away. You have as much a right to be there as anyone else. And the ppd support int'l lady is just the coord. She will put you in touch with a group in your area.

On the bed. Why do you have to get rid of all your stuff? Just move it into the living room, while you arrange the bedspace, and then put it back in there. Or, like you said, just sleep in the living room. Lord knows, I;ve done that. We actually have a futon in the living room for that very reason.

I'm saying this all to you with the most love and light and blessings, Jeni. Please don't be offended. I've totally been there, and I know what its like. Sort of like being lost in a thick fog, and you are just wandering around, and everything just seems so vast -you can't see any way out, or any light to lead you there. But once you do get out, you will see that it was only a short walk to the other side...As we have all said, we are here for you. And we just want to see you and Bea healthy and happy.

:
post #472 of 535
Jeni, I don't know why I thought you were in Colorado
Where in WPa are you? Maybe I can drive over and visit for a day and just give you guys a break? Not like I'm doing anything else right now.

OR I can come pick you and Bea up and you can stay with my parents (and me) while my dh is gone.. they love babies and company.
post #473 of 535
The NAMI Pennsylvania Scranton Area Chapter conducts regular support meetings for both consumers and family members on the first Tuesday of the month at 7 P.M. at:

The Scranton Counseling Center
326 Adams Avenue
Scranton, PA 18503

---

Drop in centers

CSP (570) 342-7762 LACKAWANNA 846 JEFFERSON ST PO BOX 1368 SCRANTON, PA 18510

CST (570) 342-7762 LACKAWANNA ATTN: KATIE CONNOLLY-NOVACK 846 JEFFERSON AVE SCRANTON, PA 18510

SCRANTON COUNSELING CENTER 570-348-6100 LACKAWANNA 326 ADAMS AVE SCRANTON, PA 18503

THE DOORWAY (717) 343-3031 LACKAWANNA 310 ADAMS AVE REAR SCRANTON, PA 18503
post #474 of 535
Quote:
Originally Posted by 3_opihi
I don't really know what to say, Jeni...You seem like you are searching for help, compassion, and answers, but whenever somebody has an idea or advice, you are ready with an answer as to why that won't work for you.
Well, I am mostly looking for people to talk to. I don't expect anyone to solve my problems.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 3_opihi
I'm not sure why the maternity ward wanted to call CPS on you.
Crazy freebirther. This is the land of the court-ordered c-section, after all. Plus I declined hep b, vit k, and eyedrops. I tried to delay the PKU too but the doc lied to me and I didn't have the articles on me to back me up.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 3_opihi
On the bed. Why do you have to get rid of all your stuff? Just move it into the living room, while you arrange the bedspace, and then put it back in there.
Well there wouldn't be any space to move it back to. It's a 10x10 room. And more than half of the wall is taken up by heaters at the bottom.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 3_opihi
Or, like you said, just sleep in the living room.
Yes, that seem to be the best option. It's still quite cluttered in here but there's more space to work with.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 3_opihi
I'm saying this all to you with the most love and light and blessings, Jeni. Please don't be offended.
I understand. It just seems like things are getting blown out of proportion. Believe me, this is nothing compared to what my life was like 2 years or more ago.


I will try calling those numbers on Monday and see if they have anything for PPD. SCC are the ones that put Mike on some weird new drug that completely knocked out his sexual function and made him suicidal lo these many years ago. Freaky stuff.
post #475 of 535
NAMI is a good place to start. I didn't think of them Lisa. Also if you do call the mat ward (which I reccomend) you don't have to give them any of your information, just tell them you are a new mama and you think you have ppd and do they have any or know of any support groups locally. Its very simple. Oh have your dh call. I have a fear of talking to people on the phone I have had panic attacks over it. My dh has made all kinds of phone calls like that for me, "I think my wife has ppd, do you have any support groups" Very simple.
I know its hard to make the first step and there's so many reasons as to why you can't get help but you need to. If not for you, for Bea.

Adult Basic PA health insurance
Quote:
Eligibility Requirements
Number in Family Maximum Income*

1 $19,140

2 $25,660

3 $32,180

4 $38,700

5 $45,220
Health care information from PA dept of public welfare

if you really cannot afford to see a dr they might be able to help
post #476 of 535
Hey Jeni, my friend in Scranton is going to call around for you tomorrow if that's ok. She has a babe 9 months old and was preemie, so she knows where to look for support.

I'm TIE DYEING MY KITCHEN! Yes, seriously. My friend was over and we dyed her dipes (all her meos and some flats) and now I'm just running all over the house looking for things to toss in my buckets before the dye runs out. I've dyed nursing bras, Lauren's undershirts, and a few pjs.

Maybe I should give my kitchen towels a facelift. :LOL
post #477 of 535
You're a brave mama Lisa to tie dye in your kitchen.... give you a couple of years and a toddler and you'd think otherwise.... though my friend and I did dye our silks in the kitchen.....

