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had a crappy midwife appointment...

post #1 of 14
Thread Starter 
We had the worst midwife appointment on Thursday, and I need advice on what she said to me. We didn't get to see either of our regular midwifes yesterday, we had to see the brand new lady, Sharon. Apparently she worked for the practice years ago as an RN (I'm assuming that she worked for the dr and not the mw's) and has just graduated from midwife school.

Anyways, she told me that my blood pressure was borderline high at 120/80, which from my understandings is prefectly normal. She sais that most pregnant women have 100/60 whatever. Then she told me that I shouldn't work until the end (I'm a cashier) because standing is very bad for me, and will raise my blood pressure even more, where my regular midwives haven't said a word when I told them I would like to work right until the end. I know things might change, and I may start to feel worse, but so far I feel ridiculously fine, and can't imagine what I'd do at home for two weeks before my due date, nevermind being overdue. I also think that my body will let me know when it's time to stop work, and that I truly will know better than she can what is 'good' for me.

Then she told me that they like to start stripping membranes at 37-38 weeks to ensure that you never go past 41 weeks. I don't know how I feel about that at all. I mean MAYBE by 40 weeks that is something I would consider, but not early. I know that that is something I could refuse, but it just rubbed me the wrong way. I'm sure my blood pressure was high when I left.

I will not be able to talk to our favourite midwife until oct as she is going to be gone for the entire month of sept. I have to see this one again for my next appointment in 2 weeks I have thought about just cancelling that one, but oh well. We get to see our second midwife the appointment after that, and I will mention all this to her then. I think everything that his crazy woman said to me has stressed me out the most. More than work, more than anything else. She also said that I needed to be rested for my homebirth and needed at least 2 weeks off in order to do that. I mean really, can you bank sleep? no. SO seriously, I will be totally rested even if I work two days before my due date AND actually deliver on my due date, which I highly doubt. Thanks for listening, Mel
post #2 of 14
She sounds like a medwife..
post #3 of 14
From my understanding (and it may be poor) some midwives do classify the 120/80 as borderline average/high; but it's more that if there's a 20-point difference between your normal (nonpregnant) and pregnant bp there's a reason for concern. But a one-time reading is not cause for concern (could be stress, lotsa salt, etc) - I think it's more if they see it steadily climbing over time into the higher ranges (90s) combined with other signs of preeclampsia. Standing on your feet all day does increase BP;and lying down on your left side decreases it; but it seems rather early to be talking about stripping membranes and such.

If you think she's off her rocker, can you just skip an appt or are you already at every 2 week appts (32 weeks)? Is this woman in danger of delivering your baby? I would call your normal midwife and have a talk with her about your concerns with this other woman; and what she said. You don't have to wait for a later appt.
post #4 of 14
I'd skip the next appt with her. I know that i've been told by midwives and by previous ob/gyns that 120/80 is the normal bp range. So i wouldnt trip, maybe you were nervous about seeing someone new? And as far as stripping the membranes, REFUSE IT!!!!! I dont have the exact stats but the percentage of women it actual helps put into labor is not as high as doctors say (i can research it if you need). And i can speak from first hand experience. I had my membranes stripped at 40 weeks and a day or two and it did NOTHING exact cause me tonsssss of pain, bleeding, and agony. Not to mention the door it opens for introducing infection.

Just my 2 cents worth. Im mostly on the oct board as my due date is the 24th, but i check in on the nov board too since i was overdue with my first dd and very well could be delivering with you all in november. Good luck and dont do anything you arent comfy with (listen to your gut)!!!
post #5 of 14
I'm passive aggressive so I'd just cancel my next appt w/her, too. Try to talk to your midwife before she leaves just for reassurance.

I had a dr and a mw for my first birth. My dr. scheduled me for an induction and I just called in sick. Twice. Had ds at home the next day. :LOL What are they gonna do? You're sick!

Oh, and I worked until 14 days overdue w/ds2 as a kindergarten teacher; ie. moving on my feet constantly.
post #6 of 14
She's new and inexperienced. If you give her a year or two, then she'll realise for herself that women know where their boundaries are- but until then, it's a case of damage limitation. Because of your b/p, I'd try not to skip the next appointment just in case something IS brewing- but let's face it, she's got nothing left in her arsenal to try and scare you with, and it's going to be kind of hard to force you to take your maternity leave, and harder to sweep your membranes without permission.
My blood pressure has consistently been 130/80 for years, both pregnant and on the pill- this time it's significantly lower at 100/60. For me, the biggest change was switching to sea salt in cooking and eating, instead of standard table salt- and also, having fewer synthetic hormones in my body. Your hormone levels you're stuck with now, but the sea salt thing might be worth trying, if it's concerning you?
As far as work goes, I'd try and make your job fit in around you. (I worked on Saturday for only 6 hours, and felt incredibly ill when I got home. My ankles had swollen by a couple of inches on each foot, I was sick and I could barely walk. People like me is why they tell us to take maternity leave before the end of pregnancy) Get a chair or stool, and support stockings, and try and use them as much as you can, just in case.
post #7 of 14
I did read a study that said that women who worked, had higher blod pressure in pregnancy than women who don't work. But that may be a normal BP for you. And if not working is not an option, then you just need to work with that. Get enough rest when you are not working. And start talking your BP at home. I got a great self test kit (manual) for around $30 and my readings are always normal at home.

