What would you do:
My twin dds are 3 and my friend's twin dss are almost 4. The boys have become what I'd call violent and it appears that this is done for attention. Here's what happened yesterday while I was babysitting one of them:
- all three kids are watching a video and I'm sitting in the room writing in a notebook. Out of the blue, the boy hurls a rubber ball into DD#1's face. They all had their faces toward the tv and he just turns in an instant and hits her. I took him onto my lap to talk about what happened. Before I could say a word, he started saying, "OK, OK," and looking away from me. I asked him how he thought he made DD1 feel by hitting her with the ball. He kept saying, "OK, I won't." This made me think he just always says that when his mom tells him to stop whatever he is dong.
- all three are playing with wooden building blocks. I leave the room for a glass of water and immediately hear DD2 shriek and start crying. I run in and pick her up, asking where it hurts, and he is saying (over the crying), "Where my mom and dad?" I said, "What happened?" and he says, "I DIDN'T!!!" over a couple of times. DD1 tells me that he hit her with a block, a blue block. He starts saying, "Didn't! I won't!"
When my friend came by to get him, she asked how it went. I gave a hand signal for so-so and said we could talk later, not in front of him.
Just so you know, these boys (both of them) are always trying for attention by being unsafe: one held my DD under the water at the pool, she came up screaming; one tried to slam the fingers of our neighbor in the door - actually watched til his fingers were in the door then took a slam at them, missing, thankfully; etc.
During the pool incident (it was the other boy that time) my friend said, "Did you push her down? (doesn't wait for an answer at all) Because we don't touch other people in the pool, okay?" They were both saying, "I didn't. I won't" then too.
I want to talk to my friend about this. I wonder what you would do or say?
CurlyTop
My twin dds are 3 and my friend's twin dss are almost 4. The boys have become what I'd call violent and it appears that this is done for attention. Here's what happened yesterday while I was babysitting one of them:
- all three kids are watching a video and I'm sitting in the room writing in a notebook. Out of the blue, the boy hurls a rubber ball into DD#1's face. They all had their faces toward the tv and he just turns in an instant and hits her. I took him onto my lap to talk about what happened. Before I could say a word, he started saying, "OK, OK," and looking away from me. I asked him how he thought he made DD1 feel by hitting her with the ball. He kept saying, "OK, I won't." This made me think he just always says that when his mom tells him to stop whatever he is dong.
- all three are playing with wooden building blocks. I leave the room for a glass of water and immediately hear DD2 shriek and start crying. I run in and pick her up, asking where it hurts, and he is saying (over the crying), "Where my mom and dad?" I said, "What happened?" and he says, "I DIDN'T!!!" over a couple of times. DD1 tells me that he hit her with a block, a blue block. He starts saying, "Didn't! I won't!"
When my friend came by to get him, she asked how it went. I gave a hand signal for so-so and said we could talk later, not in front of him.
Just so you know, these boys (both of them) are always trying for attention by being unsafe: one held my DD under the water at the pool, she came up screaming; one tried to slam the fingers of our neighbor in the door - actually watched til his fingers were in the door then took a slam at them, missing, thankfully; etc.
During the pool incident (it was the other boy that time) my friend said, "Did you push her down? (doesn't wait for an answer at all) Because we don't touch other people in the pool, okay?" They were both saying, "I didn't. I won't" then too.
I want to talk to my friend about this. I wonder what you would do or say?
CurlyTop
I could have hit her. Instead I just stood there dumbfounded. I explained to her what happened. She never apologized. Fast-forward two months: She writes me a note saying she thinks I am "affecting her daughter's self-eteem, and that I favor my daughter over hers". I was crushed. I never did anything of the sort. I completely understood that it wasn't her dd's fault that she was so spoiled: it was hers. I told her I didn't agree with the way she disciplined, but long story short: She still hadn't paid yet rent so I kicked her out. We haven't talked since.
You practically have a whole class there!
