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Addressing the Special Needs of Gifted Children, #6 - Page 36

post #701 of 776
I think that if you nailed them down on what you are supposed to do, they could very well offer the advice I once got. That advice was to hide my 1yo's books and try to encourage other types of play. Now, if you were to encourage reading, people would say you were pushing, right? But if you strongly encourage playing outside, no one will say you are pushy, even if you are really pushing outside play on a reluctant child.

I think that they would say you should try to force well-roundedness on the child and that if you do so, he/she will lose interest in books. When I did that (yeah, I admit I hid his books once when I was still overwhelmed and confused; I'd never do that again), he dug through the recycling bins and showed me the letters he found in there.

I mean, I like the idea of a well-rounded childhood. And I try to give my children chances to be well-rounded. I make sure they have a wide variety of toys and activities to chose from. I make sure they get lots of outside time. But if they naturally gravitate to something repeatedly, I would never discourage it.

I think you'd have to make a case that your child is independently choosing these activities, even in the presence of a well-rounded environment. And that at that point, I think "they" wouldn't have anything else to say. I don't think they've thought it through very well.

I've felt kind of bad about some of these recent threads. It brought some old issues back up. And I feel badly that this is bothering some of us, that "they" won't conceed what is really going on. But I don't care about what they think we should do. They don't know my kids and their issues (specifically ds1). And I feel relieved that my kids have a mother who won't put blinders on wrt giftedness. To be blunt, they're wrong and I no longer care what they think.
post #702 of 776
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by LeftField
I think that if you nailed them down on what you are supposed to do, they could very well offer the advice I once got. That advice was to hide my 1yo's books and try to encourage other types of play. Now, if you were to encourage reading, people would say you were pushing, right? But if you strongly encourage playing outside, no one will say you are pushy, even if you are really pushing outside play on a reluctant child.
I agree with this.

I also think a lot of people are under the impression that we who use the word "gifted" are sitting there screening our kids from birth for possible signs of giftedness. In my experience that is not true for the majority of parents of gifted children. I didn't even think much about the word gifted until Hollis was almost 2. My friend was taking her son to a speech therapist and told the therapist about Hollis writing, sight reading, etc. The therapist said "He's gifted" and my friend told me what had been said. Still, I didn't think much about it at that time because I was just so busy keeping up with him. It wasn't until a couple years later that I began actively seeking out resources on giftedness. I think those of you who are doing that now will be in a much better position to understand what's going on with your kids.

Quote:
I think that they would say you should try to force well-roundedness on the child and that if you do so, he/she will lose interest in books. When I did that (yeah, I admit I hid his books once when I was still overwhelmed and confused; I'd never do that again), he dug through the recycling bins and showed me the letters he found in there.
Another thing "they" don't understand--our kids see what they want to see, everywhere we go. There are letters and colors and shapes everywhere. Same with cars and animals and clouds and stars and science and math and all the other zillions of things a gifted kid demands to know about. These things are everywhere! Taking our kids to the park for the day does not take away their giftedness and make them think and act in non-gifted ways and stop learning stuff they're not "supposed" to know. When I took Hollis to the park when he was little, other kids would run around without seeming to worry much about anything except for playing. Hollis would count the steps on the various parts of the play structure, ask what the street signs said, write letters and numbers in the sand, invent a game on the slide with elaborate rules, etc. He never played like other kids do. He is different and he is different because his mind WORKS differently. His giftedness is a HUGE part of who he is.

"They" don't get that. They seem to think we are somehow making our kids be this way. They think that aside from knowing a few things other kids don't, our kids are not any different from theirs and have no special needs. Therefore if we talk about those things our kids know, we are bragging, and if we try to talk about the challenges our kids present, we are whining. How dare we whine about a kid being smart. We should just feel "blessed" and shut up about it.

