A mother told me a horrendous story yesterday...*UPDATE*

[candiland]

A mom was leaving my friend's restaurant. He asked her how her baby was. She said, "Fine, except for that little problem. " I said innocently, "Oh, what's wrong?"

She proceeded to tell me her baby boy had a messed up circumcision. Turns out it wasn't actually BOTCHED, they didn't take off enough foreskin and "he doesn't even look circumcised!" (Oh, the horror, how assanine.) So now the foreskin keeps adhering to the head and she takes him in weekly to have it forcibly separated and retracted : : : She said her son was at home right now passed out after screaming hysterically for three hours straight because he had just been to the ped. to have it done.

Not only that, but she's having him RECIRCUMCISED. I began to tell her that my son's intact and that it's becoming the norm. She said, "I know, but my husband needs our son to look like him... plus, he's Jewish, so he'll need to fit in later. I don't really have a say."

I told her about how the penis was trying to re-heal itself and that forcibly separating the glans and foreskin could lead to numerous complications. That it should just re-adhere and it would retract naturally when it was ready. I also mentioned that if they insisted or re-circumcising, it didn't matter what the penis looked like right now, anyway!!!!! :

How this sexual mutilation is allowed to continue is beyond me. I am so disgusted by this ignorant woman I couldn't even look at her at the end.

[melissa_honeybee]

poor baby! That sounds awful and really traumatizing.

[ishtarmaia]

Man, I am feeling for that poor, poor little baby! I am trying to find compassion in my heart for everyone. How sad it is for the baby and the momma---she must be in some kind of deep denial to allow her son to be put through that. She obviously REALLY FEELS that she doesn't have a say (she is powerless), therefore, she is allowing the torture of her own child. It reminds me to put my energy not towards the horror, but towards the empowerment of all humans everywhere, and towards sexual mutilation becoming a rare occurence. You did a good thing by trying to educate without losing it on her. I'm sure you planted seeds that will grow and blossom when she is ready to face the truth.
I know it is hard, but if we want the world to be peaceful, we have to remember that everyone is in their perfect process and it is all unfolding according the Universal Will. Judging others is not supporting the evolution of the human species. The best we can do is to educate and be involved in creating awareness and raising consciousness, and that's what you did. Good going!

[lilsishomemade]

Oh, poor baby!! I know, my boys are circ'd (dumb mistake, I really regret it) because daddy wanted them to look like him....well, what a shock, they don't completely remove the foreskin anymore, so they *still* don't look like him. You think they're only doing it partially now so that the circ'd boys won't feel so different when they're in the minority?

[jessjgh1]

If they had a bris then they don't need to do anymore to fulfill the Jewish commandments (and Jews can choose to do an alternate ceremony for the bris without the cutting).

That is just too sad- unfair too that the pedi is suggesting those methods as alternatives.

That poor baby.

Jessica

[mommymarliah]

man that makes me want to throw up. I have had to stay away from this board because reading stuff like this makes me sick. Why do people do this to their children?!?

[Lula's Mom]

Originally Posted by lilsishomemade

You think they're only doing it partially now so that the circ'd boys won't feel so different when they're in the minority?

No, my understanding is that some doctors have realized that taking off every bit of foreskin results in really tight, uncomfortable or even painful erections for men. So a few wonderful, compassionate doctors who care *so much* (smell the sarcasm!) are doing "loose" circumcisions, to avoid this problem later in life. Her baby might have been one of the luckier circumcised boys, if they weren't torturing him and giving him more complications on a weekly basis.

Unfortunately parents don't like the look of the loose circs. They think it looks like not enough was cut off, and often want to have it redone. They don't realize that the boy will grow into that skin they think is "extra". And if he's lucky won't have a tight erection problem later.

[Frankly Speaking]

Stories like this are becoming very common. First, it's the OB/GYN that does the loose circumcision but never sees the result a few months later. Then the pediatrician steps in and thinks that all circumcised boys should have a fully exposed glans plus is totally unaware of what is happening with the healing process and that just as with an intact boy, the remnant foreskin will eventually detach. In all of this ignorance and malpractice, everyone is clueless and the baby is tortured again. I have even heard of third circumcisions and we once had a mother here whose son's penis was denuded in one of these second circumcisions and the skin from his hip was being taken to graft back onto his penis. Not only would he have an awful looking penis, he will also have a horrible scar on his hip for the rest of his life and an explanation to his lovers in the future as to why his penis looks so odd and why he has this awful scar on his hip. How can it get worse?