I'm having a super sit around day. i'm all itchy flared up again dh had some of his interns drive up to work with him here today and I was still in my pjs at 1pm. how embarassing.
post #478 of 535
Thread Starter 
Hi mamas! I don't want to make things 'worse' so here's my take fwiw

Jeni - I work for a suicide hotline. There are a lot of people who call who are lonely, sad, alone, scared, frustrated, angry, depressed, psychofrenic (I spelled that correctly), have all kinds of disorders, etc. We have maybe one emergency every quarter (that's less than one a MONTH). We get on average 10 calls a night (5pm - 5am). Do you get this? You can call ANY suicide line and just talk. If they start to try to solve your problems, then tell them you just want to talk. You are looking for listening, not problem solving. If you want that from us MDC mamas, I hear you. But our main concern is that you not do anything to hurt baby Bea or yourself. If you EVER feel you would, please promise that you would walk away - even if you have to leave Bea crying alone in your apt. (somewhere contained, like a crib or something) to go get a neighbor or call someone from a payphone. Would you recognize when that point had come? My guess is that you do/would, but you have come close and not gotten help, and that's what has set off the worry buttons. Be flattered...

Ok, that said, I'd also like to say that I think you are extremely capable and amazing. You have coped for 6 months on a shoestring budget, living in less than ideal conditions, dealing almost singlehandedly with a baby, AND dealing with your PPD and other mental/emotional issues (like the birthing). AMAZING MAMA!!! Think about it! So please feel the accomplishment that this half year has brought you! You aren't perfect, I'm not perfect (just ask my daughter who left this lovely note at the bottom of the driveway tonight "Der mom I hate you Im runing away for good sind Rebecca" Lovely, eh :LOL She ran her bike into the dog so I told her to go shelve the bike in the garage. Needless to say she's tucked away in bed now...). Well, so none of us are perfect. Our kids are wonky, we are wonky, our parents are wonky. Very few people have it easy that way (aaaaah, but we all know those golden people, don't we!). So take some time outs for yourself. If you have to put her in the pack and play or whatever, just do it. She's going to live through that trauma just fine (seriously! We were all (except Lisa) shunted into the playpen from time to time...I think my mother made me live in it for a couple of years because my brother was homicidal) and no matter how weird and nutty we are, we survived).

We all love you loads, for a woman we've never met Not all of us are trained or have experience with 'just listening' and some of your words are dark and frighten us. I think they do show that you have feelings that need to be 'aired' and validated, and that someone professional can evaluate them with you to determine whether there is anything more that they could do to help you. Not solve your problems ('cause they are YOURS to own), but help you to be strong enough to confront the demons. KWIM?

I think if going to the event you want to go to is healing for you, then we probably all agree that healing is in order for you. BUT I'm hearing a lot of support for you to get counseling, which it seems is what you are resistant to right now. Are you waiting for a super counselor? 'Cause I am, and it's been SEVEN FREAKING YEARS since my ppd. Still waiting. The toll that this has taken on my marriage is unbelievable. It's pretty remarkable that he's still here at all - testament to his own stuborn self (LOL). I'm not taking it lightly, I did a TON of healing (physical, mental, spiritual, emotional) and did see several counselors about it. I am hearing that you feel some level of control still, and that you are not going to do anything harmful to yourself or Bea. mama. We've all had a bad day or two...you've had like 200! In a ROW!! So find some quiet space and start to journal it out. She'll be fine. She's an awesome kid, you're doing a great job. You can even relax a little. She'll feel it and repond. I hope your company didn't stay TOO long tonight!

I GOT POSTCARDS!!! I got postcards of manatees, of a rainbow and a cactus, of a bunch of freaks throwing toilet paper at each other :LOL This is so fun!!! Thanks mamas! Beca also liked the boats from Az and Christopher, whom she now knows like her long lost best friend

Thanks Jessi! That's awesome...REALLY

Jess - you're invisible today

Lisa - how do you manage to cope with the food issues on the road??? I find it challenging and hard even when we're just out for one day! Ug. Today was a bad day for Beca and I. I got my period today, and was kind of tetchy. I went for a huge long walk this morning that felt AWESOME, Beca on her bike, the dog, me, the stroller (dh out of town again). At the end of the walk, once we were back on familiar ground, Beca just took off home, crossing a majorly busy street on her bike without me even around to see her. I was pretty darned pissed. I kept my cool and told her she's back to only being allowed to ride around the block. WHY WHY WHY do I resort to PUNISHMENT??? I think I feel like she just doesn't understand the REAL consequences of her actions, like that cars peel down that road going 40 - 50mph and her little shiney silver bike with the tinsel pipe cleaners in the spokes is just NOT going to save her butt. Neither is the 30$ helmet. AAAAARG. (so we had 2 bike incidences which is why I told her to shelve the thing). The rest of the day was ok until the blow out at the end of the day (after she'd eaten the yummy rice flour cookies we made after swim today). She was really tired and already kinda waffly about the bike thing. She insists on riding it because she says she gets tired walking around the block. Now I don't walk that fast, I give the dog loads of time to sniff every blade of grass and tree trunk in the neighborhood. Whatever. No more bike Maybe I'll go get one of those kiddie tandem bikes...