As far as stripping your membranes, just don't take your pants off. It will be hard for anyone to get in there if you are not naked on a table. There is no reason for vaginal exams late in pregnancy, so just refuse them all.

What happens after 41 weeks? Are they mandated by law to turn you over to OB care? Or does she just think you dont want to go past 41 weeks?
post #8 of 14
Originally Posted by oetien
She sounds like a medwife..

You've gotten some good advice here. I would definately refuse the stripping of the membranes...Im not even going to get examined just in case thats something they do because alot of times they wont tell you they're doing it.
post #9 of 14
Thread Starter 
thanks for all the great advice ladies! From what I understand, my blood pressure has been 120/80 for my entire pregnancy, so I just don't see how it can be bad. I feel a lot better about it today, after I've had a couple days to cool off. I think I will cancel my next appointment, we'll see how I feel about it closer to the time.

As far as my job goes, yes I do stand on my feet, but I make a point to walk around quite a bit, and also put my feet up when I can, or sit. I have a prescription for support hose from my doc, that I will phone about today to get in for a fitting.

Yeah, membrane stripping. I was a bit thrown off by it, but I will simply refuse. I will wait until I see a regular mw to talk about it again. She will not be my primary caregiver when I am delivering, but there is a slight chance that she will be there as in this province, you are required to have 2 mw's for a home birth, so my mw would call in another when I'm close to delivering. I will talk about my concerns ahead of time, and hopefully she will not be on call that night, or I can request to not call her.
post #10 of 14
If your BP has been 120/80 for your whole pregnancy, then it's not high for you. It's not high at all. That's a pretty good BP! Perhaps she is referring to the "drop" in BP that many women have in the 2nd trimester. If you didn't get that drop, maybe she's noting that? Anyway, it sounds like hogwash, but use your intuition...

She does sound like a real newbie. Mine is too, but she's amazing and has enormous amounts of trust in the body.

I cannot imagine that they are stripping membranes starting at 37 weeks. That's outrageous! What if you're GBS positive? They still run the risk? Seems a little off.

Good luck to you!
post #11 of 14
I think that instead of just skipping or canceling your next appt. (with her) you should call and talk to one of the midwives that you *do* like, tell them your concerns, and even tell them that you don't feel comfortable at all with this midwife. You might be able to see someone else instead for that appt, or even if you can't and you do miss that one appt, then at least you won't be waiting a month to talk to someone else - you can get these issues discussed/straightened out right away. xo
post #12 of 14
I would not worry to omuch about your BP. 120/80 consistently is perfectly normal. Although there is typically a 2nd trimester drop in BP, Hypertension in pregnancy is defined as readings of 140 or higher 6 hours apart or an increace of 20 points diastolic and systolic. So if your normal BP was 100/60 and all of a sudden it went up to 120/80, I could see the need for concern. Just keep an eye on it and also kepe an eye out for swelling of your hands and face.
post #13 of 14
My midwife was happy when my bp went from 90/60 at my last second-trimester appt to 112/80 at my first third trimester appt. That's pretty close to yours... and yes 120/80 does seem like a perfectly normal bp.

That midwife sounds a bit dicey. What is the point of having a midwife if they're going to adhere as closely to the medical model of practice as a doctor?
post #14 of 14
120/80 is not high at all. I was in the hospital the other day for a check up (labor contractions) and my BP was 138/85 and they said that was perfectly normal and nothing to be alarmed about even with my pre-disposition to preeclampsia.

And stripping membranes at 37-38 weeks, oh hell no!!! I wouldn't strip mine unless I was OVERDUE and even then I probably would NOT. There is nothing natural about it and it can risk infection - as well as the fact htat it is painful. Stripping membranes induces labor in 1/8 pregnancies and is otherwise worthless.

She sounds like a bad OBGYN - not a midwife. I would make it clear you do not want her attending your birth or any further appointments with her and I would stipulate as to why.
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