Would you pull your child out of school because of morning prayers? UPDATED - Page 3

[sleepies]

at 3.......

at 3 years old it was like a nursery rhyme to him.
he didn't understand what was being said really.

not sure how old original poster's children are though.

i only have a few minutes a day to read and post.

sorry.

[coopnwhitsmommy]

Originally Posted by littleaugustbaby

Nursery rhymes and pious doctrine aren't quite the same thing, CWM.

No they aren't but the point I was making was if saying a prayer over and over is brainwashing. then saying a nursery ryme over and over is to. And most of us wouldn't bat an eyelash over the latter.

Indoctrination yes...brainwashing No

[Satori]

Originally Posted by sleepies

at 3 years old it was like a nursery rhyme to him.
he didn't understand what was being said really.

not sure how old original poster's children are though.

i only have a few minutes a day to read and post.

sorry.

She's 5 and smart enough to question what the prayer means.

[littleaugustbaby]

Originally Posted by coopnwhitsmommy

No they aren't but the point I was making was if saying a prayer over and over is brainwashing. then saying a nursery ryme over and over is to. And most of us wouldn't bat an eyelash over the latter.

Indoctrination yes...brainwashing No

I understand the point that you were trying to make. The point that I was trying to make is that your view is slightly skewed.

It isn't the repetition that's brainwashing. It's the repetition of something that promotes a specific worldview that's brainwashing.

[Satori]

Update

I just spoke with the school and they apologized for omitting the tidbit about the prayer and said its normally something that's discussed when you take a tour of the school but she admitted she may have forgotten to tell me. She did offer the option of just dropping dd off after morning opening but taking dd to school that late is not an option for me. So they are issuing a refund and it better include my $250 reg fee!

[coopnwhitsmommy]

Originally Posted by littleaugustbaby

I understand the point that you were trying to make. The point that I was trying to make is that your view is slightly skewed.

It isn't the repetition that's brainwashing. It's the repetition of something that promotes a specific worldview that's brainwashing.

gotcha...missed that little bit there

[mammastar2]

Good for you for going with your gut on this one! How strange that a prayer promoting a specific religion would be something "they usually mention during the tour" - um, it reflects the philosophical underpinnings of the institution, it's not like pointing out the distance between the classrooms and the bathrooms, or the play equipment...

I'm still curious as to how on earth their reaction to your daughter's family situation came up? (Sorry, being nosey, but I just don't get it)

I hope public school works out ok for you two, and I'm glad they're cool with refunding the deposit.

[Elowyn]

Yeah - I'd not be sending my child there either. I'm religious, but if they were reciting a prayer that was contrary to my beliefs (a different religion, or a daily recitation promoting atheism) then I wouldn't feel comfortable with it either. Fine for those kids whose parents are on board with it, not fine for mine.

[HelloKitty]

Sorry I just came upon this thread - I definetly think you did the right thing. I wouldn't put my child there either but what is most important is that YOU didn't feel comfortable and you should always trust you gut on such things. So glad they refunded your money!!

[Marsupialmom]

I do not disagree with pulling your child out. The religious attitude is kind of creepy.

But about the father issue………. When are you going to discuss that with her. IMO, she is at the age she needs to know the answers why she doesn’t have a daddy. There are going to be kids at school that do have them. Even in public school the daddy question will come up. Plus she is at the age to be asking how she was made and to know it does take a male (daddy) part.

If she was created by sperm donation that needs to be explained to her. That yes there is a bological father that you don't know.

The guy part of her creation does need to be explained. She does have a biological father out there that she doesn't know.

I don't know what you have said to her about this at this point but I would really worry about the emotional impact of not having an understanding why she doesn't know the story (age appropraite) about bio-daddy. Kind of like an adopted child finding out their story at school/from other sources.

[aran]

Originally Posted by Satori

She's 5 and smart enough to question what the prayer means.