Quote:
I think you'd have to make a case that your child is independently choosing these activities, even in the presence of a well-rounded environment. And that at that point, I think "they" wouldn't have anything else to say. I don't think they've thought it through very well.
I don't think so either.
post #703 of 776
LeftField-- That's one of the saddest things that I've ever heard... they really said to hide his books?

Quote:
Originally Posted by lckrause
Taking our kids to the park for the day does not take away their giftedness and make them think and act in non-gifted ways and stop learning stuff they're not "supposed" to know. When I took Hollis to the park when he was little, other kids would run around without seeming to worry much about anything except for playing. Hollis would count the steps on the various parts of the play structure, ask what the street signs said, write letters and numbers in the sand, invent a game on the slide with elaborate rules, etc. He never played like other kids do. He is different and he is different because his mind WORKS differently. His giftedness is a HUGE part of who he is.
You know, it didn't really occur to me that other people might think that it's simply a matter of children who know more things than average children, that it has nothing to do with the way that the brain operates. That would explain, though, why so many people believe that drilling will make a child gifted, or starting early academic work, or parental pushing, or whatever. I think that if more people understood that there's a different underlying protocol for brain function and for absorbing information involved, they'd be less hesitant to recognize gifted children for what they are-- radically different from the average. I'll have to chew on this some more.

My mother used to punish me as a child by sending me outside without a book. Seriously! This was the only thing that my mother could do to me that would make me truly miserable (and boy did it ever ). It didn't make me reticent, though; it made me memorize all the streets in my town so that I could find my way to the library on my own. I started walking to the library by myself when I was nine. I also learned how to sneak books in all sorts of unlikely places, like knee socks, and found some places around the apartment building I lived in where I could hide books for several weeks at a time. Ah, back in the day every problem had a simple solution...
post #704 of 776
The key is: it's how the brain operates NOT how much information is stored there. The problem is: it's much harder to assess operations than it is to assess knowledge.

Has anyone seen: www.mindwareonline.com? I know some were mentioning they have a hard time finding "toys" or other such gifts for their dcs.

mv
post #705 of 776
It's very quiet here... I bet the Yahoo! Group is hopping. Please remember that I can't check my email at home, not until tax season rolls around and we get our real present-- a new computer! Yaaaaay...

So today, BeanBean asked me for "a book about poop. When I eat, the food goes into my stomach and then I burn off some calories and all the bad stuff comes out of this little hole here, see? This is my anus, and that's where the poop comes out. Can you get a book about poop at the library? Can you go right now?" I told him (truthfully) that the library was closed, and he said, "You'll just have to go as soon as it opens, then. Tomorrow!" BeanBean has obviously learned one of the most important lessons there is: if you're interested in it, there's probably a book about it and if you don't have that book, you should go to the library. I promised him that I would look for a book about poop (and then, at his insistence, I wrote the words down in my notebook full of books to borrow from the library, next to his name-- "Eli: A book about poop." ) and said that I would read a different book with him instead. He was happy, I wrote it down and that meant I was taking him seriously, so he brought me "the uterus book!" and we sat down to read that.

I know that fascination with bodily processes is very, very normal in children his age. I'm just amazed at the way that this particular interest manifests in BeanBean. Rather than just walking around saying "poopy" and "butt," he's remembered many discussions about what happens when you eat and asked for a library book about the process, so that he can see pictures of it. I think that's incredibly freaking cool. How upset can I be with a child talking about poop when he's so curious about how it got to *be* poop in the first place?

