Is it REALLY gross, or are people just uptight? - Page 3

[irinam]

Oh Pandora - I LOVE that last picture of your DD :LOL

[Pandora114]

She wanted to wear lipstick!!! :LOL

[mamabohl]

this thread just made me think of a cute story. A couple weeks ago my MIL was visiting...we took her to Colonial Williamsburg one day, but it poured on us. We were determined to not go home empty handed though so we dashed into a candy shop, and when we came out the rain had stopped breifly. So as ds and I were walking to the car I was pointing out puddles for us to jump in. It was lots of fun, I've always loved puddles. So MIL says, "You're such a good mom."

[Threefold]

:LOL

My ds goes to the grocery filthy. Yup, filthy. He loves the sandpit at school and his teachers are absolutely fabulous about letting the kids dig, roll, bring in gallons of water, and just generally have a good time. I send him to school in old clothes b/c I know he is going to get filthy. We live across town and often have to stop by the grocery on the way home. I'm not going to add, "bring fresh clothes for ds" to my long list of things to organize and remember, so, yup, he's at the store filthy.


But, he never goes to bed like that. (Not mama's bed, at least )

[Peony]

DD is generally pretty dirty all the time. :LOL I can clean her up and 2 seconds later she found a puddle, dirt pile, or something messy. She goes to bed clean and has fun getting dirty the rest of the time.

[Poetmama]

Originally Posted by johub

I was at a party with dh and the kids a few months back. WE were in a friend's backyard playing ring around the rosie with the kids (mine are 3 and 1 1/2 and 1 1/2 and 13) THis sweet little girl just watched and watched us and we asked her to join and she did once, but then she bowed out. She was too afraid she would get dirty. She was maybe four. She sat on the sidelines of life watching other kids have fun, unable to join because of fear that falling down on the grass will make her too dirty.

Hmmm, I worry about the assumption you are making about this girl. DS hates to be dirty. He is very shy, and would not join a game that required him to fall down. He would just watch. He also hates to be wet. It is to the extreme that he MUST change clothes if they are either a bit wet or dirty. I attend the local State college, he attends preschool there two days a week. At the begining of the semester, I make sure his teachers know that he is to change clothes if he says he wants to. I keep two outfits in his cubby. He would be in tears if he was forced to wear something he thinks is dirty (I know, I've tried!) It's his comfort level, not mine, that I am concerned with. I would hate to think that someone thinks I made my son paranoid about dirt when I have encouraged him to explore his entire life!

Now, DD, she is constantly dirty. Sticky by the end of the day. The ring in the bathtub comes from her! Unfortunatly, I have to watch her like a hawk when it comes to playing in our dirt. We just bought this house, I have NO idea what is in the soil (There was an overgrown veggie patch, the previous owners were landscapers)! I worry that what she eats will make her sick.

So, I guess I don't worry about getting dirty as much as I worry about eating the said dirt!

[wildmonkeys]

I let my kids get super dirty in the yard (I also get super dirty gardening and whatnot)

We don't go to the store often - my kids don't really enjoy it so I try to make one shopping trip last for a week or two - I always clean them up before we go. I haven't ever really thought about it since I also clean myself up before we go, ykwim?

I have to say that I am pretty anal about what they actually put in their mouths though - I have to be because ds#2 would literally eat rocks & trash!

BJ
Barney & Ben

[johub]

Originally Posted by Poetmama

Hmmm, I worry about the assumption you are making about this girl. DS hates to be dirty. He is very shy, and would not join a game that required him to fall down. He would just watch. He also hates to be wet. It is to the extreme that he MUST change clothes if they are either a bit wet or dirty. I attend the local State college, he attends preschool there two days a week. At the begining of the semester, I make sure his teachers know that he is to change clothes if he says he wants to. I keep two outfits in his cubby. He would be in tears if he was forced to wear something he thinks is dirty (I know, I've tried!) It's his comfort level, not mine, that I am concerned with. I would hate to think that someone thinks I made my son paranoid about dirt when I have encouraged him to explore his entire life!

My sadness for this child and the feeling that she is missing out on a lot of enjoyment remains whether this is her innate temperament or ingrained by her parents.

[ShadowMom]

Originally Posted by babydoll

A stick is not a safe toy for a baby - they could poke themself in the eye!

I've never understood this reasoning. A baby could poke anything in their eye if they were so inclined. The only time I worried about my guy "poking himself in the eye" was when he was first learning to walk and was prone to tumbles.

Originally Posted by babydoll

ANother thing - every once in awhile I will be at the grocery store or shopping and I will see a dirty filthy kid/baby sitting in the shopping cart while the mother is shopping. THat is absolutely neglectful! I want to tap them on the shoulder and say - "ever heard of soap? -it is cheap!"

What is neglectful about it? What is it that you think is going to happen to the child as a result of being dirty?

Sounds like you just have a bit of a germ phobia, honestly. Which is fine, lots of people do, but please don't project it onto other people and make it their fault.

