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Identical Twin Girls- Clothes- Sharing?

post #1 of 14
Thread Starter 
My girls are 3 1/2 and are very into clothing and what they wear. We are starting to experience problems, fighting over ownership of a particular item. They have always been given separate yet similar items for B-Day and X-mas however, I have forgotten who got what. They both have different styles and mix and match the pieces in their own unique way. They share a bedroom and a closet, I am not sure how I would divide the wardrobe. Should I force them to share or should I let them divide their stuff. Either way it seems like there is big fights ahead.
post #2 of 14
Thread Starter 
Just wanted to bump this thread-- I am desperate and need a solution!!!
Help mama's please, please, please!!!
post #3 of 14
Thread Starter 


I am going to bump this again-- if I get no responses this time I WILL CRY!! :LOL
post #4 of 14
My girls are younger than yours & are just starting to be posessive about clothes (& other things). In most cases (where we have different but similar things) I do know whose was whose at least originally (from birth we've "color coded" w/ pink being for Lexie & purple being for Ashlyn, if they're not those 2 colors it's not quite as set in stone but I have a convoluted (that nobody else has bothered to try to figure out LOL) system of whose whose for other colors too LOL.) although w/ some items they've decided to switch. We also have alot of hand-me-downs that of course don't have a 2nd "matching" one. So far they've been fine w/ taking turns getting to choose first (from 3 outfits that I pull out). I think if/when that stops working we'll go through & decide whose are whose & I'll mark the tags w/ 1st initials for future reference. Then we'll rearrange closet & drawers to be half Lexie's & half Ashlyn's and let that be that. They'll still have the option of "borrowing" from each other as long as it's a mutual agreement.

But that's all theoretical since it's not an issue at our house yet
post #5 of 14
I think it is a girl thing. My older 2 fight over clothes and they are not even the same size
post #6 of 14
My little sisters were dressed exactly the same from the time they were born till they were....I don't know eight or so...and they still fought over clothes even though one was a size bigger then the other!!
After they started dressing in their own styles...which was still the same...they fought over clothes but eventually figured out something that worked for them.
I do think it is a girl thing and they will probably find a way to sort it out even if you have to help them find a happy medium....a way to keep the clothes straight though and something my mother did was first initials on the tags of the clothing....so even if they wanted to share them between the two they still knew in the end who's was whos.
post #7 of 14
Something to keep in mind is that it's not a good idea to have your girls share panties. I am friends with two sets of twins, and plenty of sisters close in age and they all HATED it. Very early on they got to an age where it really just grossed them out. Most of their parents helped them figure out a way to keep them seperate, except on set of sisters, they had a single dad that just couldn't see what the big deal was even after they started their periods. I would hang a divider in the closet and separate their clothes out putting initials on the tags. The biggest complaint I hear from people that are either twins, or had a sibbling of the same size close in age, but especially twins, are that they never felt like they had anything of their own. It's got to be incredibly hard sharing EVERYTHING, kwim.
post #8 of 14
Grew up with a sister 17 months younger... we had many coordinating/matching outfits and during periods of our lives we were the same size. We, of course fought about clothes, but I'm not too sure any measure would have changed that.

The biggest deal for us was drawers, socks and towels of all things. Sister had slightly smaller feet until we were about 10 and 11, so I hated when Mom would buy the same type of socks in two sizes and then they would be hard to match. So, mom started using thread on the toe line to change that. Hated sharing drawers because one was always complaining the other was to messy... two seperate dressers would have probably been best for that.

Towels were a big deal in the family in general once we started taking showers seperately. The person to go last often complained that the first person had either taken all the towels out of the bathroom, or that they were all wet. One christmas Mom went out and bought a complete towel set for each kid, each a different color. If you got caught with another's towel, you owed them a load of laundry to clean their towels.

Underwear was never a problem between us.... we shared underwear throughout our childhood and have been known on occasion to share as adults. There was NEVER a gross factor on that. And ALL clothes (including underwear) were handed down as long as they were in decent shape.

All that to say that I'm not sure that you can get rid of the arguing... its just the nature of close in age and size (or twin) girls. Mom tried marking tags, always getting me pink or greeen and sister purple or blue, different drawers, different laundry baskets, etc and it helped. But until we learned to work it out ourselves and respect each other's belongings, I'm not sure anything was a cure all.
post #9 of 14
Thread Starter 
Thanks for the replies!!

After my OP girl B purposefully took all the clothes in their closet down just to make a big mess (she thinks this is funny). When this has happened before I have made them clean it up. But, this was not working because they keep doing it especially when friends are over (showing off, I guess). So I had to go to plan 2, all clothes taken away for 3 days. Both girls had been warned that this would be the consequence However, I don't think girl B fully understood what had happened until the next morning when her clothes were picked out for her and all the other clothes were gone. When this happened we had friends over and I just calmly explained to girl B that I was going to take the clothes away like we had discussed, her response was OK mama. Then I took several trash bags to their room and put their clothes in them and put them down in the basement. I must have looked like a freak to my friends who were over at the time. :LOL No, they understood that I had to make a point about messes and respecting the things you have. This is day 3 and Girl B has been frustrated that she dosen't get to choose her clothing in the morning and girl A just goes down to the basement and picks out what she wants to wear. I have no idea if this is going to work but, I do think I have made my point.

So, now is a good time to work out a tagging system for the clothes. Thanks again for all the ideas.

We have already decided to get the girls their own towel sets for X-mas and I think they will love it. It defiantly a girl thing, I can't imagine a boy caring about clothes or towels. :LOL
post #10 of 14
hmmmmm...a peek into my future.


How will you devide up the clothes? Will you let them take turns choosing items?
post #11 of 14
Thread Starter 
update- Girl B cleaned up their room (picked-up stuffed animals, place in basket and then picked-up hangers that were on the floor and put them away in the closet), all this without prompting. DH and I decided that she would get her clothing privileges back due to good behavior. She was sooo excited when I told her, jumping up and down . I think drastic measures worked.

I don't know how I am going to organize everything yet, I will let you know.
post #12 of 14
gosh i am not organized enough to deal with that. its already starting at 2 1/2 yrs old but i hope doesnt turn into fighting all the time. my kids are just going to have to learn to share till they can devide and organize for themselves. i dont have enough energy to separate clothes piles. i do good just to clean the clothes and fold them.
post #13 of 14
yk, this has really not been a problem. We have a lot of the pink/purple stuff here, but also a lot of identical clothes. They can tell their clothes apart better than we can. If they start to fight I just tell them that I will take the item in question and pick out something else for both of them to wear.

As far as getting into the dresser/closet, those are not accessible. Well, at least not at 2 1/2. Their dresser had u-shaped pulls, so I put a stick down through the handles to keep them from opening it, and we had one of the door knob thingies on the closet door. They are 4 1/2 now and do a good job of keeping their closet and dresser neat (for a 4 1/2 yo, I still have to go through and refold/neaten about once every 2 weeks).
post #14 of 14
Originally Posted by moondiapers
Something to keep in mind is that it's not a good idea to have your girls share panties...
Any particular reason for this? If the panties are clean, what's the big deal?

I do think it's really, really gross. But my girls don't care one bit, in fact they will come downstairs and say "look, I'm wearing her panties and she's wearing mine" and giggle about it. I've had to stop them from switching mid-day a couple of times, ewwww!
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