Hrmmm - what else. Pretty quiet already. Maybe people are leaving early for long weekends? Ok, off to clean up the kitchen and send some Reiki to Heidi and Karen's Dad (one then the other). I love doing it because I always feel quite recharged afterwards! Heidi - I'm going to send you physical, let me know if you'd rather have spiritual/emotional next time.

Caio mamas! You are all so caring and awesome!!! Oh, a quick joke that beca told me today (in one of her better moments)

Knock knock
who's there
Beca
Beca who?
Because I love you (biiiiig smooch) :LOL

Oh yeah - lots ot say in response to Heidi's post - I'll try to do that in about an hour, if I'm not asleep
post #479 of 535
Jeni: I can't thinkof anything to say that hasn't been said other than please don't feel attacked and stop posting mama. At least by posting here, you are venting some of your emotions. I'm worried for you too. Get whatever help you can.

Had to go down and sign up for WIC today. DH's cut in hours is nice on the tired Mama, but really tough on the pocketbook. We have to cash out retirement savings to get through the next couple of months (dh used to be a teacher, so had a seperate account though that that doesn't affect his PO money). Then DH goes back on the OT list, but we will be back to never seeing him. I need a soak in the hot springs so badly, but that will likely have to wait for my birthday money in November.

Kaia's weight is holding steady. (sigh) We're going to try adding some solids instead of formula, and see what happens. If she were losing, we'd go back to formula. Just tell me this litle experiment hasn't hurt her! Oatmeal and prune juice tonight. Pears, oats and prunes tomorrow morning. Dr. said I can feed anything but citrus, egg and chocolate. Yeah right. Organic fruits, yams and avocados. Then we'll see. Good news is Kaia is growing well, hitting developmental milestones and seems in perfect health. Such a precious little girl.

Annie, I'm afraid we neutered that box of chocolate and dropped it in the mail at 12 ounces. Enjoy! Still working on a decent amount of homespun for you. I may get out the wheel and see if I can get more done on it. Wearing my baby at the spinning wheel... rhythmic rocking and sounds, she might just love it.
post #480 of 535
Karen, we are brave - mental picture for y'all. My kitchen is all torn up, down to bare walls and floor, so mess is not an issue. BUT there are 3 big boxes of new computer crap that dh ordered, my suitcase, and groceries that need put away on the floor. We dyed in there, my friend is 38 weeks preg, she has her 20 month old w/her, and Lauren and Zoe are awake. Her babe wanted to play in the "water" while my babe did some major fussing. We got a ton of stuff dyed before she left, and then I put Lauren to bed and literally ran around the house looking for things to dye :LOL


ROFL Andy, I did get put in a playpen, but not very often. Only usually when sleeping or if I was actually playing. And I just have to add THAT I LOVE MY PARENTS. Mom made me soup last night after I put Lauren to bed when she found me raiding her pantry looking for junk food. Dad came over today and mowed the lawn for Ryan and helped with some of the kitchen construction (we're ready for Ryan to do plumbing now) and held the baby while I showered and ate.

Hey, I think this is a great reference on solids for babies. http://www.waba.org.my/wbw/wbw05/ima...n_f_eng_p3.jpg

Andy, food on the road is a LOT easier for me than you - the whole wheat thing, ya know? Depending on where I am, I ask for details (like eating out) and I did a lot of research on food allergy boards for "safe" meals in different chains (I have a meal at Panera, McD's, Boston Market, etc. that I can get in a pinch, and everyone likes Panera!) and my hosts this week were really generous in asking me for food ideas (they are dairy free) and letting me read labels and we all went to the grocery together and I grabbed a few things I love (cereal, salad dressing, etc) and I eat TONS of salad and fruit.

Hey send me some physical, eh? My heart goes pitter patter in a not so fun way today. And I'm dehydrated, so I'm sure that's adding to the fun.

Michelle, holding steady is great. My friend's little guy didn't gain a single ounce for 2 months (he's just about a year now) and doing fine. Use your gut instead of the dr.'s.

OK, waiting on dh's airplane. I have to wake up Lauren to go get him, he refuses to take a cab home. Since I'd be awake either way, not a biggie, but man, it'd be nice to have him take a normal time flight or something. He leaves on Sun. at 3 and will be gone until next Fri at dinner, so the hours are a little better, instead of this late Fri. night flight.

Nada else to chat about. My house is utter chaos right now, beyond the normal chaos. Going to spend a good amout of time tomorrow after the baby shower getting things put back to normal. Or at least as normal as you can get w/o a kitchen.

G'nite
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