At the doctor's office, they always have the coolest, most colorful human anatomy charts. I know that they get them from pharmaceutical companies, and I know that they're free. What I want to know is, how can *I* get some of those charts? I saw the most amazing book of systems of the human body with beautiful, full color illustrations in English and Spanish. BeanBean would probably go *nuts* if we had one around the house, it would be just as popular as Ultimate Aircraft, but I've never seen one outside of a doctor's office, and when I asked they said that the reps bring them sometimes. Where can *I* find a pharmaceutical rep with a briefcase full of cool things like that?! I don't care if it says ZITHROMAX in big letters on the bottom of the front cover, with dosing information inside on the first beautiful, laminated page... I just want the book!
post #706 of 776
Quote:
Originally Posted by eilonwy
LeftField-- That's one of the saddest things that I've ever heard... they really said to hide his books?
Yes, well, I was the one who hid them. I can't believe I did that. He was somewhere around 18 months, didn't speak, and was obsessed with books, letters, numbers, shapes, the stuff we often talk about...I didn't know what was "wrong" with him. I knew that he was markedly different from peers in a group, didn't seem to like children his age (except to study them) and he was just so different. I felt really out of my league and I wasn't seeing any other kids who acted like him.

I posted somewhere about it, because I was kind of bewildered about it. IRL, people thought it was very strange. I told his pediatrician about it, but I don't think he believed me. He was going on and on about how we had to have him evaluated for his lack of speech and when I told him ds1 memorized the sounds in the alphabet (I was testing him to see if he could repeat sounds), he just kind of looked at me like, "yeah....right." Of course, ds1 was a non-performer and so he was unlikely to demonstrate what I was talking about (not that the ped asked).

I know I'm justifying a lot, but I just didn't know what I was dealing with. I was reading some Waldorf stuff and feeling very angry about their message, while being simultaneously confused. People seem to recommend, "You are your child's first teacher" and I hate that book! They say, "Oh, she says to follow your child's lead and be relaxed." That is only true if you have a physical child. If your child likes to read things, she's all over that as being wrong. She has a specific idea of what small kids are like and if you happen to have the one who isn't like that, the book is no longer reassuring and friendly. I took it as pretty pushy, actually.

Anyway, so I posted about it, because I guess I needed advice or support or, "Yeah, my kids do that." I got the advice to hide the books in the interest of making him forget about it and move on to more well-rounded things. As I said, it didn't work out that way. When he brought me some recycling materials to show me some letters, I realized how wrong I was being and I took the books back out. This is the kind of stuff that is pertinent to the many sentiments of "there's no value in labeling a toddler as gifted." Once I learned about giftedness and put all the pieces together, it went a LONG way in reassuring me about my child's development. It helped me understand my child a great deal. And it also allowed me to find the support I really needed, in the form of online gifted communities.

Sorry so long in replying. Both my kids are "reading" this right now, so I should go attend to them.
post #707 of 776
Quote:
Originally Posted by LeftField
I know I'm justifying a lot, but I just didn't know what I was dealing with. I was reading some Waldorf stuff and feeling very angry about their message, while being simultaneously confused. People seem to recommend, "You are your child's first teacher" and I hate that book! They say, "Oh, she says to follow your child's lead and be relaxed." That is only true if you have a physical child. If your child likes to read things, she's all over that as being wrong. She has a specific idea of what small kids are like and if you happen to have the one who isn't like that, the book is no longer reassuring and friendly. I took it as pretty pushy, actually.
Yeah, I read that book. I thought that it was pretty funny, actually. I recommend it all the time... to parents of perfectly average children. Everything in it's place, I say.

I've got to love the double standard-- that it's perfectly reasonable, even preferable to follow your child's lead if your child performs within limits E and Q, but if you do the same thing with a child outside of that range you're either neglecting them or you're pushing or you don't really know anything about your child and child development in general. People who've read books about average child development know all about gifted children, too; they know for a fact that it's absolutely impossible to have a child who, at 18 months, is obsessed with letters and the sounds that they make (after all, it's impossible for children to learn to read phonetically anyway) or one who says their first meaningful word when they're only a few weeks old, or who tries to lift their head and look around during their first hour out of the womb. We must be making it all up. My question is, why the heck would we do that? I enjoy being a freak, but I certainly don't enjoy being ostracized, and quite frankly that's what happens when you have a child who is very, very different. What kind of mother wants people staring at her baby like she's grown another head, or making snide remarks to her son in the grocery store because he can count to ten? Do they really think that we enjoy it, and get something positive out of it? Yeesh.