Well, it can . . . On another board some time back, there was a woman who had a twice circumcised son and was going to have him circumcised again. How pathetic!




Frank

[mirlee]

Can someone please stop her?? That child is being traumatized. My son was circumcised, please no flames, and it was a very loose one. I would never think to have it redone or to do any of this stuff. If I had known then what I know now, I would not have had it done at all.

I think circumcision is completely unneccessary. Should I ever have another boy, I would not do this. I am Jewish, so this could be a big deal.

[Lula's Mom]

mirlee, i respect and admire you for that.

[lilsishomemade]

Oh, Frank, that's so awful! With my second son, his circ had problems healing. You know, I just never questioned it, until that. And, yes, there is a little sign left of the problem (a little scar), and I feel awful for doing that to him. It will probably not be real noticeable when he gets older, but still. If this next child is a boy, I'm definitely not allowing that to happen again.

[candiland]

ishtarmaia, I absolutely agree with you. The fact that she and her husband are totally uneducated on the subject is, unfortunately, very common, and I don't think they're causing their son all that pain and trauma *on purpose*, at least not that they can see.

They didn't have a bris, the circ. was done in the hospital, which has no religious significance at all. I think she and her husband were concerned that if he grew up where they are living now, he'd be mocked and ashamed of being intact.

Mirlee, it sounds like she was listening to what I had to say. I told her to google "circumcision" and do some research, because all the medical and research lit. confirms that forcible retraction causes complications and unnecessary trauma. I told her most docs don't know that you need to care for a circ.d penis whose foreskin has re-adhered like an intact penis, which means LEAVE IT ALONE!

[mirlee]

I am glad she was listening. Hopefully this whole practice will be stopped and the intact penis will be the norm.

[Terpatude]

UGH..Poor little fellow.I only wish more people would get edcuated...

[MamaTT]

I feel ill.

[bravofrenchie]

Why why why why WHY can't they just leave their son's penis alone?!? Not just this family, but everybody?

I used to work with a man who was born in Korea in 1962. (Korean mother, American father.) He wasn't circumcised at birth because, he said, they "just didn't do that." His Dad decided to move the family to the U.S, and two more boys were born. (Both circumcised at birth, of course. America in the sixties.) When he was 8 years old, his parents decided that it was important that he look like his younger brothers, so they had him circumcised - at 8 YEARS OLD!

[Frankly Speaking]

Frenchie, that is common in Korea. Korea picked up the practice in the early 50's from American G.I.s posted there during the Korean War but they don't do it at birth but usually during the teen years. It's just an aberation of our practice. However, it is usually the young man that is fully on board with it. It's heavily promoted and they are pretty much pushed into it but most of them that can get their head together and think clearly above the social pressure can say "no."

All things considered, it is their decision but in reality, it really isn't either. They are just sheep that willingly go to the slaughter house.



Frank

[candiland]

Alright, remember this story? Well, my friend whose restaurant this happened in IS HAVING THE SAME "PROBLEM"!!!!!!

He had a bris. I casually mentioned the other day that his son didn't look circumcised, in a positive way. He said yeah, he has surgery scheduled for when the baby turns six months old because "it wasn't done right". :

I started to explain how it was actually a GOOD thing, and he said, "NO, no it's not, it was done wrong." I began to explain that LOGICALLY speaking, it was done just fine... and he butted in and said, "Faith does not require logic." : I explained that a bris was a bris and that commandment had already been fulfilled and that surgery has zero to do with his faith. So he started getting very angry, saying, "well, it doesn't matter, because it wasn't done right." I explained my years of working in the pediatric practice and the complications we saw because of tight circ.s, adhesions, etc.

He got very angry and totally shut me down at that point: "Look, it wasn't done right! End of discussion! The skin is stuck to the head of the penis! HE NEEDS TO BE RECIRCUMCISED!"

: : : These quack doctors and urologists need to be sued, fired, or both. For ANYONE to actually BELIEVE this crap and PROMOTE it in this day and age is a complete uneducated sicko and should stay far, far away from vulnerable infants and their parents.

[Lula's Mom]

That sucks, candiland. I am so sorry your friend wouldn't listen to you. Poor, poor baby.

Faith does not require logic... :LOL That just struck me funny.

[De-lovely]

Aww Candiland-how frustrating! I hate it when people refuse new information on subjects they are clueless about.....and at their childs expense at that! That precious boy is def. being traumatized to have to go thru these procedures over and over....I just dont get it!