[Pandora114]

Well my DD IS pretty accident prone. She's 2, been walking for a year now, and I know she stumbles all the time still. Trips over her feet :LOL She's pretty coltish. So no, I won't allow her a stick for that reason.

[UmmBnB]

My kids get filthy. I just clean 'em up before we go out!

I do have a thing for keeping them halfway clean when we aren't at home. I don't want to tote a muddy, slimey kid home and end up having to clean the car seats, van, etc.

[*bejeweled*]

Poetmama, I totally understand your post. My DD is the same way. It is her temperament---no matter how much we encourage her to get dirty, she just does not want to. That is her choice and we honor it.

And Johub, everyone's idea of enjoyment is not the same as YOURS. Imagine that.

Originally Posted by johub

My sadness for this child and the feeling that she is missing out on a lot of enjoyment remains whether this is her innate temperament or ingrained by her parents.

[johub]

It doesnt really matter what my idea of enjoyment is.
If I see a child who wants something but is held back from that desire by something so unimportant as a little dirt, even if it is something I would never do. That is sad.
It would not be sad if she was simply not interested in playing. If she was joyfully and delightfully otherwise occupied.
It IS sad when a child wants to play and wont or cant because of a few flecks of grass.

My daughter once had a birthday party. She was 9. A little girl wouldnt go into the grass to do the pinata because she was wearing sandals and the grass would make her feet itch. I told her I would be happy to get her a nice pair of socks to wear under her sandals so the grass wouldnt bother her.
Her answer was "I'm not allowed to wear socks with sandals" and so she did not hit the pinata.

I respect that some children will not want to play ring around the rosie or hit a pinata. However it is shameful that some children who would want to are held back by such things as a little grass on their dress or feet or the inappropriateness of wearing socks with sandals.
Joline

[*bejeweled*]

Johub,
It does matter what your idea of enjoyment is, because that is what you are using to judge the girl's unwillingness to continue playing. Maybe she just didn't like the game. She tried once right? You say it was because she didn't want to get dirty. Did she say that? Or did you assume it?

[bri276]

if a child is truly filthy as in neglected filthy- you won't have to guess, you will smell it. it won't be some dirt on the shirt or orange cheeto stuff on the face- it'll be urine, BO, and must. unfortunately, I know that much.

dirt. sticks, rocks, grass, leaves, and water are natures free toys. (and bugs sometimes!) we played for hours outside in the woods, in the sprinkler, digging in the dirt. it's perfectly safe and healthy (of course, if you were in a seedy neighborhood parking lot with cigarette butts on the ground I'd say no). But in the park? who cares!! if the kid is happy and safe leave em alone.

[johub]

Originally Posted by *bejeweled*

Johub,
It does matter what your idea of enjoyment is, because that is what you are using to judge the girl's unwillingness to continue playing. Maybe she just didn't like the game. She tried once right? You say it was because she didn't want to get dirty. Did she say that? Or did you assume it?

She actually said that she didnt want to get dirty. WHich is the only reason I would have included it in this thread. It has nothign to do with me or my sense of enjoyment.

[Attila the Honey]

My dd is dirty all the time, she starts out clean and gets messier and messier throughout the day. If she's outside playing and gets grungy and I realize I need to go grab something at the store chances are slim that I am going to bother to bathe her. Give me a break! I dare someone to make that comment about soap to me. Besides, if the next parents who use that cart are the type that care about stuff like that they will probably have one of those super pimped out shopping cart covers. :LOL

When dd was 10 months old she was outside gnawing on a stick. My SIL, who is a total neatfreak, came over and said, "She has a stick in her mouth...". My dh said, "Oh yeah, I know. She's teething." and just continued to let her gnaw. She was obviously shocked and disapproving. (But then, she's the one that wiped her dd's face after every bite of cake on her 1st bday. She couldn't even stand to do the traditional "let the baby smash cake all over herself" first bday ritual.)

My MIL watched my dd for the first time yesterday and when i got home dd was clean, her hair was put in place with a barrette, and she had a new outfit on. I told MIL that was totally unnecessary because I like seeing dd messy. I like seeing what she did that day all over her clothes and face. I jokingly told MIL that the only kids who are clean at the end of the day are the ones that did nothing but sat in front of the TV. (Ok, ok, I know that's not true and no offense intended to those of you with neat kids. )

[Pigpen]

this was yesterday...

http://photobucket.com/albums/v736/i...t=P8240002.jpg
that tells you how I feel about it :LOL
We have a hose hooked up to our wash basin so I can hose them off with warm water before they come in for a bath.

[philomom]

Dirty is a wonderful thing to be. That's why we have a bath at the end of the day, hmm?

[meemee]

frankly i have been fortunate to always get the 'good mom' comment mostly from old men. never had anyone frown on my dirty child yet - even when at 16 months she was stomping in a greasy dirty knee deep puddle at 1 am on an icy cold morning. home was 5 mins away and the coffee shop inmates coming out from the band we had gone to see all gathered around smiling and laughing at my dd's obvious enjoyment of the moment. u could feel the 'laughter' in the air.