There are times when, given the choice, I would absolutely wave a magic wand that would set my kids' IQs in stone right around 127, just so I wouldn't have to deal with crap anymore. : Of course I love my children just the way that they are, quirks and all, but I wonder if life wouldn't be easier for them if they were more like their peers.

For the first time all week, BooBah did not wake me up by dropping a book on my head. Of course, it's only because her brother woke up first, but still... it's a nice change of pace, not to be pointing out letters and reading a book before I even get up to use the bathroom.
post #708 of 776
Quote:
Originally Posted by eilonwy
There are times when, given the choice, I would absolutely wave a magic wand that would set my kids' IQs in stone right around 127, just so I wouldn't have to deal with crap anymore. : Of course I love my children just the way that they are, quirks and all, but I wonder if life wouldn't be easier for them if they were more like their peers.
Well, according to the testing results I just received, ds's IQ (verbal, at least...performance even lower) is exactly that! Though I don't know that the results are perfectly accurate (he refused to answer some of the more personal questions that may have touched on emotional issues within him) I do know that I deal with plenty of crap, and he doesn't seem too much like his peers. Does that suggest that his test results were inaccurate, his behaviors and attitude are an aberration for someone with his IQ, or neither?
post #709 of 776
teachma, I wonder about that, too. Dd hasn't been tested yet, but I wonder what I will do with the info if it comes out that her IQ is above avg but not unusually high. Just me thinking here in relation to my dd, not yours-- is there something else 'wrong' with her? If it isn't high IQ, what else is causing her to be so different, to experience things so differently, to have such a hard time with life?

In regard to the crummy advice in books, I remember one of my friends giving me Baby Wise when dd#1 was a baby. Aside from having horrible, non-AP advice, I almost laughed at the start of the book. It begins with something like, 'all babies are the same.' Dd definitely was not the same and everyone kept telling me that I was doing something wrong b/c she screamed non-stop. Nothing like a book to tell you that, yes, there is nothing different about your child, you are the one doing something wrong that is making her this way!
post #710 of 776
Quote:
Originally Posted by teachma
Well, according to the testing results I just received, ds's IQ (verbal, at least...performance even lower) is exactly that! Though I don't know that the results are perfectly accurate (he refused to answer some of the more personal questions that may have touched on emotional issues within him) I do know that I deal with plenty of crap, and he doesn't seem too much like his peers. Does that suggest that his test results were inaccurate, his behaviors and attitude are an aberration for someone with his IQ, or neither?
It may very well... but it could just mean that I have no idea what 127 looks like vs. 97 or 157. I'm inclined to think that it's a little bit of both. If your son refused to answer questions which bothered him and the tester did not take into account his anxiety at even being asked such things, he probably "deserves" a higher score than he achieved. IQ tests are funny that way. It's very possible to get a falsely low score, there are many many contributing factors, but it's just about impossible to get a falsely high score. The tests are designed to give a lower score rather than a higher one every time. I'm very curious as to what your son's therapist thinks of the results (or am I thinking of the wrong kid? ).
post #711 of 776
Quote:
Originally Posted by eilonwy
It may very well... but it could just mean that I have no idea what 127 looks like vs. 97 or 157. I'm inclined to think that it's a little bit of both. If your son refused to answer questions which bothered him and the tester did not take into account his anxiety at even being asked such things, he probably "deserves" a higher score than he achieved. IQ tests are funny that way. It's very possible to get a falsely low score, there are many many contributing factors, but it's just about impossible to get a falsely high score. The tests are designed to give a lower score rather than a higher one every time. I'm very curious as to what your son's therapist thinks of the results (or am I thinking of the wrong kid? ).
Nope, that's my ds!

