Wallowing in self-pity over the slings and arrows of my children's outrageous fortune? Well, I don't know, maybe I do... but it certainly doesn't help that while the overwhemling majority of people (here at MDC and IRL) are fully aware and freely admit that a child with, say, cerebral palsy will have challenges to face and overcome, most people (again, online and IRL) don't understand that there *are* challenges associated with giftedness at all.
It's hard not to look like you're wallowing in self-pity when other people can't see that there's any struggle involved; that's my problem with the word "gifted." It implies a gift, which is inherently and wholly good. There's no negative association with the word, which makes it difficult for people to understand that there could be (is!!) a negative association with giftedness.
Oh-- and I specifially addressed the problems that I had with the other thread... I thought that I was pretty clear, but I could be wrong.
It's happened before, and it will happen again.
I will freely admit-- it takes me about a week to get to uploaded photos or scanned images online these days. I've got a crappy connection and an even crappier computer to use.
We are hoping to get a new one with our tax refund, but finances are unbearably tight right now. I won't go into any more details to avoid "wallowing." Anyway, I can't get to images right away. I also can't check my email more often than once a week (and it's usually every other week...
) at my ILs.
I'm not trying to ignore anyone, though. I am very open about the fact that I have frequent computer problems and no high speed connection, and on the other threads that I post to regularly people are very understanding...
I have to say, sometimes reading this thread I feel very privileged to have the children that I have. BeanBean especially is well adjusted and happy; he has no sensory issues to speak of, getting him to try new and different foods has never been a problem (BeanBean's diet is more varied than most people's, I'd wager!), he is socially adept and his physical development is on par with that of his age peers. He's inquisitive, open minded, and fun to talk with most of the time; he's got very interesting insights into the world, and I get a real kick out of him. He can be rambunctious at times, and even overwhelming for me in some ways, but overall, despite his high energy level, I'd say that he's rather easy to deal with most of the time. I've felt from the very beginning that I "lucked out" with him (in fact, I often felt that his extremely easy infancy was God's way of apologizing to me for the AGONY that was his pregnancy & birth). He's a great kid, and very easy to deal with. Reading over this thread and seeing some actual challenges, some of which I can relate to personally but very few of which apply to BeanBean just makes me more appreciative of how easy I have it in so many ways.
BooBah is an entirely different story-- it seems like every day she becomes more sensitive and more aware. While BeanBean will sleep if he's tired regardless of the surrounding environment (his only request is a blanket, but if he's tired enough he'll forego even that), BooBah is completely unable to sleep if the lights are on, there's too much noise, it's too warm, it's too cold, she's wearing too much clothing, she's got a blanket covering the wrong parts of her body, she doesn't have a good space, she's too far away from Mama/Daddy/BeanBean, she's too close to Mama/Daddy/BeanBean... I could go on and on like this. I can think of many people who wouldn't even notice such things, especially as first time parents, but with BeanBean around the differences are striking. She's a different child, and every day her differences (from her brother and her peers) are more apparent. So I'm glad that I stuck with this thread before she was born, and have seen other children go through these things and even grow out of some of them. I know that when it gets to the point where I'm losing my mind because I'm not doing the bedtime routine in the right order and things are making me crazy, there will be someone here who understands and can walk me through it all again...
CB-- I've been meaning to ask: how is Lou doing with her perfectionism issues? How are you guys coping these days?
FRM-- I count myself lucky that my older child is the more boisterous one.
Seriously, though, I don't think that he's setting himself up to be the class clown; he's simply asserting, once and for all, that he is a unique individual, and that he's a different person from his brother. The things that he's doing are very normal for his age; I don't think that they say anything about his future intellect, education, or anything like that. Because you're home educating, I think you've probably got less to worry about than most parents do, and I think that because your older son has such a different personality you may have slightly unrealistic expectations about the way that little boys generally behave. Your second little man reminds me a lot of BeanBean.
SunRayeMomi-- Yes, they're all from Bishojo Senshi SAILORMOON. I'm a *huge* SailorMoon otaku.
My goal in life is to one day own all five seasons of Bishojo Senshi Sailormoon on DVD; not the American translations (the early ones sucked, the later ones were better but they still skipped episodes, and the fifth season was never dubbed for American audiences at all and never will be
) but the original Japanese releases.
They will be mine, oh yes! They will be mine! Oshioki-yo!
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I dislike the word, "gifted", because it sets people off and it's not very descriptive of what it actually refers to. When people hear the word, "gifted", they think "gift" and then they think, "Hey, my child is a gift too." or "My child has gifts too.", both of which are true, of course. And then there are "gifted and talented programs", which sometimes are set up on achievement. Like, in my state, you just study and make a certain score on an achievement test and you get in. So, the "gifted" pull-out is something that competitive parents vie (sp?) for. So, I wish a new word could just be devised, because the old one is loaded and it's not very descriptive.
over what you said. Thank you.
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