She arrived on her due date! July 26th at 6:42 AM after 6 hours of labor and 10 min. of pushing. I did it all naturally! I cant believe it!
But now things are not going so well. Baby looked great when she was born - apgars were 8/9 and she nursed right away and for a long time. They came to give her a bath and saw that she was breathing very fast which is a sign of infection or fluid in the lungs. So she went to the newborn nursery (we are in a small, low tech hospital so there is no NICU here) for observation. They did a blood test and her white blood cell count was very low and her breathing (which should be about 30-50 times a min.) was 120 times a min.
So now she is on antibiotics for at least three days. We are waiting for the blood culture to come back to see what kind of infection it is. If its a minor one all she needs is the 3 days, if its more serious (like pnumonia) she will need 7-10 days.
She had a chest x-ray the yesterday which was very bad - lungs almost all white which means lots of fluid. They did another today which looks much, much better, almost normal so that is great news. But her breathing is still around 88-92.
Because of the fast breathing she cant eat by mouth at all because she could asperate it so she is getting fluids through IV. She also has to be in a little oxygen tent.
Things have been pretty tough for me - its so hard to see her hooked up to all the machines and not be able to hold or nurse her. She is doing better today but the progress is slow. She wants to nurse so badly - she just roots around and cries. The pacifier only helps for a min. then she spits it out.
I was able to nurse her for an hour or so right after birth - before she started having trouble - which is good and bad. Good because she knows how to do it now so hopefully wont have any trouble when we can start again and also good that she got some colostrum before the antibiotics but bad because now she knows what she is missing and is miserable.
They are hoping tomorrow to wean her off the oxygen and if her breathing is ok after that I can feed her. I have been pumping every three hours around the clock so my milk will come in so I am pretty exhausted - not much time for uninterupted sleep and when I can fall asleep I dont sleep well, waking a lot wanting to go see her.
Tonight has been the roughest for me so far - I went in to the nursery to take milk and see her and she was screaming - just not happy and nothing calmed her down until I asked the nurse to swaddle her. After that she fell asleep. It was so hard to see her like that and not be able to comfort her (my instinct was to pick her up and nurse her) that I just bawled when I got back to my room and have not been able to stop crying since - off and on.
I went back a little later after the nursing shift change and I really like the nurse who is on tonight. He had her little bed remade with support all around her and had her swaddled up tightly - she was sound asleep. He told me if I wanted to come back at midnight he would be doing her assesments and would let me change her and hold her for a while. I have only been able to hold her twice since she has been in the nursery.
Labor was something else! I am still sort of in shock that I did it all naturally. I handled it pretty well until transition, that is the most unbeliveable pain but by then its too late to do anything about it so you just have to get through it. Luckily labor was only 6 hours and only 1 hour of the part that was unbearable. I pushed through 3 contractions - about 10 min. and she was out. They think that is why she is having the breathing trouble - she came out so fast she took in a lot of fluid on the way out.
My doula was soooo awsome - I couldnt have done it without her, she really kept me focused. And the tub - well laboring in water is just the best thing ever!
Unfortunately DH didnt make it in time - he got here about 2 hours after she was born. I am sad he missed the actual birth but I think it might be better that he wasnt here for the labor - he wouldnt have known what to do and I think the intensity of it all might have been too much for him - just hard for him to see me in so much pain.
Anyway - sorry this got so long. I never thought anything like this would happen. Just planned on having a healthy baby and going home like I did with Max. She is just so precious and small (good sized baby but still seems so tiny). Luckily I can stay here with her for now - once I am discharged tomorrow night they have a nesting room where I can stay. Hopefully I wont have to go home without her.
I am going to work on the actual birth story soon.
But now things are not going so well. Baby looked great when she was born - apgars were 8/9 and she nursed right away and for a long time. They came to give her a bath and saw that she was breathing very fast which is a sign of infection or fluid in the lungs. So she went to the newborn nursery (we are in a small, low tech hospital so there is no NICU here) for observation. They did a blood test and her white blood cell count was very low and her breathing (which should be about 30-50 times a min.) was 120 times a min.
So now she is on antibiotics for at least three days. We are waiting for the blood culture to come back to see what kind of infection it is. If its a minor one all she needs is the 3 days, if its more serious (like pnumonia) she will need 7-10 days.
She had a chest x-ray the yesterday which was very bad - lungs almost all white which means lots of fluid. They did another today which looks much, much better, almost normal so that is great news. But her breathing is still around 88-92.
Because of the fast breathing she cant eat by mouth at all because she could asperate it so she is getting fluids through IV. She also has to be in a little oxygen tent.
Things have been pretty tough for me - its so hard to see her hooked up to all the machines and not be able to hold or nurse her. She is doing better today but the progress is slow. She wants to nurse so badly - she just roots around and cries. The pacifier only helps for a min. then she spits it out.
I was able to nurse her for an hour or so right after birth - before she started having trouble - which is good and bad. Good because she knows how to do it now so hopefully wont have any trouble when we can start again and also good that she got some colostrum before the antibiotics but bad because now she knows what she is missing and is miserable.
They are hoping tomorrow to wean her off the oxygen and if her breathing is ok after that I can feed her. I have been pumping every three hours around the clock so my milk will come in so I am pretty exhausted - not much time for uninterupted sleep and when I can fall asleep I dont sleep well, waking a lot wanting to go see her.
Tonight has been the roughest for me so far - I went in to the nursery to take milk and see her and she was screaming - just not happy and nothing calmed her down until I asked the nurse to swaddle her. After that she fell asleep. It was so hard to see her like that and not be able to comfort her (my instinct was to pick her up and nurse her) that I just bawled when I got back to my room and have not been able to stop crying since - off and on.
I went back a little later after the nursing shift change and I really like the nurse who is on tonight. He had her little bed remade with support all around her and had her swaddled up tightly - she was sound asleep. He told me if I wanted to come back at midnight he would be doing her assesments and would let me change her and hold her for a while. I have only been able to hold her twice since she has been in the nursery.
Labor was something else! I am still sort of in shock that I did it all naturally. I handled it pretty well until transition, that is the most unbeliveable pain but by then its too late to do anything about it so you just have to get through it. Luckily labor was only 6 hours and only 1 hour of the part that was unbearable. I pushed through 3 contractions - about 10 min. and she was out. They think that is why she is having the breathing trouble - she came out so fast she took in a lot of fluid on the way out.
My doula was soooo awsome - I couldnt have done it without her, she really kept me focused. And the tub - well laboring in water is just the best thing ever!
Unfortunately DH didnt make it in time - he got here about 2 hours after she was born. I am sad he missed the actual birth but I think it might be better that he wasnt here for the labor - he wouldnt have known what to do and I think the intensity of it all might have been too much for him - just hard for him to see me in so much pain.
Anyway - sorry this got so long. I never thought anything like this would happen. Just planned on having a healthy baby and going home like I did with Max. She is just so precious and small (good sized baby but still seems so tiny). Luckily I can stay here with her for now - once I am discharged tomorrow night they have a nesting room where I can stay. Hopefully I wont have to go home without her.
I am going to work on the actual birth story soon.
I'm sorry she's sick though. 