And, I am willing to accept that a lot of his unusual behavior can be attributed to a reasonably high (Superior, even, acc. to the Verbal portion of the test results) IQ in conjunction with anxiety rather than a result of his being a profoundly gifted kid who's just struggling to cope in the world. As a matter of fact, I have always been pretty certain he's not in that category, or even highly gifted. Just a very bright kid but with TONS of issues, I guess...The thing is that his fears and anxieties do often relate to the advanced knowledge he has. In his past, fears such as "Our solar lights aren't working today...does that mean the sun is losing power...what does that mean for our future?" and other anecdotes I have shared here along the way. Also, his interests are more for facts and information than anything, and the tester remarked that he is completely disinclined toward any imaginitive play and is very interested in rules (which has ALWAYS been the case) which she took as "precocious, as that is more common for play in 7 and 8 year olds." He also has a HUGE chip on his shoulder and behaves in arrogant ways toward adults, which I deplore, but it seems to be how he is right now.

I think the tester did not like him, as an aside.
post #712 of 776
Quote:
Originally Posted by eilonwy
It's very quiet here... I bet the Yahoo! Group is hopping. Please remember that I can't check my email at home, not until tax season rolls around and we get our real present-- a new computer!
I'm confused. Can you come here to MDC from home but not check the e-mail? Would you be able to go to groups.yahoo.com and log in and access it that way? PM me if you need some help.
post #713 of 776
Quote:
Originally Posted by isisjade
I'm confused. Can you come here to MDC from home but not check the e-mail? Would you be able to go to groups.yahoo.com and log in and access it that way? PM me if you need some help.
It's a matter of time. I probably could get the website to open and access it that way, but I definately can't check my email because I've got web-based mail, which seems to run on the assumption that 90% of people using it will have a high speed connection. Whenever I try to even open the hotmail site, my entire computer crashes and burns. groups.yahoo.com doesn't have a ton of advertisments or crap going on in the background, but I've had several crashes while I attempted to log in from home. MDC doesn't do much, and the few things it does do.. well, let's put it this way: moving smilies don't move on my home computer. The ads freeze up, but then I have no trouble reading posts and clicking links within the site.

I will try to open the website tonight. If it takes me 20 minutes, though... well, the chances are good that I'll have to do something else, like change a diaper or read a BeanBean book or appease the old man.
post #714 of 776
Okay, I managed to read all the posts I'd missed, but I was unable to post to to group. It's progress, though!

Teachma-- from what I read, I'd say that you should probably crumple up those test scores and toss them in the shredder. The person doing the testing obviously had no experience testing gifted children, nor any desire to gain some. Your son's behaviors don't strike me as particularly arrogant, but I'm often accused of arrogance myself so maybe I'm not the best judge. I wouldn't call his behavior oppositional or defiant at all, just somewhat defensive. That's a perfectly logical response, in my mind, for a young child to have when he feels like he's under attack (and I have no doubt that he felt that way, based on your posts). Hell, it's a perfectly logical response from a grownup.
post #715 of 776
Hey, I have the perfect site for BeanBean! Virtual Poop!

Enjoy!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by eilonwy
It's very quiet here... I bet the Yahoo! Group is hopping. Please remember that I can't check my email at home, not until tax season rolls around and we get our real present-- a new computer! Yaaaaay...

So today, BeanBean asked me for "a book about poop. When I eat, the food goes into my stomach and then I burn off some calories and all the bad stuff comes out of this little hole here, see? This is my anus, and that's where the poop comes out. Can you get a book about poop at the library? Can you go right now?" I told him (truthfully) that the library was closed, and he said, "You'll just have to go as soon as it opens, then. Tomorrow!" BeanBean has obviously learned one of the most important lessons there is: if you're interested in it, there's probably a book about it and if you don't have that book, you should go to the library. I promised him that I would look for a book about poop (and then, at his insistence, I wrote the words down in my notebook full of books to borrow from the library, next to his name-- "Eli: A book about poop." ) and said that I would read a different book with him instead. He was happy, I wrote it down and that meant I was taking him seriously, so he brought me "the uterus book!" and we sat down to read that.