But she has never broached the subject of a Daddy? Surprising. I also vote that the Daddy thing seems like something that might come up in the schoolyard among kids... or even inadvertently by a teacher. Seems like your lack of full disclosure to such a smart 5-year-old could turn around and bite ya. But you weren't asking about that so I'll shut up now.

[Satori]

Originally Posted by Chunklin'sMommy

But she has never broached the subject of a Daddy? Surprising. I also vote that the Daddy thing seems like something that might come up in the schoolyard among kids... or even inadvertently by a teacher. Seems like your lack of full disclosure to such a smart 5-year-old could turn around and bite ya. But you weren't asking about that so I'll shut up now.

I was advised repeatedly by councilors to wait until she asks about him. She's never questioned why she doesn't have one but she's also seen a very diverse population of families. Rarely has she seen a nuclear family set up. She's just now figuring out that babies come from mommies tummies because she was looking at the Sears book on pregnancy for kids, the title escapes me at the moment. There are some things she just doesn't care about. For instance she's never asked what makes a boy different from a girl. She's seen naked boy babies but she just doesn't care about the difference. There are some things she just accepts without question, the daddy issue has been one of them. She'll be being reassesed by the school psych this month and I plan on talking to her about the issue then as to what, if anything I should do as I trust her judgement.

[aran]

I see. It's amazing what kids choose to show an interest in and when... they're all so different!

[Gypsy Girl]

prayer in school

I wouldnt send her. I am not big on public school either though, but maybe you (I am sure you have figured this out by now) could put her in a public one for a year or two. I have taught my three year old here at home scince birth. He is way ahead of the kindergarten level and I am having him tested when schooltime comes to have him placed in a little higher of a grade, as I think most kindergartens are milk, cookies,playtime and naps. I want him to get a good education. I do not believe it is the schools place to tell your daughter about her missing parent, this is for you to discuss with her in a way she will understand. Schools have no reason to poke their noses in your private life unless there is a darn good reason. I would be livid myself if I was in your situation and the school was misrepresenting itself like that. With 'non religion' but having prayers and poking its nose where it isnt warranted.

[talk de jour]

The fact that you KNOW that they PLAN on telling her about her father is a little disturbing. I can see it being mentioned offhand, but not PLANNED.

As for the prayer... I would find that horrifying. I would pull dc out IMMEDIATELY.

[Pete]

My 2 cents

If I might add my 2cents, the issue here is dishonesty. I wouldn't willingly leave my child with a babysitter for an hour if I knew that babysitter was dishonest with me. Why would anyone want to put their child in a school that is deliberately dishonest? You have to be able to trust the people who are around your child - not just to be honest with you but to respect your choices for your child. The moment that trust is broken, it's time to move on.

IMO, if this school doesn't bother to find out what a parent's life choices are, how could they possibly respect them? And if they don't publicize their own beliefs and ideas to parents, on something as controversial as school prayer, then it's pretty clear to me they are being intentionally deceptive. Run!!!

Pete

[writermommy]

The prayer thing wouldn't be a big deal to me. I would think this is to be expected in private schools. Most that I have seen do have some form of praying/ religious education, which is a reason many parents choose it. However, they should have been honest. My SIL wanted my neices in Catholic school when they moved to FL but the school was full. So she sent them to a supposedly non denominational school and was told they just gave the basic overview that is common to all Christian religions and it wouldn't interfere with her catholic upbringing.

BS. Within a month they told my 4th grade neice that Catholics are going to hell and Mary the mother of Jesus was a whore and nothing special. Can you even believe that???????????????????? Needless to say, the kids were pulled out of that school of psychos.

As to the Dad thing, eventually she will ask. All kids eventually learn that everyone has a male parent. However, this is up to you to answer when she asks. I would have an answer ready to go because she will run into a lot more Daddies when she is in school. This is totally up to you. My kids go to Catholic school and they never really ask these questions of us. My friends daughter lives with her mom and boyfriend and the school refers to him as her dad, which is very cool. THey should just stay out of it and let you handle that situation when it comes up.