I'm feeling a little desperate for help.
My five and a half year old daughter has, over the last 18 months, developed a real phobia of public toilets. It started with a toilet at a store overflowing on us - it was the only one available and someone had put too much paper in it. After that incident she was insistent that we only use the big toilets.
This was okay, if a little inconvenient. A couple of times we'd encounter one that was out of order, and rather than use a smaller stall would have to hunt down another bathroom with a large stall.
Then she developed a fear of toilets with the automatic sensor. It is at the point where she completely panics and will NOT use one with the sensor. We have to leave the door wide open while she goes. A couple of times I've been sucessful with getting her to go after covering the sensor with toilet paper so it can't "see" us, but only after extensive cajoling and begging and a lot of crying on her end.
Today she absolutely panicked and completely lost her temper. Other than the toilet thing, this is just not her. She's always been able to express herself very well. Has had maybe five tantrums ever. She's very sweet, we have a good relationship. We un-school and I know all about following her lead, waiting for her to be ready or show interest in something. We have made every effort not to pressure her or make light of her fears. I kind of thought that, with patience, this would go away. I've tried very hard to not make a big deal about it and address her fears, but it just seems to be getting worse.
Does anyone have any experience or words of advice? Avoiding public toilets isn't going to work. We primarily use public transportation, so often we're out of the house just long enough that peeing before we leave the house doesn't work. And since she doesn't go to school, we are often out at different classes, meetings, etc. Short of becoming housebound, I'm at a loss.
My five and a half year old daughter has, over the last 18 months, developed a real phobia of public toilets. It started with a toilet at a store overflowing on us - it was the only one available and someone had put too much paper in it. After that incident she was insistent that we only use the big toilets.
This was okay, if a little inconvenient. A couple of times we'd encounter one that was out of order, and rather than use a smaller stall would have to hunt down another bathroom with a large stall.
Then she developed a fear of toilets with the automatic sensor. It is at the point where she completely panics and will NOT use one with the sensor. We have to leave the door wide open while she goes. A couple of times I've been sucessful with getting her to go after covering the sensor with toilet paper so it can't "see" us, but only after extensive cajoling and begging and a lot of crying on her end.
Today she absolutely panicked and completely lost her temper. Other than the toilet thing, this is just not her. She's always been able to express herself very well. Has had maybe five tantrums ever. She's very sweet, we have a good relationship. We un-school and I know all about following her lead, waiting for her to be ready or show interest in something. We have made every effort not to pressure her or make light of her fears. I kind of thought that, with patience, this would go away. I've tried very hard to not make a big deal about it and address her fears, but it just seems to be getting worse.
Does anyone have any experience or words of advice? Avoiding public toilets isn't going to work. We primarily use public transportation, so often we're out of the house just long enough that peeing before we leave the house doesn't work. And since she doesn't go to school, we are often out at different classes, meetings, etc. Short of becoming housebound, I'm at a loss.