I know that fascination with bodily processes is very, very normal in children his age. I'm just amazed at the way that this particular interest manifests in BeanBean. Rather than just walking around saying "poopy" and "butt," he's remembered many discussions about what happens when you eat and asked for a library book about the process, so that he can see pictures of it. I think that's incredibly freaking cool. How upset can I be with a child talking about poop when he's so curious about how it got to *be* poop in the first place?

At the doctor's office, they always have the coolest, most colorful human anatomy charts. I know that they get them from pharmaceutical companies, and I know that they're free. What I want to know is, how can *I* get some of those charts? I saw the most amazing book of systems of the human body with beautiful, full color illustrations in English and Spanish. BeanBean would probably go *nuts* if we had one around the house, it would be just as popular as Ultimate Aircraft, but I've never seen one outside of a doctor's office, and when I asked they said that the reps bring them sometimes. Where can *I* find a pharmaceutical rep with a briefcase full of cool things like that?! I don't care if it says ZITHROMAX in big letters on the bottom of the front cover, with dosing information inside on the first beautiful, laminated page... I just want the book!
post #716 of 776
Rynna, Have you seen Everyone Poops? If not, it's a page turner.

mv
post #717 of 776
Quote:
Originally Posted by eilonwy
Whenever I try to even open the hotmail site, my entire computer crashes and burns.
You wanna try a gmail account? I set up tags for all my mailing lists and have them automatically archived. It gets them out of the inbox, and I can read the mailing lists at my leisure... all sorted by list. There's a minimum of graphical flash on the site too... a big bonus IMHO.
post #718 of 776
Quote:
think that's incredibly freaking cool. How upset can I be with a child talking about poop when he's so curious about how it got to *be* poop in the first place?
100 went through that as well. He was so darn obsessed. Unfortunately, shortly afterward he had a bout of painful constipation (brought on by eating nothing but peanut butter for 3 days He then decided he could OUTSMART his digestive system by NOT eating, no food, no poop, no problem. Of course then he became quite anxious about the whole thing and basically stopped eating for 6 months........ The way it goes with him, try explaining THAT eating difficulty to a family doctor, a pediatrician, and a team of occupational and/or speech therapists witha specialty in feeding disorders :LOL

Now he is fascinated with the nutritional make-up of food. He knows he is/was anemic (starting from the above mentioned 6 month eating strike) and now needs to know what is in each kind of food he may or may not eat. When he comes in from outside he proudly announces to the room that he is all topped up on vitamin D :LOL I have committed to memory the basic vitamin make-up of each kind of food he may want to eat
post #719 of 776
Quote:
Originally Posted by FreeRangeMama
100 went through that as well. He was so darn obsessed. Unfortunately, shortly afterward he had a bout of painful constipation (brought on by eating nothing but peanut butter for 3 days He then decided he could OUTSMART his digestive system by NOT eating, no food, no poop, no problem. Of course then he became quite anxious about the whole thing and basically stopped eating for 6 months........ The way it goes with him, try explaining THAT eating difficulty to a family doctor, a pediatrician, and a team of occupational and/or speech therapists witha specialty in feeding disorders :LOL
I think that I remember you talking a bit about this. The closest that BeanBean has ever been to constipated was not going for three days-- the last day, he had a stomach ache and was kind of miserable and vaguely feverish. I told Mike to get a bit of extra fiber into him and a few hours later he dropped about three pounds. He hadn't been in pain or truly constipated, just withholding because he'd been busy. Silly little man.

I can hardly wait to visit that website! I'm sure that BeanBean will be tickled pink by it. I wonder what the ILs will say... : Heck, it might be worthwhile just for that. Whew, that's much funnier to me than it ought to be... I suppose I should get some sleep. I just can't, though. I'm kind of hungry but I can't eat (my teeth are hurting again ) and besides, I'm knitting a pair of longies for the helper's thread, and darnit, I don't have to see to knit but I do have to be *awake*... kind of... so at least I'm accomplishing something. Eventually I'll be so tired that I can hardly keep my eyes open, and at that point I'll go to bed and knit until I can't feel my fingers moving anymore. I actually accomplish a surprising amount of work this way.

I have seen the book "Everybody Poops," which is great fun, but BeanBean is more interested in the process by which poop becomes poop. He already knows that everybody poops, and has sorted people into those who poop in the toilet and those who don't. That's pretty much the way that the world is divided these days-- into people who use the toilet and wear underpants and people who don't. Very typical classifications for a three year old, I just love it.

OMG, they did the cutest thing this morning! You know that classic Fisher Price stacking toy with the colored rings and the yellow cone in the middle? Well, BeanBean removed the yellow cone from it's base and was pretending to use it as a doppler to listen to an imaginary baby in BooBah's uterus! : Not only was it sweet to watch them playing together, but both kids apparently found this absolutely hilarious! I kept hearing giggles from the two of them, they just couldn't stop laughing. BooBah even cooperated throughout the whole game, she got totally into it. I just thought that was so adorable! Argh, I love those babies so much! :

BeanBean still has uterus envy, but I think that he's making progress in that department (I explained to him that men do play a part in baby making). Apparently, though, nothing could possibly be cooler than carrying a baby inside your very own uterus. He's probably right, but I'd like him to be happy with his own bits and bobs.
post #720 of 776
Quote:
Originally Posted by eilonwy
Okay, I managed to read all the posts I'd missed, but I was unable to post to to group. It's progress, though!

Teachma-- from what I read, I'd say that you should probably crumple up those test scores and toss them in the shredder. The person doing the testing obviously had no experience testing gifted children, nor any desire to gain some. Your son's behaviors don't strike me as particularly arrogant, but I'm often accused of arrogance myself so maybe I'm not the best judge. I wouldn't call his behavior oppositional or defiant at all, just somewhat defensive. That's a perfectly logical response, in my mind, for a young child to have when he feels like he's under attack (and I have no doubt that he felt that way, based on your posts). Hell, it's a perfectly logical response from a grownup.
Rynna, thanks for this. I do definitely agree that ds is defensive; I think much of this comes from the fact that he chooses to compare himself, and his abilities, to adults rather than other children. He constantly sees shortcomings because he knows he doesn't "measure up" to the grown ups in terms of what he knows and what he can do. If he only sought more affirmation from his peers, he'd see...So, he is often "talking the talk" about his intelligence and knowledge, but only in conversation with grown-ups, because he feels less than adequate in comparison and I think he's trying to convince himself that he's as good as we are. We meet with his regular therapist tonight at 6 (unrelated to the testing) and I will deliver the report to her at that time. It is not without my commentary scrawled in the margins as I felt it's important for her to know my opinions on certain matters. We'll see what she says.

About poop...wow, I missed a big discussion here! I like the interest in how poop becomes poop. I like it a lot better than our only (thankfully short-lived) poop issues. Ds has always been extremely regular (TMI, I know) and poops once each day, before bed. One day last year, his stomach was hurting mid-day and he REFUSED to poop because "it isn't night time." I tried to impress upon him that bodily functions aren't attached to times of day always, and I even asked, "What about when you have to sneeze? Do you sneeze only at breakfast time? No...you sneeze whenever your body tells you it's going to sneeze." I know, not a great comparison since one is completely involuntary, but it did kind of help him get the point that when your body sends you a message about what it needs, you need to take care of your body.

Rynna, about listening to the "baby" in BooBah's belly...I find it incredible that BooBah understands the whole pregnancy thing! Just this weekend, we were with a pregnant cousing, and I told dd (20 months old) that there was a baby in her tummy. Dd looked incredulous and said, "No. Too silly. Eat it up baby?" I guess I shouldn't have used the word 'tummy,' which is the same word I use for where the food goes! I just thought uterus would confuse, but I guess tummy did instead! I can't remember when ds "got" that concept, but certainly he did when he was 3 and I was pregnant.
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